


Sigh No More | Book 1

by Atumun15



Series: How Our Lives Are Meant to be [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: 3RACHA, Angst, Book 1, Chan is like, Chan shows up in section 2 oops, Church boy!Changbin, Fluff, M/M, OT3, Polyamory, Powerful, Special Abilities, Supernatural kind of, This is gonna be a long book, Trilogy, You'll understand later, and only the other members get like, im bad at tags pls, reckless kid!Jisung, slightly mentioned, the breakup of this book is weird okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-07-22
Packaged: 2019-10-08 22:18:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 123,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17394719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Atumun15/pseuds/Atumun15
Summary: “This power only awakens in those truly angry at the world. The need for change has to be strong enough that it changes something inside of you as well,”





	1. SECTION I

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!
> 
> I'm back, hoes, and with a whole new trilogy. 
> 
> This is gonna be kind of weird?? And maybe kind of slow in the beginning I apologize, but I hope you think it picks up after the first section. 
> 
> This book is split up in four sections, and I will take a week break after each section so people have time to catch up on the word count. If my plans work, the trilogy should be over and done with by the end of the year, and I hope you guys decide to stick around. 
> 
> Come find me on twitter if you have any questions! @atumun15

**The Odd Daily**

 

The Outbreak Of The Unknown

_Hwang Hyunjin_

_July 9, 2018_

 

An international epidemic involving people with odd, inhuman abilities has struck the lives of people all over after a video went viral on Twitter just a few days ago.

 

On July 5, just four days ago, a video of a young teenage boy went viral after it depicted a scene of the teenager plunging into a tub of “holy water” and it “turning to steam before their very eyes.”

 

Witnesses of the scene described it as “unholy” and “demonic in every way,” before they burst into tears of horror. Never had they seen such a thing and they repeatedly spoke of the teenager as if he was the anti-christ himself.

 

His parents were similar in their responses, “He was on the brink of insanity when we got him to the church. It wouldn’t surprise me if he had been possessed by the devil, and if that’s the case… then there isn’t any hope left for him.”

 

However, this is not just a religious outbreak or a one-time event. Videos and reports of people with similar abilities such as freezing objects, shooting sparks out of their hands, and fire rolling off of their tongues have spiked in the last two days and police are working their hardest to get answers.

 

In light of all of this, police are looking for the teenage boy in hopes of finding answers, but are rounding up people with these strange abilities in the process out of fear.

 

Just yesterday, 25 people were rounded up in Seoul alone when they were believed to have possessed these strange abilities. Police have asked those who witness these people to not approach them and to call the police right away.

  
However, people are outraged by the rounding up and are fighting both court cases and police physically to let their friends and family go. “This is outrageous! We should not be acting so aggressively because we are scared!” a father of a young 5-year-old son taken from his classroom after demonstrating a certain ability claimed angrily.

 

Please stay safe in these rough times.

  
  
  


 

**_Section I_ **

**_“Guiding Light”_ **

 

**_“Cause even when there is no star in sight_ **

**_You'll always be my only guiding light”_ **

 

 

 

 

 

[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1084930182224461824)]


	2. SIGH NO MORE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Sigh no more, no more. One foot in the sea, one on shore. My heart was never pure. You know me, you know me.”

**May 2015**

 

Normality tiered as one of the most ironic parts of life. It varied from person to person, family to family, community to community, city to city, country to country, and world to world. Normality, in its rawest form, was normal, but not in the way one would think. See, it's not what’s linked to it, it's not how people should act or look like, and it’s not what cities should look like or how countries should be built. Normality was normal simply because everyone had it, everyone had this impossible set of standards that they put up every time they saw a face on the street or met someone new. Normality, that one exception put aside, was ironic because its standards were not normal. But that would be expected if you were to really look at society.

 

Just as normalities standards varied, so did the people in society. There are elders with bright smiles and traditional views of the world. There are older adults who claimed all day long that their views did not match their parents but were simply a slightly altered version of them. Young adults stressed over having their lives together but were becoming more diverse the more the world altered and changed. Teenagers, while believed to be nothing but a bunch of idiots who knew nothing about the world, had more simple and open-minded views compared to their parents who were raised on strict rules and regulations. Children remained happy and delighted but held a morbid fear for the world because they had grown up around nothing but violence against those who were slightly different from their own.

 

It is strangely difficult to put these into words as they all seem like nothing but absent-minded thoughts that will never matter to more than a select few, but when one begins to see the world for how it really is, the pain lessens. “Pain is temporary,” is a common phrase among students who are trying their best to make it past their exams while letting their health cripple, and while it may seem to be an unhealthy coping mechanism, it’s the only thing getting them through. Strictly so, the world is built on stereotypes that are very much real in some cases, but if one was to look past all of these and see someone for simply being human and having weird quirks or annoying habits, the world starts to become more... _colorful_. Easier to handle.

 

So, yeah. That blond cheerleader people see in movies who is supposedly the biggest bitch in school while dating the most popular guy there, that stuff happens, but is ultimately an overused character arc. What we don’t see behind all of that, is that the girl is perhaps a songwriter and has a very unstable way of handling emotions and needs help. Instead of seeing other’s flaws and milking them absolutely dry, humans should be able to take them and try their best to improve them so that person can be the best person they could be. Moreover, that doesn’t just go for that stereotype, but it applies to any and all. We all fit an image, a box people can check off in some shape, way, or form because that’s what we were trained to do.

 

And that’s okay.

 

The world is far too big, and far too vast for the boxes to not have counter boxes, though, and it’s time we began to see people for how they really are. That old lady screaming at kids earlier in the morning – she used to be a part of a biker gang. The homeless man that is presumed to be nothing but a low life druggie perhaps lost a kid and a good job that only a select few could have. That really, really smart kid in class who aces everything science and math-related could be learning guitar and failing terribly. The world is not perfect, but the world is not black and white either.

 

Take Seo Changbin for example. Strictly speaking, he was not a bad kid. He was well-mannered, did well in school, participated in extracurricular activities, even became the class president of his middle school at the ripe age of fourteen and standing proud. People liked him because he was nice and occasionally gave out free candy (with bible verses taped to them because his parents were trying to promote their church and the following of God, but the kids just tended to throw them out,) but there were still those upperclassmen or assholes in his class that treated him like gum on the bottom of their shoes because he was the preacher’s kid. The ironic part of it all was that Changbin never said anything. He never told a soul when a kid copied off his test or paid him to write an essay for them. Changbin didn’t tell anyone because he was far too kind than he should have been considering the treatment he received.

 

However, ignorance was bliss in this case because Changbin had no idea that there were kids who didn’t like him. He just assumed that was how they showed they liked someone like a boy tugging on a girl’s ponytail or ripping up her homework because that’s what he was taught along with anyone else. Though that belief was more or so tattooed into his brain because of his very strict parents. Changbin loved his parents; his mother was his practical therapist and his dad was his best friend. On the contrary… sometimes they got _mean_ , so aggressive that Changbin had bruises for weeks all over his body his parents refused to take care of. “God would heal them when it is time for you to be forgiven,” his mother said to him one time when a handprint sized bruise took over his right cheek when he was at the young age of 12, and Changbin believed it because this was his mother and he didn’t know any better.

 

It made Changbin upset when he was forced to think of his parents in any sort of negative light. He was taught that they were the best of the best, the ones that God looked down upon and loved unconditionally without another thought. They were devoted to their Lord, and Changbin couldn’t help but feel slightly unloved underneath the blissful, nonexistent touches of the god in the sky because there was no way he was as devoted as they were. He tried to be, he tried to be what his parents raised him to be, but Seo Changbin was as forgetful as he was loyal and sometimes he forgot to pray, to thank god for everything that’s been given to him and he hated it. His parents were not what God hated, but Changbin was. So, when a teacher pulled him aside to ask about the bruises on his faces and accused his parents of being abusive, Changbin screamed in her face about how his parents were the nicest people on the planet and didn’t deserve to be accused of such a horrid thing.

 

Changbin’s parents were relatively content with his intentions but upset with the way of going about it, so he was grounded for a month, not allowed to leave the house unless it was school or his parents were with him, and no art supplies. Changbin was allowed a bible and a journal, and a forehead kiss once a day. It was… _upsetting_ , but Changbin deemed it worth it because he defended his parent's honor and he could secretly see how content they were with his actions despite their own words. Changbin had failed to see their trickery and lies because he was naive and sheltered, and there was nothing anybody could do about it. All until Han Jisung came around and fucked everything up.

 

If there was one type of child that his parents refused to let Changbin be around, it was a kid like Han Jisung. The puffy cheeked boy with round glasses, shaggy hair, and clothes with holes in it was far too loud and obnoxious. He was known for always getting kicked out of class because he said the answer with a certain attitude or corrected teachers non stop. The kid was a powerhouse of knowledge and bubbliness, a hint of attitude in the way, and it was safe to say the two were complete opposites. Changbin was quiet, neat, and faithful to what he loved while Jisung was loud, slobbish, and could barely stick with an interest. The younger often got into a new hobby every other week, and perhaps that's where he got all of his knowledge about the world from. He was seemingly well experienced in just about everything, and that was scary considering he was only about 13.

 

The two first spoke to each other for the first time in all of their years of being in the same class when Changbin was 15 and Jisung was 14. At the time, Changbin had been handing out flyers for the school dance early the next month and was as innocent as he could be. As the student body president, Changbin was in charge of far too much in that godforsaken school for him just being a 15-year-old student, but he didn’t quite mind it. Changbin handled stress relatively well until it was far too overwhelming for him to comprehend it anymore and he always tried his best to do things for other people. Handing out flyers was such a small part of his tasks for that day, but became such a life-altering moment for him that day it was terrifying.

 

Unfortunately for him, it seemed to be only a bad life alter at the time because Han Jisung just had to come along and fuck absolutely everything up, “Hey there, Pres,” Jisung greeted innocently, Changbin’s smile faltering for only a split second in shock before it widened considerably.

 

“Hey, Jisung! You should consider going to the dance,” Changbin murmured, sliding a flyer smoothly into the younger’s hands and waiting anxiously for him to at least utter he’d consider it. Jisung’s eyes scanned the page, a mischevious glint sparkling in his eyes and Changbin tried his best to ignore the spark of anxiety in his stomach at the sight of it. It would be incredibly rude of him to assume such negative things about someone he knew nothing about. “The tickets are cheap this year because of funding and the theme this year has been vamped up a bit,” Changbin beamed right as Jisung’s eyes grazed over the extremely bad space pun at the bottom that made him cringe just a bit.

 

“I’m not sure, pres… sounds kinda lame,” Jisung trailed off teasingly, a smirk rising on his lips when Changbin’s smiled faltered, lessening but never quite going away completely. “Like… a space theme? Really? I mean it’s kind of an upgrade from last year’s sea theme but is it really much better? It seems really cliche,” Changbin tried his best not to let the words get to him. This was the first time they had ever spoken to each other in years and Jisung was just being so unnecessarily rude. “Though… if you’re open to better ideas, perhaps I could point you in the direction of a few I have in mind,” Jisung trailed off, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his uniform and rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet. Changbin felt like he was deflating a bit but he knew the student body tended to listen to Jisung quite a bit so shrugged.

 

“Sure. Yeah,” Changbin nodding, not really expecting for Jisung to smile widely, showing off the bright metallic of braces across his teeth before latching his hands into Changbin’s wrist with an iron grip. Changbin didn’t try and fight him off though, just going along with it and following Jisung off to a classroom towards the nearly abandoned part of campus. Changbin knew this part of the school was restricted to a good part of the lower classman, so to say the boy was a little more than concerned was a massive understatement. He didn’t want to be back here. “Jisung, this is a restricted area…” Changbin trailed off quietly, but he received nothing but snickers from the youngest Han member.

 

“Oh, come on, pres!” Jisung whined, turning back to face Changbin who had stopped abruptly without really saying anything more, “if it makes you feel any better, I have permission to be back here,” Changbin wasn’t sure how accurate that was, but chose not to question it too much. Changbin knew briefly of Jisung’s latest interest in music (and perhaps the longest interest he’s had gone onto two months) and a good portion of the music rooms were back here so perhaps he really did have permission. “Any more doubts?” Changbin has a few but stayed quiet. His heart beat a little quicker in fear when a Cheshire Cat-like grin spread over Jisung’s lips and a low, “Great,” slips out. It was only a matter of time before Jisung was gripping his wrist again and dragging him deeper into the abandoned wing of the school.

 

“Why do we have to go all the way back here?” Changbin questioned innocently, not expecting Jisung’s confident, mischevious exterior to deflate for a moment.

 

“My things are back here,” and then Changbin understood. He knew kids sometimes couldn’t afford to get the luxuries that came with this school, that not all were rich but were here on scholarship that paid for very little of the small things they could have here. Lockers back here were only given to the kids that were like that, and there was only a few of them. Changbin Just never really believed that Han Jisung was one of them. He didn’t exactly know why he was shocked. More times than not, Jisung came in with a dirty uniform that occasionally reeked of alcohol and had odd looking stains on them. Han Jisung was a popular student, but for all the wrong reasons. He didn’t party because no one invited him and he was known for occasionally hiking into the school website to vandalize it a bit. Han Jisung was the class prankster, all of them harmless, but no one dared to get on his bad side in fear of the pranks suddenly turning violent.

 

Strictly speaking, Han Jisung was not a bad kid, Changbin could see that from a mile away, but it would take a lot of work to bring out the good in him. “Oh,” Changbin uttered softly and just kept walking, realizing that Jisung had an impossible speed for his tiny legs and Changbin’s chest was starting to hurt at the work his small legs had to put in considering he wasn’t running, “Can we- Can we slow down?” Changbin panted, not really expecting Jisung to speed up, and tried his best to stop the whine threatening to escape past his lips. His feet were aching so much he could feel it in his knees, and his breath was turning cold and rigid. God, he was really out of shape, huh? “Jisung, please slow down,” Changbin pleaded, and when Jisung slowed down to his original pace, Changbin’s knees ached a little less and his breath got warm again.

 

“I thought you could handle a bit of speed, Pres? You’re on your feet all day it seems,” Jisung quirked an eyebrow up in question and Changbin just pouted innocently while shaking his head. “I’m surprised your grades are even so good considering you’re never in class,” Jisung admitted with a shrug, smirking to himself when Changbin bristled at the slight tease, “But I guess that comes with being the class president right? _You get special treatment,_ ” Changbin was not angry at the implication, no, he was fearful at the bitter tone Han Jisung had when he spat out the last part. Never had someone been so directly annoyed with him aside from his family, and it made Changbin’s lungs twist in panic. Even in elementary school, Changbin was well liked because his peers could step all over him as if he were a rug. Except that didn’t seem satisfying enough for Jisung.

 

“T-That’s not true -” Jisung laughed coldly at the sputtering of the elder, shaking his head before walking over to his locker to calmly open it and gather things inside. “I don’t get special treatment…” Changbin trailed off quietly, holding the stack of flyers in his hands a bit tighter and feeling his eyes travel down to his pristine school shoes. “I just have more responsibility…” Changbin trailed off again, flinching a bit when a finger came up to nudge against his chin harshly.

 

“No one ever said special treatment was a _bad_ thing,” Jisung hummed in a patronizing tone, and if Changbin was supposed to feel his heart flutter because Jisung did the thing that all guys do to girls in movies, then the world was a sin in itself because his parents did nothing but preach about how homosexuality was the worst sin of them all. Changbin gulped, taking a step back to get out of Jisung’s reach, but Jisung only took a step forward. This turned into one big game until Changbin’s back hit a door and Jisung was cornering him but never quite touching the class president. “Just as long as it’s not humiliating,” and then Jisung was reaching around to turn the nob of the door, slinging it open and shoving Changbin inside so he landed on his ass in the doorway.

 

 _Humiliating (adjective) - causing someone to feel ashamed and foolish by injuring their dignity and self-respect._ Changbin remembers learning about that word in the third grade when a girl got her shirt tugged down by a boy trying to see her panties and she screamed out a “You humiliated me!” afterward before shoving him down onto the ground. That day had to be the most memorable day of Changbin’s entire elementary school experience, and he still didn’t quite know _why_. He went home later that afternoon with question after question for his parents, most of them angrily questioning the guy that pulled her skirt down and why he did it, and that was the same day he learned consent too. It was ironic to think that despite learning them on the same day, they never went together because one doesn’t ask for consent when they humiliate a person. That’s not how life works.

 

However, he would only realize that after he was shoved down onto the ground and a lime green, almost radioactive-looking goo covered his entire head, shoulders, and thighs. It dripped down uncomfortably, warm and sticky, and Changbin felt like crying when the smell of it hit his nose and white and black bird feathers tumbled down to plant themselves in the green goo all over his body. Changbin hated how humiliated he felt. Society always claims that heartbreak or anger are the worst emotions to feel, but no one truly feels bad until they’re humiliated because humiliation lingers. Humiliation lasts for years and haunts you just as you’re trying to fall asleep. Humiliation never leaves and the mocking laughter of Han Jisung in the doorway as he doubled over and slapped his thighs would stay in Changbin’s brain for years to come.

 

“Holy shit, you should see your face, pres! That was so funny! How does it feel getting special treatment, hm?” Jisung wheezed, eyes glittering with so much mischief and humor that Changbin’s fists clenched in both anger and sadness. Changbin could feel his eyes getting glassy.

 

“I feel _humiliated_ ,” Changbin cracked, eyes focused on a certain thread in the floor his fingers itched to pull out. “And that’s bad special treatment,” Changbin fired, and Jisung grinned in pride.

 

“I’m glad you learned something from me, pres. Maybe I should be school president,” Jisung thought for a moment, pinching his chin in thought and Changbin felt his blood run cold. His mother would slap him for even thinking it but he did anyway, ‘ _Please no, this is all I have,_ ’ surely the lord above was more than disappointed in him for being so ungrateful and it really did take a lot in Changbin not to burst into tears right then and there. “You kind of look like a monster here, pres, I’m not gonna lie…” Jisung trailed off, eyes lighting up, “Perfect! A monster theme! Though, I guess you could just look in a school yearbook and not see any difference…” Jisung grinned from ear to ear and Changbin sucked in a harsh breath. Changbin was not angry, he was disappointed. He was disappointed in himself for not taking better care of his classmates.

 

“I’m sorry if I’ve ever made you feel unwanted or made myself out to be a monster…” Changbin apologized quietly, eyes boring into Jisung’s gobsmacked expression. Was this kid insane? Jisung thought to himself but kept his mouth shut.  Jisung simply threw the stack of papers on the ground and walked away with a shake of his head and a huff. Jisung did it because he wanted to. There was nothing that Changbin did to provoke him, and that’s what separated Jisung from everyone else. Jisung didn’t hate the world nor did he love it. Changbin watched him walk away with his heart sinking in his guilt-ridden chest because all Changbin could think was what he did wrong.

 

It took some time, but Changbin managed to lift himself off of the ground and carry himself down the hallway and into the bathroom. His uniform was ruined, he knew that much, so he tried his best to at least get most of the stain out. Using cold water and soap, a good portion of it came out of his uniform button up white shirt and black slick pants but the radioactive green still stood out greatly. Changbin pushed it aside so it could dry while he worked on getting it out from underneath his fingernails, off his face, and out of his hair. He didn’t get very far though, because the green goo had dried already and would not come out until he got home and had a good shower. Changbin stood there, gripping the edge of the sink in complete and utter _defeat_. “My lord, I’m so sorry… I’m so sorry if I did anything wrong… Please forgive me,” Changbin pleaded with a shaky voice but held his tears back, shoving them so deep inside he wasn’t sure if they’d ever even try and come out again. When Changbin got nothing in response, he slumped, “amen,” and then he was grabbing his shirt, putting it on despite still being wet.

 

The bell was threatening to ring at the time, and Changbin would not mess up his perfect track record because of another student, even if he deserved it. His lungs and knees burned but he didn’t care because he managed to just dart past the door when the bell rang. Changbin stood there for a moment, trying to catch his breath and let the ache die in his body, but it didn’t take long for his professor to come up behind him to nudge him inside, “Take a seat, Mr. Seo,” and Changbin didn’t hesitate to scurry off to his seat at the front of the class where everyone was watching him, studying his appearance as if he were some sort of circus show. But then Changbin had a thought and he quickly whirled around to face Dahyun who was sat behind him.

 

The girl stared at him, a little bewildered, but listened anyway, “I know we agreed on space but… how about a circus theme?” Changbin nibbled on his bottom lip in excitement, and Dahyun had never seen him look so excited about something. She couldn’t say no to that, besides it seemed like a good idea at the time.

 

“We’ll have to talk to the council about it, but I’m down,” Changbin grinned widely, showing off his slightly offset but still adorable canine teeth before whirling back around in his seat to pay attention in class. However, the small girl pulled out a sticky note, writing something down before slipping it into Changbin’s pocket. Changbin didn’t normally participate in passing notes but he figured it was pretty important if Dahyun of all people was passing him one. ‘What happened to you?’ was written inside and Changbin double checked if the professor was looking at him before scribbling down a dismissive response and a poor, poor excuse of what actually happened to him. Changbin didn’t quite remember what he wrote but it was basically a lunch gone wrong situation and passed it back to her as discreetly as he could manage. She seemed dissatisfied with the answer but didn’t push it.

 

Dahyun was Changbin’s best friend. Well, at least for him, but he didn’t know if it was quite the same on her end. They had grown up together, their parents being best friends and that ultimately forced them to be good friends, but Dahyun was socially popular. She had tons of friends that could spend more time with her than Changbin could, yet she stayed with him anyway and he couldn’t be more thankful. However, her note was slipped into his pocket again, and Changbin felt himself grow with anxiety. He really needed to pay attention but what if Dahyun had something important to say? So, he opened it and much to his slight disappointment, it did nothing but ask if Changbin wanted her to walk down with him to the office to get another uniform, so he did nothing but turn back to her, nod once, and then whirled back around again.

 

After that, Changbin tried his best to ignore the fact that he was stinking up the entire room and focus on his studies to the best of his abilities. Though he cringed every time a kid sneezed, coughed, or covered their nose when they had to walk past him, and Changbin sunk down in his seat. This was so _embarrassing_.  Though the bell rung and Changbin was dismissed from his class, now having to endure walking through the hallway but Dahyun held him back, “Mr. Seo and Ms. Kim, can I help you?” Their professor uttered when he realized they were still in his classroom. He didn’t seem annoyed or inconvenienced, just confused.

 

“Professor Choi, would you mind if we hung out in here until the bell rings? I don’t want Changbin to be traumatized walking down the hallway in the state he’s in…” Dahyun trailed of sweetly, offering their professor a beaming smile before his eyes flickered between his two students. Professor Choi looked at Changbin, nose scrunched up and a frown on his lips.

 

“Ah yes… Mr. Seo, if I may ask, what happened to you?” Professor Choi hushed with worry creasing in his brow, but Changbin just offered him a soft, reassuring smile and a shake of his head.

 

“I had an accident at lunch, Professor. No need to worry,” Changbin insisted with that charming smile that won over any and everyone, and while Professor Choi didn’t seem entirely convinced, he didn’t push any further and instead nodded in confirmation, “Thank you,” Changbin uttered with a soft voice as the professor nodded and went back to grading his papers. Dahyun tried her best to start a conversation with Changbin but he was far too caught up in his own thoughts to hold one of them through, flinching a bit when the loud beep over the intercom echoed in his ears, “Guess we should get going…” Changbin trailed off, stopping when Professor Choi called out to him.

 

“Do you need me to write you two a note?” Dahyun just waved him off.

 

“We should be fine. I’ll ask the office for one,” The girl explained before dragging Changbin out of the room and down the hall. “You haven’t used your free extra uniform this term yet have you?” Dahyun inquired hopefully, and thankfully, Changbin shook his head. “Good, this should be an easy process then,” Dahyun murmured and all Changbin could do was hum in confirmation. He didn’t know why his head was stuck on the guilt he felt when Jisung pushed him in that room and pulled this on him. He couldn’t imagine how tainted Jisung was on the inside, and he just wanted to help him. That’s why he didn’t turn him in that day, and all Jisung could wonder was why he didn’t get called to the office, why he didn’t get one last final warning before he pulled the biggest prank of the century and finally got expelled from that _damn_ school.

 

Changbin wasn’t a snitch. Point blank period.

 

“Hey, what can I do for you?” The receptionist smiled brightly when the class president and class vice president walked through the office doors, but her smile faltered at the sight of Changbin. “Oh dear, what happened?” She gasped, flickering her eyes between her daughter, and her best friend. Changbin smiled shyly, shuffling his feet absentmindedly.

 

“I had an accident at lunch… can I cash in my free uniform card?” Changbin inquired, but the lady nodded before he was even finished with his statement, standing up to grab him by the shoulder gently and guide him towards the back of the office and towards guidance counseling. “Hey, Mr. Lee,” Changbin waved at the principal that walked past them, and he was sipping on his coffee at the time, nearly choking on it when he realized what Changbin looked like.

 

“Mercy, boy, what happened?”

 

“Lunch mishap,” Dahyun butted in bluntly, tired of having the same set of dialogue over and over again, but the man just hummed in acknowledgment, getting out of the three’s way, “Mom, can we get pizza after church tonight?” Dahyun yawned, stretching out when they stopped briefly as her mother filled out Changbin’s free uniform papers. Dahyun’s mother hummed in thought for a moment.  

 

“Sure, hon. Changbin, do you want to come over afterward?” The woman offered, Dahyun’s eyes lighting up as she turned to her best friend, nodding vigorously. Changbin wasn’t entirely sure if his parents would let them considering he had homework, but he figured he could try and get it done during their free time at bible study tonight.

 

“I’ll ask!” Changbin beams and Dahyun squeals, pulling Changbin into far too tight of a hug and Changbin groans dramatically. “Noona,” Changbin whined, trying to shove her away but she was stronger than Changbin to a certain degree so stayed latched on like a leech until Changbin’s new uniform was forced into his hands, “Noona, I have to change!” Changbin screeched, dragging them across the carpeted floor of the bathroom, managing to escape her grip and fall into the safety of the bathroom while she laughed loudly.

 

“Hon, stop terrorizing the boy. Come help me with these boxes,” and Dahyun groaned before walking away, leaving Changbin in peace. It felt nice to be in actual clean clothes considering he had sat in nothing but soured clothes for nearly two hours. “Dear, do you want some cologne?” Dahyun’s mom’s voice inquired from outside the door and he thought for a moment. He was pretty sure he had some in his bag, so dug around.

 

“Erm,” Changbin trailed off, to let her know he was listening as he dug around in his gym bag, brightening when he found his bottle he kept in his bag. “I have some!” he exclaimed and the woman just hummed in acknowledgment, letting the boy be. Soon, he was relatively freshened up, and walked out in fresh clothes and slightly damp hair. Dahyun snickered at the sight, getting up from her seat to straighten out his hair as her mother wrote something down on a slip of paper.

 

“Alright, here’s your note. Hurry up and get to class, you two,”

 

Changbin felt like he should have told someone, but sometimes, he’s really glad he didn’t, especially when he saw the distraught look on Jisung’s face one afternoon after class when he thought no one was watching. Changbin didn’t know how long Jisung waited there, if or when he went home, but he didn’t dwell on it out of slight anger. Jisung seemingly didn’t know his boundaries that afternoon, having made paper friends out of his damn homework assignments and Changbin had to meekly ask for extra copies during lunch from very annoyed teachers. On the contrary, Jisung was having a day where he didn’t know right from wrong and just assumed that Changbin would enjoy a nice little gift from him. However, despite Changbin’s anger, he never snitched and Jisung was becoming increasingly frustrated.

 

That’s why he sat on the bench outside the campus library, moping and staring off into the distance as he angrily snapped the rubber band around his wrist that no doubt drew blood just from how aggressive a few strikes were and not even considering how frequent they were either. He sat there for two hours after school let out when finally an elderly man with a hunched back and a slow drag to his feet like a bear approached Jisung and sat down on the bench next to him. They didn’t even greet each other, Jisung laying his head on his grandfather’s shoulder and letting himself slump and lean on something for once in his life. “Bad day?” Woohyun, Jisung’s grandfather, questioned with a hum, and all Jisung could Do was shrug pathetically. “It’s okay, my boy,” he patted the top of his head gently and Jisung felt like sobbing.

 

“Can we have tomato paste and rice tonight?” Jisung asked innocently, causing his grandfather to laugh light heartedly. They didn’t have much, not even from the start, but this is what Jisung grew up on and it was his greatest comfort food. “We don’t even have to use the good brand,” Jisung added on with a tiny whine and a pout, no doubt making the older man coo.

 

“Let’s add some beef into it, hm?” Jisung’s eyes lit up at that, but his expression was pulled into that of a questioning one. “I’m feeling a bit risky tonight,” Woohyun bumped Jisung’s shoulder with his own and Jisung could do nothing but breathe in amusement. His grandfather was his best friend, his guardian, his guide in this god forsaken world, and knew Jisung like a clock that he invented himself. “Come on, help your old man up. His back isn’t feeling too well,” Woohyun coaxed, hands out and waiting patiently for his son to tug on them so he could get up a bit easier. Jisung frowned at the comment, but helped his grandfather nonetheless.

 

“Papaw… are you sure you don’t want me to start working?” Jisung inquired with a frown but Woohyun waved him off.

 

“Don’t worry so much, my boy. I’ll be just fine. Just focus on staying in school,” and that was it. Jisung breaks down into tears because he’s trying his best to get out of the school his grandfather worked his ass off to get Jisung into And he was just throwing it all away. “Oh dear, Sung why are you crying?” Woohyun panicked, bringing the young, teenage boy into his chest and rubbing circles into his back. Jisung just sobbed, clutching at the tattered shirt on his grandfather’s back and crying a bit harder. Jisung kept muttering our apologies Woohyun could barely understand but managed to anyway. “Why are you sorry?” Woohyun muttered, stroking his grandson’s hair soothingly But Jisung just shook his head.

 

“I’m so ungrateful for everything you do for me, I’m so sorry,” Jisung admitted through tears only made Woohyun hug him tighter. Woohyun figured that at one point or another, Jisung had been ungrateful, but what human wasn’t? Woohyun knew that this world was hard to grow up in Because a kid is pulled into the future by his peers but forced back into the past by fear ridden adults. “You’ve taught me so much, helped me control myself and keep it hidden so I can be normal,” Jisung cried out.

 

“My boy, This power only awakens in those truly angry at the world. The need for change has to be strong enough that it changes something inside of you as well,” Woohyun hushed into his grandson’s hair. “Fear and control is what keeps us strong and alive,” and then they were walking back home, Jisung clutching the straps of his backpack tightly and kicking a stray pebble occasionally. It wasn’t uncommon for Jisung’s head to be stuck up in the clouds dreaming of a better life, of a life where his dad didn’t die and his mother didn’t lose her mind. Jisung dreamed of a life where his grandfather could stay home and write however much he wanted without having to worry about money and his mother wasn’t stuck in a government based asylum with special metal shackles around her wrists that kept the strongest, most controlled part of her body at bay. He wouldn’t have headaches everytime he had to interfere in the speed of the world or have to worry about keeping it hidden in fear of suffering the same fate his mother and so many others like him had to.

 

In Jisung’s world, he would be normal. “You and that head of your’s is always up in the clouds. I’m beginning to worry you’ll never come back down to Earth,” Woohyun’s voice broke through the quiet of the walk and through the wall separating Jisung from the real world. The young teenager snapped out of it, hopping down from the small bench he had been walking across and joining his grandfather’s side once more, “What are you thinking about?” He inquired with a small smile as they approached the small corner store at the end of the block. Jisung stayed quiet for a moment, battling internally if he should tell his grandfather or not, but decided yeah, maybe he should. He told him everything anyway.

 

“I wish I could do something to make this situation better. I wish I could make so much money you didn’t have to work so much and I wish I could go back in time and just…. _Change everything,_ ”  Jisung breathed out, eyes trained on the ground because he was too ashamed to look his grandfather in the eye. Perhaps if he had, he would have realized Woohyun gazed at him in understanding, not as if Jisung was insane. “I know you always tell me that I shouldn’t wish to change the past so much because it doesn’t help anything, but sometimes I can’t help it. Especially when you come home and you can barely stand once you sit down or when you have to give up your breakfast so I can get a healthy one and-” Jisung stopped, eyes glassy and lips wobbling. ‘ _Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry,_ ’ chanted in his head over and over again but what was Jisung to do? He was always bad at holding in his emotions.

 

Jisung felt his grandfather link arms with him after patting his shoulder lovingly, “Sometimes it’s nice to dream, I get it, Sung,” Jisung nodded his head, “But other times, you have to make the future better first. If you… If you wish to get a job, you can, but don’t overwork yourself and put your studies first, do you understand?” Jisung nodded his head frantically, hugging his grandfather suddenly and catching him completely off guard. The older man made a grunting noise, but eventually patted Jisung’s head before nudging him away. “Now stop delaying, boy! Home!” He called out with a grunt, nudging Jisung forward and making sure the teenager was moving and stuck in reality instead of his own head.

 

The walk back was always long and interesting as they never had enough money to buy bus tickets and people just loved to judge them for just about anything when they were traveling to the off side of town where drug dealers were in their prime and the homeless rate was at it’s worst. Seeing groups of them hang outside stores was something Jisung saw a lot, but it would never be something he got used to, especially during the winter and the sun was beginning to go down. Jisung was thankful that he was able to live in a small bunker-like home just outside of a tall record store, even if their heat didn’t work and more times than not they had to run down to the free, 24-hour gym down the street to shower or brush their teeth, but at least he wasn’t out in the rain and at risk of getting so sick he died.

 

Point is, people on the rich side of town didn’t treat people like Jisung and his grandfather from the other side kindly because they thought they knew what it was like to be like them. They were nothing but a stick on the ground for the rich folk, and sometimes they liked to snap the sticks in half. “Morning, Mrs. Kim,” Woohyun bowed politely in her direction, offering the middle aged woman a small smile that she returned with a snarl and a scoff. Mrs. Kim was the owner of a well-known jewelry company that her great grandmother had built from the ground up, and while the origins of the place said hardship, it was safe to say that Mrs. Kim hadn’t worked with her hands a day in her damn life, “Fine afternoon don’t you think?” Woohyun hummed again, smirking to himself when she did nothing but bring out a cigarette and light it up. Jisung stepped back a bit when she blew smoke in his direction.

 

“Sure, Mr. Han,”  She muttered out of boredom, the breeze flowing through outside the tall, fancy building and causing everyone to shiver. Though when Woohyun attempted to continue the conversation, Mrs. Kim bristled and growled out a low, “Mr. Han, if you’re not going to buy anything I’ll have to ask you to leave,” And then Jisung was tugging on his grandfather’s arms trying to get him to leave before they got arrested and Woohyun left with a wave and a small smile.

 

“Papaw, why do you always insist on being nice to her? She’s nothing but rude to us,” Jisung questioned out of nothing but a slightly angry shock. He would never understand why his grandfather went out of his way to be kind to someone who Jisung believed didn’t deserve it but things like that weren’t so simple.

 

“Because you never know when they might need it, Jisung,” and Jisung pouted in thought. Mrs. Kim hadn’t always been so cruel. Sure, she had an attitude from the very beginning, but it only got worse after her husband had an affair and her 6-year-old son had gone missing. Jisung remembers the day he was pronounced dead after they found his body mangled and beaten in the abandoned shack of a man that had been kidnapping kids for years, raping them and killing them when he got bored. It still made him to sick to his stomach thinking about it, especially considering he was still alive.

  


“Yeah… I guess you’re right,” Jisung trailed off shyly, stuffing his hands into his pockets and fidgeting nervously.

 

“You look like you need to let time slow for a while…” Woohyun murmured, and while it was true, Jisung didn’t want to deal with the repercussions of it. The headaches could last for weeks based on how long he goes, and some things start to warp and mesh together if he’s not careful and - there’s far too much responsibility behind what he has to deal with. “What’s got you so hesitant to do so?” Woohyun inquired out of curiosity mixed with concern.

 

“I don’t know if the headaches are worth the time to breathe. It just kind of defeats the purpose,” Jisung admits, shoulders slumping and lips pulled into a pout. Woohyun hummed in understanding and the two carried on until they reached their small home at the edge of town. Jisung followed his grandfather down the small set of stairs to their door, one hand out to catch him in case the old man goes stumbling, but Woohyun stayed upright on his feet, sliding the key into the finicky lock and opening it with a grunt and a shove of his shoulder. He was quick to usher Jisung in and shut the door so none of the warm air inside escaped and was replaced by the icy cold outside. “Do you need me to do anything before I go work on homework?” Jisung breathed out, looking around their rather messy home and sighing a bit. He really needed to clean.

 

“I’ve got it. I’ll bring you some tea soon,” Woohyun waved the boy off, and Jisung turned to his left to escape past the green curtain with little aliens all over it hung up to serve as some sort of door or privacy wall between his tiny, tiny room and the kitchen. His grandfather had the same, but he had an old tan curtain with black ink writing all over it. Jisung was quick to close it, clasping it around the hooks on the walls either side and climbing up the latter into his top bunk, beneath was his desk and a tall bookcase with small shelving stood proudly at the end of Jisung’s bed in the small hole it could fit in. Everything was shoved up against the back wall so it didn’t feel so cramped but Jisung still felt a bit suffocated at times. Jisung fell face first into the soft pillow and pulled the blanket around his shoulders, uniform jacket, tie, and shoes, and backpack long discarded.

 

Jisung didn’t fall asleep, he knew better than to try and nap this late into the afternoon, but he did allow himself to slip into the state between realms where everything stopped and everything felt a lot easier. Here Jisung was allowed to breathe for a while, and most of the time he didn’t even realize he was doing it until it was too late to slip back out were repercussions wouldn’t affect him that bad. “Only for a few minutes, Jisung,” Jisung whispered to himself, but a few minutes turned into a few hours when he decided to get up and start cleaning. He figured he could get away with helping around the house for a bit, even if it would drain him completely by the time he finished his homework and came out of the time warp state.

 

That didn’t stop him though, he simply cleaned until the house was nearly spotless, climbed back up in bed, and slipped back into reality. His whole body felt weak, far too weak for him to even try and get up, and Woohyun must have realized what had happened because he came back to Jisung’s room with a bowl of rice, a bottle of water, and a laptop tucked under his arm. “Thank you for cleaning, but I wish you wouldn’t do it while you’re in that state,” Woohyun thanked, but it was obvious he was concerned for Jisung’s well being when he saw how pale he was. His cold, wrinkled and gnawed hand gingerly feeling his grandson’s forehead and frowning, “You’ve drained yourself too much. You’re not going to school tomorrow,”

 

“Papaw -” Jisung tried to argue but Woohyun glared in his direction.

 

“Don’t give me any lip. If you overwork yourself, your heart could give out, do you hear me?” Woohyun snapped, and Jisung nodded vigorously, not wanting to piss off his grandfather even more. Jisung sat up, took the bowl of rice and water bottle from his grandfather’s waiting hands and settled them in little valleys of his blankets. “Here. It has one of the movies you haven’t watched in it already,” Woohyun informed as he passed the fully charged laptop his grandson's way and Jisung squealed in excitement. Jisung _loved_ movies but didn’t get to watch them very often so it was always excitable when he was actually able to. “It’s an action movie. I think it’s about hackers or something,” Woohyun frowned as he looked at the movie case.

 

Jisung plucked it from his grandfather’s fingers and studied the front. There was a guy in the middle with two guys standing dramatically behind him and Jisung was slightly intrigued because it looked like a really shit movie if he were honest, “Sigh no more…” Jisung trailed off in interest, smiling his grandfather’s way, “Thanks, Papaw,” Jisung thanked with a grin, and the man said nothing as he patted the side of the bed and left the room, placing the curtains back on their hooks. Jisung maneuvered so he was comfortably placed in the corner of his bed, pants discarded and nothing but an undershirt covering his torso, back against the wall, laptop propped up on a pillow, bowl of rice in his lap, and water bottle tucked between the wall and his hip. When Jisung was finally comfortable, he hit play on the laptop and watched with mild intrigument.

 

In retrospect, it was a really bad movie. So bad, it was almost funny. The acting was terrible, the filming was absolutely poor considering the time it came out, and the overall writing seemed to lack effort. However, Jisung was hooked on one particular character. He was the guy on the left on the cover and was an amazingly good hacker and seemed to be the only slightly sane one in this absolute bullshit of a movie. Jisung considered it for a moment, considered what he was capable of and it felt like a light bulb went off in his head. Jisung was a good hacker or a decent one at the very least, but he hadn’t ever considered hacking into bank accounts and getting money…

 

It wasn’t exactly legal or ethical… but perhaps it was worth a shot?

 

He couldn’t tell his grandfather about it, and he’d have to work out all the kinks but for once in Han Jisung’s life, he felt useful. He finally felt like he could help his grandfather by doing more than just clean or focus on his studies. Those dreams and wishes that soured through his head would never be fully fulfilled, he knew that much, but Jisung could focus on the future now, focus on what was really important, and if perhaps he went straight to the school library when he went back in search of anything that could possibly help him, his grandfather didn’t know it. But all the books were so daunting and he didn’t even know where to _start_. “Uh… You need help with anything?” A voice chimed from behind Jisung, causing him to yelp in startlement.

 

Behind him was a younger boy with bright eyes and slightly taller than Jisung. “Erm…” Jisung trailed off, eyes flickering back to the books on the shelf because _damn_ was this boy pretty. The library assistant laughed a bit and Jisung gulped at the sound of it, praying to the heavens above that his cheeks weren’t obviously crimson. “You have any books on coding?” Jisung scratched the back of his neck shyly and the librarian’s eyebrows shot up in slight surprise. _Fuck that was cute_. Jisung had to pinch his own side to get him to snap out of it.

 

“Han Jisung, our famous school hacker, _checking out a book about coding?_ ” Jisung’s head pivoted up, eyes locking on the ceiling as an amused, shy groan slipped past his lips. “What are you up to, Jisung?” The librarian crossed his arms over his chest, a glitter of amusement in his eyes and Jisung felt like all the air had been sucked out of his lungs at the sight of it. He knew people were beautiful, but it had to be illegal for this boy to be standing in front of him with a face most likely sculpted by the gods themselves.

 

“It’s for an after school thing. I’m trying to hone my skills, you know?” Jisung managed to get out, wiggling his fingers like he was typing on a keyboard like a damn loser and he’s pretty sure his voice cracked and some words got repeated while his face heated up, but that wasn’t important at the time. What _was_ important was the librarian laughing fondly, nodding his head, and waving for Jisung to follow him and just how fucking cute it was. Until Jisung realized that the librarian knew who he was without Jisung knowing his name and that made him deflate slightly. He would get that damn name out of him, “So, uh, what’s your name?” Jisung got out smoothly, much to his own surprise and relief, and the librarian hummed in thought as if he were weighing his options of actually telling Jisung or not.

 

“Why do you want to know?” What the fuck was he supposed to say to that? That he thought the librarian was cute and that he wanted to doodle his name in his notebook during history? “How am I supposed to know you won’t hack into my bank account and steal all of my money?” Jisung gulped at that, eyes widening in slight horror because fuck was he being too obvious about asking about the coding book? Of course, people would think he was going to take it up a notch if they already knew he was a proficient hacker.

 

“I-Erm-” Jisung stuttered, eyes flickering down to the ground and a blush coating his cheeks. The thing about Han Jisung was that he was unbearably incapable of dealing with confrontation, and this just had to be the worst situation he had been shoved into because this boy was just so pretty but saw right through Jisung. So, he ran. He ran right out of that library like a damn fool and didn’t look back once, especially when the librarian called after him a few times. Jisung would never be able to show his face in that library again it looked like, and he didn’t care if he was being dramatic. That was _embarrassing_ , how was he supposed to take himself seriously after that?

 

Classes after that carried on too slowly for him to _not_ speed it up a bit, and by the time it was last block, Jisung’s head was killing him and blood was practically threatening to drip out of his nose. If anything, Jisung was just ready to go home and curl up into a ball and cry for a few hours just because he wanted to, but before he could leave, a soft hand curled around his wrist and tugged him backward. Jisung felt like slipping 6 feet under when he saw the librarian from this morning hovering over him. “Hey, you ran off before you could get your book,” The librarian smiled sweetly, handing out a book with a rough bind but good bones. The front cover was black but had ‘the art of deception’ written multiple times all over it.

 

“Oh… erm, thank you,” Jisung took the book from the librarian’s hands and clutched it to his chest shyly.

 

“You’re welcome,” The librarian beamed with that damn smile and Jisung felt weak at the knees. He met this boy this morning and he was already whipped. “Eric,” The librarian stuck out his hand, waiting for Jisung to shake it. Jisung didn’t know this at the time, but Eric found Jisung’s sweaty palms equally gross as they were endearing and couldn’t help but let out a low chuckle. “Listen, if you need a place to just… _practice_ , the library down the road is hiring. I could put in good word for you,” Eric shrugged nonchalantly and the next thing Jisung said would most certainly haunt him for the rest of his life.

 

“Are you an angel or something?” It took a few seconds for Jisung to register what he had said, but as soon as he did, he buried his face into his hands and groaned loudly, “I’m so sorry,” Jisung apologized, cheeks on fire and the need to curl up into a ball and cry for a while only strengthened considerably. Though Jisung hadn’t expected Eric’s hands to come up and pull the hands covering his face away with a light laugh and a fond smile.

 

“Don’t worry about it. You’re not the first one,” That made Jisung sag in relief a little bit, but he also felt a bit deflated because all shots he had have officially been thrown out the window and weren’t coming back. All his power moves had been fucked up and now Jisung didn’t know if there was even a point. “Can I get your number?” Eric requested casually, but Jisung gulped, flickering his eyes down to the ground.

 

“Sorry… erm, I don’t have a phone,” Jisung admitted with a hand coming up to rub the back of his neck nervously but Eric only deflated a bit before he offered Jisung a small smile.

 

“That’s okay. It would probably be better to get to know you in person so we at least know we can hold a conversation, right?” Eric questioned with that same smile and it was kind of a miracle Jisung was still stood up straight and not a puddle on the damn floor. “Anyways, you should stop by the library tomorrow morning and we can discuss you getting a job over some coffee,” Eric hushed, and Jisung nodded vigorously. “I’ll see you later, Jisung,”

 

“Y-yeah. See you, Eric,” Jisung waved in his direction as the younger walked off and out of the school, leaving Jisung stood there in a daze. He didn’t even realize he was stood there for way longer than he needed to be until a voice spoke up behind him and startled him for the second time that day.

 

“Um… You’re blocking the door,” Jisung whirled around to see Seo Changbin behind him, two heavy looking boxes in his arms.

 

“Oh.. hey, pres. Need a hand?” Changbin looked uneasy by the question, but nodded his head nonetheless and let Jisung grab the box on top. “Where we heading?” Jisung inquired, following Changbin out the front entrance and towards the back where the gymnasium and the workout rooms were.

 

“The gym. Have to start setting up for the dance tomorrow night,” Changbin informed, setting the boxes down by the entrance, pulling a set of keys out from his pocket to unlock the large door. Once it was opened and being held open by a set of bricks, Jisung and Changbin carried the remaining boxes inside and Jisung watched Changbin set them down with a grunt and slight panting.

 

“Are there move boxes?”

 

“Yeah, but it’s fine. Go ahead and go home, Jisung,” Changbin uttered, kneeling down to open the plastic boxes to start taking out the directions inside.  


“Ah, come on, pres. I don’t have anywhere to be and I feel like being useful today,” Jisung beamed, snorting a bit internally when he saw the blank look Changbin was sparing him.

 

“I’m not sure I trust you after the past few weeks…” Changbin trailed off wearily, but Jisung just shook his head.

 

“Truce?” Jisung stook out his hand, because for once… he thinks it might be okay to make a truce with somebody, especially the class president who might be able to help him later. And for Changbin, he really didn’t have a reason not to shake it. He was getting really tired of the constant pranks and he just wanted some peace, especially since exams were coming up soon. So, Changbin took his hand with an iron grip, and it felt like maybe this was the start of something great.

 

“Truce.”

 

 

[[MOODBOARD]](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1087404032715575297)


	3. THE CAVE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "So come out of your cave walking on your hands
> 
> and see the world hanging upside down,"

**November 2016**

 

_Everything was quiet in volume but loud physically. Chaos was breaking out all around him, houses, churches, stores, and people were on fire, collapsing to the ground when their bones give out on them and the once bright sky was covered in thick, smokey clouds that created a dark aura around him. Changbin’s eyes flickered down to his hands where fire licked at his palms but never left the outer ring of his wrist and fingers unless Changbin commanded it to. Did he do this? Changbin’s vision lifted up in a slow, shaky drawl and in front of him was a figure. Changbin couldn’t hear a damn thing, not even the pumping of his own heart or the crackle of the fire licking at his toes from where a body laid next to his feet, burning to a crisp and the skin melting off like in thick clumps._

 

_Changbin couldn’t hear anything, but he could hear the breathing of this figure ahead and the incomprehensible whispers leaving their lips. Timid steps toward the figure seemed to be the bad option, as Changbin jumped back suddenly when a flaming phone pole fell to the ground. It wasn’t clear where Changbin was until that moment, and he would pay a shit ton of money just to figure out why it had taken him so long to figure out he was downtown in his hometown, the town he loved oh so dearly and planned to live in for the rest of his days. But he would pay even more money to figure out why he had been the one to burn it all down._

 

_Thick, scratchy fog burned both Changbin’s throat and eyes, sputtering coughs escaping past his lungs as he inhaled a thick cloud of smoke that added his lungs to the list of burning organs. “Wait!” Changbin called out when he saw the figure turn around and walk away, but Changbin shuddered when a deep, thundering voice boomed down from the clouds and rattled the Earth beneath him. ‘Control’ it said and Changbin repeated after it, “Control?” The voice did not answer back. Changbin looked back down at the flaming phone poll with a look of desperation, “Please,” Changbin’s voice cracked, and as if the fire around him took pity, it moved away from the middle of the phone poll and gave Changbin enough room to climb over without burning himself. He didn’t know this at the time, but it really wasn’t because he could burn himself, but a start to his skills._

 

_The figure was still in sight and with a sputtering cough, Changbin shoved himself forward and began to run against the pavement, “Wait! Please! Come back!” Changbin shouted out in desperation, but he stopped short in his tracks when Mr. Choi’s flower shop collapsed next to him on the street, and Changbin was beginning to hear everything around him now. “Fuck!” Changbin darted towards, not quite sure what he was planning on doing but right when he was about to enter, the figure appeared and shoved him so roughly backward, he landed on his back. Changbin gasped at the sudden pressure, feeling like his body made a dent in the pavement beneath him but he was more focused on the hooded figure above him. Changbin couldn’t see their face. He couldn’t see anything outside of their clothes. Their hands were covered by thick, black gloves, shoes and jeans spotless and the hoodie the figure had on was pulled over his head. The only characteristic Changbin could make out was the silver hair tuffs sticking out from underneath the hood._

 

 _“_ **_Control_ ** _,” The figure thundered with much more force but their aggression stayed neutral. Changbin could feel tears rising in his eyes from the fear of everything around him. “_ **_Get up,_ ** _” The voice thundered again, and it took a few seconds for Changbin to scramble up but he managed to get back up on his feet. When he stood up, the figure wasn’t where he was originally, and Changbin whirled back around and saw him standing in the distance by the end of the strip. Changbin approached him with hesitant footsteps, but everything around him became warped and his body went flying forward until he was stood in front of the figure. Changbin gulped when their hand hooked around his throat and forced him to swivel around. The figure practically held him in a headlock, and Changbin shuddered when he could feel lips ghosting his ear._ _This was wrong_ _. “_ **_Look at what you’ve done. Look at what your lack of self-control has done to the city you love so much,_ ** _” The voice murmured in his ear. The figure wasn’t angry, he wasn’t showing aggression, but instead showing a soft passion that Changbin didn’t quite know how to describe._

 

_“I didn’t do this. I don’t- This wasn’t me- I can’t do this-” Changbin stammered out, panting and his vision became blurry. It was obvious that he was having a panic attack right then and there but the figure made hushing noises in his ear, gripping his shoulder firmly with the hand that was previously on his throat and giving Changbin a sense of security, “I couldn’t have....” Changbin whimpered, falling to his knees and looking all around him. The figure followed him, pressing their chest against Changbin’s back and letting their icy breath cool down the side of his neck._

 

 _“_ **_Oh, but you did. Look down at your hands,_ ** _” The figure ordered, placing their palm on the back of Changbin’s head and pivoting it downwards so he was staring down at his palms. Changbin gasped at the sight. Before he had seen the flames but there was nothing in the lines in which they danced. Now, he could see images, scenes, memories of what had happened before and it was all him. He knew because of the rings on his fingers, because of the scar going along the inside of his thumb from where he got bit by his small dog when he was little. Changbin tried his best to will it away, but the more he tried, the more hysterical he became. It had taken the figure slipping their hands down so they were intertwined with Changbin’s to put out the flames. And when their hands separated, strange symbols were burned into the skin of his palms and Changbin could only watch in horror as the figure whispered in his ear._

 

 _“_ **_Control yourself,_ ** _”_ Jisung shrieked suddenly, “Eric!” Jisung giggled at the ticklish kisses at his necks and the dancing fingers along his sides. It was late at night, Eric and Jisung cuddled up in the top bunk in Jisung’s bedroom, Jisung trying his best to sleep with his back facing his boyfriend in protest, but Eric had other plans. “Please! We’re going to wake up papaw!” Jisung whined in a whisper, yelping suddenly when a particularly sharp jab came at his side, but that seemed to calm Eric down considerably. However, the younger’s arm curled around Jisung’s waist to pull him back down to the bed and Jisung felt his breath hitch in his throat when Eric hovered his face over his own and pulled him into a soft kiss.

 

Jisung’s fingers curled into his hair, humming pleasantly when Eric added a bit more pressure. Though before Jisung could push forward and deepen it by adding a bit of tongue, Eric pulled away and settled his head on the elder’s chest. “We’re not going to wake him. The old man sleeps as hard as a rock anyway,” Eric murmured, keeping his voice just above a whisper in that low hum that made Jisung’s heart pump erratically. Jisung rolled his eyes but he knew it was true. Papaw had a hard time waking up nowadays, and Jisung knew it was because he was becoming too invested in his dream world and perfecting it before his body finally gave out. Papaw was practically inventing his own afterlife at this point. “So,” Eric laughed, swirling a finger along Jisung’s bicep, “what’s the next game plan?” The question was bubbly and excitable but Jisung could do nothing but shrug.

 

“I took a lot of money tonight. I’ll have to hang on the down low until Younghyun can launder it all,” Jisung explained, running his fingers through Eric’s soft hair and felt a weird chill go up his spine when Eric frowned at that. Originally, Jisung had only planned for his hacking to be a one-man job, that’s how it had been at first at least, but after a few times, Eric had gotten involved and now they were a team of two with an older brother willing to launder the money for him. Jisung hadn’t talked to Younghyun much after he left, but with Younghyun basically being a human lie detector, he found out pretty quickly into what was supposed to be a five-minute conversation that quickly turned into a 2-hour monster. “Don’t worry so much, angel. Sometimes we need to just sit and breathe and be normal for a change,”

 

“It’s hard for people like us to be normal…” Eric murmured. Almost as if on cue, Eric’s fingertips became unbearably cold and ice began to form underneath his nails, “What normal person is able to shoot ice shards out of their fingertips?” Eric mumbled out in despair, but Jisung was quick to intertwine their fingers, despite how cold it was against his skin. Jisung would put up with just about anything for the angel laying on his chest. The older couldn’t help but coo and kiss and nuzzle at Eric’s knuckles.

 

“And what normal person can fuck around with time?” Eric looked defeated at the question, “People like us can’t _be_ normal, but we can at least act normal, right? Convince ourselves that we’re not entirely fucked up genetically?” Jisung questioned with hope dripping from his words, but Eric remained unconvinced.

 

“Then... won’t we just be living a lie?” Eric questioned.

 

“No one is a truly honest man, angel,” Eric sat up at that, leaning his back against the cold wall and Jisung sat up on his elbows to watch him wearily. Eric looked like he was ready to burst into tears at any moment, and Jisung prepared himself so he was ready when he finally did. Firstly, it started with a sniffle, then two, and then a tear slipped before sobs racked Eric’s cold, icy bones. Jisung surged forward, holding Eric’s head close to his chest and curling his fingers through his hair like he knew Eric liked while whispering sweet reassurances into his hair.   


“I’m fifteen-years-old, Jisung and I want nothing more than to just end it here so I don’t have to deal with this bullshit later,” Eric admitted and Jisung’s heart sunk to his stomach.

 

“Eric, you listen to me, okay? We are young. I know it’s hard right now with not only the abilities but all of this,” Jisung waved sporadically between the two of them, “But that doesn’t mean you should take your own life,” Jisung sounded hurt, desperate even just to convince Eric that his life was worth more than he thought. _Pain is just temporary_.  Jisung just wanted Eric to understand that to someone, he was more than a wad of gum underneath a desk. “Hey, I have an idea,” Jisung beamed real quick after Eric calmed down, and Eric’s heart fluttered at the glitter in Jisung’s eyes. “Get your clothes on. I’m taking you somewhere,” Jisung ordered, climbing down from the bed.

 

“Jisung…” Eric trailed off wearily, but there was still a small giggle behind his tone.

 

“Come on, angel. Just trust me,”

 

“Last time we had this interaction, we almost got arrested,”

 

“But you had fun didn’t you?” Jisung grinned innocently at the younger, Eric scowling down at him with messy hair. “Please?” Jisung whined, jutting out his bottom lip for an extra effect that only did so much. Nonetheless, Eric got down from the top bunk, grabbed a pair of sweatpants to slip up his legs and a hoodie to keep the cold at bay. The two crept towards the front door, trying their best not to wake up Woohyun, hand in hand and masks covering their mouths to stifle their loud breathing. They managed to get out of the basement apartment without waking up Woohyun and safely on the street, hands separated and walking a few inches apart.

 

“So, where are you taking me? Should I be scared?” Eric questioned but kept his voice low in fear of someone hearing them. There were already people walking on the streets, but they were on the bad side of town where it was unsafe to be out after sunset. Jisung shrugged nonchalantly.

 

“Depends,” Eric swatted at his shoulder in protest, whining out about how he was too tired to stir up trouble, but Jisung grabbed for his hand, batting it away and patting his lower back, “It won’t be scary, you little baby. Nothing bad is going to happen,” Jisung reassured before moving his hand away and tucking it back into his hoodie pocket. Eric only became more and more suspicious when Jisung leads them into the thick forest townsfolk were warned not to enter.

 

“Jisung! We’re going to get raped and murdered in here!” Eric hissed, but Jisung just waved him off.

 

“I come in here all the time, there’s nothing but animals here,” Jisung said at normal volume, squeaking when Eric circled his head to place his palm over his mouth.

 

“Keep your voice down,” Eric pleaded with a whisper, and Jisung complied with a roll of his eyes and a small muttered insult. Though he couldn’t really complain when Eric grabbed his hand and tucked himself into Jisung’s side as if the smaller was a human shield, “If some killer is coming in here, they’re going to have to get to you first before they get to me,” Eric promised, snickering a bit when Jisung gasped in horror.

 

“Brat!” When Eric started laughing, Jisung went to pull himself away but the younger only pulled him back into his body with a whimper and snuggling his head into his shoulder. “You’re lucky I love you,” Jisung grumbled under his breath, not really expecting Eric to think anything of it, but the teenager gazed up at him in pure bewilderment.

 

“W-What?” Eric stammered.

 

“Nothing! Nothing!” Jisung nervously broke through at lightning speed, walking at a much faster pace and praying to the gods above that Eric wouldn’t ask anything more about it. Luckily for him, they listened and Eric kept his mouth shut along with his arms circled tightly around Jisung’s bicep. Soon, they reached a clearing that was an obvious hangout for some of the older teenagers, and Jisung grinned when he saw all the empty beer bottles laying around. So, he parted from Eric to gather a few and set them up in different areas of the clearing. “Ok, stand in the middle,” Jisung ordered, grinning when Eric practically leaped there. “Angel, I want you to knock down all of these bottles from where you’re standing,”

 

“How?”

 

“Angel, you know how,” Eric deflated at that.

 

“Jisung…” Eric whimpered but Jisung just sighed.

 

“Angel, you need to know how to take care of yourself,” But Eric didn’t listen. He gathered rocks from all around him and began launching them at the bottles until all of them had been knocked down except for one too far to get with a rock. “Come on, Eric. It’s really not that bad-” But Eric’s hands had formed fists clouded with thick, chilling fog before a spike went flying, pinning Jisung to a nearby tree by his jacket. “E-Eric!” Jisung gasped out, trying to get the ice spike out of the tree so he could be free but Eric was fuming with anger.

 

“Fuck you, Han Jisung! You know I hate this!” Eric formed another ice spike, throwing it in Jisung’s direction and missing his ear by half a centimeter. “I hate this part of myself and you try and use it against me!”

 

“You should love every part of yourself!” Jisung exclaimed, trying to get the ice spike out but stopping with a gasp when another spike grazed his cheek causing it to bleed.

 

“Fuck you, and fuck your honied words, Han Jisung!” Eric screeched before stomping away and escaping into the forest. Jisung slumped against the tree, his heart cracking in his chest and his hands aching. Jisung regrets not telling Eric he loved him and not shoving him up against the nearest tree so they could avoid all of this mess, but it looked he just wasn’t that lucky. He never would be. Instead, he had to pry himself from a tree because he pissed off the person he loved and trail back into the city in the dark and too little energy to use his powers to speed up time. Though Jisung realized he had his wallet on him and some relief flooded through his chest.

 

At least he had enough money for the twenty-four-hour ice cream shop down the road. So, he headed in that direction with only one thought in mind and that was strawberry ice cream with a scoop of lemon box ice cream on top with a waffle cone. Jisung’s stomach grumbled at the thought of it. Unfortunately he didn’t get around to eating a solid dinner and only had a smoothie for lunch, so his body was in desperate need of _something_. “Ah, Jisung. I was wondering when you’d come back here,” a voice piped up from the counter when Jisung entered. It was a man with round glasses and bleached hair that hung in his eyes, and Jisung grinned from ear to ear. It had been a while since he had seen Jae.

 

Jae was one of Jisung’s brother’s best friends (But if you were to ask him, they definitely had something going on that wasn’t just platonic) until Younghyun up and left, and yes, while the older was bitter about it at times, he never treated Jisung any differently from how he used to. “Hey, Hyung!” Jisung smiled, happy Jae still remembers his order and starts putting it together while Jisung pulls out his wallet to slip the elder some money.

 

“It’s on me, kid. You look tired,” Jae murmured, leaning over the counter briefly to run his thumb across his cheek to swipe away some of the dripping blood, “what happened?” He questioned with a concerned pout, however, Jisung stayed quiet and shook his head dismissively. The thing was that Jae didn’t know. He didn’t know about any of this weird ability shit despite practically being apart of a family full of them. Jisung wanted it to stay that way. Jae deserved to be ignorant to that part of the world.

 

“Don’t worry, Hyung. Just got into bit of a scuffle is all,” And with the sight of the lopsided grin Jisung offered him, Jae passed over the waffle cone ice cream cup with a spoon inside just as the bell to the store chimed. Jisung whirled around to see the one and only Seo Changbin, class president, in an ice cream shop on the off side of town at approximately 3 in the morning. The two looked at each other, and Jisung squinted his eyes a bit at the elder. Changbin looked like a fucking mess. “Hey, Hold this for me will you? I’m gonna go clean up,” Jisung whispered to Jae before escaping into the bathroom at the back of the stores and breathing out a deep sigh. Jisung padded over to the sink, looking in the dirty mirror and wincing at the sight of his cheek. Eric really fucking nicked him.

 

Suddenly, the bathroom door creaked open, and Jisung internally sighed when he saw Changbin peering in. Nothing was said, nothing needed to be at the time because Changbin grabbed a paper towel, ran it under some water, and gently dabbed the blood away from Jisung’s cheek. “Got into a brawl?” Changbin questioned quietly but Jisung only grinned a half assed smile.

 

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d ask you the same thing considering how purple your eye bags are,” Jisung hushed, and while it seemed teasing, it was obvious he was a little concerned. “You got any sleep recently, pres?” Changbin wasn’t sure what the say to that if he were honest, but he figured it wouldn’t hurt to say the truth.

 

“Eh, not really. But what teenager does?” Changbin shrugged.

 

“I thought at least the preacher’s kid would get some regular sleep considering you’re in a safe home all the time,” Changbin wanted to scream out about how it wasn’t as safe as it seemed and that he felt trapped there more times than not, but he kept his mouth shut in that regard. He only stayed quiet for a moment, pulling the paper towel away to throw it away with Jisung’s eyes trained on him.

 

“I’m not as abnormal as you think, Han Jisung,” Changbin murmured, a small smile tugging at his lips that Jisung matched.

 

“I suppose not, pres,” And then it was quiet, Changbin scrubbing at his hands under the cold water and old hand soap that’s been used since the 90’s. “Care to join me?” Jisung questioned, holding open the bathroom door for the elder like the gentlemen he could be sometimes. Jisung wasn’t sure why he asked, but he figured he could do with the company since the whole thing with Eric hadn’t quite set in yet and Changbin looked like he was on the verge of a mental breakdown. “I’ll even pay for your Ice cream,” Jisung bribes but Changbin just laughed quietly and shook his head.

 

“No need. I’ll join you,” Changbin promised, and let Jisung sit down with his ice cream before ordering almost the exact same thing but instead of lemon ice cream, he got blueberry. So, they sat down, right across from each other, and a silence fell over them. It wasn’t awkward, but it wasn’t exactly comfortable either. Jae has escaped into the back, leaving the two alone. “What have you been up to, lately? I haven’t seen you around school as much…” Jisung had stopped going to school as much and has began to take most of his classes online.

 

“Erm… I’m working from home more. It makes helping my grandfather a lot easier,” Woohyun had grown sickly over the course of the last few months, and it was beginning to give Jisung a scare. He had no idea what the fuck he was going to do if Woohyun died before Jisung was an adult. “Why? Miss me?” Jisung teased, cocking his head to the side and watching the way Changbin calmly placed his spoon in his cup and looked over at Jisung with a weird glint in his eyes.

 

“It’s just quiet is all,” Changbin murmured, playing with his hoodie strings and flinching back when Jisung suddenly pinched his cheek.

 

“Aw! Changbinnie Missed me!”

 

“Stop, you brat!” Changbin whined, batting Jisung’s hands away with a scowl. After that, things were easier. Conversation picked up and Jisung actually felt like he could hold a normal conversation with someone who looked like they needed. Jisung was finally doing something right it seemed.

 

However, when Jisung was in the middle of laughing, his eyes traveled to the window and he froze. There was a hooded figures stood outside, face nothing but a black void and that’s when Jisung slipped into that world in between where everything ran at Jisung’s own accord. He could already feel the headache springing on, but he had to make sure this person wasn’t going to hurt them. He didn’t want Changbin to get killed that night. Much to his horror, the figure was unaffected by the world around him, and when Jisung left the shop, the figure turned to him like some sort of creepy statue. “Who are you? What do you want?”

 

Jisung felt frozen in place when the figure approached him, a black gloved hand reaching out to cup at Jisung’s cheek. However, the hand slid down to his chest and a singular finger was pointed into his chest before the figure pointed aggressively in Changbin’s direction.

 

“ **_Important_ **,” the figure hissed out, and Jisung sucked in a harsh breath.

 

“Changbin is important?” The finger moved back into his chest.

 

“ **_Important_ **,”

 

“We’re both important?” But the figure turned and walked away, Jisung trying to run after him and call out to the figure, but his ears began to ring and a sharp pain darted through his head. It only lessened when Jisung neared Changbin again. So, he sat back down, and slipped back into reality, suddenly feeling far too drained for it to be okay.

 

“Jisung? Jisung!” Changbin exclaimed when blood began to gush from Jisung’s nose, but Jisung didn’t hear it. The ringing in his ears became so sharp that Jisung couldn’t hear anything over it and all he could do was hold his head in his hands until everything went black. “Fuck!”

 

The sight before Changbin was haunting. Jisung was cheek down on the table, eyes snapped shut, mouth agape, and nose dripping from his nose and onto the table. When he had woken up from a nightmare that night, the last thing he expected was to find himself in an ice cream shop on the offside of town with Han Jisung passed out on the table, but nothing about tonight was normal to begin with. It felt like Changbin had been in a daze since the moment he woke up, almost as if he hadn’t woken up at all, but now it was only worse. It wasn’t just him imagining anymore, the view before him flickered on and off with angry, high pitched roar that you would hear in a horror movie and it flickered between reality and something a lot more dark.

 

One moment it was cold, the true reality, but the next it was hot and dark. Flames ignited all around them, the lights were out, and Jisung’s body was on fire. Despite everything, when Changbin glanced down at his palms, the burns were still there but as quickly as he had seen them, they were gone and Changbin was struggling to figure out what was real and what wasn’t. He was truly going insane, and he couldn’t help but think this was some sort of punishment. “What have I done, my lord? What have I done to make you angry?” Changbin whispered up to the heavens but was met with nothing but the flicker of a burning ceiling and a sob slipped from his throat. “Hey! Hey, we need help in here!” Changbin called out suddenly, seeing the ice cream man from earlier bolt out from the back, holding a broom up as if it were some sort of spear and Changbin flinched back.

 

“God damnit,” Jae sighed out when he rounded the table to see the blood pooling from Jisung’s nose, shaking his head, “This happens a lot, don’t worry too much. I just need to get him in the car,” Jae grunted, trying his best to move Jisung on his own but he was tired and Jisung was heavy despite how small he was. “Care to lend a hand?” Jae panted, fully ready to drag Jisung across the ground but wanted to save some of his diginity first. Changbin gladly lended it, grabbing for Jisung’s ankles and helping Jae carry him out to an old pick up truck out back. They situated him so the teenager was sat up and buckled in safely (Changbin’s contribution) before Jae shut the door and Changbin began having second thoughts. “Thanks, kid. I’ll take Jisung home in a few minutes. I have to close up first,” Jae informed with a smile.

 

“Oh… You’re welcome,” Changbin hushed and then an awkward silence fell over them. _Why was this kid still standing here?_

 

“You should probably head home. I’ve never seen you over here before so I’m assuming you’re not from around here and your folks at home will be upset if they find you’re not there,” Jae was right on the nose with that one and Changbin was mildly impressed.

 

“You’re good,” Changbin waved a finger in the elder’s direction, earning a charming smile and a hand covering the ice cream man’s heart.

 

“Thank you, as a future psychatrist, that was great to hear,” Jae sniffled dramatically, earning a cute giggle from the teenager and smiling softly. _Cute kid_ . Jae already felt like he was ready to take him under his wing and claim him as a little brother. “You need a ride home? This part of town is dangerous at night,” Jae offered with a soft smile that made Changbin’s chest twist, but as quickly as the warm feeling bubbled in his stomach, it was replaced by his own internal knives. _No, Seo Changbin! This is why the lord is angry at you! This is why he’s punishing you! A man is not supposed to look at another man the way you’re looking at him right now_. Changbin shook his head quickly.

 

“N-No! It’s fine, I’ll be fine! Have a blessed night!” Changbin yelped out, turning to leave but Jae grabbed for his wrist with a pout and a weary look in his eyes.

 

“Seriously, kid… I don’t want to risk you getting hurt, especially if I don’t have a solid way of knowing you got home safely,” Changbin didn’t really know what to do with that but he knew better than to just leave with this man so settled for grabbing a piece of paper and a pen from the front counter.

 

“Here,” Changbin handed it over to him, “Write down your number and I’ll text you when I get home,” Changbin offered with a small smile and Jae figured that was the best he would get out of him until it was pretty much considered kidnapping so wrote it down and handed it back to the younger. Changbin, despite the internal hatred and will to stop, let a smile bloom over his lips and the warm feeling in his stomach bubble back up. _This was wrong_. “I should be going,” Changbin huffed when a comfortable silence fell over them, eyes boring into the other in a studious manner.

 

“R-Right, Yeah,” Jae stumbled, coughing and rubbing the back of his neck. He was an intense one wasn’t he? “I can’t believe I got your number before I got your name though,” Jae hummed in amusement, not letting the teenager leave quite yet, “I’m Jaehyun, but you can just call me Jae,” Changbin stared at the hand held out to him, it was so much bigger than Changbin’s and he wouldn’t realize it until Changbin’s own hand slipped into Jae’s giving him a firm shake.

 

“Changbin,” That was their cue to part and Changbin whirled around, heart thumping in his chest and cheeks warm with delight. “Have a blessed night, Jae,” Changbin murmured and Jae smiled and saluted before escaping out the back and Changbin could hear his heart thumping in his ears the whole way home. It was only until he reached his back door and stepped into what was presumed to be the second most holy place in this whole town that he felt an unbearable weight on his chest. He was not supposed to feel such things for a man, it was a _sin_. His father had told him so, preached it almost every sunday about how homosexuals were taking over and were going to corrupt their children as parents pulled their kids closer to their sides and Changbin felt his throat swell up.

 

Perhaps he should get a girlfriend?

 

Yeah. That could work. But fuck it didn’t feel right. The thought of kissing a girl again made him sick to his stomach and Changbin felt like bawling his eyes out. What was wrong with him? Where did he go wrong? Is this why his life was going to shit? However much Changbin ended up crying that night, he still texted Jae. He still texted him through blurry eyes and muffled choked sobs as to not disturb his parents a few rooms down, and told the elder he was okay and still alive, and when Jae texted back, his stomach rolled but his heart fluttered.

 

Even after he had gone to sleep, the feeling still haunted him along with his visions, and Changbin really debated faking sick and staying home that day so he could be left alone for a few hours. But he knew better. Changbin’s alarms went off several times before he pried his eyes open and wiped the sleep away to the best of his ability. With aching arms, Changbin grabbed his phone, turned off his alarm, and escaped back underneath the warm, thick covers of his bed and the first thing that he saw was his very short conversation with Jae, and how the elder insisted Changbin call him hyung. Changbin read back over them again and again like some sort of lovesick fool before fluttering his eyes shut and holding his phone close to his chest. Though the only hint of a smile on his features was the slight quirk of his lips.

 

The hint of content dropped from his face when he heard timid knocks at his door, Changbin perching up on his elbows sleepily and grogginess clear in his features when his mother peeked her head through the door. “Morning, hun,” She greeted softly, slipping inside and approaching him. It was a ritual for her to come in and comb through his hair in the mornings, and Changbin savored everything last moment of it because sometimes that was the kindest she would be for weeks on end. However, she noticed the deep purple circles under her son’s eyes and frowned, “Did you get any sleep last night?” She questioned with concern, not liking it when Changbin freezed at the question. “What? Spit it out!”

 

“I-I just had nightmares, Ma. Kept me up is all,” Changbin admitted shyly, shrinking back under his mother’s incriminating gaze and flushing. It felt like she could see right through him. Did she know? Has she known this whole time? But her eyes softened when she decided to believe her son and her fingers ran over his temple and down to his cheek. Changbin melted into his touch, letting his sore eyes flutter shut and body relax. “Sorry-Sorry, I’ll get up!” Changbin jolted suddenly, not wanting to make his mother angry but when he went to climb out of bed, she gripped his shoulder and held him in place.

 

“Do you want to talk about it?” _Did he?_ What would he even tell her? He didn’t want her to think he was dreaming of what seemed like hell, because he didn’t want her knowing that he would end up going there anyway. He didn’t want suspicions, “hun, it’s okay. It’s obviously messing with you a bit and I don’t want you to start out your school day in a poor mood,” the woman reassured, letting her fingers run over her son’s features again to coax him into opening up. She knew how to work him like a puppet and she knew that he was a sucker for physical affection. _Especially her’s_. “Come on, Tell momma what happened,” she coo’d, even going as far as tugging him a bit closer and running her fingers through his hair.

 

Changbin figured he could tell her, it would just be a bit vague. “It’s just… the town… was burning up and everything around me was in ruins. Everyone I loved was dead and I was stuck in the middle of it and -“ Changbin cut himself off, eyes fluttering closed as he took a deep breath in through his nostrils. “Yeah,” Changbin finished, not looking his mother in the eye. The woman seemed to think for a moment, deep in thought and tapping her chin. Changbin was scared to find out about whatever it was she had to say. “It’s not really a big deal though. It’s just a nightmare…” Changbin butted in, applying some cushion to his fall Incase his mother decided to rip him to shreds right there. If wouldn’t have been the first time.

 

“You really love this town don’t you?” That wasn’t the question Changbin had been expecting but he was still pleasantly surprised by the soft lilt to her tone. Changbin slowly nodded has he twiddled his thumb.

 

“Of course. This town built me,” Changbin hushed with the fondest of smiles he had offered in a very long time and pride swelled in her chest. She was proud of her son, for who he depicted himself to be. But Changbin knew, deep down that if she were to ever find out about the thoughts inside his head, the sinful thoughts that had been there for the last year or so and Changbin had failed to get rid of, she would no longer be proud and that was a terrifying thought for him.

 

“See? The town you love will not be destroyed because you can take care of it,” She hushed out, and Changbin shivered at her soft tone. It felt like it had been ages since she had spoken to him this way, “now, get ready for school,” and then she was gone and Changbin was left with a guilty feeling rolling in his stomach and aching limbs. Changbin just wanted to be loved by the lord. He didn’t want to be like this, and no matter how many times he prayed for God to fix him, the thoughts never went away. Changbin was going to Hell, but his parents would give him it before he was sent off. Changbin had to make sure they never found out.

 

“Ok, ma,” Changbin murmured, offering her a shy smile and watching the woman leave. He loved his parents, he did, but they had instilled a certain fear into him that would take long-term effects. Sometimes, when the trauma was bad and Changbin had fallen into another over sensory fit, he could still feel all the hits that had been beaten into his body over the years and it would only hit him all at once. Any other person, the pain and the memories would have sparked a sense of anger in his chest, a fire in his belly that wouldn’t halt for even a second until he had gotten the burning passion all out and he was finally safe. But it only instilled a harsher fear into his mind and more times than not, Changbin was in the corner of his small closet holding his knees to his chest with tears streaming down his cheeks.

 

The fact of the matter was that his fear was not irrational. His parents still got physical, perhaps not quite as often but they didn’t hold back either. Changbin was lucky enough that they tended to stay away from his face unless it was a slap. However, no one really noticed that he was the only one who didn’t change out in the open. No, he changed in the small shower cubicles the school provided away from peeping eyes out of fear someone seeing the bruises or marks and saying something. To Changbin, his parents were not bad people, and to the community, they were the closest thing to the pope that they had and Changbin was too selfless to ruin their reputation and possibly make the community he loved to feel torn. His whole life he was taught to stay quiet, keep your eyes down, and stay in the background. Don’t cause trouble.

 

And Changbin would not cause trouble. He swore on it.

 

So, he went about his day as normally as he could, but he was still stuck in that dazed fog from the night before and Changbin couldn’t decide if he felt like breaking out into hysterical laughter or bursting into tears again. He was teetering on both sides, walking on a thin tightrope that threatened to snap at any moment. The images of Jisung burning on the table kept flickering in his brain, but everything around him began to burn, everything around him was falling to the ground while burning to a crisp. People all around him were running or falling with the lockers, the fire licking up the base of their legs and reaching their torsos before it overwhelmed them completely. All of this happened within flashes of half a second, and then everything was normal. People walked around him as he stumbled down the hall and nothing was on fire.

 

Changbin jumped ten feet in the air when he felt hands on his shoulder, gasping in horror when he looked up and heard Dahyun screaming her head off, fire swallowing her features and body. “Changbin? Changbin!” Her voice snapped him out of it momentarily, concern evident on her face but all Changbin could do was gape at his noona like a damn fish. “Jeez, Bin, you look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Dahyun murmured, obviously trying to be teasing but failing miserably in the long run. Changbin didn’t say anything, couldn’t even really move but he looked like he was on the verge of tears and Dahyun was quick to grab his wrist, intertwine their arms and drag him off to the other side of the school, not even thinking about the consequences or what others might make of the situation.

 

“Please keep talking,” Changbin whimpered out suddenly when it got quiet again and all the visions began to appear more frequently. Dahyun’s eyes widened in alarm, panicking at the request slightly but managing to ramble on about how annoying this couple was in her third block that was constantly attempting to get with her or were all over each other, but Changbin didn’t really listen to what she was saying vividly. The white noise did more for him because the visions were gone but he wasn’t completely overwhelmed either. However, he was tugged into an empty room, a music studio, and shoved down onto a couch before Dahyun plopped down next to him and he burst into tears.

 

That’s when Dahyun panicked full force, not sure what to do with the younger teenager clinging to the collar of her uniform and sobbing into her shoulder but she tugged him a bit closer nonetheless and curled her slim fingers through his hair. Changbin isn’t sure what he would do without Dahyun. She was his best friend, the only person that’s been a positive constant his whole life and Changbin couldn’t be more thankful for that. “What’s going on, Binnie-ah?” Dahyun questioned quietly into her friend’s hair, tilting her head back so it was rested against the back wall and Changbin could look up at her. The teenager sniffled, wiping his tears away furiously and hiccuping at the same time. _God, Changbin was an ugly crier_. “Well isn’t that just attractive,” She giggled reaching over to grab a tissue from a box on the table beside her to wipe away the snot under his nose and dab away his tears.

 

“Shut up, noona,” Changbin chuckled half-heartedly, still sounding upset and throat thick, but it was clear he felt a bit better, “It’s just… there’s a lot going on inside my head right now,” Changbin didn’t even know how to expand on that. He didn’t want her to think he was weak because his mind was handling this all so horribly but he definitely didn’t want her to know about his preferences. Not in a million years. So what the fuck was he supposed to tell her? Dahyun frowned at that. Sometimes she forgot Changbin was a teenager like the rest of them, that he too had internal struggles and battles he had to fight. Changbin had been so well groomed, so well molded into the perfect little child that sometimes, and only sometimes, Dahyun saw him as a robot. Changbin was the person you leaned on, not the other way around.

 

“Come on, Binnie-ah, It’s not healthy to keep this inside,” Dahyun mocked the advice he had given her more than enough times, pouting a bit when he moved away from her and sat back on the couch with twiddling thumbs and the occasional sniffle.

 

“Can I tell you later?” Changbin inquired with hopeful eyes, and Dahyun nodded with a grin.

 

“Come over Friday. We’re having a family movie night and my parents miss you,” Dahyun proposed and Changbin agreed. He always enjoyed staying with Dahyun because they were so kind and treated him with respect. He wasn’t used to it just yet, but it felt nice. “Good, now let’s get to class before we’re late,” Dahyun rushed both of them out, straightening out her hair and clothes before making sure Changbin hadn’t looked like he was just sobbing for ten minutes straight. They all headed off, Changbin’s phone heavy in his pocket and he debated texting Jae just to say Hi but he figured he could check up on Jisung at the very least.

 

Yeah, yeah sure.

  
  


Headaches were common after Jisung woke up from passing out by using his powers too much. It was like a hangover but worse. The reason being that they just get progressively worse once he woke up and had to face the scolding of his grandfather. Though he was grateful Younghyun wasn’t there because the elder would have made it so much worse. His grandfather was calm with him, just held it against him for a while, but Younghyun would blow up in Jisung’s face and hold it against him for a while in a very aggressive and protective manner. That made it unbearable considering they used to share a room too. “I see you're finally awake,” The old man uttered, slipping into the room and giving his grandson a pointed look. Jisung had been turned over on his side now, forehead pressed against the cool railings of his bed with his eyes closed so the only way Woohyun noticed was by studying his breathing.

 

This time, Woohyun seemed to be a lot calmer, a lot softer in tone and when Jisung pried open his eyes and saw his sympathetic expression he panicked. Jisung sat up, feeling light-headed and holding his head in his palms with a hiss. “Hey, hey, calm down. Not so fast,” Woohyun scolded, and that’s how Jisung knew that something else was wrong, and it was _very_ wrong.

 

“What happened? What’s wrong?” Jisung fired out, already climbing down from his bunk but his grandfather put both of his palms up to stop him, symbols glowing brightly in the base of his palms and Jisung gulped. The teenager rubbed at his own self consciously. The brighter they got, the more noticeable they were, and the stronger the receiver was. Not many of them were capable of such power anymore, genetic and emotional matters drowning that out but Jisung was one of the few left with such great power rolling in his blood. Almost too much if he were honest. That’s why the strong ones got caught first. Because they were _noticed_. They were stupid enough to wear it on their sleeves without thinking of the consequences. People like Jisung have to hide and that’s why he’s the way he is. That’s why he lives under a mask of trouble. Because the government never suspects a troubled kid. It was an illusion. All of it.

 

“There are police outside. They’ve been there since last night and they want to talk to you,” Jisung’s eyes widened in alarm, ready to fire out ten billion questions but Woohyun answered only the important ones, “You’ve been asleep for nearly two days. Yes, they’re not looking for you because of powers, and no you’re not in trouble. Just breathe and answer their questions to the best of your ability,” Woohyun rattled out before Jisung could even open his mouth, “Did that answer your questions?” Not nearly, but he figured he couldn’t wait much longer. So, he climbed down from the bunk bed, slipped on pants and a thick coat before padding over to the door to put his shoes on. Jisung made sure he didn’t look like he had been doing meth for about two months before leaving and climbing up the small set of stairs and up onto the street.

 

There was a police car outside and an all too familiar cop leaning against it with a coffee in hand. Residents avoided the cop, staring at both him and Jisung wearily as the teenager approached him almost as if they expected Jisung to get arrested and a bunch of other cops to come busting in with only the intention of busting them all for whatever crime they had committed. “Morning, officer,” Junho flickered his eyes up at that in startlement, never hearing the teenager approach and looking him up and down in concern.

 

“Well don’t you look rough,” Junho huffed, passing the teenager his coffee and Jisung taking it with gratitude. “Come on, let’s go for a walk -”

 

“Just tell me what you need. Please?” Jisugn sighed out, tapping his foot impatiently and fidgeting slightly. Junho studied him, and the younger looked like a wreck. He looked like he needed a shower, a warm meal, and something to keep himself entertained for a few days at least. “I have a lot of coursework since I missed yesterday and I need to start on it now if I want to actually keep my scholarship,” Jisung smoothly added on, trying his best to hurry this up. It was fucking cold and his head hurt.

 

“Eric Son,” Junho started, holding up a picture of Jisung’s partner, “He went missing the night you passed out and hasn’t been seen since. His uncle says the last place he went was here to hang out with you,” Junho trailed off and Jisung knew where this was going. But Jisung felt his heart leap in his throat and eyes widen in panic.   


“Shit, wait, what? He’s missing?’ Jisung was hyperventilating at this point. He knew he should have followed after him. He knew he shouldn’t have let Eric leave on his own when Eric was so incapable of taking care of himself sometimes. Junho placed his hands on the teenager’s shoulders, dragging Jisung’s attention to him and feeling himself sigh at the hysterical glint in Jisung’s eyes.

 

“What happened that night, Jisung?” Junho questioned firmly, and Jisung knew that Junho would not take anything but the truth. Unfortunately for him, Jisung would have to warp it either way. Jisung did not kill Eric that night, but there are things that must stay quiet. Things that had to be hidden not only from the government but things to keep his reputation in check. “Come on, Ji. It’s just me,” Junho had always been the cop in Jisung’s life, but he was also like a father figure. He came from these parts, and he knew what went on. Junho wasn’t a bad cop but he was loyal to the people who shaped him. He would keep things out that needed to be kept out.

 

So, Jisung took a deep breath and opened his mouth to speak.

 

“We were having trouble sleeping, so we went out on an adventure you know. We weren’t causing trouble or anything, we were planning on going out for ice cream anyways,” Jisung started, eyes bleary for a second. He misses Eric’s lips already, “But we got into a fight. Eric isn’t very accepting of himself and I just wanted him to love himself for who he was,” It was apparent by that small description alone (and the fond tone added in as a bonus) to Junho that what was happening between them wasn’t platonic and he couldn’t say he was surprised. “He stormed off and - fuck I should have gone after him,” Jisung’s fingers went up to curl up into his hair, tugging aggressively at the locks on the top of his head. Junho scribbled a few things on the pad in his hand before looking up at Jisung.

 

“What time did this happen that night?”

 

“Erm, around 2:40 I guess?” Junho frowned at that.

 

“Jisung…” The teenager grew weary around the cop, “Just… off the record, yeah?” _Oh god_. Jisung nodded in confirmation. “Was… was Eric perhaps a little aggressive when he stormed off?” Jisung could still feel the ice against his cheek. Jisung rubbed at his forehead.

 

“Eric wasn’t aggressive in general… he really only knew how to throw a punch because he was in this part of town so much,” Jisung uttered, crossing his arms over his chest in a very defensive manner. “Why?” He was almost too scared to ask but he needed to know if they were trying to accuse his angel of murder.

 

“There was a man killed that night, not long afterward and presumably nearby where you two had fought,” Junho explained, turning back to his car to dig out a manilla file folder and laying it on the hood of the car for Jisung to look at. It was a gruesome murder but there didn’t seem to be much blood despite the stab wounds.

 

“How did he die? There doesn’t seem to be much blood spill…” Jisung questioned in confusion, a little sick to his stomach at the pictures being shown but he knew that he needed to see this. _He needed to_.  

 

“Autopsy says a stab through his heart. Whoever did this did it with some cold and sharp that could stop the blood from spilling so much.”

  


_“You know, you could get away with murder so easily if you really wanted to,” Jisung said allowed for a moment, fingertips tracing down Eric’s spine._

 

_“Yeah? How?” Eric snorted._

 

_“You could just stab someone with an ice spike. You’re DNA wouldn’t be on it and the murder weapon would just melt so disposal is easy,” Jisung shrugged casually._

 

_“Good to know, Hyung,”_

 

Fuck.

 

Fuck, fuck, fuck, _Eric killed someone_ , “I don’t know, Junho… Eric isn’t like that,” Jisung replied shakily, looking away from the pictures and faking a gag and disturbed grimace so Junho believed that Jisung was just disgusted by the pictures. Of course, he had been, but it only got worse when all the pieces clicked together and Jisung realized his first love was a damn _murderer_. Junho frowned, but gathered everything anyway and put it in the folder to shield it away from the teenager anyhow.

 

“Okay, thank you for answering, but be prepared for us to bring you in for further questioning when we get more information,” Junho murmured, patting Jisung on the shoulder. Jisung just nodded tensely, “Be safe, kid. Lay low for a while,” Junho hushed last minute before climbing into his car and driving off, and Jisung didn’t take his eyes off of the cop car until it was completely out of sight. He didn’t go in right away, didn’t climb down the stairs to spill everything to his grandfather. Jisung stood in the middle of the sidewalk and stared out into the street blankly. He was almost too deep into his own little world to notice a new figure approach him half an hour later with a stack of work in his arms.

  
“Nice to see you stood upright,” Jisung yelped at the new voice beside him, whirling to his right to see Changbin standing beside him, facing him with a sheepish smile, “Sorry,” Changbin apologized but Jisung just waved him off.

 

“No worries, pres. Should have heard you walk up to me in the first place,”

 

“It’s fine. I’m known for being quiet,” Changbin countered again and if Jisung had the energy to retort back, he would have. Instead, he shook his head with a tiny, sad chuckle and turned to the elder fully.

 

“That my work for the day?” Jisung changed the topic quickly, and Changbin nodded frantically, handing it over. It was a thick stack, and Jisung mentally cursed midterms, “Jesus Christ,” Jisung noticed the way Changbin flinched at that and the younger sighed, “Sorry, hyung,” Changbin just gulped and shakily nodded.

 

“It’s fine,” Changbin mumbled under his breath, eyes flickering downward and when Jisung realized he was still there, he was bold enough to ask why Changbin was still there. Realistically, Changbin knew he had to be over at Dahyun’s house soon, but he just… For some reason, Jisung felt like the best person to talk to about his weird dreams, “Can... Can we talk?” Changbin inquired shyly and Jisung looked a little shocked but Changbin felt relief flood his chest when Jisung looked _excited_. But then Changbin had to remind himself that Jisung had been a lone wolf for a very long time and didn’t have many friends, if any, aside from Eric but Eric had gone missing a few days ago.

 

“Sure. But can we go somewhere down the road? My house isn’t much better in temperature,” Jisung questioned, but Changbin noticed how weary he got and softened considerably.

 

“Jisung, I’m not going to judge you,” Changbin reassured softly, but Jisung still seemed to be kind of hesitant, “God’s the only one that can judge us right?” Changbin cracked with a smile and Jisung faltered a bit at that. Nonetheless, he guided Changbin down to his small apartment and inside.

 

“Papaw! We have a guest!” Jisung called out, a secret tone behind it that basically said, _hey, don’t embarrass me._ Woohyun came out of his bedroom in confused, brightening a bit when he saw a new face, “Papaw, this is Changbin. He’s a classmate of mine,” Jisung introduced the smaller student beside him with a smile and Woohyun stuck out a tattooed hand Changbin tried his best to disregard as he shook it firmly.

 

“Nice to meet you, Changbin. You don’t happen to be the Changbin Jaehyun mentioned a few times are you?” Woohyun questioned innocently, and Jisung couldn’t help but raise his eyebrows when he saw the crimson along Changbin’s cheeks at the mention of the elder’s name. _Well damn_.

 

“I assume so, sir. I’m not sure how many Changbin’s Jae hyung knows,”

 

And then an awkward silence fell over them and Jisung winced, “Papaw, Changbin came over to talk with me, so he shouldn’t be around long,”

 

“So, I trust that if I leave for a few minutes to run down to the store, you won’t burn the place down?” Woohyun crossed his arms over his chest, laughing a bit when Jisung scowled.

 

“Papaw, we have cement all around us,”

 

“Fair enough, fair enough,” Changbin giggled at the man holding his hands up in the air defensively. “I’ll be going now,” Woohyun huffed, slipping on his own jacket and out the door with a wave. With that, Jisung pointed to the group of bean bags in the corner of the kitchen/lounge and motioned for him to sit. Changbin plopped down in the fuzzy one, practically purring at the soft fur hitting his skin.

 

“Comfy aren’t they?”

 

“100%”

 

“I got them recently,” conversation was easy after that. Changbin was funny once Jisung got him to open up and joke around with him, and for a moment Jisung forgot who he was talking to again, “You’re nice to be around, pres. I understand why so many people like you,” Jisung pointed a finger his way, grinning when Changbin flushed at that. “But why’d you want to talk to me?” Changbin tensed up at that, building the wall he had put up originally back and Jisung panicked, kicking at the side of his thigh roughly, “Hey now, who am I going to tell? Not like I have friends,” Jisung pointed out and Changbin couldn’t help but feel slightly bad about that.

 

“I erm… I’m not sure why but I feel like you’re the best person to talk to about this…” Changbin trailed off, twiddling his thumbs and not meeting his eyes, but noticing the way Jisung leaned forward in anticipation. “But I’ve been having these… _dreams_ ,” And when Jisung stopped leaning forward, Changbin immediately tried to dart up and excuse himself, “I’m sorry, you probably don’t want to hear about this -” Jisung’s soft hand clasped around his wrist, looking up at him with wide doe eyes filled with curiosity and innocence Changbin didn’t even know the younger had.  

 

“Tell me,” Jisung uttered softly, and Changbin fell back onto the beanbag. Changbin wasn’t even sure where to start, but he started rambling anyhow and Jisung listened intently. Everything linked back to the hooded figure and the symbols people like Jisung have on their palms. Jisung even had Changbin draw them out and he recognized them immediately. The heart of fire was in Changbin’s blood, and somehow it made perfect sense. “Let me see your palms,” Jisung coaxed, and Changbin laid out his palms without hesitance, letting Jisung look at them. For just the slightest second, Jisung got to see the burns before they disappeared and it made the younger gulp. If Changbin didn’t let his powers take over soon… he would become dangerous. “Changbin… this is…” Jisung trailed off, but Changbin cut in before he could finish.

 

“Crazy? I know,”

 

“Not crazy, hyung,” Jisung murmured with a soft shake of his head, holding his own palms out and letting Changbin see his own symbols. All of them, every single being like Jisung had the same symbol on their left hand, a triangle with a circle outside of it and lines going through it diagonally. However, the right palm symbol varied based on your ability. Changbin’s and Jisung’s were different, but it was apparent what Jisung was implying. Changbin could do nothing but gape at the markings in Jisung’s palms and suddenly, he felt like he couldn’t breathe. “Look at me, hyung,” The same palms on Changbin’s cheeks that had sent him spiraling dragged him back down to Earth and Changbin’s eyes were now boring into Jisung’s.

 

“This is insane,” Changbin breathed out, looking like he was on the verge of tears, and Jisung nodded in agreement.

 

“Yes, Yes it is. I won’t deny that. But hyung -” Changbin flinched when Jisung resituated himself on his bean bag chair but calmed down when Jisung’s thumb swiped across his cheekbone, “It’s real. And it’s not going to go away,” and then it was quiet and Changbin was stuck with his own thoughts. The gentle swipe of Jisung’s thumb felt nice against his cheeks but he couldn’t help but think about how wrong it was. Almost as if Jisung was reading his mind, “ _Nothing is wrong with us,_ ” Changbin knew that Jisung wasn’t talking about that part of himself, but it was nice to hear.

 

“Jisung,” Changbin started. They were at Jisung’s front door now, Changbin on the other side and Jisung about to shut it behind him, but Changbin had to ask one more thing before he left, “Are we friends?”

 

“Do you want us to be?’

 

“Yes,”

 

“Then we’re friends,” Jisung shrugged casually, and Changbin felt his heart blossom with warmth, “Get home safe, hyung. Have a good night,”

  


“Hi! Sorry I’m late!” was the first thing that came out of Changbin’s mouth when he piled through the door of the Kim house. Dahyun practically came barreling towards him, shrieking out his name and clinging to him like a koala despite being slightly taller, “Noona! You’re going to break my back one of these days!” Changbin groaned, trying to get her to come off but Dahyun had a vice grip over the back of his shirt. So, he walked the two of them into the lounge, sparing her dad a pleading look as he finished picking up the room, “Please help, sir,” Changbin whined out but the man simply snorted and shook his head, pointing a lighter in his direction.

 

“No, because you keep calling me sir despite me being like your second father,” The man claimed and Dahyun burst into giggles. Changbin huffed, turning into the kitchen while hollering a loud,

 

“Mother!” jokingly of course, and she knew it too, but he had obviously startled the woman as she was of no help either. “I guess I’ve just got to do things myself around here,” Changbin grunted, before slamming her down onto the couch, the girl still attached to his back, and shoving all of his weight down onto her. Dahyun screeched and giggled, kicked at his legs too, but Changbin didn’t move until she let go of him. Changbin fell to the carpeted floor, face down, and relief flooding his body. He was free from her trap.

 

“...Do I need to call the Seo’s and tell them their son is dead?” Dahyun’s mother trailed of wearily, and Changbin began chuckling along with Dahyun. Changbin moved his head so his cheek was pressed against the soft carpet of their home and smiled lazily. “Changbin, honey, get up off of the floor, it’s dirty,” Dahyun’s poked his calf with the tip of her slipper but the teenager dramatically turned over and feigned aggression.

 

“Let me live my life, mother!” Dahyun’s mother just walked away with her hands up in the air.

 

“Now why can you call her mother, but you insist on calling me ‘sir’?”

 

“Because I’m pretty sure you can break me with your bare hands and it scares me,” Changbin admitted nonchalantly, sitting up. It was true. Dahyun’s father was a big ass man with big hands and even bigger muscles. That man could probably flick Changbin’s nose and break it. The man frowned, getting up to help Changbin off of the ground before pulling him into a big bear hug that made Changbin feel safe, if not a little disappointed he would have to leave it soon.

 

“See, Bin? He’s just a giant teddy bear!”

 

“Stop exposing me, Noona,”

 

The four of them all ate after that. It was a nice meal filled with laughter and stories that Changbin had heard ten million times over but never got old. The atmosphere was a stark contrast from the one Changbin has to endure every night at his house. Dinner with his parents always consisted off agitated scoldings or pure silence that made Changbin’s ears ring. Though it wasn’t long until they settled down in the lounge for a movie night, Changbin’s feet in Dahyun’s lap and head perched up on one of the spare pillows the Kim’s kept stored in a chest in the corner of the room. Blankets were everywhere, and the atmosphere was so cozy, it seemed impossible to break it.

 

But of course it did, and it broke for the worst. The movie they were watching was new, a drama that actually had an extremely good plot and not incredibly stupid characters, but unfortunately, there was a side couple, two guys and Changbin watched with interest until Dahyun’s dad opened his mouth, “I don’t understand homosexuals. How can they just disgrace their families that way?” the man scoffed in disgust, Changbin tensing. “Especially in public as well. It’s disgusting and they’re corrupting the kids,” The man kept ranting, and Changbin was beginning to feel a bit overwhelmed. He didn’t want to make a scene so cautiously excused himself to the bathroom with a whisper, and when he reached it, he darted inside and locked the door behind him.

 

Changbin began to quietly sob, locking a hand over his mouth to muffle them. He didn’t want to draw attention to himself. _He was disgusting._   _He was a disgrace_. Suddenly, Jisung’s words didn’t matter anymore because Changbin knew deep down that he was nothing but a walking sin, something his parents shouldn’t have to associate themselves with. The tears began to flow at a rapid pace, and Changbin could no longer keep up with how much time had passed. He was too deep into his own head to hear someone walk up before they knocked on the door lightly. “Binnie? Let me in,” Leave it to Dahyun to always know when something was wrong.

 

Changbin didn’t hesitate to let her in, the girl squirming her way through and locking the door behind her. Changbin was sat on the sink counter top, holding his face in his hands and the only way Dahyun knew the boy was crying was because his shoulders were shaking and weird, guttural noises were escaping his throat. “Binnie, what’s wrong? What happened?” Dahyun tried to reach out and touch Changbin but he just batted her hands away with a hiss.

 

“Don’t touch me! I’m disgusting! I’m a disgrace!” Changbin hissed lowly, thankfully not reaching the adult’s ears in the other room and Dahyun just gaped at him. Changbin knew the exact moment it clicked in her head, what he was implying and he burst into tears all over again.

 

“Bin… are you…?” She didn’t finish, afraid to say it in fear of offending him, but the younger just sobbed. Changbin expected her to scream in his face, kick him out, and expose him to his parents so he gets exiled, but instead, he felt thin arms slip around his frame and hold him close. “Oh, Changbin…” She trailed off sympathetically, placing her chin on his shoulder and running her fingers through his hair soothingly, just as he liked it. “You know you can tell me anything, right? I’ll never judge you, Changbin,” Dahyun hushed into his hair, but all she got was a gurgled noise in response. “Listen, we have to go back out there so they don’t come looking, but I’ll just tell them we’re going to bed,” Dahyun reassured, opening the door with Changbin’s hand in her own. “Ma, dad! We’re going to bed. Changbin’s not feeling well,”

 

“Ok, hon! Just tell us if you need anything!”

 

At that, Dahyun dragged Changbin up the stairs and into her bedroom. The first thing Changbin did was curl up under her covers with soft, red cheeks covered in tears and messy hair that desperately needed to be tamed. It wasn’t long after that Dahyun climbed into bed with him and held his head into her chest. “Noona, I’m gay,” he whispered, and Dahyun just hummed.

 

“And that’s okay, love,”

 

 _Why couldn’t you have just been straight and fallen for Dahyun?_ Changbin questioned himself.

 

 _Because you wouldn’t be able to have a solid support system like her all the time if you fell in love._ And it was true. Changbin was forever grateful for Dahyun, and perhaps coming out to your best friend in their half bath while their parents were in the other room wasn’t exactly the most ideal situation, it seemed to fit them perfectly.

  
  
  
[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1089995341137694720)]  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	4. WINTER WINDS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “As the winter winds litter London with lonely hearts, oh the warmth of your eyes swept me into your arms.”

 

> **February 2017**

 

Winters were harsh in South Korea already, but this particular winter was harsher than any winter Changbin had experienced so far. Temperatures had dropped so suddenly Changbin had been wearing shorts on a run one day and it was snowing the next. Literally. There had been such a drastic change in the weather Changbin was becoming scared for what God had in store for the rest of Winter. It was a valid fear too, as the first day of December, the town was slammed with a tough, merciless blizzard that buried the town in five feet of snow, residents unable to leave their homes. In fact, Jisung and Woohyun had feared for their lives during those very rough two weeks and more than enough times did Jisung have to venture out into the snow to get food from Jae and a few other neighbors willing to give some up since all the stores had been closed.

 

By the time January had come around, the concern for their small town had skyrocketed. They were in a valley, easily buried in the excessive snow that managed to make it down there, and it didn’t help that they were already a poor town, to begin with. They didn’t have the same luxuries as other, bigger cities had and winters like this could kill. In fact… it already had, but they didn’t know that just yet.

 

“Sup, pres,” arms circled around Changbin’s shoulders from behind, causing him to shriek loudly and smack against Jisung’s chest harshly. “Yah! You’re so mean to me!” Jisung pouted, rubbing at his chest with a pout causing Changbin to snicker and shake his head, batting Jisung’s hand away to rub at the younger’s chest soothingly.

 

“Maybe you shouldn’t sneak up on me, then!” Changbin laughed, pulling away and straightening the backpack on his shoulders before pulling off his scarf, gloves, and hat and shoving them into his locker. Jisung didn’t say anything else after that, still sulking after being hit by his friend and Changbin huffed. “Still pouting?” Changbin questioned, shutting his locker door and turning to Jisung, who was leaning against the locker next to Changbin’s like some sort of bad boy from a bad drama, and the elder snorted to himself. “Stop looking like that,”

 

Jisung seemed a bit gobsmacked, gaping at Changbin’s retreating figure in mild disbelief because since when was Seo Changbin so damn sassy? “What’s gotten into you, pres? Did you spend all weekend with noona again?” His comment only earned him a slap on the back of the head from the girl herself, Dahyun huffing in irritation. “Hey~ noona,” Jisung greeted with a sheepish grin but the older only stared him down until he was practically melting in his shoes, “I should just leave, I’m obviously not wanted here,” Jisung held his chin high in the air, turning on his heel as if he were some sort of royalty, and walking off, but Changbin reached out last minute to drag him back by the back of the collar. “Hey!”

 

“You’re not going anywhere, Ji,” Changbin uttered casually, lip tucked between his teeth and typing away on his phone. “Are you going after school to hang out with Jae today?” Changbin inquired suddenly, interrupting Jisung’s and Dahyun’s useless bickering and the two sending him disapproving glares. However, once Changbin’s question had actually registered in Jisung’s head, the younger raised his eyebrows. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” Changbin frowned, but Jisung just waved him off.

 

“Oh, nothing, nothing!” Jisung raised his hands in the air defensively, but Changbin just narrowed his eyes in the younger’s direction with distaste clear in his features. “No, I'm not going to go see him today. I have too much work to do,” Jisung answered his question, straightening his jacket shyly and Changbin frowned up at him.

 

“Do you need me to stay behind and help tutor you?” Changbin inquired with a drawl but the younger just shook his head dismissively with a wave of his hand.

 

“Nah. Go have fun with Jae Hyung,” Dahyun was the only one who caught onto the bitter lilt to Jisung’s tone, not even the youngest of the trio catching onto it, and she felt herself tense up in pure and utter irritation. _These two were unbearable_. “I need to get to class. If I’m late again, Mrs. Jeon is going to write me up,” Jisung shrieked suddenly, darting down the hallway when he checked his watch, and gathering laughs from not only his two friends but everyone else around him that probably heard him.

 

Dahyun waited until they were all significantly out of earshot before whispering “so are you two together yet?” Changbin gaped at her, eyes blown wide like some sort of fish, “what? It’s a valid question!” Dahyun waves her arms around in the air but it didn’t take long for Changbin to just shake his head and walk away. There was no way he was having this conversation with her, especially here when there were people that could hear. “So… you like him?” Dahyun inquired hopefully, flinching a bit when Changbin whirled around on his heels with a scowl.

 

“No. I don’t like him like that. He’s my _friend_ , Noona,” Changbin snapped, and Dahyun just raised her arms up in surrender. So, the two carried onto their first block, Dahyun thinking of what she was going to have for lunch that day and Changbin stuck in his own little loop with nothing but Han Jisung and Park Jaehyun running through his head. Did he like Jisung? Surely not. Sure, the younger was cute and nice to be around, but Changbin had feelings for _Jae_. That much was true, but not he was just nothing but a small ball of anxiety and confusion, and it took the chiming of the intercom to snap him out of it.

 

“Han Jisung, please report to the headmaster's office, Han Jisung, please report to the headmaster's office,”

 

Changbin And Dahyun shared a look, the younger of the pair sneaking his phone out to send Jisung a quick text.

 

**Binnie Hyung: What did you do?**

 

**Annoying Squirrel: Nothing. I’ve been good.**

 

And then Jisung was slipping his phone into his pocket and walking into the main office to check in. Jisung felt the air knock out of his throat when he saw the police there, freezing in his shoes. _Oh fuck_ . The receptionist looked up suddenly, eyes wide and obviously expecting another cop But was only met with the scrawny student they had called in there. As if on cue, the headmaster’s office door opened and Jisung felt his heart drop when he saw Junho standing there next to him, holding what Jisung could only presume to be Eric’s file. “Come on in, Mr. Han,” His headmaster uttered, sympathy and despair clear in his eyes. _Fuck, fuck, fuck_.

 

Jisung didn’t hesitate to approach, relaxing a bit when Junho grabbed his shoulder to guide him inside. “Sit down, Jisung,” Junho hushed, nudging him down into one of the beanbags his headmaster kept in his office for when his students just needed to be swaddled in comfort. Jisung had a good headmaster. Junho propped himself up on his headmaster’s desk, the eldest of the three sitting down in his chair with shaky limbs and all Jisung could do was gulp and wait with twitching fingers. “We found Eric,” Jisung perked up at that, not in hope but in curiosity. Jisung knew better. “The cold… the cold claimed him. He had been hiding in a hunter’s lodge that a family had abandoned. Some kids went down there to stay for a few nights and found Eric’s body. Autopsy says the cold claimed him but he had attempted to overdose on heroin,”

 

None of it really registered in Jisung’s head right away. He knew either way, if or when they found Eric, that the younger wouldn’t be okay. But Jisung never expected _death_ . “Oh god,” Jisung choked out a gurgle, hand flying out to clasp over his mouth and hold back a sob. His eyes squeezed shut, body trembling. He had no idea what to do now. Jisung had long since felt the aftermath of Eric being gone and it had already taken its harsh toll on him, but knowing that he was actually gone… “ _oh god_ ,” Jisung whimpered again, this time more desperate, more shaky, more _unstable_ , and neither one of the other men in the room knew what to do.

 

 _His angel was gone_.

 

Jisung barely registers him slipping into that realm between what was real and what was not. Everything had stopped around him so abruptly Jisung wondered if he was the one who actually did it. But there was no other force or entity in the room like his own and Jisung burst into tears. It had been a long time since Jisung had felt that alone, but losing your first love does that. Jisung may have been young and incredibly stupid, but he was in love because every time Eric smiles his heart dropped to his stomach and Jisung wanted nothing more than to just make sure that Eric was happy. But now he was dead and Jisung could do nothing but cry his eyes out.

 

The teenager barely even registered the new force in the room, much less them kneeling in front of him and hesitantly reaching out to stroke along his cheek. Jisung froze at the touch, glancing up and meeting nothing but the void behind a hood of a figure that had been haunting his and Changbin’s dreams for a few months. “For fuck’s sake,” Jisung muttered bitterly, wiping away his tears harshly but the gloved hands of the figure batted them away and replaced Jisung’s hands with his own. Jisung couldn’t even fight the touch, because it was _warm_ . Whoever or whatever this figure was had been a constant for a while and a small part of Jisung claimed him as _home_. “Do you always have to be around?” Jisung questioned, and much to his expectations, the figure didn’t utter a word.

 

The figures touches weren’t exactly intimate or crossing a line, but more of a soothing motion. It was obvious the figure was only there to calm Jisung down enough to the point where he could snap out of this trance he was in for a little while, and Jisung appreciated that. “Thank you,” Jisung whispered once his heart had steadied his tears were gone. Jisung couldn’t see the figures face but he knew deep down that he was smiling.

 

“ **_Breathe_ **,” And then the figure disappeared and Jisung snapped back out of it.

 

“Do you want us to call your grandfather?” Jisung’s headmaster spoke up wearily, and Jisung couldn’t say no. He just wanted to go home. “Ok, we’ll call him. Just stay there,” His headmaster trailed off, escaping out of the office with Junho not far behind him and leaving Jisung curled up in his beanbag. The teenager wasn’t sure what to do with himself, so simply stared at the wall blankly until he felt himself doze off. He had just been on the brink of sleep when the office door opened and his grandfather peeked his head in.

 

“Hey…” Jisung crawled up from his position on the bean bag, approaching his grandfather and clinging to him like a monkey, “they told me what happened… I’m so sorry, kid,” Woohyun hushed into his hair But all Jisung could do was breathe irregularly and clutch into his shirt tightly. “Come on. Let’s go home,” and then they were walking out of the office and Jisung froze when he saw Dahyun and Changbin waiting outside anxiously. When they saw him and his state, they too froze, not entirely sure what to do, what to _say_ . Word traveled fast, and they knew exactly what had happened, but they hadn’t ever seen their bright and happy Jisung so fucking _broken_.

 

“Hey,” Jisung cracked, parting from Woohyun’s comforting side to approach the two teenagers he had the pleasure of calling his friends. Dahyun was the first to pull him into a bone-crushing hug and pressing sloppy kisses into his cheek. Jisung just let it happen.

 

“I’m so sorry,” Dahyun whispered into his hair before she parted.

 

Changbin seemed more hesitant. It was clear he was trying his best to not overstep any boundaries but once Jisung opened his arms a bit, Changbin slid right into them and fit his body into Jisung’s like two perfect puzzle pieces. “You know can always come to Hyung, right?” Changbin rasped hoarsely into Jisung’s ear, holding him close at the stomach while Jisung had curled his arms tightly around Changbin’s shoulders with his head buried in the elder's neck. Jisung nodded shakily, perhaps clutching him a bit tighter than before, and Changbin didn’t try and pull away. It had taken Woohyun and Dahyun to separate them, and a part of the two bystanders believed that maybe that would be the last easy parting between the two teenagers. They would become as thick as thieves because of a harsh winter that had claimed a life too precious and dead to Han Jisung. His angel was gone, and Jisung felt like a part of him was gone with Eric.

  


If Jisung thought that the day he found out about Eric being dead was rough, the day of his funeral was even tougher. It was a small gathering of just Jisung and Eric’s family, the group of adults deciding to cremate Eric instead of burying him so they could make jewelry or small memories out of his ashes, and the crystal around Jisung’s neck felt so ungodly heavy it was unbearable. But Jisung sucked it up because he’d do anything for his angel. It was a week afterward and not everything had quite set in yet but it was enough for Jisung to feel like bursting into tears every two seconds. Though he wasn’t sure if he had any tears to cry left.

 

Jisung barely made it through the ceremony on the beach side where they decided to throw the remaining ashes into the sea because of symbolic reasons that Jisung just called bullshit. “Eric loved to travel and see the world so may he travel by sea,” his aunt had poetically inputted But Jisung had to bite his tongue to keep his mouth shut. Eric was terrified of the ocean.

 

But now, he was stuck sitting on the beach, crystal ash necklace in hand and rolling it between his fingers as he stared out to sea. “You look like you need a friend,” a warm, but strangely familiar voice chimed from beside him, and Jisung jolted a bit. There was a man sitting next to him a few feet away, and Jisung observed him with a slight pout. The man was attractive, he’d give him that, but something about him just felt so _familiar_. “Broken heart?”

 

“First Love is dead,” the man beside him winced at that, apologizing profusely, “it’s fine. You have no way of knowing,” Jisung uttered emptily, pulling his knees up to his chest and resting his chin on top of them. A tense silence fell over them and Jisung sniffled once, “I suggest you leave now before I start ranting and burst into tears,” Jisung advised, wiping away the tears on his cheeks and burying the toes of his shoes into the sand underneath him. The man never made any effort to leave, and Jisung spared him a look. The stranger only made an arm motion that demonstrated Jisung to continue speaking and the younger just sucked in a harsh breath, trying to gather his thoughts so all of his words didn’t come out in a way that didn’t make sense.

 

“Just start talking. No need to think about it too much. Just rant. Get it off your chest,” the stranger exclaimed with exaggerated movements, practically oozing an aura of comfort that made Jisung relax. Well, he wasn’t as tense as he was before and the weight on his chest was momentarily forgotten. But that was enough. “Come on, now,” the stranger coaxed a bit further and Jisung just laughed emptily and shook his head. He would never understand why strangers were so developed into his life because it really wasn’t special, but Jisung couldn’t say he didn’t appreciate the effort this man had obviously put in to make sure he was alright or to just get anything off of his chest. “I’ve heard that ranting to a stranger is the best situation because they don’t know you enough to judge you.”

 

“The world is too cruel for that to be the case. Everyone judges everyone because they can. There are no consequences as long as you don’t open your mouth,” Jisung pointed out, a whistle and sigh to his tone that didn’t drip with bitterness, just exhaustion. The stranger just shrugged his shoulders casually with a neutral expression of consideration.

 

“Fair enough,”

 

And then it was quiet and all they could hear was the crashing of waves against the shore. For a moment, Jisung had forgotten why he was there. For a moment he was numb to the pain around him and sure it was nice at first, but he doesn’t think he could ever live like that. “They… they were my angel. They pulled me back up when it felt like everything around me was crumbling. And sure, I’m only turning 17 soon but he… he was my everything. And now he’s dead and -” Jisung stopped, slamming his hand over his mouth to muffle the cry that had escaped his lips and he could feel tears forming in his already burning red eyes. “Fuck,” Jisung breathed out shakily, rubbing the heels of his palms into his eyes. “He’s actually gone. He’s dead. I’m never going to see him again,”

 

But then Jisung realized he said he and froze, not daring to look the stranger in the eyes until he spoke up, “What was his name?” The stranger didn’t seem to be disgusted, the faintest of smiles on his lips revealing dimples and sparkling eyes. But Jisung was focused on the boy inside his head and now burned to small little ashes he had hanging around his neck, and Jisung rested his cheek against the top of his knees, clutching the necklace close to his chest and staring out into the sea with a fond but sorrowful glitter in his eyes.

 

“His name was Eric and he was the most beautiful man I have ever laid eyes on,” Jisung hushed, and when the next set of waves crashed into shore, Jisung swore he heard Eric whisper back an ‘I love you,’ amongst them. Jisung flickered his eyes to his right, the spot where the stranger had occupied it now empty and Jisung felt a little bit better. Perhaps ranting to a stranger was better than Jisung expected, and slightly prepared him for what was to come. His phone felt heavy in his pocket now, weighed down by all the unanswered messages and calls from Seo Changbin checking in on him and wondering if he can stop by after school. Jisung felt bad for not keeping him in the loop, but Jisung was so broken he needed to repair himself a bit first before other hands were added into the mix.

 

Jisung dialed his number and pressed his phone into his ear.

 

_“Jisung…”_

 

“Hey, hyung,”   

 

“ _Sweet heavens above, it’s so nice to hear your voice again. I was worried,_ ”

 

“I know… I’m sorry. I just needed some time -”

 

“ _Don’t apologize, Ji. It’s not your fault,_ ”

 

“I just wanted to let you know that I was okay…” Jisung trailed off, nibbling on his lower lip, “And if you want to come to see me, I’m at the beach behind that really janky sushi place down the street from the library,”

 

“ _I’ll be there,_ ” and then Changbin hung up and Jisung stuffed his phone back into his pocket. He didn’t even think much about it, just that Changbin was slowly becoming a much larger figure in Jisung’s life that mildly freaked him out. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate the elder and everything he did, but he hadn’t ever expected to be friends with the preacher's kid and have him be okay with Jisung’s views and sexuality. Jisung learned pretty damn quickly that Changbin didn’t care, and Jisung would have called irony if he did because it was quite obvious that Changbin wasn’t straight himself based on the way he talked about and looked at Jae all the time. The elder wasn’t exactly _discrete_. However, Jisung couldn’t help but feel a bit bitter about the idea of Changbin liking Jae. He told himself that it was because he didn’t want Changbin to get hurt but it was deeper than that.

 

He just didn’t really choose to acknowledge it.

 

At the end of the day, Seo Changbin had quickly taken over the role of Jisung’s best friend, and the two were as thick as thieves at times. They had both been an influence on the other, balancing each other out and making it as human as much as possible. The markings on Changbin’s palms had become more prominent over the last few months, the elder freaking out in terms of covering them up but Jisung taught him some tricks. Gloves and makeup had quickly become Changbin’s best friend. However, despite the prominent burns in his palms, nothing larger than a spark of a flame, a promise of something big flickering out from underneath his nails and no matter how hard Changbin tried, nothing lit up. Jisung had linked it to passion, something emotional and deep that had to spark it, but nothing worked.

 

But they wouldn’t give up. Not now, not ever, “Hey,” A soft voice sounded from behind him and Jisung jolted a bit in surprise. The small giggle that escaped Changbin’s lips made up for it though. Comfort swaddled them both in cool air and kind, small smiles when the elder sat down on the sand beside him. Jisung greeted the elder back with a low murmur, just barely over the volume of the waves, and Changbin shrunk in on himself. “I hadn’t expected you to call back so soon,” Changbin admitted sheepishly, “especially today,” now they were both twiddling their thumbs, not looking at each other.

 

It was quiet for a long, long time after that, but neither one really minded. Sometimes they could be laughing until their stomachs hurt or talking on the phone to the wee hours of the morning, and other times they just needed some peace and quiet but the company of the other. This was definitely one of those times.

 

Jisung shifted, swiveling around so he was laying down in the ground but his head was resting on Changbin’s right thigh. The elder seemed slightly caught off guard by the whole thing but didn’t really question it, reaching his left hand down to curl his fingers into Jisung’s hair and scratch at his scalp. Changbin’s other hand reached out to begin slightly creeping up his chest, loosening the tie around his neck until it was fully undone. It was… strangely intimate but so them all the same. “Thank you,” Jisung rasped out, peeping an eye open to look up at Changbin. If someone had told them this is where he’d end up two years ago… he probably would have just laughed and walked away.

 

“You’re welcome. You can always come to Hyung,” Changbin hummed with a grin patting Jisung’s stomach fondly before letting his palm rest there. However, Changbin’s back was starting to hurt so he laid down on the sand as well, no longer able to reach Jisung’s hair and that was entirely unacceptable, Jisung worming his way up the beach so his head was laying on Changbin’s upper stomach. They shared a look, a small laugh, and then silence again, just enjoying the other’s light touches. If Dahyun had been there, she’d be having a damn field day, but at the same time, they don’t think they could handle her being there in the first place. She always tended to not quite catch onto the silent memo.

 

“Do you want to go back to my place? Maybe curl up in bed and watch a movie?” Jisung inquired hopefully, and Changbin knew he had places to be, work to study, but he couldn’t bring himself to say no.

 

“Sure, Ji,” And then they were off, a few inches apart and occasionally bumping shoulders the whole way back to Jisung’s humble, humble abode. It had been upgraded significantly as they no longer had to worry about air conditioning and heat, the kitchen was functional by every degree, and even Jisung’s room had been revamped. Of course, this was all money Jisung stole from bank accounts he hacked into, but as far as everyone else was aware, Jisung had a pretty damn good job at the library. Soon, if Jisung was feeling hopeful enough and managed to convince his papaw, they’d be in a new place soon.

 

Jisung’s hands were jittery, but he managed to get the key in before Changbin became impatient and took them from him, but the elder was as clingy as a damn monkey once they were out of view of the public. “Yah! Hyung! I have to get out of this suit!” Jisung whined loudly, ripping himself away from Changbin’s tight grip and worming his way into his room to change with sluggish movements. Exhaustion was evident in his bones, and it didn’t help in the slightest when he saw Changbin sprawled out on the bean bag pile. The younger couldn’t help but lower himself down onto the beanbags beside Changbin And despite the elder being smaller, Jisung curled himself into his side. “I’m sorry if I fall asleep during this movie,” Jisung muttered before Changbin even reached out to grab the laptop, stopping briefly.

 

“How about we just take a nap, hm?” Changbin suggested, grabbing a blanket to drape it across them, and Jisung felt his soul start to ache again. Changbin began to play some classical music on his phone, and luckily for them, only a few lamps that cast a warm glow and didn’t create much light were on, so it was the perfect atmosphere for Jisung to just lose himself for a while. Jisung couldn’t help but feel like he didn’t deserve this by any means but the couldn’t bring himself to pull away either. Han Jisung was a selfish, broken man, and that was his last thought before he fell asleep against Changbin’s chest.

 

“You’re something else, Han Jisung,” Changbin hushed fondly into his ear, peppering a kiss against his temple before sinking a bit lower into the bean bag and taking a deep breath. Unfortunately for the elder, Sleep was not something that was easy to come by anymore, partially because of what happened when he _was_ asleep. His nightmares became more frequent but they weren’t always the same. Right when Changbin seemed to be on the verge of losing his sanity, he would dream of being up in the snowy mountains where everything was comfortable and cold and not on fire, but the hooded figure was _always_ there. In fact, Changbin had even started seeing Jisung in his dreams, and the hooded figure always hushed ‘important’ while pointing between the two teenagers.

 

Changbin wished he knew who the hooded figure was, what he wanted, but he figured the only way to get there was to warm up to him. It didn’t take long for Changbin to follow in Jisung’s footsteps.

 

_Waking up in a dense field in the middle of winter where the long grass was dead and the sky was a thin grey didn’t seem ideal but felt… so ungodly breathtaking it was almost a feeling of disbelief. It’s that feeling you get when you get your first paycheck, or when you stand on top of a mountainside that looked out over the rest of the range or an entire city. It was an odd feeling of euphoria and it was quickly followed by the need to stay in that one specific moment for even a few seconds longer and stays with you when it’s over. It’s almost bitter-sweet because, at the end of the day, it leaves a longing feeling in your chest that makes you want to go right back to that moment and never leave. And as Changbin sat up with a deep breath and looked around at the dead trees surrounding him with the bristle of the grass standing tall around his body and the river nearby whispering in his ears, Changbin was reminded of Jisung._

 

_It took a bit of willpower for Changbin to get up from his spot but he was intrigued by the whole area and longed for running through these fields endlessly. Changbin stood up on two, strong legs and looked around with a smile. He was in the middle of what looked like was supposed to be a highway, but was instead an endless field of grass and Changbin’s legs started kicking. Freedom wasn’t a common occurrence in his life but Jisung tried his best to make the elder feel as alive as possible, and most of the time was successful. However, Changbin’s desperation to breathe real, fresh air was clinging onto him, digging its nails into his skin and not letting go, and this was the closest he could get to feeling that rush in his heart._

 

 _His giggles and chuckles echoed in the field around him, bouncing off the rough bark of trees and the shoreline not too far off, and they overlapped the rustle of grass as he darted through. Changbin ran until he couldn’t anymore until the pain in his knees traveled to his ankles and stomach, and fire licked at his lungs in warning. The roof of his mouth was dry and his tongue was swollen, but when he stopped briefly to let his body rest, he hadn’t ever felt so fucking alive. His chest heaved up and down at rapid speeds, calming considerably when his need to control his body took over and calmed his heart down. “_ **_Good_ ** _,” The sky rumbled above him and Changbin smiled softly to himself._

 

_“Now, where are you then, hm?” Changbin uttered up into the sky, hoping for a verbal answer but all he got was the rustle of a small, dull purple appearing beside him. It flickered it’s head around, nose twitching and hands practically clapping. “Well, aren’t you cute,” Changbin cooed but didn’t bend down to pet the creature. He stayed in place until the creature darted off into the trees to Changbin’s right and towards the riverside. Changbin didn’t follow after the squirrel until the purple creature turned back to him in what felt like confusion. ‘Why aren’t you following?’ its eyes questioned innocently, and Changbin couldn’t help but laugh and shake his head before following the squirrel through the field and into the woods. What was this? Alice In Wonderland?_

 

 _The squirrel took Changbin right where he wanted to be, grinning to himself softly when he saw a log on a cliffside that overlooked the long, twining river with a familiar, hooded figure right on top of the rough log. Changbin approached them without caution, lowering himself next to the figure and allowing himself a deep sigh. Nothing was said at first, but soon the whisper slightly resembling the rustle of leaves. “_ **_You’re becoming strong,_ ** _” The figure hushed, and Changbin, being in a good mood and all, grinned from ear to ear and turned back to them with a bright smile._

 

_“And I wasn’t strong before?”_

 

 _“_ **_Not in the way that was necessary,_ ** _” the figure’s voice was hoarse now, relenting and hesitant, but Changbin was more than just a little curious, “_ **_You were strong in habits, but not emotionally or mentally. You’re breaking out of your shell,_ ** _” Changbin couldn’t see the figure, but with their tone of voice, it was obvious they were smiling just the tiniest of grins. “_ **_You are learning, and soon you will be so strong no one can control you again. Wouldn’t that be nice?_ ** _’ The idea of being free and out from the iron grip of his parents seemed to be a dream in a faraway land, a fantasy that was to remain a fantasy, but knowing that this figure, whoever they were, had faith in him was enough to keep Changbin’s head above water for a little while longer._

 

 _“It would be incredibly nice,” Changbin breathed out, flushing a bit when one of the figure's hands came out to pat his thigh lightly before retreating once more. Changbin’s eyes flickered over to the person beside him, the figure turning to meet his gaze but all Changbin was met with was the haunting void where a face was supposed to be, “Will I ever see what your face will look like?” Changbin whispered, inching his fingers forward to brush them along the thumb of the figure’s right hand. It was an effort, but he didn’t think it would be a successful one as the figure took his hand and held it tightly, firmly,_ **_safely_ ** _._

 

 _“_ **_Perhaps one day_ ** _,” The figure hushed, running their thumbs along Changbin’s knuckles, their words making the younger’s eyes widen in shock._

 

 _“So you’re real? You’re a real person living in my world?” The figure tensed, “Or some other world? I could find you?’ Changbin shouldn’t have kept firing questions. He should have kept his mouth shut and waited for the figure to answer, but he only felt a ghost of a touch along his cheek before the figure was gone again and Changbin felt his body slump against the log. “Fuck, wait, no, I’m sorry. Please come back… I’m so lonely,” Changbin whimpered, peering up into the heavens but the figure did not come back and Changbin was left alone in his dream again craving the touch of_ **_someone_ ** _._

  
  


“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” bounced off of the walls of the small back room of a library just outside of town. Jisung aggressively types and clicked on his laptop, trying to put down the seemingly endless firewalls, “You’re a small ass company, why the fuck do you have so many?” Jisung whined lowly in his throat, glaring at the younger girl staring at him in horror from her place on a desktop across from him. She couldn’t see what was on his computer, but it was quite clear what he was doing. So, Jisung pulled out some money, slammed it on the table and growled out a low, “Go and keep your mouth shut!” The girl didn’t hesitate for even a second to leave the room with a squeak and flushed cheeks. Jisung felt a bit more at ease now that the girl was gone.

 

The small restaurant down the street had been boasting for months about how much money they had, and Jisung was becoming so entirely irritated by it all that he immediately claimed them as his next victim. If there was one thing Jisung hated, it was boasting about the fortune you owned. At the end of the day, the money you had doesn’t make you any less of a dickhead and Jisung wasn’t going to reward you for it either. In fact, he was going to make their lives _hell_. There was so much pent up anger and energy in that small little body of his he was about to explode, but for now, he would have to take it out on the firewalls.

 

Strictly speaking, it was not supposed to be this difficult. Jisung was good at what he did and he’s been able to get past even the hardest of security, but these firewalls just kept popping in, blocking him out and routing him back to square one. He would never understand why people with a small ass company were so defensive of their worthless items and land. One day, Jisung would have so much money he would help other people instead of walking past the homeless like he’s seen other dickheads do countless times. “Goddamnit!” Jisung shrieked suddenly, jolting a bit when he heard a crash from the room beside him before focusing his attention back on the task at hand. He was so close, so close into being able to access all of their spread out funds, but even if he had been able to, it would have taken a shit ton of time to transfer it all into separate accounts where he’d transfer them again, and again and again until the government had no idea where it could be at that current point.

 

With a shrill, shriek of joy, Jisung managed to finally access the bank account, and realize she had roughly ten minutes to transfer it through eight different accounts before he split into his and his brother’s false accounts under false names that they could access regularly. Was it legal? Of course not. Nothing Jisung did was legal. Was it dangerous? Most definitely. But was it exhilarating? You know it. Jisung did this for the adrenaline, the feeling of pure confidence in his bones when he finally manages to fuck Up another asshole’s life. He did this because this was the only way he was allowed to feel anymore since Eric died and he craved the feeling of real emotions again.

 

Ten minutes wasn’t a lot of time, and Jisung could hear his heart pumping in his ears and his blood flowing in his toes, but he never stopped working even for a second. Sweat dripped down his temple and down to his brow as his eyes occasionally flicker between the timer in the top corner and what he was doing. With one final ding and a click, Jisung slammed his laptop shut with a shriek, whatever sort of way the government could have been tracking him, gone, and Jisung made a run for it. He stuffed his laptop into his bag and darted out of the library in a calm, discrete manner while keeping his head down. Luckily for him, no one suspected a damn thing and Jisung felt like he could breathe again when he threw the laptop into the nearby river.

 

Almost as if on cue, Jisung’s phone began to ring wildly and the younger answered it with a huff. “Hello?” Jisung uttered into the phone, walking away from the bridge.

 

_“...why did you just throw a laptop off of the side of the bridge?”_

 

Jisung whirled around in search of the elder boy on the line, panic clear in his chest. “Where are you?”

 

_“Look to your left you blind fuck,”_

 

With a swivel of his feet, Jisung approached the elder standing off into the distance to the left of him with a sheepish smile, stomach doing a backflip when Changbin furrowed his eyebrows with his lips pulled into a pout. “You’re very rude,” Jisung scolded, pointing a finger accusingly towards the elder, but Changbin being Changbin just rolled his eyes. Jisung was a bad influence on him. “What are you doing here?”

 

“I could ask you the same,” Changbin hushed, lips pulled into a thin line as his critical eyes looked over the younger. Changbin hadn’t seen Jisung in a while, and when he did, the younger was always secretive and denied anything weird that might be going on. It wasn’t really an angry suspicion, but a worry for Changbin. He didn’t want Jisung to get into trouble when he just seemed to be getting out of it again. Jisung kept his mouth trapped shut and Changbin sighed, rubbing his face, “Jisung, what’s going on? You’ve been acting weird and I feel like you’re shoving me out again…” Guilt and internal conflict washed over Jisung’s quicker than Jisung threw the laptop over the bridge, and Changbin immediately felt guilty too for making him feel like that, “Which is okay! I get you’re going through stuff right now and you don’t always have to tell me -” Changbin stopped talking when Jisung raised a singular, gloved hand.

 

Jisung was a bit lost for words. He had no idea where to even start in terms of addressing things, and he especially didn’t want to have it out in the open. “Damnit,” Jisung muttered under his breath, taking Changbin’s wrist roughly and dragging him down the bridge and into the woods on the other side. “You just had to ask questions, didn’t you?” Jisung snapped, but it was more of a quiet mutter to himself instead of towards Changbin. “You just have to constantly be around and make my life a little harder than it’s supposed to be,” Jisung didn’t mean any of this of course, and Changbin knew that. In fact, it was quite amusing because the younger was simply irritating and that sight alone was entirely endearing. Jisung’s anger and irritation were two very different sights, and Changbin had yet to see him angry. He wasn’t sure he wanted to.

 

“That’s my job,” It was a charming, innocent smile linked with smug eyes, and Jisung felt like stabbing his own out when he internally cooed at the sight. _Stop Jisung_ . “Ok, but where are you taking me? I feel like you’re about to execute me in the woods or something,” Changbin questioned with a laugh, looking around and feeling a sense of… peace overwhelm him. The forest was always absolutely gorgeous after it had snowed because it was just so quiet and everything had _settled_.

 

“I’m taking us somewhere no one can hear us. It’s time we talked,” and that was the end of that. The last part triggered anxiety to pool in the small of Changbin’s stomach and heart, fingers twitching but warm in the hands of the younger. It was kind of amazing how well their hands fit together and just how nice it felt. Changbin hated holding hands with people because his own was always so unnecessarily clammy at times but with Jisung’s naturally freezing ones, it balanced out. Jisung never seemed to mind either, at least he never voiced it if he did. Changbin’s stomach did a flip at the thought. Soon, they reached an all too familiar riverside under snow-covered trees and Jisung pulled Changbin down onto a log. When Changbin looked at him, his vision flashed back and forth between reality and the dream he had a few weeks ago, and Changbin’s throat made a gurgly sound. It was as if words had formed and died before they could face the world.

 

Neither one spoke up until Jisung decided to break the silence.

 

“I’m a hacker,” Jisung murmured, fiddling with his nails and never looking Changbin in the eyes until the elder made a noise of confusion. Of course, Changbin knew Jisung was a hacker, so this wasn’t any news to him, “I’m a hacker _who takes money_ ,” Jisung expanded, and it took a few seconds for the elder to register what he was hearing, but once he did he was gaping like a damn fish in Jisung’s direction. “That guy that’s been terrorizing big companies in the city? On the news? That’s me,” Jisung admitted, and he wasn’t even sure why. If anyone was going to snitch on him, it’d be Seo Fucking Changbin because he cares for Jisung and doesn’t want him getting into trouble.

 

“Jisung…” Changbin trailed off with a hitch of his breath. What the fuck did he say to that? “I don’t… I don’t know what to say,” Jisung chuckled bitterly at that, never taking his eyes off of his dry, cracking thumbs and teeth digging harshly into his bottom lip, “You’re an idiot, Han Jisung,” It wasn’t angry, it wasn’t irritated, it was exhausted. The sigh that escaped Changbin’s lips was exhausted and Jisung was left with a feeling of unsettlement in his chest. “Is there any way I can get you to stop?” Changbin daringly questioned and Jisung just… _stared_. This was already not going how he wanted it to. He was hoping Changbin would just let him do him and keep staying friends with him, but Jisung was scared for what was to come.

 

“No, hyung,” Jisung answered honestly, shoulders tense when Changbin stayed quiet. “Please say something, anything,” Jisung pleaded desperately, but Changbin was just trying to form the words in his head. Though he took far too long as Jisung got up from his place on the log with glassy eyes and a heavy chest. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for wasting your time,” Jisung apologized with a thick throat, the words coming out like molasses was stuck in his throat. It took a split second for Changbin to snap out of it and reach out to grab Jisung’s retreating form by the wrist. The two locked eyes, the elder still sat on the log, grip on Jisung’s forearm firm, and lips tugged into a solemn, soft smile. Jisung felt like crying. It had been a while since he had gotten to cry again.

 

“Come here,” Changbin didn’t mean for Jisung to put his knees in the snow right in front of Changbin, to slip his torso between Changbin’s legs and lean his head against Changbin’s mid stomach. However, he didn’t hesitate to unzip his jacket to swaddle the boys face inside the warm, fuzzy coat to hopefully provide some warmth to his crimson cheeks. “I’m not going to tell anyone, okay? Your secret is safe with hyung,” Changbin hushed, carding his fingers through Jisung’s hair and looking out into the distance to keep himself relatively calm. “But Jisung, you have to promise me you’ll be careful. The government is already watching you for your abilities. You can’t let them be watching you for another reason,” Changbin sounded like a damn parent with his words, but they made Jisung nod his head frantically anyway. It was only then that Changbin realized Jisung was crying.

 

“Ok! Ok! I promise! Just please… don’t leave me alone,” Jisung whimpered and Changbin felt his heart drop to his stomach. Sometimes Changbin forgot Jisung was just a teenager and had lost just about everything. He lost his parents, his brother, and his first love. Jisung survived off of a meal every two days for almost three years at one point, and more than that, Jisung had never had friends before Eric, Changbin, and Dahyun. Jisung had lived a hellish life but still kept himself smiling and laughing because at least he wasn’t living on the streets or dying in the middle of the night because he got stabbed, starved, or the cold took him like it did his boyfriend. Sometimes, Changbin forgot and when he was reminded, it was the worst feeling in the world.

 

“I’m not going to leave you, Jisung. You know that,” Changbin laughed quietly, leaning down to whisper into the boy’s hair, “Now, get off your knees. I am not God,” and Jisung scrambled up onto his feet, not really expecting for Changbin to pull him down onto his lap. Nothing was said, no words were exchanged as Jisung straddled Changbin’s thighs and forced their foreheads together. They never pulled away from the accidental touch, grinning to themselves as their eyes fluttered shut. Snow had begun to fall all around them, coating the tops of their hats and shoulders. They shared the same, cold clouded breath, relaxing into the other’s touch and pressing as close together as they could without separating their foreheads. To any stranger’s eye that happened to be seeing this would think the two were together, but no.

 

What they had was far more complicated, far more deep for the human mind to understand, and that was okay. They understood it, and that was enough. “You promise?’ Jisung whispered out with an insecure tone, curling his fingers around Changbin’s neck as the elder’s grip around his tiny waist tightened a little. The elder didn’t respond with words right away but instead tilted his head so their noses were nuzzling and warmth spread throughout their chests. “Hyung…” Jisung croaked out. He needed to hear it, and maybe even feel it too.

 

“I’m not leaving you. I promise, Jisung,” Changbin promised with a tiny laugh, holding up his marked palms and sliding them into Jisung’s waiting ones. “Besides, we are connected after all. They said so,” Changbin giggled, letting their arms spread out for a few seconds before lowering their intertwined hands in Jisung’s lap. They sat there for a while, not saying anything with their foreheads pressed together and noses occasionally brushing, and for once, Jisung felt like he didn’t need to hold himself together. In Changbin’s ever strong presence,  Jisung was allowed to be vulnerable. “It’s okay. Hyung’s got you,” Changbin whispered in his ear when he felt the younger tremble and start to break down all over again but was obviously holding himself back. “Just let go.”

 

And of course, Jisung did. Right there on the edge of a forest and river in the dead middle of winter in the arms of his best friend, and it had been a long time since he had felt that at ease. For now, he was okay, for now, he could breathe, and for now, he could forget everything for a few moments. Changbin just had that kind of effect on him. “Thank you, hyung,” Jisung croaked out into Changbin’s shoulder, moving away with some reluctance. The smaller was no doubt aching under him, or at the very least numb so Jisung was more concerned about Changbin being comfortable over fulfilling his tiny little fantasies that don’t mean much of anything.

 

“It’s not an issue. Do you want me to walk you home?” Changbin offered, and while Jisung wanted him to come with him, Jisung didn’t want to drag Changbin into all of this. It wouldn’t bare fair to him by any means.

 

“It’s okay, hyung. You should head home as well before your parents start asking where you are,” Jisung dismissed him with a wave and a smile, stepping a bit closer so they were nearly two inches away from each other’s faces, “Don’t want them knowing you’re out and about with a guy in the woods, right?” Jisung teased, bottom lip tugging between his teeth for good measure. Jisung got nothing but an eye roll from the seventeen-year-old. Changbin shoved him away lightly by the shoulder, grinning from ear to ear and shaking his head disapprovingly.

 

“Why do you want to get rid of me so badly, hm?” Changbin questioned, feigning offense, and Jisung began giggling, stepping forward to twine his arms around the elder’s waist. “Oh~ I get it now,” Changbin singsonged in a teasing manner, taking Jisung’s arms that were around his waist and tightening them a bit so they were more securely wrapped around him. “If you don’t leave now, you won’t leave ever because I’m just that irresistible,” Changbin purred, nudging his nose against Jisung’s cheek in a way that was so unlike Changbin it was insane, “ I get it, though, who couldn’t get enough of this -”

 

Jisung shoved him away roughly, the elder breaking out into laughter as Jisung began to walk away, “I’m a bad influence on you,” Jisung whined out, sparing the elder a middle finger and a firm, “See you later, hyung!” and all Changbin could do was laugh with crimson cheeks that wasn’t just brought on by the cold.

  


The feeling of another set of eyes watching Jisung wasn’t an uncommon feeling for him nowadays. He knew that the government was putting him and Woohyun on watch for their abilities, but they were untouchable. Woohyun made it so. So, they just had to watch from far away until they _were_ touchable. Jisung carried on in a seemingly oblivious manner, but his eyes watched all parts of his surrounding strategically, using the age-old checking out a bystander trick to check behind him, and after so many tries, Jisung finally saw a guy that had been following him, too plain, too…. Background oriented. That was it.

 

But Jisung couldn’t derail his path. Not yet. He would need an excuse to take a different path so he didn’t cause suspicion, and had to use his surroundings to somehow distract the man following him. Luckily for him, there was a giant crowd ahead of him, and if Jisung did his job right, used all the skills he’s picked up on over the years, he could derail right off the bat and the crowd muffling where he’s gone. Crowds were suffocating yes, but if you know how to navigate them as Han Jisung did, you would be in and out in fifteen seconds flat and down an alleyway where you were free from all important prying eyes.

 

Now, Jisung could use his powers to get home without being caught, as he was close enough for it to not be too draining. Much to his surprise, it felt like he was getting stronger as it didn’t drain him all that much. Perhaps it was the adrenaline? Either way, as soon as the front door shut behind him, Jisung snapped out of it for the time being and let himself heave a heavy sigh before collapsing onto the beanbags in the corner. “Rough day?” Woohyun inquired from his chair across from the beanbags, book in his lap and eyes curious. Woohyun was growing weaker by the day and Jisung was becoming worried about how much longer Woohyun would be around.

 

“Rough week,” Jisung sighed out, sinking lower into his beanbags and breathing slowly throughout his nose, “They’re still following us,” Jisung muttered after a while of silence, peering an eye open to study his casual, unaffected grandfather that was too busy reading his book. “Are we going to have to leave soon?” He didn’t want to leave, not by a million years, but soon it would be necessary because they would not be untouchable forever.

 

Woohyun gently rested his book against his lap, peering over at his grandson with a questioning look. “My boy, I am not capable of leaving and dropping everything I have again,” Jisung gulped at that, “Do you understand what that means?” Woohyun would not be around for much longer. Jisung nodded solemnly. The old man sighed, putting his book down on the ground before struggling to get up and walk around, grabbing a pen and paper. “Here,” the man approached Jisung and handed him the small slip of paper with an address written clearly on it. “When… When everything changes,” Jisung flinched at the obvious dodge of mentioning Woohyun’s death, “Go here. There will be a man there who will help you,” And then Woohyun was sitting back down in his chair and Jisung was left feeling absolutely dumbfounded.

 

Jisung didn’t ask any more questions and Woohyun didn’t say anything more. This was all becoming a bit too real.

  
  


Winter didn’t stop as quickly as it started. By the time May came around, the weather had gotten relatively better but they were just now being able to walk around without thick coats on, a light jacket in the morning and at night had become the norm and Jisung was tired of carrying it around hanging from his backpack like some sort of tail. He was ready for summer, ready for the warm beaches and sleepless nights without having to worry about the consequences. He was ready to start playing soccer with Changbin outside the church again while his parents looked on them with a certain disapproval but not too much as Jisung started showing up to the sermons to sway them slightly. In fact, that Wednesday afternoon before Changbin had to attend church they had planned to pass a ball around for at least an hour to de-stress before their final exams. It was almost over.

 

Almost.

 

“Binnie Hyung!” It was a loud shriek, not only gathering the attention of the targeted teenager but everyone else in the hallway. Jisung spared them all sour glares prompting them to turn away and turn off their ears for the time being as he approached Changbin that had been previously walking in the wrong direction. “Where are you going? The cafeteria is the other way,” Jisung whined, pouring cutely but he frowned when he saw the exhausted state of the elder. It was clear he hadn’t been sleeping much as of late. “Jesus, Hyung,” Jisung wanted to reach out and touch him tenderly, to be soft with him the way he deserved but they were in school and he couldn’t do that in front of everyone. Changbin’s eyes wobbled along with his lip, and when he took in a shaky breath before his words died on his throat, Jisung understood. “Are you having another fit?” Changbin nodded frantically.

 

No other words were exchanged. Jisung took Changbin by the shoulder and guided him down the hallway towards one of the studios in the back of the school where Jisung had pulled that prank oh so many years ago and Changbin’s breath hitched in his throat. Jisung didn’t pay him any mind, sitting Changbin down into the couch and pulling out his phone and a pair of earbuds. “I-I don’t know what triggered it-“ Changbin started, blubbering a bit but Jisung just took his face into his hands and looked him in the eye. His gaze said everything Jisung needed it to and Changbin began to breathe with him, began to calm down his heart and allow himself to make that first step.

 

“Do you want me to go get you some lunch?” Jisung inquired before he slipped the earbuds into Changbin’s ears. The elder thought for a moment before nodding his head. “Okay,” Jisung uttered, barely over a whisper and actually put the earbuds into Changbin’s ears, put the face mask up so he was overwhelmed by smells, and slipped the phone into his hand. “I’ll be back, Hyung,” Jisung murmured before leaving the room and darting down the hall so he could get a lunch before the dining hall ran out. Jisung piled the food up, knowing fully well that if he doesn’t, Changbin won’t take the time to eat later.

 

Suddenly, the dining hall went quiet, and Jisung turned in confusion. All eyes were on a set of cops and FBI agents at the front door and Jisung froze. One of them was looking Jisung right in the eye, a splatter of blood on his cheek, and yeah. Yeah, Jisung knew what this was “Don’t move, Han Jisung!” Students around them gasped when one of the men boomed out, approaching Jisung with cautious. “Hands where I can see them?” Jisung set the tray down and put his hands behind his back. “I said hands where I can see them!” The same man boomed, raising his gun, and even as Jisung stared down the barrel of the gun, he was _fearless_.

 

“You dumb, dumb men. You have no idea what you’re dealing with here. No idea what we’re capable of,” Jisung uttered with a smirk, and when he made a sudden jostle, a bang rang out and everything slowed to a complete stop. This was his time.

 

But he had to say goodbye first.

 

Jisung’s legs went kicking, lunch tray in hand and it took him a minute tops to cross campus and dart into the room where Changbin was curled up on the couch. Everything sped up again and Jisung was shakily setting the tray on the table beside Changbin, “that was quick -“ Jisung cut Changbin off by grabbing a bread roll on the tray, splitting it into two halves and feeding Changbin as he spoke. He had to make sure he ate before he left.

 

Who knew that was his biggest priority right?

 

“Baby, I don’t have much time,” Jisung hushed, Changbin springing up in question and blinking owlishly in his direction, “Woohyun is dead, and they’ve found me. If they catch me, I’ll be dead by the end of the week,” that was a terrifying thought for the both of them. Too terrifying for them to not let any final words not be said at that moment. They weren’t in love, no, but they were _something_. “I have to go away for a while. It’s going to be okay though,” Jisung took Changbin’s hands, bringing his palms up to his lips and kissing both lightly, “don’t expose yourself. Stay quiet, stay hidden, and don’t give in. You’re not ready,” Jisung murmured, going to lift himself up but Changbin pushed him back down to his kneeling position by his shoulders and brought him in.

 

And yeah.

 

They kissed.

 

And it felt like Jisung’s fire had been relit and Changbin’s was beginning to spark. “Be safe, do you hear me? Be safe, and come back to me,” with their foreheads pressed together, Changbin feathered another kiss to his lips and Jisung was left with a sorrowful feeling in his chest. Of course, this had to happen now. But Jisung was tired of not acting on impulse anymore. Jisung would not be held back any longer. Not by himself, not by his power, not by his heart. Han Jisung was Han Jisung and he was a damn good man.

 

“I have to go,”

 

“Then go,”

 

And Jisung took his phone back, stuffed the other half of the roll into Changbin’s mouth, and left with a final kiss to the elder’s forehead. Time slowed to a stop, and Jisung was running until he was too weak to keep up with both sides. His head was pounding when everything started back up again, but Jisung never stopped running. This time, he was running away from something the same time he was running toward something, and that was an odd feeling in itself. Jisung couldn’t even go home, couldn’t pack a bag and leave because they no doubt had men waiting there. But it’s not like it mattered in the long run.

 

Rain poured heavily from the sky above and onto Jisung’s shoulders as he stood in front of an abandoned courthouse just on the outside of town, and all Jisung could think with still tingling lips and arms pounding in his head that this was not the end, but instead the beginning of something great.

  
  


**_“Hello”_ **

 

“Oh… you’re back. I was wondering when I’d see you again.”

 

“ **_I came here to warn you,_ **”

 

“Of?”

 

“ **_Soon, it will hurt. You are stronger and your strength will be put to the rest. This is a warning that hell will rise soon_ **,”

 

“...and how will it end?”

 

“ **_I’ll be seeing you very soon, Seo Changbin,_ **”

  
  


**END OF SECTION I**

  
  
  
  
  


[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1092762442919231488?s=21)]


	5. SECTION II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Cause even when there is no star in sight
> 
> You'll always be my only guiding light"

**"In an effort to get control of the city, police have put out bounties on any and all beings with supernatural abilities..."**

 

**"...As of yesterday, more than 140 people were rounded up and placed in special prisons and the government is starting to experience violent overcrowding,"**

 

**"There has been a spike in fights and murders in the prisons all over the country while crowds of human protestors stand and march outside of important, government official buildings claiming that they should set these supernatural beings free,"**

 

**"The leader of these peaceful, but unrelenting protests outside government buildings has finally be caught and arrested. 23-year-old Lee Minho went without a fight but spared the people a last few words of wisdom before being shoved into a cop car,"**

 

 

** _"_ _They are human! Just like the rest of us! Do not be another dictator in this world. Do not conform to their brainwashing! They deserve to be equal! Everyone bleeds red!"_ **

 

 

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

 

 

**_ Section II _ **

_**"Guiding Light"** _

_**"Cause even when there is no star in sight** _

**_You'll always be my only guiding light"_ **

 

[[MOODBOARD]](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1095065893036589056?s=20)


	6. ROLL AWAY YOUR STONE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Roll away your stone, I'll roll away mine.  
> Together we can see what we will find.  
> Don't leave me alone at this time,  
> for I'm afraid of what I will Discover Inside,"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains abuse, violence, and homophobia! Please be aware of this when reading <3

 

  


**July 2018**

 

A lot can happen in a year. A lot can change, a lot can die and a lot can be born. Time, funnily enough, does not stop moving. Even when those who can ‘stop it’ are not fully stopping it because it stills moves with fragments of seconds, tiny little movements that don’t matter much unless they’re in a giant cluster. Even when it is frozen, it is still moving for the controller. Time doesn’t stop moving, and as much as society yearns for it just stop, halt, at the very least slow down, it does not conform to the regular hands of a regular human being. Changbin always wondered what it felt like to control the strings of time at your very fingertips, wondered what it was like in between the midst of them and being able to pluck and shift them however you wish to.

 

He wondered but never thought to ask until now.

 

A year feels like a long time when you’re young, especially for Changbin who had been stuck at home with his increasingly aggressive parents, responsibilities that never seemed to stop, and an aching heart. Changbin swore there weren’t enough hours in the day to get everything done he needed to, but all the same, he let the days pass by one by one because he just wanted to see Jisung again. Changbin had only gotten to see him twice since he left, which was a lot better than he had been expecting but just made everything more painful. It had been four months since Changbin saw Jisung last but he could still feel the tingle of his lips on his neck and fingers on his back. Those days he got to spend with Jisung, those few hours at a time, were the best times of Changbin’s life and it was depressing to think about when he had been living for almost 18 years.

 

Sure, he had his moments, like when Dahyun and he had eaten too much ice cream that one night and when they cracked an incredibly dumb joke that made them laugh until they threw up, or when there was a food fight in the middle of the cafeteria freshman year. Changbin has had memorable moments in his life, ones that still make him grin from ear to ear thinking about them, but the ones with Jisung…. Those were the ones that he would pay an unnamable price to get back if he ever lost them. “Hey, ma, can I go to the library and turn in these books?” Changbin thumped down the steps, four books in hand along with his car keys, phone, and wallet. The woman looked up from her laptop in the corner of the kitchen, glasses perched on the tip of her nose and a timid smile spreading over her lips thinly.

 

“Sure, hun, have your location on,” Changbin sighed internally, bringing out his phone to sift through the steps of his settings he knew all too well and turned on his location. His mother’s phone chimed from across the room letting both of them know that she had a full view of wherever Changbin went at whatever time of the day as long as he had his phone on him. “Are you going to hang out there?” She asked before he could turn around and walk away, and Changbin thought for a moment.

 

“Probably. You know how much I love their bean bags,”

 

“Just don’t fall asleep there like you did last time. Almost gave your dad and I a heart attack,” the woman ordered and Changbin held his hands up in the air in mock surrender.

 

“Okay! Okay! No need for the accusatory finger!” Changbin laughed, and the woman huffed in amusement before putting her finger down. It had been a while since he had seen his mother not let the stress get to her. “Try not to stress too much, mother. You have time to finish it,” Changbin offered her soft words before leaving, not daring to try and kiss her on the forehead. She hated that. Claims it makes her feel belittled by her son.

 

“Yeah, yeah,” and then Changbin was closing the door, locking it behind him, and walking towards his car in the driveway. His parents finally allowed him to get his license, and it wasn’t long after that Changbin had finally bought a semi-reliable car with the money he had been saving since he was twelve. Luckily for him, he still had a good portion of it left over but hid it in fear of his parents finding it and taking it for themselves. Changbin had a job now, so his parents made him pay for his own stuff, but if they found out he had been hiding well over a few million won, they would fire him into the next few centuries.

 

In fact, he kept the money in his cars. You see, his seats were messed up, and in the back, he could literally smuggle a person underneath the seat in the back because of the way they lifted up. So, that’s where he kept the things he should have. All the things that have to do with Jisung are in there, all the pictures, the letters, the hoodie that Changbin stole along with his cologne that he wears when he feels like everything is going to shit again, and just… _Jisung_. Yes, it does, in fact, sound excessive, but Changbin doesn’t have much real, healthy entities in his life, and aside from Dahyun, Jisung is the only person in his life that makes him feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Like he’s actually appreciated and not a punching bag for his parents or a robot for the student body. Changbin felt like he was being stretched apart from all the different directions he was getting pulled in and he was beginning to lose his mind.

 

But now it was summer, and the student body no longer required much of him, and his parents were a little less aggressive as Changbin was rarely home anymore. However, Changbin’s stress never went away and his muscles remained tense and tight at all hours of the day, even when he was asleep. Changbin just stared down at his palms, his covered palms and resisted the urge to wipe them away with the makeup wipes he kept in the car in the middle of the library parking lot. Changbin climbed out of his car on wobbly legs, walking to the door behind him and shoving his body back into the car, hovering over the now open back seats and digging around for the grey hoodie that smelled faintly of Jisung. The elder slipped it over his t-shirt covered body, despite it being hot outside, grabbed his books, and walked inside.

 

The library was Changbin’s favorite place in this damn town. Not only was it where Jisung worked, but it was also quiet and no one really went there after they found out Jisung used to work there. Even after a year, the rumors never halted, and Changbin still gets asked questions about it all. The government never pulled people aside for questions on where Jisung could be, and Changbin knew it was because they didn’t want to bring attention to it, so the town was left in slight shambles. They had no idea on what was actually going on, but they made their own rumors. Changbin’s favorite had to be the one where Jisung was working for the government at the time and doubled crossed them so he had a bounty on his head.

 

There were videos from that day. Videos of Jisung speaking to them with his hands crossed behind his back before gunshots went off and Jisung disappeared into thin air. It looked like a movie, and Changbin watched them more than he would ever care to admit. In the back of Changbin’s head, he claimed that as the day his life changed forever.

 

But he had no idea what was to come.

 

“Changbin!” The librarian, a small, elderly woman who could pack a punch, hissed at him the moment he walked through the door. The teenager raised his head in alarm, tugging his books closed and ready to raise them if he was about to get something thrown at him. The woman just motioned for Changbin to come closer and the teenager didn’t hesitate, already having to head there to turn in his books and leaned over the counter, “Go into the third back room on the right,” Changbin furrowed his eyebrows in confusion but relented and slipped behind the glass door and walked down the hallway out of view of everyone else. Changbin wasn’t quick with his steps, but god he wished he had been, because when he opened the door and saw Han Jisung sitting on top of a table with a wide grin on his features, Changbin was close to losing it.

 

“Holy fuck,” Changbin whispered out, eyes boggling and mind not quite rapping this whole thing around his head. This happened every time though.

 

“Hey, watch your language preacher’s kid-” Jisung started but was cut off by Changbin’s grabbing his face and peppering kisses all over his skin. The sensation made the younger giggle cutely and squirm because they were just so light and feathery like fingers dancing across your sides or down your spine. “That tickles, hyung,” Jisung choked out through his giggles, but made no effort in shoving him away because he would do anything to just keep touching Changbin in this way. It was so soft, borderline intimate, and just so them. Changbin stopped peppering kisses with a final sloppy kiss to the middle of Jisung’s forehead, now stood between the younger’s thighs and Jisung’s legs wrapped loosely around his lower thighs and back of his knees. Changbin never removed his hands from Jisung’s cheeks. “Where’s my real kiss, hyung?” Jisung purred, not able to reach around and kiss the elder’s neck due to the hands holding his head in place.

  
If this was different, if the situation was different, he would have made Jisung work for it but it was never a guarantee they would see each other again after these visits so they had to make the most of what they had. The kiss was soft and slow at first, tentative and tender. They didn’t like to kiss feverishly at first, as they were still learning about how the other worked physically as they only know each other mentally and emotionally, and that was okay. They had to learn and grown even if the circumstances weren’t the best. “I missed you,” Changbin whispered when they pulled away, foreheads resting together and Jisung grinned widely from ear to ear.

 

“I missed you too. I miss being able to talk to you and text you weird jokes at two in the morning or jumping on your back when I see you in the hallways,” I miss the way it used to be. It didn’t have to be said, it was already understood and Changbin couldn’t help but agree. Those times were a lot more simple and while Changbin was at more risk of being found out, this was just… irritating. Changbin wanted to be able to hold Jisung without having to worry about someone seeing them, wanted to kiss him freely with only more than a few days apart. Not weeks, and definitely not months. Jisung must have sensed how angry he was, “Hey, hey, why are you so angry, hm?” Jisung hummed, curling his tiny fists into the hem of Changbin’s shirt and tugging lightly before letting his fingertips graze along Changbin’s sides.

 

Changbin stayed quiet for a moment, choosing his words carefully, “Why does it have to be like this?” There was a slight whistle to his tone, and his lips pulled down into a pout. “Why do we have to be like this. Why can’t we be normal?” Changbin murmured, and he didn’t sound angry nor did he sound like he was going to burst into tears at any moment. He just sounded so… solemn. _So regretful_ . Jisung lacked the proper words to say, so settled for taking Changbin’s hands and wiping away the foundation along his palms to run his fingertips over the symbols. Just out of the corner of his eyes, he could see how deep Jisung’s scars had gotten, the ink was bright and bold, and _strong_.

 

“Because it’s how we were written to be. If fate hadn’t made us this way, then we would not have lasted. We are…” Jisung trailed off, this hazy, cloudy gleam in his eyes but he sounded so utterly clear. Jisung never finished his sentence, intertwining their fingers to press their palms together and breathing deeply. Changbin wanted him to finish that sentence. Jisung’s eyes fluttered open again and a warm smile spread across his lips, eyes glittering, “It was supposed to be this way. That’s all you need to know. You’re getting stronger. **It’s time** ,” Changbin was scared of what that implied, of what was to come, but as long as Jisung was there, it didn’t matter. Changbin knew it was unhealthy to rely on people the way he relied on Jisung, but Jisung was all he had. Jisung knew everything, and it had to stay that way.

 

“Let me leave with you,” Jisung gaped at the elder in shock.

 

“Hyung -”

 

“There’s nothing here for me. Please take me with you,” Changbin pleaded, eyes desperate and grip around him tight. “Jisung, baby, I need to leave. I feel like I’m losing my mind. I’m on the brink of failing all of my classes, I’m so close to just screaming in my parents' faces everytime they use me as a punching bag or-or when they mention something about a gay couple. Jisung, if they find out, I’m done, I’m dead. _They will kill me,_ ” Jisung pulled Changbin’s head into his neck, holding him close at the shoulders and making sure Changbin knew he was right there. Changbin’s small body trembled and shook, and Jisung tried his best to calm the boy down to the best of his abilities. Jisung didn’t budge though. Not yet.

 

“Look at me, hyung,” Changbin peeled his face away, sniffling once and nibbling on his lower lip as he glanced at the younger teenager in question, “You can’t come with me. Not yet. Don’t give up your life for me, okay? You do have things here. You have a full ride to whatever college you want. You have Dahyun, _whose your best friend_ ,” Jisung had his hands on Changbin’s jaw so the elder couldn’t look away, making sure his eyes were locked with his the whole time, “You have things here. Don’t abandon it for me, okay? I’m just a boy,” And yeah. Fuck. Jisung was still just a kid. He was barely 17, and he was on the run from government officials while raising a practical army of people like them. “Yeah? Do you understand, hyung?”

 

“Yeah, Yeah, I understand,”

 

“Then let’s go get some food then, hm?” Jisung grinned, but his smile fell into a pout when Changbin shook his head lightly.

 

“Can’t. Mom has a tracker on my phone and she won’t let me go anywhere else without having something to say about it,” Changbin admitted, and Jisung sighed. “I could ask Mrs. Yang to go and get us something and we can curl up in the corner with the beanbags…” Changbin suggested, and Jisung’s eyes lit up.

 

“Like old times?”

 

“Just like old times,” Jisung squealed loudly, shoving Changbin towards the door with an eagerness that made the elder laugh to himself. “Alright, alright! Damn!” Changbin halted the younger’s quick jabs away with a slap to the hand and opened the door before slipping down the hallway up front. “Hey, Miss?” Changbin gathered her attention from the receptionist desk, and the woman whirled around in question. “Would you uh… I don’t mean to be an inconvenience, but could you possibly go out and get us some food? I will give you the money and everything -” Changbin shut himself up when the woman waved him off, reaching down to grab her purse and sitting up from her comfortable chair in the corner of the room.

 

“It’s fine, boy.  I’ll go and get us some food. Try not to burn down the place will you?” and then she was out the door, not even asking what they wanted, but Changbin couldn’t complain. The elder grinned to himself as he walked towards the corner where a pile of bean bags was, grabbing the two biggest ones and dragging them back to the back room where Jisung had been patiently waiting. Changbin stopped in the doorway, the younger not realizing he was there and kept playing around with a metal cylinder in his hands that Changbin definitely wanted to ask about but that wasn’t why he stopped.

 

A lot can happen in a year, and surely a lot happened for Han Jisung in terms of appearance. He had grown but was seemingly a lot slimmer now. Though Changbin wouldn’t put it past the younger if he could lift more than him at this stage based on just how strong he looked. Jisung was blond now, hair long and parted down the middle and no longer had the bowl cut bangs he had before. However, Changbin couldn’t take his eyes off of his grown facial features littered with tiny scars, especially the one going through his eyebrow. “Hyung…?” Jisung trailed off uneasily, not liking the gaping look Changbin had on his face as he stared Jisung down.

 

Changbin snapped out of his daze with flushed cheeks, stuttering out a loud, “Sorry, you’ve just changed a lot,” Jisung frowned but he wasn’t upset, just confused. Changbin didn’t read him right at all though, “Not in a bad way though! You’ve just really grown up and I’m having that weird feeling in my chest all over again but ten times worse because you’re actually here and you actually like me and holy shit when did you get so hot? Why did you have to leave me behind in the looks department?” Changbin rambled with flushed cheeks, hands waving around wildly and all Jisung could do was cross his arms over his chest, smirk in amusement, and look at his older boyfriend fondly until he had to intervene. Changbin squeaked when Jisung’s arms circled around his waist and he kissed him on the lips quickly.

 

“I think you’re pretty cute too, Hyung,” Jisung whispered teasingly before taking the bean bags and throwing them in the corner. “Now go look for books. I’ll be here,” Jisung grunted, falling back into the soft cushion and Changbin cooed when Jisung purred in content.

 

“Alright, love,”

 

Changbin tried not to take too long in picking his books, but Changbin was easily engrossed in them it was incredibly hard not too. Jisung never really minded though, because he took just as long and he was incredibly patient with the elder. Changbin didn’t enjoy much in his life, but books and music made his eyes glitter and Jisung would kill anybody if they tried to take that glitter away. It had taken Mrs. Yang to come back and find him sifting through all the romance books to drag him back down to earth, and he flushed when Mrs. Yang caught sight of the book in his hand. It was a novel about a lesbian couple and one of them had gotten into her dream school which ultimately left the other behind. It sounded sad but the summary entitled a love triangle and Changbin was intrigued.

 

“I’ve brought your food boy. You better get back to that boy in the back, he looks lonely,” She sneaked a wink after Changbin checked out the book and Changbin groaned internally.

 

“Thank you, Mrs. Yang,” Changbin uttered before escaping out into the back room again. Jisung was still curled up in the beanbag but with food in his lap and a dopey grin on his face. He looked _exhausted_. “Baby, you look tired,” Changbin cooed with a dramatic cuteness and Jisung groaned. “Maybe you should get some sleep, hm?” Changbin inquired with worry, pulling out his food and handing it to Jisung for him to hold before he lowered himself down onto the beanbag beside the younger and let Jisung settle his head against his chest, curling a leg around Changbin’s left thigh, and the elder draped an arm around Jisung to grab his food container and dig into the rice inside.  

 

“I don’t want to miss out on time with you,” Jisung whispered quietly, and Changbin sighed, stabbing his chopsticks into his rice and holding the container with one hand as the other ran down Jisung’s face before coming back up again to ruffle the younger’s hair. Before this cluster fuck of a situation they were in, Jisung would shove his hand away and whine, but Jisung sunk deeper into his touch and made a guttural noise.

 

“Don’t worry about that, my love. Get some rest. I’ll be right here when you wake up,” Changbin promised and Jisung nodded, setting his half-full container aside and sinking further into Changbin’s body before dozing off, his quiet little snores filling the room as Changbin finished eating his food and started his book. It had been a long time since Changbin had been that comfortable, but it had also been a long time since he got to hold Jisung in his arms like this and Changbin found himself paying more attention to the smell and heat if Jisung rather than the book in his hands. But that was quite alright. Jisung was nice to look at.

 

Sometimes Changbin wondered what he had done to deserve something like this, but realized pretty damn quickly that even if it felt like he wasn’t supposed to have it, he had it anyway and he should be grateful. He should be grateful he got to hold Jisung in his arms like this and get to kiss him whenever Jisung allowed him to. Changbin was grateful, but he surely must have done something right in his past life to deserve it. When Jisung began to grumble in his sleep, twitching and making a fuss, Changbin’s fingers curled in his hair as he stared down at Jisung fondly, soothing him back to a peaceful sleep with gentle touches and yeah. Yeah, Changbin was smitten.

 

Time still passed slowly, and soon enough Jisung stirred away with bleary eyes and a thick throat. “Welcome back to the land of the living,” Changbin teased, letting his fingers stroke along Jisung’s cheeks again before the younger sat up, elbows resting on his knees and and face resting in his hands as he let out a loud, long yawn. “Sleep well?” Changbin murmured, rubbing soft circles into Jisung’s back and Jisung nodded, flopping back down into Changbin’s arms with a grunt and curling back into his warmth.

 

“Of course, Hyung, you were here with me,” Jisung joked, pressing his cheek against Changbin’s bicep and staring at the book in his hand. They didn’t say anything else for a while, but Jisung missed having Changbin’s full attention on him so pulled the book from Changbin’s hands and straddling his lips after safely marking the elder’s place and setting it on the ground. Changbin gaped in shock for a moment, not expecting it in the slightest, but he couldn’t complain when Jisung placed his hands on the side of his neck and pressed their lips together softly.

 

The thing about kissing Jisung was that he was about as experienced as a teenager could be. Sure, Changbin was older and had kissed a few times before, but he wasn’t nearly as experienced as Jisung and sometimes that was intimidating. Like now, when Jisung was the one to initiate it and hummed into Changbin’s lips when the elder began to reciprocate despite how hard it was for Changbin to keep up. Jisung must have sensed this too, slowing down and going at a much more timid pace for the younger to not struggle with. Instead of taking the lead like Jisung always did, the younger passed it off to the elder and allowed Changbin to deepen the kiss on his own terms, to quicken the pace, and to make Jisung feel blissful with just his mouth. This left room for many, many surprises.

 

It wasn’t to say that Jisung didn’t hold high hopes for Changbin, but he didn’t expect him to do any of this as quickly as he did. Changbin started with the more pressured touches first, feathering his fingertips along the tops of Jisung’s hands before trailing them down to his waist and slithering his arms around to pull the younger’s torso closer to his own. This lead to the kiss deepening with sighs into each other’s mouths and tongues mingling. That’s when Jisung took the lead again, his lack of self-control getting the better of him and leaning them back so they were practically laying down. Jisung shivered lightly when Changbin’s warm palms came up to rub into the skin of his lower back under his shirt. “Hyung,” Jisung breathed out suddenly, separating to catch his breath with flushed cheeks, and Changbin smirked.

 

Jisung was never allowed to mark Changbin for obvious reasons, but Changbin was allowed to mark him all he wanted and it was about time he sent him with a go away gift. “What, baby?” Changbin purred against his cheeks before trailing his ghosting kisses down his jaw and to the younger’s neck. Jisung choked on his words when Changbin targeted his sweet spot immediately, clutching the back of the elder’s shirt collar tightly. Changbin didn’t try and tease him with his words anymore and instead focused on leaving a purple flower of skin just under the left side of his left jaw. Changbin pulled away with bruised, plump lips with a gloss of spit coating them and grinning softly. Jisung was a mess in his lap, panting, hair sloppy and lips plump like Changbin’s and the elder cooed, “You’re so pretty, love,” Changbin admitted shyly with a hand to Jisung’s cheek and it felt like they were under a thin white sheet in the early morning when Jisung laid himself on his elbow next to Changbin’s face on the bean bag and smiled at him endearingly.

 

“Thank you, hyung,” Jisung squeaked out, not sure where the sudden confidence from the elder had come from, but he couldn’t complain in the slightest. It felt nice not having to take the lead for once and to just be taken care of in Changbin’s own little way. “You’re pretty damn handsome too,” Jisung grinned, reaching out slightly to feather a kiss to Changbin’s jaw and slip his hand into the elder’s to squeeze softly. They stayed like that for a few minutes, ten max before Changbin’s phone started vibrating and the two were forced to separate. When Jisung saw it was the elder’s parents, he got up from the bean bag, keeping his distance and producing as little as noise as he could manage. “Answer it!” Jisung hissed when Changbin seemed hesitant and Changbin let out a deep sigh. He didn’t want this to end. He wanted to stay in that moment forever. He wanted to stay with Jisung for as long as he could.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Come home,” His father spat through the phone and Changbin froze. What the hell?

 

“O-Oh okay, is something -” Changbin cut himself off with a sigh when the phone beeped letting Changbin know his father had hung up and he felt fear course through him. Did they know something? “I have to go home,” Changbin whispered and Jisung slumped. Though the two didn’t hesitate to approach one another, circling their arms around the other and holding each other close for a few seconds. “Let me leave with you, please,” Changbin whispered, the ache in his chest worse than it had ever been, but Jisung sighed and loosened his grip so he could pull away and look the poor man in the eyes. “Jisung, baby, please,” Changbin desperately tried to press kisses along Jisung’s cheeks to somehow coax him into going, but Jisung stood firm because he knew that Changbin needed to stay here and live his life.

 

Neither one of them had any idea.

 

“I’m sorry, Hyung, but I can’t let you. You have to stay here and be my eyes just in case something else comes up,” it was a poor excuse on Jisung’s part as that’s not really what they did if they were honest, but Changbin didn’t try to argue anymore, “I’ll be in town until Sunday night, and I’ll be here during the day, so if you need anything you know where I’ll be,” Jisung stroked his thumb along the apple of Changbin’s cheek, coaxing the elder to melt into his touch and almost sinking to the floor in the process. Changbin adored Jisung’s touch. Adored everything about it and wasn’t sure if he could go much longer without it. “Get going, Hyung. I’ll see you soon,” Jisung whispered, pecking his lips once and nudging Changbin away, though they could never bring themselves to separate hands. It was hard to say bye to someone who was such a big influence in your life.

 

Of course, it’s not goodbye forever, but they had no idea what could happen. For them, that could very well be the last time they see each other ever again, but they had no idea what was in store for them in the long run and the two were left with feelings in their stomachs they wanted to fuck off. A feeling of resentment, anxiety, and irritation. “Bye, Jisung,” Changbin uttered, fingers slipping out of the younger’s before the elder walked away with his chest feeling heavy and head aching. He would be fine, he knew that much, but now his stomach was rolling with anxiety at the thought of what was possible in store for him at home. His father sounded empty, cold, and that was never good. His father’s burning ferocity was one thing, but cold emptiness reminded Changbin of death.

 

No time was wasted in entering the house in fear of angering his parents further. The house was dark except for a light at the end of a corridor to his left signaling that his father was in his office. “Father?” Changbin called out to double check, but the only answer he got was a slam of a book and Changbin jolted. The priest never showed himself though, letting his son make that track to him and that was relatively terrifying on Changbin’s part. He had no idea what he was supposed to be expecting and what could possibly be in the room with him. Was this the day Changbin died? Was this the day his father finally had enough and lost all self-control and beat him to death? It wouldn’t surprise Changbin, but the thought of it sent shivers down his spine.

 

The priest’s home office was illuminated with a burning hot glow fueled by the glass of rum on the desk next to a half-empty bottle of the same dark liquid. Changbin stayed quiet, kept his mouth shut and back straight as he coughed to grab his father’s attention. The man had been hunched over his desk with his fingers tapping against the side of the crystal glass that produced a haunting, slow rhythm. When Changbin’s father raised his head, Changbin’s blood ran cold at the icy gleam to the elder’s eyes. Changbin tried his best not to flinch back when his father rose from his chair with a rough squeak of wood against the floor. “It’s about time, boy,” The man uttered coldly, stumbling over to the table in the corner covered with multiple alcohol bottles as he downed another glass of rum. Changbin winced when he saw the man pull for the vodka.

 

Changbin would be lucky if he came out alive. Especially if his mother was long gone and his father pulled out the stronger stuff and drank it straight.

 

“I’m sorry. I was with an old friend and got caught up-” Changbin jolted when the vodka bottle was slammed back down onto the table and the man turned towards him roughly. Changbin kept his mouth shut from then on, the flames in his father’s eyes burning Changbin’s lips closed. One moment, his father would be glaring so harshly into him, Changbin would squirm in his shoes but then he would look away with this evident expression of disgust.

 

“Goodness gracious, I can’t even look at you!” The man spat, and Changbin tongue ended up between his teeth, gnawing as a warning to watch his words. He could not get angry. Not right now. “Where did I go wrong, lord? What sins have I committed to earn a homosexual son,” and that’s when Changbin froze, his heart sinking to his stomach, and palms becoming clammy. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck- “You know…” The man trailed off, swirling his fingers around the mouth of his glass, “I didn’t believe it at first, when Mr. Choi called me half an hour telling me you were _kissing a boy_ ,” The man spat out the last part in disgust and Changbin could already feel tears welling up in his eyes. “but after seeing the pictures and videos of you…. after seeing that you worth nothing but a worthless little faggot, it suddenly made so much sense,” Changbin couldn’t hold back his flinches anymore as his fear was painted on his face like a royal purple coating his skin.

 

The teenager couldn’t even form words but gasped quietly when his head was jolted to the side and a familiar stinging pain bloomed across his left cheek.

 

“You’re _weak_ ,” Another slap went against Changbin’s opposite cheek, but the teenager never raised his eyes from the ground he was stood on. He couldn’t face his father. Not now. “You’re a disgrace,” The man hissed, shoving roughly against Changbin’s chest prompting the smaller to stumble back. Changbin’s father was a strong man with a tall height while Changbin was lean and small like his mother. The difference in stature only made moments like this more terrifying and now Changbin was beginning to question if he would actually be alive tonight. “You’re sinful and disrespectful and the devil has possessed you into being this… _delusional image of yourself!_ ” Changbin whimpered at the sudden and fluid motions of his father waving his arms around in the air, “I will not have a gay son! I will not have a faggot living in my home!” Changbin doesn’t remember much after that moment. At least not what was said.

 

There was a dull ringing in his ears with every hit, every slap to the face and kick to the chest or stomach. Changbin knew that if he did come out alive, he would remember this moment forever, and he would remember what was said before, what it felt like before he was slapped, and every kick to his body. Those bruises would be long gone but every time he looked in the mirror his skin would be littered with deep purple and green blotches that still ached. He would brush his teeth and still remember the metallic on his tongue and scrub and scrub and scrub to get it off. Changbin would never be able to go to an eye doctor because he would only feel the swelling when they touched him or let anyone make any sudden erratic movements around him because Changbin was damaged. Changbin was so damaged he wasn’t sure he could ever be fully fixed again.

 

So, as he laid in the middle of the hallway curled up in on himself in a pool of his own blood that still dribbled from his mouth with every sputtering cough or slight gag, he breathed heavily but didn’t utter a word. Changbin had been so emotionally numb and mentally unaware at the time to really react to his father squatting down to his level to really look at Changbin for a moment. The man’s head was cocked to the side, his eyes having a cold lilt to them that would have made Changbin shiver if he was aware of it, but the teenager did nothing but look up at his father with empty, dead eyes. “Perhaps there is still hope for you, hm? Perhaps you are not too far gone and the Lord can save you. Make you whole,” Anger sparked in Changbin’s chest, eyes threatening to twitch down into a glare but he held himself back. He didn’t want another mouthful of blood. “You have one more chance, fag.”

 

The door to the study slammed shut and Changbin was enclosed in darkness and aching muscles. The only light came from the outside window down the hall and Changbin heard himself whimper quietly, bouncing off the walls with a faint echo. There was no doubt that his father had heard it but he never said anything more and Changbin felt so alone than at that moment. Changbin didn’t know how long he laid there, how long it took for his mother to come home with wine and cigarettes coming off of her in thick waves. Changbin knew she saw him, but when she went to go walk down the hallway, she immediately turned on her heel to walk away. The sudden slam of a bedroom door didn’t come as much of a surprise to him, but his body still reacted with a harsh jolt that made everything ache all over again.

 

It had taken what felt like hours for Changbin to gather enough strength to lift himself off of the ground, and many many more added on to actually move down the hallway with his body practically leaned up against the wall. The stairs had never seemed so daunting until that moment, and Changbin whimpered and felt like bursting into tears right then and there. Though he held it in until he was up the stairs and into his room. Changbin didn’t even make it to his bed before he collapsed to the floor with sobs echoing off of the walls. A hand clamped over his mouth in an effort to keep himself quiet but it had been a long time since Changbin had cried like that. He knew he needed to try and tend to his wounds but everything was aching so badly

 

Even the slightest movement made him wince and cry out, but when his phone began to ring in his pocket, Changbin gulped. With a sharp hiss, a jolt, and a few tears when he accidentally bit down on his tongue, Changbin managed to pull his phone out of his pocket and see that it was Dahyun. They were supposed to hang out tonight. Changbin declined her call and set his phone down gently, clutching his aching stomach and leaning against his door limply. His vision had already been blurry, to begin with, but now it was beginning to fog and hurt just for Changbin to keep his damn eyes open. It took more than a few seconds to focus his attention on one particular thing. However, Changbin’s eyes naturally gravitated towards the cross above his window and instead of guilt and gratitude flooding through him like all those other times.

 

But this time all his felt was his stomach rolling in burning hot anger and his palms twitched. If Changbin hadn’t been so ungodly weak and beat, that probably would have been the night the house was burnt to the ground along with the rest of the town by Changbin’s hands alone. But all he saw was a spark under his fingernails, dots of flames licking along his fingertips and traveling down to his knuckles before they were put out by the puddles of tears on the tops of Changbin’s hands. Changbin’s palms burned, stung, and seared, but it was a nice feeling, an _empowering one_. But Changbin was weak and as angry as he might have been on the inside, his body was not in any shape to try and act upon it.

 

So, Changbin looked up at the cross with empty, hooded eyes, his raven hair falling just above his eyelids and if anyone had been there to witness it, it would look like the satan inside just woke up and took over. In no part of his life had Changbin looked that empty, that cold, but all he could feel was fire bruning in his heart and “ _fuck your god,_ ” tumbling out of his mouth before his body gave out on him for the night and Changbin went stumbling down into nothing but pitch black with no hooded figure there to heal his wounds.

 

He had to treat them on his own.

  
  
  


Word spreads fast in town. Especially when it’s something as big as the preacher’s son being gay of all things, so Changbin couldn’t bring it upon himself to be shocked when he looked at his phone the morning after and saw all the messages from kids at school either asking him if it was true, girls proclaiming that they didn’t believe it and if he needed to prove himself they were up for the task, and just assholes being assholes. Though he couldn’t deny that after reading so many messages about how much of a little bitch he was, how useless and how his parents must be so disappointed in him that they started to make his stomach roll and tears spring to his eyes. Was he really that bad? Jisung had reassured that there was nothing wrong with them, that what he was wasn’t awful and that everyone just hadn’t learned yet, but Changbin was starting to rethink if that was true or not.

 

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Jisung, but he wondered if maybe he was wrong. If maybe both of them were wrong and that what they had wasn’t okay. However, he remembers having these doubts, even going as far as to voice them to Dahyun and her voice rung in his head harshly, “Seo Changbin, I better never hear you say that again. God does everything for a reason, and if you weren’t supposed to be like this, then it’s God’s fault,” Changbin remembered being a little pissy with her at that last statement, but he couldn’t help but feel anger as he stared up at the cross. Was this his final punishment? Changbin wouldn’t be surprised if he was dead by the end of next week.

 

Dahyun.

 

Fuck.

 

Changbin opened her messages, frowning a bit when he saw only one text from her. ‘I’m sorry,’ it read, but when Changbin tried to text her back, he only got a message telling him he could no longer text her number and that's when another round of tears broke out. Changbin was alone. Changbin was alone in this cruel world with Jisung god knows where and he was far too scared to face the world now. Before, Changbin felt like he was capable of doing just about anything, but now the anxiety had set in and his stomach lurched while his chest ached at the pure idea of having to leave the partial safety of his room.

 

Unsurprisingly, he was still leaned up against the door he had fallen asleep against, but his whole body ached. Changbin was glad it was Saturday. That he didn’t have to go to school and face all of the bullshit he’s already had to put up with online. That didn’t stop him from worrying about what the hell he was supposed to do about the fact that his parents were in the room over and obviously talking about him. Changbin could faintly hear them discussing through the wall, and Changbin felt his heart drop to his stomach when he heard his mother crying her eyes out. “We failed, Subin. What did we do to deserve this? Was it something we did? Do we need to be better?” The woman sobbed, and Changbin hated that his father only held a soft spot for his wife in private. In public, he treated the woman like shit and it made Changbin’s blood boil.

 

“We have done nothing, my love. He is tainted by the community here. He is tainted by society. I knew we should have been more protective over him… but there is still hope,” The man hushed, “We will take him to get baptized tomorrow, cleansed of his sins and then place him in therapy. Mrs. Park has already offered to take him in and fix him. This will be fixed, my love,” And all Changbin could do was sob quietly into his knees. He didn’t want to be fixed. He wanted to be accepted for fuck’s sake. “Now come on. We have places to be and people to meet,”

 

“I don’t know if I can show my face… All the other moms are texting me about how much he’s a disgrace to our family and - Everyone _knows_ , Yubin,”

 

“And they will forget once he’s fixed. Chin up,” It wasn’t long after that that Changbin heard them leave with a slam of a door and a roar of an engine. Changbin was glad they left, he couldn’t look them in the eye even if he wanted to. With a grunt and a cry, Changbin lifted himself up off of the floor just as his phone chimed with a notification. Changbin was scared to look at it but brought the bright screen up to his face nonetheless and stared at the message from his father telling him not to leave the house and that they wouldn’t be home until late. _Perfect_. Almost as if on cue, his phone chimed again, this time from an unknown number, but he knew exactly who it was.

 

Changbin trailed down the stairs just as the messenger had asked, slipping out the back door with shuffled, stiff, and pained movements. In a chair next to the door out of view from anyone else was a boy in a gray hoodie who stood up immediately at the appearance of Changbin. All that doubt that had been lingering in Changbin’s head was washed away when the figure pulled down their hood and Jisung was beaming down at him with that soft smile that made Changbin weak at the knees. But what was once beaming was now horrified and Jisung gasped at all the bruises and cuts on Changbin’s face, “Holy shit, hyung,” Jisung ran his fingertips over Changbin’s injuries gingerly, trying not to cause any more pain but checking the extent of them. Jisung’s heart broke when Changbin’s eyes began to gloss over, “Oh, baby…”

 

No other words were exchanged after that because Changbin just dragged Jisung’s body into his own and held him tightly. Jisung didn’t hesitate to hold him, to hold him so tightly Changbin couldn’t slip through his touch and Changbin appreciated it so much. “They want to ‘fix’ me. They want to baptize me and then they’re sending me to conversion therapy -”

 

“Woah, woah, woah, they found out?” Jisung stopped him in the middle of his ranting with wide eyes and that’s when Changbin burst into tears all over again as if he hadn’t already cried all of them, and Jisung panicked. “Baby, it’s okay. Baby, breathe. It’s going to be okay,” Jisung sunk down to his knees with Changbin, still holding him tightly and stroking his hair comfortingly. Changbin sobbed into the younger’s shoulder harshly, and Jisung had to carry the poor boy into the house and up the stairs, so he could properly tend to his wounds. It wasn’t common for Jisung to see Changbin looking so broken, so actually seeing it was a little overwhelming. That didn’t stop the younger from taking care of Changbin though. In fact, he even managed to strip Changbin down to his underwear and get him in the bathtub so he could give him a proper bath and scrub down from all the blood and grime.

 

Changbin was practically a ragdoll under Jisung’s touch but it hadn’t really mattered in the end. Jisung would never treat him like one and would be kind and tentaive to him. Changbin loved him. He really, really did, “Move your head so I can dry your hair, hyung,” Jisung coaxed softly, towel in hand and Changbin on the floor between his legs as Jisung sat on the toilet. Changbin took his face off of Jisung’s thigh with reluctance, purring a bit when the warm towel rubbed over his head before Jisung combed his hair back, dried it again, and then repeated the process until Changbin’s hair was damp at the very least. “You’re very handsome, baby,” Jisung grinned from ear to ear when Changbin pouted up at him, pressing a kiss to the elder’s temple and swiping his fingers through his hair.

 

“Thank you, sweetheart,” Changbin chimed lowly, hissing a bit when Jisung suddenly placed an alcohol ridden cotton swab to the cuts on his face. “A warning would have been nice,” Changbin huffed, but Jisung could tell he wasn’t really angry so just laughed lowly in amusement. Leave it to Jisung to always make Changbin feel better in the shittiest situations. It took a bit, but they managed to get Changbin treated and Jisung guided him towards his bedroom as Changbin gave him verbal directions but as soon as Changbin was lowered down onto the bed, he used whatever strength he had left to pull Jisung down with him and climb on top of the poor yelping teenager. Jisung’s eyes were wide as he stared up at the elder, but Changbin was staring down at him so intently, the younger wasn’t quite sure what to make of the situation. “Thank you,”

 

“You don’t have to thank me,”

 

“But I’m going to anyway,”

 

And then their lips were latched and hands intertwined on the bed beside Jisung’s head. The flame in Changbin’s chest only got bigger when this kind of passion had been added to it.

  


  
The car ride to the church Sunday morning had been painful. It was so ungodly tense it made Changbin feel like he was getting driven to his execution, which it could very well be if everything goes wrong. The elder tried his best to be as positive and patient as possible, but his mother wouldn’t look him in the eye or even acknowledge his presence while his father made snide comments and angry insults. Changbin felt like he was being suffocated inside that metal machine on wheels, and it was all because of his parents.

 

Changbin looked a lot worse that morning, His bruises were deepening and his left eye was now swollen shut, but he was still forced into a pristine white button up shirt, a blue tie, khakis, and  nice dress shoes like that suddenly is going to make everything okay and take away the attention from his sexuality or the injuries on his face. He’d hope that someone would come to their senses and call the police for child abuse but Changbin knew better than to think someone would do it. That would be social suicide in these parts and for now, he would learn to live with it. It’s not like he’d be around much longer anyway.

 

“Come on,” Changbin’s father spat the moment they parked the car and unbuckled themselves, not even having the nerve to actually roughly guide Changbin to the church entrance like he had expected him to, and Changbin was pleasantly surprised by that. His biceps still slightly hurt from where Jisung had gripped them so harshly the day before. Changbin smirked to himself, stuffing his hands in his pockets and walking alongside his mother who looked unbearably uncomfortable. Changbin felt like taunting her too, opening the door for the woman with a dazzling smile that made his busted lips stretch and the swollen left eye somehow tighten. She still couldn’t even look at his face and Changbin could feel himself snickering internally.

 

There were already people there at Changbin’s father’s church, all hovering in the hallways and whispering amongst themselves when the family entered. Changbin kept his expression the same empty cold one from a few nights before, scaring off the ones who decided to stare for a bit too long, and his mother kept her chin high before linking her arms with her husband’s. She would not let this ruin her perfect image. There was no way she’d allow that, and Changbin knew he’d pay the price if he didn’t already have plans in place. They would have no idea what hit them. They’d have no idea just how fucking stupid they’d look after all of this.

 

 **_You can’t fix us because there is nothing to be fixed_ **.

 

“Go inside and stand by the piano. Don’t make any noise and stay out of sight,” His father spat, shoving Changbin forward and the teenager didn’t hesitate to waltz down the aisle like he damn well owned the place and sat down, sliding his back against the wall by the piano where he knew Mrs. Park would be sat in a few short hours. He couldn’t wait to make her as uncomfortable as he could possibly make her. She thought she could make him normal, but she was in for a very rude awakening.

 

It didn’t take long for the woman to arrive along with the rest of the staff that contributed to the sessions, but Changbin stared a porcelain tub placed off to the side of the alter down, and if he could burn things with his eyes, that tub would be up in flames just about now. “...Today, we will be offering someone who has been corrupted by the devil and his ways a second chance at a new life,” Changbin tuned back in, looking up and seeing his father waving him over to the tub and Changbin stood, acting meek, shy, and shameful under the scrutinizing eyes of his community members. “This boy here, who I once called my son has been corrupted by one of the biggest sins of all, homosexuality. Society has glorified this topic, this… _disgusting_ mental issue that can be fixed. He still has hope and today is the first step towards that rebirth,” When Changbin was upfront, he had a perfect view of the crowd, and when his eyes landed on an All too familiar girl in the front, Changbin’s chest tightened. Dahyun looked equally as pained and uncomfortable.

 

Changbin’s shoulders were grabbed roughly by two, burly men that had been the security guards at the church ever since Changbin could remember, and his lower half was lowered into the cold water. The fire within his chest hissed and huffed, clawing at Changbin’s throat from the inside out and Changbin gasped internally at the feeling. The anger and passion in his chest were beginning to bubble over. “Are you willing to rejoin society as a normal, god fearing man?” His father boomed.

 

“Yes.”

 

“Are you willing to demolish everything you think about yourself and let yourself be in God’s warm embrace once more?”

 

“Yes!” Changbin dramatically wailed, smirking up at his dad with a shit eating grin, and his father only gave him a cold look in return.

 

“Then Be reborn,” Yubin hissed under his breath, shoving Changbin underneath the water fully with a palm to his face, and Changbin struggled and squirmed. The anger within him was steaming hot now. How dare he? How fucking dare he claim Changbin as the odd one out, a walking sin. Fuck God, fuck Yubin, fuck Dahyun, _fuck this town_. What anger that was once internal became physical. The steaming hot heat in his chest began to ooze out through his skin in thick waves. The water that had sloshed around him was nothing but a thick steam and Changbin felt hot. His skin burned and curled and preened, But Changbin had never felt more alive as he snapped his fiery eyes open to bore into his father’s horrified ones. Changbin slowly lifted himself out of the tub with a thick cloud of steam and not an ounce of water in sight as his father backed away. The church house was quiet.

 

“And yet, look at what your god created,” Changbin murmured before leaving, sparing Dahyun one final look that made them both squirm and look away. So this was the end, huh? No one followed after him, no one stopped him. Changbin just walked down that middle aisle, ignoring the phones risen in the air obviously recording him and slamming open the doors and walking out without another word to the community behind him. They left him behind, so he’ll leave them behind.

 

Right outside the church was Jisung, grinning wickedly in the driver's seat of Changbin’s car, and the elder rushed over, climbing into the passenger's seat. “Drive,” Changbin ordered, looking behind him to make sure his father didn’t follow after him, and luckily the man hadn’t even exited the church until Jisung rounded the corner. “Jisung…” Changbin trailed off in a giddy tone, and the younger seemed equally as giddy. “Jisung, sweetheart, look at me,” Changbin hushed our quietly, lifting himself up in his seat and waiting for the younger to reach a point where he could look over. As soon as Jisung’s eyes were on Changbin, the elder’s palms snapped up before he jolted and fire erupted along his fingers, a weak flame But a start. It took Jisung a second to register what he was seeing but once he did, he laughed brightly.

 

“Holy shit, Hyung,” Jisung breathed out, watching the orange flames dance across his lover’s fingers and when they got to a stop light, Jisung pulled him in by the tie and pressed a deep, but short kiss to Changbin’s lips, “Welcome, baby. I’m glad you’re embracing who you are,” their lips nudged together lightly, grazing and threatening to connect but jumped apart when there was a sudden honk from behind them. Jisung started driving again and then they fell into a comfortable silence, Changbin sinking back into his seats and breathing deeply. “Your clothes are right there if you want to change, Hyung,” Jisung pointed back to the duffle bag in the back seat and Changbin cried out in relief. The older teenager grabbed for it, almost hitting Jisung upside the head and sending them into a fit of laughter. Even as he was digging around and grabbing clothes to change into, Changbin was laughing hysterically and neither one really understood why.

 

They were just… so ungodly overwhelmed at the time. _Changbin was free._ “My handsome man,” Jisung purred when Changbin slipped his button up down his shoulders to reveal a bare torso. “If I weren’t driving right now, we’d be celebrating…” Jisung trailed off but Changbin scoffed.

 

“Oh hell no. We are not ruining my precious car,” Jisung raised his hands up in the air defensively.

 

“Alright, Alright,” Jisung laughed, keeping his eyes on the road respectively when Changbin slipped off his shoes and pants to pull on a pair of sweatpants and slides over his fancy, patterned socks. Changbin looked back at the seats, seeming a little dejected by not having anything soft for him to lay against but Jisung seemed to sense this. He reached down between his legs, pulling out a neck pillow and Changbin curled his nose up in confusion, “don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to, Hyung,” Jisung answered before the elder could even think to actually question the younger teenager, but Changbin broke out into giggles nonetheless. “Now, get comfortable, yeah? We’ve got a long road ahead of us,” Jisung advised, patting his lover’s thigh with a grin but not expecting Changbin to take it last second and hold it firmly.

 

They didn’t say anything more, and it didn’t take long for Changbin to drift off to sleep.

  
  
  
  
[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1097543112807845889?s=20)]  
  



	7. WHITE BLANK PAGE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "A white blank page and a swelling rage, rage
> 
> You did not think when you sent me to the brink, to the brink
> 
> You desired my attention but denied my affections, my affections,"

July 2018

 

Everything was just so… _overwhelming_.

 

Jisung’s mind was an absolute jumbled mess of nothing but Changbins’ face, their future together, and the burns in the elder’s palms. Everything had happened so fast, none of it was supposed to happen to begin with. Jisung was just supposed to visit the town, see Changbin, get the information he needed, and then leave. Changbin’s parents were never supposed to find out about them, much less Changbin was never supposed to come with Jisung after finally experiencing what it was like to hold true power. None of this was supposed to happen but he couldn’t bring himself to be even slightly irritated. They weren’t sure what they were to each other exactly, they were dating, yeah, but there was something else there. Something deeper and more meaningful.

 

At the end of the day, Jisung would never fully stop loving Eric, but Jisung knew deep down in his heart that he would love Changbin more than he ever loved Eric as time passed and he was okay with that. He hadn’t even been paying attention to his hand acting on its own accord and slipping onto Changbin’s thigh as the elder slept in the seat next to him, and Jisung sighed in content. The elder stirred at Jisung’s light, feather-like touches to his thighs, but never woke up as Jisung immediately stopped and cupped the skin in hopes of coaxing him back to sleep. It worked every single time but eventually, Jisung just let the elder sink into deep sleep without any disturbances. “You’re cute, Seo Changbin,” Jisung uttered under his breath fondly, pressing a warm kiss to Changbin’s knuckles.

 

“So are you, Han Jisung,” Changbin grunted out, moving so his body was turned towards the window and Jisung yelped, slapping weakly at Changbin’s shoulder.

 

“Asshole! I thought you were asleep!” Jisung screeches, hitting the elder a few more times but Changbin grabbed his arm gently to put his hand back on the wheel.

 

“You were tickling me, baby, how was I supposed to stay asleep?” Changbin’s voice was groggy and thick from sleep, and entirely alluring prompting Jisung to grip the wheel tightly. “How much longer?” Changbin sighed out, flinching a bit when the rain began to fall at a more rapid pace.

 

“Erm… an hour and a half maybe? But I might pull over because of this rain. I hate driving when it’s pouring like this,” Jisung admitted shyly, and Changbin nodded.

 

“Do what you need to do, baby,” and then it was quiet inside the car. Changbin was slowly lulled off to sleep by the light tumble of rain against the roof and the soft music he put on before he relaxed back into his seat. Jisung hummed along, lightly tapping his fingers against the steering wheel in hopes of taking his mind off of the rain and how anxious it made him. Eventually, and very much to Jisung’s relief, they arrived at the next exit and Jisung found a small parking garage on the outside of town where they could be away from the rain and sit in actual silence for a while. However, it was getting too stuffy in this car and Jisung could only handle so much of it before he got out and dug around in Changbin’s trunk until he found a towel to put on the hood.

 

Jisung climbed onto the warm surface, purring a bit at the warmth against his backside and looking off into the distance. So much has happened in such a short period of time. Sure, a year for a teenager felt like a long time but for him, it felt like he blinked. Though he guessed when days tended to bleed together from lack of sleep or too much of it, that time wouldn’t feel nearly the same. It was hard to keep moving forward, to keep going when it felt like everything was going to go wrong or that there wasn’t a purpose anymore. But _he_ held him up. _He_ hooked his arms underneath Jisung when he was about to fall and kept him stable. _He_ had become important in Jisung’s life and he had no idea how to approach this mess of a situation.

 

It made him want to tear his hair out but he kept his fingers resting on the cooling car top.

  
  


And that’s what Changbin woke up to. It took him a few minutes to fully open his eyes and keep them open, but he realized that the car was off and the rain was not as loud as it had been before. Then, he looked forward and saw Jisung sitting on the hood of his car and smiled fondly. Even from the back, Jisung was still gorgeous. The boy wasn’t the broadest person alive, but his shoulders still lured Changbin’s lips to them. It didn’t help that the elder knew they were littered with tiny moles and dimples that Changbin longed to connect and make weird shapes. Jisung’s hair had gotten longer and was now a beautiful golden blonde and so soft Changbin’s fingers couldn’t help but itch with the need to run through the locks. And while Changbin absolutely adored looking at Jisung from afar, he adored touching him just a tiny bit more so climbed out of the car.

 

Jisung startled when he heard the car door creak open and close, snapping his head around to see Changbin approaching him with wild hair and playful but fond eyes before the elder climbed up onto the hood of the car. “Hey,” Changbin rasped, voice thick with sleep and eyes blinking softly in an effort to keep them open. Jisung hummed in greeting, going to rest his head against the elder’s shoulder before actually verbally greeting him.

 

“Hey,” A thick, but comfortable silence fell over them, and Changbin found himself nuzzling into the top of Jisung’s head and circling his arms tight around the younger’s body. Jisung smelled faintly of soap and peppermint and while it was an odd combination, it was addicting. The elder breathed in deeply, not to get the scent permanently implemented in his nose, but with the additional firmer tug of the younger’s body into his own, it was quite clear that the elder was just trying to really take in the younger’s presence as a whole. Changbin could barely register what had happened today. His head felt so foggy that he was surely up in the clouds right? But Jisung was the anchors to his feet that kept pulling him back down to Earth. “A lot has happened today, hasn’t it?” Jisung murmured quietly.

 

“Yeah,” Changbin breathed, moving so he had an arm draped across Jisung’s shoulder and he was able to really look at his burned palms. “I’m not entirely sure how to process it if I’m honest,” Changbin admitted, smiling a little more fondly when Jisung took Changbin’s larger hands into his tinier ones to trace his fingers along the burns in the middle of the elder’s palms. They were much more noticeable, stinging painfully with the need to be used again but Jisung’s tracing helped cool the burning skin and soothe the pain. “They’re so… _prominent_. It’s weird,” Changbin frowned in both dismay and confusion. Sure, Jisung had told him countless times what that meant but he would never understand why it had to be him.

 

“You know what that means, love. You’re strong.  You’re going to be even stronger,” The feeling of  Jisung’s fingertips along his palms never faded as he spoke. Not until he gripped the sides of Changbin’s hand to bring it up to his lips so Jisung could press loving kisses into the irritated skin. Changbin practically purred with every single kiss purely as they shot an icy feeling down his nerves and stroked the itch away. “You’re going to get to train with me for a while. You’re going to get to train without having to worry about someone seeing you and we can finally be together,” Jisung whispered, moving his head so he could press gentle kisses into Changbin’s cheek over and over again until the elder was shoving him away because it tickled.

 

Any other time, Jisung would have fought him a bit, would have tried to tickle him more but Jisung was tired and the sky was getting darker and darker as time passed. This was a moment of peace they didn’t want to abandon just yet. “And what is it that you’re not telling me?” Changbin wasn’t an idiot. He knew there was something that Jisung wasn’t telling him but he wasn’t angry about it. He remained soft-spoken and kind, even holding the younger a little more softly to let him know of that lack of anger or irritation. Nonetheless, Jisung still froze in his spot and refused to look Changbin in the eyes. Instead, he resulted in tracing circles into Changbin’s chest and nibbling on his lower lip. “It’s okay, baby, just tell me,” the coaxing worked for the most part, but Changbin could still see that Jisung was unnecessarily guarded.

 

“There will be someone joining us. Someone very important to me and I hope to you too,” Jisung hushed quietly, a meaning behind his words that Changbin didn’t pick up on. The elder quirked an eyebrow up and hummed for Jisung to continue. “Do you… do you remember the hooded man? From your dreams?” Changbin’s muscles tensed at the mention of the man. It had been a while since he had gotten to actually speak to the figure. Sure, he saw him a few weeks ago but he was simply there to give Changbin a warning. Not to sit down and talk him through his troubles or make him feel safe for a while. Changbin didn’t hate the figure, he thought _the figure hated Changbin_. “I’ve met him. I’ve been staying with him since I’ve left. And you’re going to get to meet him too,” Jisung peered up at Changbin with a flashy grin, but it faded when he saw the troubled gleam in his lover’s eyes. “Hey… what’s wrong? You always talked about how much you wanted to meet him.”

 

“What if he hates me, Jisung? He hasn’t spoken to me in ages,” Changbin huffed, burying his face into Jisung’s hair again to hide his face.

 

“Love… He doesn’t hate you. There’s a reason for everything he does but it is not my place to tell. I will allow him to tell you as it is he who needs to,” Jisung hushed, curling a hand back so it was resting on the back of Changbin’s head at an uncomfortable angle.

 

“What’s he like?”

 

“He’s…” Jisung trailed off with a fond smile, twiddling his thumbs, “He’s very kind. He insists that he has to take care of you, even when you think you don’t need it. He just wants to help people but he’s very… closed off? Cautious? There’s something wrong going on inside his head and I’ve been trying to figure out what it is but he’s basically a steel wall,” Jisung frowned and Changbin was becoming more intrigued.

 

“Is he dangerous?”

 

“To us? No. But to mankind? Very much so,” Jisung hummed as if it wasn’t something they had to be worried about. It was obvious Jisung admired him, maybe even looked up to him. “You two will get along great,”

 

“Why’s that, baby?”

 

“Because’ I’ve got both of you wrapped around my finger,” Jisung uttered smugly but breathed in sharply when Changbin trailed slowly down Jisung’s head with kisses until he reached behind the younger’s ear. Jisung didn’t go any higher in volume aside from a few squeaks and pants before Changbin pulled away from the pink skin with plusher lips. “Now that was uncalled for,” Changbin laughed out in amusement, patting Jisung’s head and pulling away.

 

“Come on. Let’s get this over with. I’m hungry,” Well, at least tried to anyway as Jisung grabbed Changbin last second and pull him between his legs.

 

“Finish what you started, hyung,”

  


Road trips with Jisung were something else entirely. One moment Jisung was as quiet as an ant, but then when a particular song came on, he’d start belting out the lyrics with no mercy for Changbin’s eardrums. It wasn’t as if Changbin really minded though. He missed Jisung’s bubbly personality more than he had originally thought and now he was nothing but a giddy mess as he watched Jisung belt out lyrics to a Got7 song. “Hyung! Sing with me!” Jisung screeched suddenly, taking a hand off the wheel to slap at Changbin’s arm until the elder’s stomach hurt with laughter.

 

“Baby! Be careful! It’s still raining!” Changbin pleaded through laughter, reaching out to take control of the steering wheel when they were about to swerve off the road. Jisung yelped and jumped in alert at that, hands going back down to the wheel in slight fear of getting into a crash and Changbin began to try and steady his breathing so he could calm down. “Thank you,” Changbin breathed out in amusement, shifting to turn the music down a little so they could hear themselves talk. “How much longer? We’ve been on the road for a while,” Changbin questioned, digging through the small plastic bag of gas station candy and pulling out some gummy bears for him to satisfy his hunger with. Jisung had stopped a little while ago apparently, but Changbin had been asleep both when the younger stopped and when he started back up again. Jisung couldn’t really say he was surprised when Changbin didn’t wake up until half an hour later. Changbin slept like a damn rock.

 

“Not too long. Less than an hour I think. And if you’re lucky, there will be food ready for us when we get there,” Jisung thumped his fingers against the steering wheel, humming along to the beat, and looking far too content with himself. “I hope it’s noodles. I could really go for some ramen right now,” Jisung sighed out in need, licking along his lips and looking a little dazed. Changbin’s eyes rolled into the back of his head at the younger. Changbin would never understand Jisung’s obsession with ramen. “Gummy bear me!” Jisung demanded, holding his mouth open but never taking his eyes off of the road. Changbin slipped two green gummy bears into Jisung’s mouth and Jisung made cute noises in content. God, Changbin missed him.

 

But then another pitfall of silence fell over them, and when they began to approach society again, a small town that Changbin didn’t even know existed, anxiety began to fold and melt around the inside of Changbin’s stomach. He had no idea what was going on in the world anymore, what was said or if people were looking for him. They had to change the license plates a little while ago but that didn’t mean he wasn’t terrified by the idea of having to be taken into custody or back to that nightmare of a town.

 

Perhaps the saddest part of all of this is that Changbin loved that town. He adored the community he grew up in because of how nice and kind they were to him. However, Changbin didn’t realize just how cruel they could be until he was outed and they dug their sharp claws into him to rip him apart. It was unfair and truthfully, terrifying. But Changbin turned his fear into anger, and if it hadn’t been for his unrelenting passion and anger at that moment, Changbin wouldn’t be here with Jisung. Instead, he would still be at home suffering through another beating that his parents insisted he needed while losing any and all friends he might have had. If Changbin had stayed, everything would have been ripped out from underneath him and a cold hard cell would become his new home. That was not a thought Changbin wanted but had nonetheless because it was true.

 

Changbin was snapped out of his trance when Jisung spoke up, “penny for your thoughts?”

 

“Am I safe?” Changbin inquired seriously, catching the younger a bit off guard. “Is where we’re going safe? Am I going to have to constantly be watching my back?” Truthfully, Jisung had absolutely no idea.

 

“You are safe with me okay? Perhaps where we’re going might not be safe in the future, but you are safe as long as you protect yourself. People like us… we have to be paranoid and cautious at all times. It sucks, it really does, but it’s something we have to get used to. Especially since we’re on watch. We have to stay hidden if we want to live,” Jisung hushed.

 

“Hiding isn’t living, Jisung,” Changbin grumbled, but Jisung took the elder’s hand in his own and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

 

“It is for us, my love,” and Changbin couldn’t argue with that. “I will try my best to make it where you are not miserable for the rest of your life. I will make sure you are at least able to enjoy the small things life has to offer,” Jisung promised, but Changbin realized that maybe this was all just one giant understanding. Though, he had to form the words in his head before he could actually say them out loud. He didn’t want this to possibly spiral into an argument.

 

“You know that as long as I’m with you I can enjoy myself right?” There are many ways to say I love you without meaning to, and that was Changbin’s way. He just didn’t quite know it at the time. Changbin watched Jisung’s expression morph into one of confusion and shock. It was as if Jisung hadn’t ever really thought about it. How could someone like Changbin be so happy with someone like Jisung? Changbin was glad he could read the younger so well because he never once voiced his concerns and Changbin most definitely saved that for later. There was no way Changbin would let Jisung think that he wasn’t valid enough to be with the elder.

 

“Then my job shouldn’t be too hard, hm?” Jisung joked.

 

“No… No, I suppose not.”

  


Changbin didn’t know what he was expecting but an old courthouse sure as hell wasn’t it. The outside looked about as run down as a house that had been abandoned for two lifetimes, the windows and doors boarded up with wood covered in slurs and drawings. “Is this stable?” Changbin was scared that the whole thing might collapse at any moment.

 

“Yeah. We went in and stabilized it a little more so the upstairs is now useable,” Jisung explained, pulling into the lot and driving around back where a small little get together era was. It faintly reminded Changbin of the one in the woods just much smaller and only meant for two or three people. “Ah, the fire’s lit. He must just be inside grabbing something,” Jisung explained before turning off the car. The whole backyard area was overgrown and littered with weeds, bushes, flowers, and trees. It really did resemble a forest and Changbin wondered why the courthouse was the only thing out here aside from a small shop across the street that looked equally as abandoned. “Come on. Help me get your thing so we can get you inside,” Jisung coaxed.

 

The rain had long stopped at this point, but it was the middle of the night and Jisung didn’t want to be out here for any longer than he had to. The boys popped the trunk, Changbin bending down to grab a few things from inside the seats while Jisung grabbed his duffle bag out from the trunk where a bunch of boxes was inside. Changbin didn’t recognize them, but they were all labeled ‘important’ or using English words. “Ah. Good, you’re back. I can put the ward back up now,” A familiar voice called out from behind them, and Jisung yelped in startlement. “Sorry, Jisung,” The voice apologized again, eyes burning into Changbin’s back, but the teen was too terrified to turn around and face him. Even after all this time, his voice made Changbin’s stomach roll with warmth. “And who might you be?” The figure feigned ignorance, but his voice was soft, _tender_.

 

“Hyung, it’s okay,” Jisung murmured to him from the back side of the car, locking eyes with the elder in hopes of coaxing him a bit. It worked.

 

Changbin took in a deep breath, shut the seats of his car, shut the door, and whirled around with a hoodie and a blanket in hand. In front of him was a man stood on the steps that lead up to the courthouse with silver hair that vaguely resembled a cloud, a kind smile that revealed dimples that made Changbin’s heart stutter, and silver eyes gleaming with recognition. No words were exchanged as the handsome man in the familiar hoodie trailed down the steps to approach Changbin. With his hand out for a handshake, he uttered in that same voice, “Bang Chan,” and Changbin thought he was going to burst into tears. There was no way Changbin was going to introduce himself to the same man who had been haunting his dreams for years and knew exactly who he was. No, because Changbin was going to hug him so tightly Jisung and Chan would have to pry him off using as much energy as they had.

 

Chan was obviously caught off guard by the rather aggressive hug, but slithered his arms around Changbin’s middle nonetheless and held him close. “You’re an asshole, Bang Chan,” Changbin grumbled, squeaking a bit internally when Chan hummed in amusement before patting his lower back.

 

“I’ll take your word for it, Seo Changbin,” Changbin couldn’t describe the feeling he got when his name rolled off of Chan’s tongue but he knew that if Jisung knew about it… there was no hard telling what kind of problems it could cause. Changbin beat his fists against Chan’s chest lightly, looking rather defeated if he were honest, but Chan didn’t fight it.

 

“You left me,” Changbin whimpered. Chan held him a little tighter at that, shooting Jisung a look over Changbin’s shoulder. The teen didn’t seem bothered by Chan and Changbin latching onto each other. In fact, his eyes oozed nothing but fondness and Chan felt a little more at ease. “You don’t hate me do you?” Silly, silly boy.

 

“Would I be hugging you if I did?” Chan hushed into his ear, and Changbin flushed at the feeling of his warm breath. The younger pulled away slowly, letting his hands linger on Chan’s neck for a moment. Though, he realized what was going on, who he was talking to, and who was behind him, and pulled away sharply. He backed away until Jisung met him in the middle the younger’s chest making contact with Changbin’s shoulder. “Come inside, both of you. Dinner is ready,” Chan’s back straightened, the mischievous glint in his eye falling and being replaced by a polite, but a serious one. Then, he swiveled around on his heel, palms behind him and on show for the younger to see as he trailed up the stairs and escaped inside. Changbin was about to start climbing the steps with Jisung’s hand on his back when he heard a very loud click and a boom, jumping in fright. Changbin looked all around them, and a dome was surrounding the lot. Changbin looked like he wanted to go and touch it but Jisung held him back.

 

“Don’t touch it. If you touch it while knowing it’s there, it could kill you. Chan hyung will give you a ring to help you pass through untouched,” Jisung explained softly and Changbin nodded with a gulp. The courthouse inside was much more put together and lived in. Surprisingly, the lights inside worked, giving off a warm glow. Though, when Changbin approached he realized that there were no light bulbs. It was just a floating ball of fire that was contained inside something clear, but a material that could handle the burning hot flames. Changbin was… entranced. Jisung placed his hand on Changbin’s back once more, curling it around his hip to guide him towards the kitchen where Chan was hovering over a hot plate with a pot of what looked like noodles. Jisung shrieked in excitement. “Thank you, hyung!” Jisung giggled, pressing a quick kiss to the eldest’s cheek. Chan just hummed in acknowledgment, but his cheeks did in fact flush.

 

“Sure, sung. I know you like them and these trips aren’t the best for you sometimes,” Jisung wasn’t lying when he claimed Chan liked to take care of people.

 

“I have the things you asked for…” Jisung trailed off. Changbin felt his body go rigid when Chan shot him a look before licking his lips and letting his eyes snap to Jisung.

 

“We’ll get them later. Show Changbin where he will be staying while I set the table,” Chan ordered, leaving no room for any sort of argument, and Jisung gulped. Changbin felt Jisung’s hand wrap around his wrist and drag him away from the kitchen. They trailed down a hallway until they reached a large courtroom, trailing across it and down another hallway Holy shit this place was massive. The other hallway was as clean as the first one, the floor a deep, heavy wood but a long purple carpet down the middle. Changbin was fascinated by all the odd objects sitting on the tables.

 

“What are all these?” Changbin questioned, but Jisung just sighed.

 

“I’m really bad at giving tours. I’m sure Chan will make the time for you. He’s really good about letting you explore as long as you don’t destroy anything,” Jisung explained with a meek smile.

 

“Have you broken something?” Changbin quirked an eyebrow up.

 

“We don’t talk about that,” Jisung pulled Changbin into the third room on the right, and the elder of the two was pleasantly surprised by how neat it was. In the corner, there was a full mattress sitting on the floor and covered in a thin sheet and fuzzy blankets at the foot. Along the opposing wall were wooden crates full of clothes and other weird items. And on the wall in front of them was a desk with a computer. Ah yes. How could Changbin forget? Jisung was a hacker for Christ’s sake. That was how he got his money. That was how he provided.

 

“This place is a lot neater than I had expected it to be,” Changbin commented, not really quite believing that this was Jisung’s doing.

 

“Chan is a bit of a clean freak so he cleans my room a lot,” Jising murmured and Changbin was about to turn around and walk out so he could hug Chan. He was glad someone other than him was willing to clean up Jisung’s mess. “We Have other rooms but uh… I was hoping you’d stay with me…” Jisung admitted shyly with his hand rubbing at the back of his neck. Changbin grinned from ear to ear, shifting forward to press a gentle peck to the other’s lips and then bolted towards the bed to face plant on top. Jisung laughed at his lover, climbing on top of his starfish form and matching the pose but draping across him. Changbin wanted to grunt and push him off but Jisung was warm and the night was becoming cold. It seemed that Jisung had the same thought. “Should I move?”

 

“If you move, you die,”

 

“What if Chan hyung comes in and forces me to move?”

 

“Then you both die,” Changbin snickered, and then took the younger’s arms to wrap around his neck before tugging the pillow closer to rest his head on top. The pressure on Changbin’s body felt nice and he really didn’t want the younger to move, but when knocks came at the door, the two were forced apart.

 

“Come on you two. It’ll get cold,” Chan called through the door, but when Jisung groaned and whined, the door opened abruptly. The two jumped a little but didn’t separate completely. They just shifted so they could both see him. “Seriously. I know you two are tired, but you need to eat,” Chan quipped, but his eyes were still soft and kind, and how were they supposed to say no to that? Sure, they could complain, but say no? Yeah, right.

 

“It’s so comfy, hyung,” Jisung whined, pouting cutely before snuggling his face into Changbin’s neck. Changbin saw it from a mile away and did nothing to stop it when Chan approached the two of them, gripped the back of Jisung’s neck and pulled him up as Jisung screeched like some sort of kitten, “Hyung!” Though the screeches died out and were replaced by gentle hums of content when Chan stroked where he had pinched along with the younger’s greasy hair.

 

“You need a bath,” Chan wrinkled his nose up in disgust, pulling his stretched out hand away and staring down at his palms. Changbin couldn’t see them but he could only imagine the marks on this man’s hands that most definitely traveled up his arms and across his body much like Jisung ’s grandfather’s did. “Get up, now,” Chan growled firmly, his words latching onto the two younger’s bodies and dragging them up and out. _Damn_ , was his power speech or something? Chan walked away with his shoulders slumped in exhaustion and eyes so soft that Changbin second guessed who was really in front of him. Was he specialized in speech? Or was he just naturally fit to shift into a person everyone loved?

 

“Shit, I forget how scary Hyung is sometimes,” Jisung grumbled under his breath, hand finding Changbin’s. “Come on,” Jisung hushed, and tugged Changbin back down the hallway and through the courtroom where Chan had just escaped through. Suddenly, Jisung’s stomach began to grumble and growl in earnest, craving the very idea of food and Changbin smirked to himself.

 

“Hungry, baby?” Changbin teased, his free hand reaching out to swirl circles into his stomach. Jisung growled under his breath, batting Changbin’s hands away before they entered the small kitchen. Chan was hovered over the counter, pouring the food contents into three small bowls before sticking chopsticks inside each one of them. No words were exchanged between the three of them as Chan shoved bowls into both of their hands and sent them off towards the table against the window. They had a perfect view of the outside, and Changbin took in a shocked gasp when he saw the river nearby. It was beautiful. The water gave off a beautiful white crystal gleam, and the thick fogging clouding over the surface formed dancing figures, women dancing with men as flowers flew all around them and it was gorgeous.

 

“It’s ethereal, isn't it? The fog changes almost every night but this scene is by far my favorite,” The breath of the youngest traveled down his neck and Changbin practically melted into it. The warmth of it felt gentle and kind but a part of it also told the elder that Jisung was there and he wasn’t leaving anytime soon. “Chan claimed the river has a mind of its own but I think -” Jisung cut himself off with his own yelp, not expecting Chan’s hand to land on the back of his neck and squeeze it in warning.

 

“Because it _does_ , Jisung. Every river has a mind of its own,” Chan explained in exasperation, and Changbin giggled at the thought of Chan having to explain this to Changbin’s lover often. “Now sit down and eat, Sung,” Chan ordered softly into Jisung’s ear, grip softening into one that was barely there but still made shivers course up Jisung’s spine. Chan’s touch was rare but somehow the man knew exactly how to make Jisung melt under a singular ghost touch. It was a scary thought really because Changbin could do the same but he had to learn. It seemed Chan knew without having to be taught. “Everything around here has a mind of its own… sometimes you just have to give it a nudge,” Chan’s eyes flickered to Changbin, a not so secret meaning behind his eyes and Changbin found himself looking away with flushed cheeks.

 

Changbin had a mind of his own, he knew that, but Chan had to be one to give him a little nudge in the right direction. To open Changbin’s eyes to what he was capable of. What the symbols burned into his hands meant. Changbin almost forgot about his food for a moment, staring down at his palms as the backs of his hands rested on his lower thighs. It had taken Jisung slipping his hand into Changbin’s to snap him out of it, to have Changbin’s eyes lifting up to meet Jisung’s own before a gentle whisper escaped the younger’s ears, “You okay?” It was so quiet it was barely heard over the low rumble of the storm brewing outside and the white noise of the fire crackling and Chan’s loud eating. Chan would have heard it from a mile away but he acted as if he were too enveloped into his food to notice the other’s conversation. Chan was known for having a habit of eavesdropping.

 

“I’m fine, baby,” Changbin hushed back, leaning forward to feather a discreet, silent kiss to Jisung’s cheek that lasted a fraction of a second. Nonetheless, Jisung purred at the contact and focused back on his food, Changbin doing the same. The man tried his best to ignore the itch in his palms, the need and want to release the fire in his belly and chest. The utter and complete need to cause chaos. Changbin had been quiet, calm, and soothing for far too long. He needed loud. He needed terror. He needed destruction. _Changbin needed chaos._ Chan was always a bit too observant for his own good, and he noticed when Changbin began to react to the itch. When Changbin began to clutch the metal chopsticks tightly to suppress the want for the time being. “Excuse me for a moment,” Changbin coughed out, letting the chopsticks clang against the bowl, and letting the chair screech loudly against the wood of the floor.

 

Jisung’s and Chan’s eyes flickered to the chopsticks rolling around the mouth of the bowl, scorch marks against the now bent and slightly melted metal and Jisung shot Chan a concerned look. Chan slipped a hand onto Jisung’s shoulder to keep him down in his chair as they watched Changbin escape out the door and trail down the hallway to god knows where. “Let him be. The place is fireproof so he can’t do too much damage,” Chan reassured, “He needs to get it out of his system. I could feel his heart sizzling all the way from over here,” The way the elder spoke was as if he didn’t feel everything the universe had to offer from the other side of the world but Jisung kept his mouth shut for the time being. Instead, he just watched the door with a bouncing knee and waiting for Changbin to come back through the door with a cooler touch and a content heart.

 

“I don’t think he’s ready, Chan Hyung,”

 

“We will just have to see,”

 

But Changbin only got hotter and hotter in body temperature as time passed, and he was afraid that if he got any hotter, his hair would burn to a damn crisp. Why did this have to be him? Why did Changbin have to be so different from everyone else? Why couldn’t he have been home with Dahyun and watching movies after a really long study session? Changbin wanted his life back, but as much as he wanted it back, Changbin realized that what was back home… was not home. What was back home was the finest version of hell for him, and Changbin was now living in heaven even if he hadn’t quite realized that last part yet.

 

The man barely registered the flames dancing up his arms, but when he heard the crackle and pop of flames reaching his ears when his hands stretched up to clutch into his hair, Changbin whimpered loudly. Just like the very first dream he had, the very first dream where Chan had wormed his way in, fire danced along Changbin’s fingers, hugged his palms, and curled around his forearms like a snake. Changbin could almost make out the snakehead through the fire, hissing when Changbin finally met it’s beady, four crystal blue eyes amongst its orange scales. It was just about to lick up his elbows when there was a voice. A calming, familiar voice. “ _Just let it out, Changbin,_ ” Chan thundered around him, but Chan was nowhere to be seen when Changbin whirled around in fright. “ _Control_ ,” Changbin was far from having control over the flames circling his arms and that only seemed to worsen the flames when he realized it.

 

“I-I can’t -” He didn’t know what he was unable to do anymore. Changbin was unable to let the fire breathe and release into the thick waves they so desperately wanted, but he was unable to control it and will it to go away or stay in this broken state either.

 

“ _You can,_ ” Chan thundered once more, forceful reassurance swaddling Changbin like thick ice. Changbin began to blubber and weep in hunched over position, legs stood rigid as he appeared like a statue in the middle of the hallway. “ **_Control, Changbin,_ **” The fire began to appear at his toes and travel up his feet and legs. Changbin looked like he was on fire, but for a moment, he was at peace. For one millisecond, it felt like Changbin and the fire was one entity.

 

And that one millisecond was all he needed.

 

The fire all around his body swirled around his body at lightning speed until it all reached his throat, escaping through the pores and illuminating a thick, white and yellow glow inside his skin. Tears began to spring in Changbin’s eyes at the fire ranting and raving in his throat and with one, final shrill scream that seemed to last for an entire lifetime, the dragon made of fire raced out from the opening of his mouth and escaped the enclosure of Changbin’s soul. The dragon bounced off the walls, an entirely new entity, a new creature to add to the endless collection the universe harbored. All until Chan caught it between his palms and Changbin went tumbling to his knees.

 

It was quiet for a few seconds aside from Changbin’s coughs, whimpers, and heavy panting. “I told you he wasn’t ready!” Jisung hissed suddenly, racing down the hall to reach Changbin and kneel beside him. Changbin didn’t think twice about melting into Jisung’s arms, resting his burning hot head on his chest. The odd part was that Changbin was not sweaty. He didn’t feel clammy. It felt like all those times he went to the beach and how his thighs felt being exposed to the sun but it was the same sensation all over. He felt weak, _vulnerable_.

 

Chan didn’t utter a word, only taking the dragon and forcing it down so small it could be enclosed by his palms and letting it morph and form into Changbin’s safe haven. With a final click, Chan let the new creature barrel towards Changbin, a small, puppy-like animal covered in feathers and had wings on it’s back. Its tongue made of pure ice was hanging out of its mouth, clawing its way up Changbin’s thigh and standing up on his chest to trace the tongue all over Changbin’s face, leaving behind a nice sensation on his burning hot skin. Jisung stared in bewilderment, flickering his eyes up to the elder who stood on the other side of the hall with his arms crossed over his chest and studying Changbin with a concerned, but proud expression. “Are you okay, Changbin?”

 

The teen in question looked towards Chan with a slow drawl of his eyes, but he looked content and satisfied in the state he was in. How couldn’t he be? He practically had a cute puppy on top of him trying to will the heat away from his skin as he leaned back into his lover’s chest. His body felt limp and practically useless at the time but he is satisfied, to say the least. The burn in his chest was not as intense now and Changbin could sleep peacefully that night. “Yeah, hyung. Thank you,” Changbin grinned lazily, and Chan offered the younger his own soft smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

 

“If you two need anything, just come and ask. I’m going to clean up and head to my study for the night,” Chan formally bowed and waltzed away with his hands clutched behind him and all the two teens could do was stare. Chan was an interesting character that was for sure, but they couldn’t help but feel the need to know everything about him. Changbin wanted to know where Chan came from, what he was, _who_ he was. Perhaps one day he would know, but for now, he wanted to get to know Chan for who he was _now_.

 

“Okay, Hyung. Sleep well,” Jisung called out in a soft tone before Chan could round the corner, and it felt like the air inside their lungs escaped for a singular moment when the eldest’s pale, foggy blue eyes met their own brown ones. Chan’s lips quirked up, cupid’s bow stretching the slightest bit, and the two teens began to squirm in their seats.

 

“You too,”

 

Jisung lifted Changbin up in the air, holding him like Changbin was a ragdoll and the ice, feather, bird puppy creature landed on his chest with a yip. “Careful. I don’t want to hurt it,” Changbin scowled, picking up the small creature and tugging it close to his chest. Jisung rolled his eyes.

 

“You better not get used to how small it is now. It’ll be the size of an English Mastiff by tomorrow night. I can’t believe Hyung had to turn your first breath into a _Fromika_ of all things,” Jisung wasn’t angry, not even irritated, just slightly disbelieving that Chan had decided to turn it into such a large creature. Changbin peered up at him in curiosity, and Jisung flushed in embarrassment, “Right… I forget you don’t know as much as we do yet. A fromika is a creature that is supposed to help you be content at all hours of the day. When you are feeling too overheated, it’ll develop into ice to cool you down and when you’re feeling too cold, it’ll burst into flames and warm you up. It’s here to help you but they get very large very quickly. It’ll be the size of an orca by the time it dies,” Jisung explained and Changbin stared down at the creature with wide eyes.

 

“It is yours, but you have to give it a name,” Changbin had never had an animal companion. His parents didn’t like cats and dogs were too much work for their busy schedules. They allowed him a singular beta fish when he was 6 and Changbin cared for it until he couldn’t anymore. His parents had flushed the fish when they realized his attention was being spent more on the animal than his bible studies. Changbin cried himself to sleep for three whole days after that until Dahyun got a cat and he found a new excuse to go over to her house all the time.

 

“Hm…” Changbin trailed off in thought, holding the creature up so it was eye level with Changbin and it panted and yipped in excitement. “How about Yuna? You have to endure me right?” The fromika didn’t seem to object to it by any means and Changbin cooed when her tongue dipped out to lick at his thumb and brought Yuna close to his chest with a giggle. “You’re a cutie,” Jisung giggled at the two but huffed dramatically to get the elder’s attention. “What, Ji?” Changbin questioned with fondness clear in his tone and Jisung tried his best not to stutter over his words as he entered the room and lowered Chan down on his bed with Yuna still on the elder’s chest.

 

“You’re going to want to give Yuna more affection than me,” Jisung whined, and Changbin broke out into weak laughter. With a limp hand, Changbin reached up slowly to grab Jisung’s hand and pull him down a bit. Jisung didn’t hesitate to kneel down so he could hover his face over the elder’s and Changbin couldn’t help but grin to himself. _God_ , Jisung was so beautiful.

 

“Come here, baby,” Their lips molded together for a soft, prolonged peck, the two sighing out through their noses as they melted into the other. Changbin was too weak to do much, so pushed the hand on Jisung’s cheek down a bit in hopes of him getting the message. Thankfully, both Yuna and Jisung seemed to get the message as Yuna moved off of Changbin’s chest quickly to jump off the bed and explore the room as Jisung lowered himself on top of the elder, lips locking for a few more seconds before separating. “You’re so beautiful,” Changbin hushed lovingly, running his pointer finger along the apple of Jisung’s cheek as they studied one another. Originally, Jisung had both his hands resting on either side of Changbin’s head but his arms were beginning to give out so he shifted his legs so they were on either side of the teen’s hips and he was better supported.

 

“Says you, hyung,” Jisung breathed, stretching his back for a moment and practically towering over the elder. Changbin laughed weakly, dropping his hands so they were rested on Jisung’s thighs before rubbing the skin a bit. “I need a shower, love, and I need to treat these wounds,” Jisung hushed before Changbin could tug him down into another kiss and Changbin pouted. “I hate seeing you like this. It just reminds me of everything that’s happened,” Jisung admitted, climbing off of Changbin and pulling him up so the elder was leaning up against the headboard.

 

“It’s okay, baby. You know that. It’s behind us now,”

 

“Yeah… and now we have new problems to deal with,” Jisung huffed, trailing into the bathroom. Changbin didn’t have the energy to dwell on what that all meant, just simply sinking into the headboard and petting the Fromika curled up against his side. Changbin’s eyes fluttered at the sound of rushing water hitting a porcelain tub, but as soon as arms hooked under his body, Changbin’s eyes flew open with a loud yelp leaving his lips, “Come on. You’re still not cooled down,” And then his shirt and pants were gently peeled from him before his body was lowered into the tub. Changbin felt like he was slowly gaining feeling in his body again so he was all red cheeks and flaming hot embarrassment as Jisung seemed entirely unbothered by the situation.

 

“Stop being weird, hyung,”

 

“Shut the fuck up, Jisung,” Changbin snapped back with a weak croak that held no bite, and all Jisung could do was laugh a bit as he wet the man’s hair before rubbing shampoo into his scalp. Jisung helped Changbin to the best of his ability, being careful of where he placed his hands and letting Changbin wash certain parts of himself before it was Jisung’s turn to bathe. Jisung grabbed a fluffy, emerald green towel and wrapped it firmly around Changbin’s slender build firmly. Changbin’s hair was dripping, and his left eye was no longer swollen shut but still incredibly purple and puffy around the edges. With one final attempt of support to get Changbin out of the tub, the elder was trailing into the bedroom where Yuna was no longer a cool ice but a warm, tan neutral, but the moment he shivered, her feathers burst into flames and now she was nothing but a ball of heat to warm up the room almost instantly.

 

The warmth felt nice against Changbin’s skin and even helped him dry off a bit as he slipped on a purple t-shirt with tiny holes in it and broth stains all over, a pair of black sweatpants, and fuzzy socks with donuts all over them that most definitely belonged to Jisung. Changbin slipped under the covers of Jisung’s black, furry blanket and Yuna quickly went back to her neutral body temperature to curl up against Changbin’s side underneath the blanket. “Don’t get too comfortable! I still have to treat your wounds,” Jisung called out suddenly, and Changbin let out a loud groan that only got a bit louder when he heard Jisung lower himself in the water. Unfortunately for Changbin, he dozed off rather quickly, leaving him in the predicament he was in now.

 

Changbin woke up with a hiss and a pressure on his hips. Jisung was straddling his hips like he had done earlier, but this time he had the first aid kit with him and had a bloodied q-tip in hand when Changbin opened his eyes. “I told you not to get comfortable, asshole,” Jisung grumbled when Changbin gaped up at him, gripping the elder’s jaw firmly and cleaning his wounds to the best of his ability. Occasionally, the man would wince and squirm under Jisung’s body when the alcohol stung or Jisung applied too much pressure to the bandages he placed. “Alright, I’m done,” Jisung sighed, tugging Changbin’s shirt down, planting a kiss to his forehead, and getting up off of Changbin to put everything away. His dyed blond hair was still dripping onto his gray hoodie that barely showed the black boxer shorts Jisung had insisted on wearing, and Changbin was not going to let him anywhere near this bed until he dried it. “Hyung,” Jisung whined out in dismay.

 

“No! It’s wet and I don’t want your hair dripping down my damn neck!” Changbin huffed, and what Changbin wanted, Jisung had to provide. So, with one final whine of dismay, Jisung grabbed a towel and began to furiously rub at his hair until Changbin was giggling at the sight. When the younger pulled the towel away, his hair was a half-dry mess , Jisung sniffling in unamusement. “Cute. Now come here,” Jisung ran full force forward, the elder yelping loudly expecting Jisung to land on top of him but instead landed beside him and curled an arm around Changbin’s waist to pull the teen closer to his chest. “I missed you,” Changbin admitted shyly after a few moments of silence, and Jisung’s eyes lit up.

 

“I missed you too, hyung,” Jisung pressed a firm kiss to the back of Changbin’s neck, curling his arms around his torso a bit tighter and burying his cheek into the elder’s shoulder. “Can I ask you a question?”

 

“Only if I get to ask you one too,” Changbin struck a deal, and Jisung laughed warmly, nodding his head in confirmation. Changbin grinned, flopping around like a fish until his head was rested on the pillow and now facing Jisung. “Ask away, baby,”

 

“All those years ago… when we were kids,” Jisung started, reaching out to grasp Changbin’s hands under the covers and Changbin ran his thumb across Jisung’s knuckles in a comforting manner, “I was an asshole to you yet you called a truce with me anyway and became my best friend. Why? I was everything you were told to stay away from but you kept nearby anyway,” Jisung’s teeth latched onto his bottom lip in fear of what Changbin’s answer would be. Jisung prayed to the heavens above that Changbin wasn’t trying to use or correct Jisung in any way.

 

Changbin hummed in thought, lifting himself up so he was propped up on his elbow and the side of his head was resting in his palm. “I’m not really sure what the exact reason was but… despite you being the person everyone didn’t want me to be around, I felt like I needed to be, and you looked like you just needed a friend. So, I thought why not?” Changbin shrugged, leaning forward and letting his body rest back on the mattress and pressing their foreheads together, “And that was the best decision I’ve ever made,” Jisung’s cheeks flushed, but the two exchanged a sweet kiss without much thought.

 

“I’m glad you decided to give me a chance, hyung. So, go grafetful,” Jisung whimpered slightly, and Changbin cooed when he saw the younger’s glossy eyes.

 

“Don’t cry, baby. There’s no reason to cry,” Changbin scolded gently, wiping away the three stray tears that managed to break over the barrier of Jisung’s eyes. Jisung nodded and gulped, burying his head into Changbin’s neck and letting the elder’s skin soak up Jisung’s remaining tears.

 

“What was your question, hyung?” Jisung croaked when he pulled away, sniffling a bit but looking a bit exhausted as well. Changbin seemed unsure to ask his question now, and Jisung didn’t like that. Not one bit, “Hey, it’s okay. Just ask me. I won’t get upset,” Jisung reassured, and Changbin found himself huffing in slight dismay.

 

“Promise?”

 

“Promise.”

 

Changbin took in a deep breath, “Was I a rebound? From Eric?” Jisung flinched back at the mention of his first love combined with the question. Jisung knew how bad it looked in the long run. He had thought about it many, many times over the year they’ve been apart, and he could answer that with some confidence. Even if it hurt to still think about Eric.

 

“Hyung, I will always love Eric. Period,” Changbin sucked in a harsh breath at that, watching Jisung sit up and cross his legs as he played with his thumbs nervously, “But you were never a rebound. I think I was blind during those last few months I was with Eric and I refused to acknowledge my feelings for you,” Jisung looked like he was too overwhelmed with words at the time and began to choke on his own spit. So, Changbin sat up as well, crossing his legs and scooting forward until their knees touched and Changbin could comfortably reach for Jisung’s hands and hold them in his own. His eyes told Jisung to slow down, breathe, and take his time, “My love for you has grown a lot stronger than the one I have for Eric currently. As upsetting as it is, Eric is my _past_ , and you are my _now_ ,” Changbin surged forward and clasped their lips together in a desperate kiss.

 

They poured everything they had into that kiss until they couldn’t breathe anymore. But Changbin couldn’t deny the fact that despite the fire burning in his chest, it felt like something was missing, “Can I admit something to you?” Changbin breathed out shyly, and Jisung hummed in confirmation, “All throughout the time we’ve been together, it felt like something was missing. At first, I thought it was just all the time we’ve lost to be together that was playing with me, but now that I’m with you…” Changbin trailed off, fearful he wasn’t wording anything right, “I don’t mean to say I _don’t_ want to be with you, but I just feel like I need more…” Changbin was so scared now. Scared he had just fucked everything up because he thought for a second he could tell Jisung anything.

 

“Like we need another person?” Changbin flushed, ignoring the fact that Jisung said ‘we’ and nodded his head like it was some sort of crime. Jisung let out a breath of deep relief prompting Changbin to snap his head up and stare at the younger in shock. Did he…? “I’m glad we’re on the same page, hyung… I was feeling the same way,” Changbin let out a laugh in delight, falling back onto the bed and sinking into the mattress. It felt like a weight was lifted off of his shoulders. “We’ll talk about it a little more thoroughly another time. Is there anything else?”

 

“Chan hyung is cute,”

 

“Glad to know we have the same taste, hyung,”

  
  
  


The wet mildew of the early morning grass felt nice against Changbin’s skin, softened by the water so they didn’t dig so harshly into his skin. Yuna, now the size of a small adult bear a week after getting her, was curled up on the ground underneath Changbin’s head and providing a comfortable pillow for the teen to use as he rested his eyes for a few moments. Changbin didn’t get much sleep these days, no longer dragged into the dream world Chan put him in that made him feel well rested in the morning, So, more times than not in the last week was he awake just as the sun was rising with Yuna beneath him as they laid out in the backyard where it was quiet and Jisung snore-free. “Mind if I join?” A warm, familiar voice chimed from above Changbin, and the younger peeled them open to see Chan in a black sweater, gray sweatpants, and a pair of old converses.

 

“Go ahead,” Changbin hushed, letting his eyes flutter shut and hearing Chan settled on the grass beside him. It was quiet for the most part with the occasional page flip from Chan and Yuna’s grunts as she shifted under Changbin’s head. It was only when Chan began to snicker lightly at whatever he was reading that Changbin peeled his eyes open and studied the elder for a moment, “What are you laughing at, hyung?” He questioned out of curiosity, Chan turning back towards him for a moment.

 

“Ah, don’t worry about it,” Chan waved him off with a grin and Changbin spared him a pout until they just fell into a relaxed silence with their eyes never leaving the other, “How are you doing, Changbin?” Chan questioned after a moment of silence, scooting over a bit and Changbin felt his heart race at the sight of the sleep ridden elder this close up.

 

“I’m fine, hyung. Thanks for asking,” Changbin grinned, going to get up and tell Chan to get back to his book but Chan curled a hand into his hair and began to twirl the locks around his fingers as if he knew exactly what he was doing to the younger, “Mind if I ask a question?” Changbin questioned.

 

“Ask away, Binnie,” Chan hushed.

 

“Why’d you leave?”

 

Chan didn’t seem at all caught off guard by the question, never stopping his scratches against Changbin’s scalp nor letting the content, fond quirk of his lips drop, “I’m sorry for leaving, doll,” Chan apologized first, but it was clear he wasn’t done talking yet, “I just got… a little worried. I’ve been seeing these events happen for years and yet as soon as you come into the picture nothing happens as how it should and now I'm blind to what is supposed to happen to the world,” Chan uttered, words vague and sometimes a little not understandable, and Changbin was craving the knowledge in Chan’s brain. He was craving every story linked to this man.

 

“Who are you, Chan?”

 

“Maybe I will tell you one day, but not now. That is a very long story,” Chan left no room for arguments and Changbin nodded solemnly, lowering his head onto Yuna’s tummy and stroking her feathers lazily.  

 

“Why us, Chan? Why did it have to be us?”

 

“What? Our powers?”

 

“Yeah,”

 

“Doll, everyone is capable of something. Me, you, Jisung, and the millions of others out there,” Chan hushed, leaning down to ghost his lips across Changbin’s forehead as his hand traveled down to Changbin’s and held it carefully, provoking the smallest of shivers as he gently traced the burns into Changbin’s hands that were slowly crawling up his arms with feather-like touches. Chan seemed to know exactly how to get anyone to melt underneath him, to make anyone feel safe in his presence. “This power only awakens in those truly angry at the world. The need for change has to be strong enough that it changes something inside of you as well,”

 

“But now the world knows… is this the end for us? Is this how the world ends? During a bloody war?”

 

“This is not the ending, Changbin. This is only the beginning. The start of something new. The world must change. If it didn’t need to, then the power wouldn’t have sparked inside you,” Chan began to trace the markings again, but this time with his lips before he let them ghost by Changbin’s ear again. Chan couldn’t get enough of the way Changbin shivered underneath him despite them both feeling a few days earlier that they had to start with a fresh new plate, even if they ultimately started right where they left off. Chan knew Changbin better than anyone in the universe aside from Han Jisung, and he knew how to get the fire sparkling inside him again.

 

“You are meant to do great things, Seo Changbin,”

  
  
  
  
[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1100082972663971841?s=20)]  
  
  
  
  
  



	8. I GAVE YOU ALL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Close my eyes for a while, Force from the world a patient smile, But I gave you all”

November 2018

 

Ignorance is far from bliss. Staying hidden inside a bubble shielded away from the world can cause more than enough hatred _for_ that bubble, even if it there with good intentions such as protection, a promise of growth, and/or providing a home for those inside. However, not knowing what is going on all around you is not ideal, even if Changbin had experienced that for most of his life. If anything, after being exposed to the world and seeing everything that was wrong with it, it is hard to let go of that all over again. It’s a sense of power, a sense of control in this shit storm of a life he has, and now that he is unable to know where his name stands in the public and if people like him should be fearing for their lives is frightening.

 

Chan and Changbin weren’t allowed to leave the bubble. Jisung was the only link they had to the real world as of now and Changbin couldn’t quite understand why Chan wasn’t allowed to leave either, but he guessed it had something to do with the endless, dark tattoos that trailed up his arms that Changbin had only been allowed a glimpse of so far. Perhaps the worst part was that Jisung would be gone for days at a time with no solid way of communicating to the other two to let them know he was okay, so everytime Jisung left for a few days, Changbin was left a jittery mess who was practically useless to Chan.

 

Though Changbin had to give the man credit. Chan was incredibly patient with Changbin and never got frustrated or mad at the younger for being useless around the place during the time, and on an even brighter note, Chan had claimed one time after Jisung left that he would have let Changbin go with him if he hadn’t been fearful for the public looking for Changbin. “It’s just unfair, Hyung,” Changbin whined loudly in the middle of dinner one evening. They hadn’t been eating in the dining hall but instead outside where the breeze was warm and the dancing woman on top of the lake smiled and beamed at them in celebration of a clear, warm summer’s night. “I feel like I’m being locked inside a cell,” Chan quirked an eyebrow up at that.

 

“Yeah… a cell where you have fields to run in safely and a warm bed,” The man hadn’t sounded angry at Changbin, Chan was simply amused at the boy’s lack of appreciation for what he _did_ have. The boy gaped at him in shock, “What? You didn’t know about the fields?” The way Changbin’s eyes lit up in both excitement in curiosity prompted Chan’s stomach to roll and heart to stammer, but he managed to keep himself together for the most part. So, when Changbin shook his head in earnest, Chan set his bowl of rice and chicken aside and got up off of the steps they were sitting on. “Come on,” Changbin stared at the outstretched hand for a moment, obviously curious as to what Chan was showing him but didn’t hesitate to put his bowl to the side for Yuna to eat out of and take the elder’s hand.

 

Thoughts and possibilities were racing through Changbin's head at ungodly miles an hour but his heart remained content despite beating at an intense rate. Chan, in his own little way Changbin hadn’t quite figured out, proceeded to make Changbin feel like he was walking on water. When they were together, Chan somehow prompted a feeling of importance in Changbin’s chest and it made him nervous. On the contrary, there was no way Changbin could deny that Chan made him feel safe all the same. “Where are we going, Hyung?” Changbin giggled out suddenly when Chan stopped and looked around for a moment, an expression of concentration clear on his features. Chan turned back towards him, tongue swiping across his lips in a manner that made Changbin’s stomach jolt.

 

“The fields. I told you that,” Crimson swept across Changbin’s face and the elder flickered his eyes down to the ground shyly. Of course. “Shouldn’t be too much longer, just give me a moment,” It was clear Chan wasn’t exactly sure where he was going, and the excitable and anxious glint in his eyes made Changbin’s heart stumble. It wasn’t often that the childlike essence that was still buried somewhere in Chan’s bones actually showed itself and it was absolutely endearing. Chan wasn’t sure where he was currently, and while it had been scary, it gave him the same excitement he used to feel all those years ago. He missed it. Suddenly, enough to startle Changbin to a certain degree, Chan clicked his tongue and cheered in reassurance, “Come on!” And then proceeded to drag Changbin off to their left like a small child who just saw a candy store.

 

Their laughs and the snapping of twigs under their feet echoed off of the trees and into the large fields ahead of them, but the loud gasp Changbin let out once he saw the miles and miles of grass ahead of him that lead into the horizon and a small line of trees beneath fell onto deaf ears. Changbin’s eyes snapped over to Chan’s, too embarrassed to voice his question and praying that his eyes said everything he needed them to. Chan simply nodded his head with a fond smile before the younger let out a loud cheer and ran straight into the tall grass that came up to his upper calves. All the boy could do was laugh and let the stress stretching over his muscles evaporate into the wind flying past his head and through his hair. This was bliss. This was complete and utter bliss and nothing could take it away from him. Even if Changbin was left with no one, no one to hold or to hold him, than Changbin would have this field where he could run and run and run until his legs ache and lungs desperately burned and gasped for breath.

 

As cliche as it might sound, Changbin felt free in that field.

 

When Changbin came to a halt in the middle of the field, everything burned and ached painfully. So, with a sigh, Changbin fell to his knees and let himself rest for a breath or two. “Feel better?” Chan’s voice wasn’t startling as Changbin had heard the grass crackle behind him either every step, but instead slipped between the cracks of the sound around him while making his voice more prominent. Changbin fluttered his eyes open, looking back at Chan with a soft smile and nodding his head. “I’m glad,” It didn’t have to be said for Chan to know what Changbin was asking of him when the younger turned towards him with innocent, droopy eyes that oozed with nothing but pure content, and he situated himself down onto the grass beside Changbin. The younger, now sat on his heels and letting his legs relax, flipped backward so his head hit the grass and he was looking up at the sky, a tiny giggle ringing out through the field.

 

“This is nice, hyung,” Changbin admitted with shy contentment and Chan could only do nothing but look down on him and grin. Changbin was precious.

 

“It is, isn’t it? Would you like to see the dancing ladies up close?” If Chan thought the way Changbin’s eyes lit up previously was cute, they had nothing on the literal balls of light between his eyelids now. Changbin couldn’t even form proper words, jumping up like a child and eagerly nodding his head in hopes of getting his point across well enough. The soft chuckle Chan let escape past his lips sent chills down Changbin’s arms, like the man’s fingertips were ghosting over his skin and Changbin’s cheeks flushed at the thought. Long, thin fingers grazed the inside of Changbin’s palm as a warning, slowly pulling Changbin out of his head and back into the real world where his happiness was close and Chan was closer. Their hands slid together perfectly and then Chan was leading the other toward the right of the field and back into the trees.

 

They walked for a few more minutes until Changbin could see the familiar fog and he gasped, his hand sliding out of Chan’s as he escaped between the trees and entered the thin mist surrounding the small very curve in the trees. Changbin wasn’t sure if he could even call it a river, as it was nothing more than just a larger, deeper creek but it hadn’t really mattered at the time. “Changbin wait just a moment!” Chan called out in slight fear, but it fell onto deaf ears as Changbin went barreling towards the creek with bright eyes and wild curiosity. Before him, the dancing ladies were now having a party, men having joined and picking up multiple dance parties as they danced along with the current. The women’s extravagant dresses that were as wide as they were long dragged across the tip of the water gracefully and causing elegant ripples. It was a gorgeous sight, and if Changbin strained his ears enough he could hear the faint sound of classical music.

 

All the younger could do was gawk at the sight, catching the eye of a younger girl on the opposite side looking for a dance partner with a pout. Her hair was long and curly, draped over her thin, silver transparent shoulders and hovering over the edge of her breasts. When they held eye contact for more than a few seconds, she grinned from ear to ear, and the closer she approached, the easier it was to hear the soft piano playing somewhere farther along the creek. Changbin had been standing on the very edge, the thick mist oozing off the surface of the water licking at his skin when the girl was now stood in front of him and offered him a beautiful, gummy like smile. “Would you like to dance?” The spirit inquired bolding, twirling a silver strand of transparent hair around her thin colorless finger, and what was Changbin supposed to say? He wanted to dance but he highly doubted he could walk on water, much less dance.

 

Luckily for him, Chan answered for him.

 

Suddenly, the elder’s hand came up behind him and landed on Changbin’s stomach, smoothing over the fabric and pulling him backward so Changbin’s back hit Chan’s chest. “That’s enough. He doesn’t wish to,” Chan uttered coldly, and for a moment, a flash of horror washed over Changbin’s features when he saw her expression fall, face morph into something wrinkly, old, and borderline monster like before she let out a shrill hiss that made Changbin flinch back with ringing ears. Her black eyes and snake-like tongue faded back into normal before she disappeared into thin air and Changbin deflated in guilt. Was she gone now? “They’re becoming antsy,” Chan uttered, amusement clear to somehow deceive Changbin from the worry that was there and very much noticeable.

 

“Did we make her leave, hyung?” Changbin questioned sadly, melting back into Chan’s torso when the elder patted his stomach lightly.   


“No, no. Look down there,” Chan pointed farther down the creek where the girl was now dancing with a taller girl with lovesick smiles adorning their features. Changbin let out a small huff of relief before focusing his attention back on the view before him and smiling to himself. “Don’t touch them, okay? When you agree to dance and take their hands, they claim you as one of their own and you become a dancing spirit as well,” Chan warned, looking down at Changbin when the younger swiveled his head to look back at him, “They drag you in with their grace and beauty, but all they want is a new lifelong partner who can’t ever leave them,” Changbin almost felt guilty when Chan looked down the creek with a sad smile, studying all of them, “I knew all of them you know? I can tell you all of their names and what they were like before the water took them,” and Changbin didn’t doubt that.

 

They stood there for a moment, just studying everyone around them and Chan could sense how Changbin’s body began to twitch and move along with the music playing faintly in their ears.

 

“Would you like to dance?” Chan hushed in Changbin’s ear, grinning fondly when Changbin shifted in his arms and gazed up at him in disbelief.

 

“Of course,”

 

They put some space between them, Chan slithering a hand onto Changbin’s hip while the younger put his left on the other’s shoulder. Their free hands clasped together and then they were moving to the beat of the music and the rest of the dancing ladies and gentlemen on the creek. The more they moved, the more comfortable they became with one another, making more drastic and bolder movements involving the other. Changbin let out a horrified yelp when Chan twirled and decided to dip Changbin last second, holding him there for much longer than he probably should have. It seemed like it was straight out of a cliche movie and if Changbin didn’t know any better, he would have expected Chan to dip down with him and kiss Changbin but they weren’t in a movie and they weren’t on that level yet. Besides… all of this… all of this wouldn’t click just right with Jisung not there. The implication of something more was there but that’s all it was. A slight hint.

 

Laughs rung out through the trees as their chests pressed together and Changbin accidentally stumbled over his own feet. “You almost made me fall!” Changbin exclaimed in an accusing but still amused tone and Chan feigned innocence.

 

“Don’t blame your clumsiness on me!” Chan exclaimed back with just as much amusement and Changbin found himself tackling Chan to the ground in protest. “N-No! Get off!” Chan screeched loudly somewhere between his strained laughter after Changbin began running his fingers up and down his sides. The younger didn’t give the man any mercy though as the giddiness in Changbin’s heart was far too high for him but when he saw Chan about to push him off, Changbin jumped up and started running back toward the fields. “Get back here!” Chan called out after him, scrambling up sloppily before bolting through the trees. Changbin had been so close, and when Changbin’s shirt had just been within reach, the younger’s legs kicked a little faster and Chan let out a grunt of frustration. “You little brat!” Chan cried out, slowing down considerably when the burn in his lungs began to kick in from how hard he wanted to laugh. It wasn’t even a funny situation, Chan just felt… _giddy_.

 

It must have been noticeable that Chan slowed down cause Changbin stopped in his tracks, turning towards Chan with hair about as wild as the look in his eyes, “Come on, hyung. Come get me,” Changbin taunted, grinning from ear to ear when Chan readied his body to run toward him, readying his own body but they both froze when they heard the low thunder of a helicopter above. They slowly tilted their heads up toward the sky, three helicopters coming out from above the trees and looking down upon them in a menacing manner. “Hyung…” Changbin trailed off in fear, eyes locked on the elder as he calculated things in his head. Could the men see them?

 

“Don’t move, Changbin,” Chan whispered, body tense and rigid in a way that Changbin thought Chan had been stuck in place and wasn’t even allowed to move. They waited a singular moment, Chan obviously waiting for something, and when they saw something fall from the sky, Chan’s skin lost all color and fell into a dull gray. “Fuck!” Was the last thing Changbin heard before Chan disappeared into tiny, tiny particles and they all flew towards him at once before they formed into a human body again and Changbin was hoisted up in the air and into Chan’s arms. Chan’s legs kicked before they could even think about it, escaping into the trees and Changbin whimpered when a branch slapped against his cheek at the darting speeds Chan had taken to get through and if there hadn’t been soldiers in black following them with each bigger guns in hand, Chan probably would have stopped, made sure Changbin was okay, and then apologize profusely.

 

But they couldn’t just stop. The soldiers were gaining upon them, and Changbin yelped and jolted when there was a loud gunshot echoing off of the trees. “Don’t let go, you hear me? Don’t stop touching me,” Chan gruffed out, and Changbin clung onto the back of Chan’s collar to prove that he understood and would attempt and follow through. It had taken three more gunshots before Chan and Changbin evaporated into nothing and they could watch where they had been previously, a bullet passing through, and Changbin was near tears at that point. Everything went by them in harsh whispers and rough swoops of wind and it felt like Changbin could hear everything going on around him. The world was now gray, the only sense of color being the blue and green orbs flying all around them occasionally bumping together. Changbin could have watched it for hours and hours on end if he really wanted to, but the time for that wasn’t then.

 

“C-Chan,” Changbin whimpered out cautiously, barely above a whisper but Chan’s eyes widened and he furiously shook his head as the soldiers began to walk in their direction. Changbin slapped a transparent hand that didn’t even seem real over his mouth when Chan placed a finger up to his gray lips as a sign for him to be quiet.

 

“Where the fuck did they go?” A soldier questioned gruffly to the other in slight fear, and Changbin noticed Chan smirking to himself which only prompted a fear of Changbin’s own. _What was Chan planning?_ The other soldier just shrugged and the previous soldier huffed loudly. “Split up,” The soldier order roughly and the two split off into two different directions. When the two soldiers had their backs turned to Chan and Changbin, Chan started darting towards the trees, stopping abruptly when he saw multiple guards surrounding the large glass dome-like structure around the courthouse but looking at it as if there was nothing there at all. “They got away! Keep an eye out!” The soldier from before yelled suddenly from behind them and Chan had to place a transparent hand over Changbin’s mouth to keep him quiet.

 

The soldiers surrounding the dome whirled around in fright, guns up and ready to fire blindly into the trees. They all separated from the dome and moved around in an untrained and a rather unstrategic manner as Chan slowly drifted towards the dome until he managed to slip through and material without any trouble and then everything around them became real and Changbin could finally wiggle his toes.  “What the fuck…” Changbin whispered out into the air of the dome quietly in fear of dragging the attention of the soldiers to them. Chan didn’t say a word at first, just staring down at Changbin to make sure he was okay and not too shaken up. Changbin practically melted into the man’s light touch to his cheek, knuckles brushing across the plush skin.

 

“Stay here, okay? Go into the house and don’t come out until I come get you,” Chan ordered, shoving Changbin in the direction of the courthouse and turning around to slip back through the field. Except he didn’t physically pass through but instead evaporated into tiny, tiny particles that despite them being bunched up, couldn’t be seen. Is that… Is that what happened to him earlier? It was hard to really take in at the time, that Chan could just disappear into this other realm while simultaneously able to exist in this one but Changbin couldn’t say he was exactly surprised either. Changbin had only seen glimpses of the elder’s bold, thick tattoos and that meant Chan almost had overwhelming power. Changbin wondered if maybe there was more to Chan than just a regular guy that was like them.

 

It all happened so quickly, Changbin slapping a hand over his mouth when Chan suddenly appeared behind one of the guards as quiet as a god damn mouth and slipped his hands onto the guard’s chest from behind. Horror filled the very depths of Changbin’s stomach when a bright light illuminated the poor man’s mouth and eyes as if the soul inside was forcefully burning out of him. The guard fell to the ground and Chan disappeared into thin air once again and all Changbin could do was watch the elder flicker from guard to guard along the forest floor, mouth agape but covered by his scarred palm. The guards were trying their best to figure out where he was, blindly shooting into the abyss of the forest but ultimately getting their life taken from them as they never seemed to watch their backs, let alone each other. It was a sad sight to witness.

 

However, there was a guard. There was a guard lingering by the border and staring into it as if he could see through it and stared right at Changbin. Something about him drew Changbin forward, the grass crunching beneath his feet as he approached the guard kneeling down against the ground. He was bleeding, a gunshot wound from all the misfire, but there was this knowing gleam to his eyes, following Changbin’s figure when the boy kneeled down to the ground so they were at the same height. Perhaps the most eery part of all of this, which hadn’t been the fact that the man could even see him, but was the blizzard rolling around in the depths of his eyes. He was one of them fighting on the other side, and the regret in that decision was seemingly apparent. It was obvious that the man was just trying to save himself but at that moment...

 

Changbin realized that they all die anyway. There is no saving people like him.

 

“I’m sorry,” And then Chan appeared behind him, tattooed fingers clutching at the guard’s chest and where there was once a blizzard there was bright burning light before it died into red and pink nothingness.

 

Changbin scrambled back, falling on his butt as Chan stared down at him, a solemn regret but not for taking all those lives. No, it was a regret for letting Changbin see it. The silence around them made Changbin’s lungs swell up and pins and needles run up his arms and Chan’s regretful eyes became sad, disappearing into thin air and leaving Changbin choking on it. “C-Chan…” Changbin stuttered out, tongue dry and too big for his mouth and he wished the man would just appear again. He didn’t mean to be so scared. Chan was just protecting them, and Changbin understood that. “Chan, please come back,” but the elder didn’t answer him.

 

Changbin fell back onto the grass with a sigh, thoughts swarming all around him but never latching onto the front of his brain. They were all fighting for a large place, a majority that Changbin was forced to focus on but it was foggy, too hard for them to place themselves correctly. Soon, the tears from the overwhelming situation began to swell up in his eyes and Changbin was left roughly wiping them away in an almost desperate manner. Changbin hated being alone. He hated it with the same fiery passion already burning in his heart but he couldn’t help but feel like maybe that was the best option for him at that moment.

 

He still needed Jisung though. He needed to hear him laugh, needed to see him smile, needed to feel his touch. However, Changbin wouldn’t admit it to himself at the time, but he needed Chan too.

 

Chan was quickly becoming something alongside Jisung, but they’d ignore it for now. That’s all they could do.

  


Hours seemed to pass before Changbin was joined by another figure again. None of Changbin’s muscles moved during that time, nor did they move when Chan’s familiar body appeared next to his on the grass. No words were spoken at first; the two just… stared up at the sky for a while until Changbin could feel Chan staring at him, flickering his gaze with an almost desperate manner reminding Changbin of a child who was too scared to ask their parents something. It broke his heart a little bit. “What?” Changbin finally broke the silence, Chan jolting a bit at the sudden gruffness and fidgeting when he sat up.

 

“Do you hate me?” Chan managed to stumble out, the tense air becoming tenser. Changbin didn’t reply for a moment, registering what Chan was asking and frowning a bit. At first, he couldn’t answer verbally. Here, between the three of them, actions spoke louder than words but words made everything more official. So, the younger sat up, scooting closer to the elder until their biceps were touching and Changbin could comfortably rest his head in the juncture of Chan’s neck and shoulder. Chan tensed up for the slightest moment but ultimately relaxed. Boldly offering the younger his open, tattooed palm. Changbin didn’t hesitate to trace his fingers along the symbols there.

 

“I don’t hate you,”

 

“Are you scared of me?”

 

“...I’m not scared of you. I’m scared of what you can do,” Changbin admitted honestly, beginning to trace the veins moving from Chan’s fingers to his wrist. His fingers curiously inched beneath the band of Chan’s jacket, silently implying that he wanted to see the markings but Chan pulled back a bit. _Not today_. “I still want to be around you… If that makes you feel any better,” Changbin spoke up suddenly, a teasing lilt to his tone and Chan laughed quietly in his ear.

 

“That’s good. I’m glad,” Chan murmured, stumbling over his words nervously as he had still been a bit caught off guard by the younger’s words. An awkward, silence-breaking cough spilled from Chan’s lips and out into the air and served what he needed it to do as Changbin sunk into Chan’s side, fingers still tracing over the markings along Chan’s wrist, not daring to nudge any farther up his arm again. “Jisung should be home soon. I managed to get ahold of him and let him know that there are men after us and to come in from under the bridge,” Chan explained, Changbin snapping his head up in curiosity. The bridge? “Oh right… You’d think I would have learned by now that you don’t know everything yet, wouldn’t you?” Chan inquired, rubbing at the back of his neck in embarrassment but Changbin just took his wrist and slid their fingers together.

 

“Show me,” Changbin uttered with so much damn intensity that there wasn’t anyway Chan could just say no so the elder lifted himself up onto his feet so he could help Changbin stand up. Their hands never broke apart as Chan lead him over to a shed, propping the doors open and leading the younger inside. Changbin looked around in confusion, nothing out of the ordinary aside from the excessive amount of stuff, “What is all of this?” Changbin inquired, daring to dart towards a box and dig through the top but only finding old documents and weird tools that he didn’t even know existed.

 

“Old stuff from the courthouse that wasn’t useful to me,” Chan grunted out as he lifted three boxes stacked on top of one another and shoving it off to the side. “Help me move all of this to the side. I need the middle to be opened,” Chan ordered, pointing towards all the furniture and boxes in the middle and with panicked movements, Changbin began to move things without much thought ultimately making Chan’s life harder in the long run. Changbin nearly jumped out of his skin when Chan slipped his hand onto the younger’s shoulder. “Breathe,” Changbin’s chest puffed out before he let out a long, shaky breath that was long awaited, “Now take these boxes and put them outside where they’re out of the way,”

 

“Sorry…” Changbin apologized sheepily, eyes flickering down and cheeks flushing after Chan’s hand slipped to the back of his neck and pulled his head back so he was looking at Chan.

 

“Don’t apologize. Just calm down,” Chan wasn’t sure why Changbin was so on edge, but Jisung was the same way at times so he knows better than to ask. Changbin nodded and slipped out of his grip, missing the warmth but sucking it up. Changbin couldn’t believe he just made an absolute full of himself in front of Chan for no good reason, angrily muttering to himself as he moved the boxes and Chan tried his best not to laugh at him either. “Alright. That’s good enough,” Chan called out to him from the back of the shed, pulling a small sphere from his pockets and that’s when Changbin noticed the thin pedestal with strange markings on it and didn’t reach any higher than Chan’s lower hip. Changbin didn’t get to open his mouth and ask questions before Chan placed the sphere on top and white, illuminating light boiled inside the sphere until to consumed it completely with clouds and struck lighting trails of white down the pedestal and into the floor.

 

A gasp bounced off the walls when the floor underneath them cracked and fell into nothing, staying within a respective square and revealing a ramp down into the dark depths of the underground. “What the fuck…” Changbin breathed, stumbling back when the sphere lifted up with a curl of Chan’s first and middle finger. Chan laughed breathily, just barely audible but the amusement was clearly there. “Am I allowed to ask questions?”

 

“Later. We need to get to Jisung,” Chan uttered casually, the sphere hovering above him a few meters away and leading them both down the now illuminated corridor. As the sphere passed the grey, sleek perfectly cut bricks lining the walls, the same light coming from the orb that had cracked along the floor originally created small symbols he didn’t recognize within the bricks and along the seams where they were all connected and stayed lit up. Changbin couldn’t take his eyes off of it, running up ahead of the sphere and watching the symbols along the walls appear as Chan walked closer. It was a rather endearing sight, reminding Chan of all those years ago when he saw the lights too. “Come on,” Chan rasped, curling an arm around his shoulder and dragging Changbin along when he began to trace the symbols with his finger in ripe fascination.

 

Changbin fell away from the wall and into Chan’s side with a pout but kept moving along the long, long tunnel with huffs but he gasped in shock when they began to fade into a still bright by earthy green. “This is gorgeous,” Changbin hushed, reaching out to touch it again and Chan didn’t try to stop him, simply nudging Changbin along so they were still making progress. Up ahead, they could see two bright lights ahead, and if Chan hadn’t been holding him at the shoulder, Changbin would have bolted toward the lights in pure excitement and relief. “Jisung?” Changbin dared to call out, just barely over a normal speaking voice but it was loud enough to echo off the walls and reach the younger boy’s ear.

 

“Yeah, love,” and Changbin’s legs kicked before he could even think. The lights became brighter before they became useful, seeing Jisung leaning against the foot of his car and giggling to himself as he threw himself against Jisung’s chest and curled his arms tightly around the younger’s neck. “Ok, ok,” Jisung laughed warmly in Changbin’s ear, and the elder felt like melting into a giant puddle of warmth. “Did you miss me?” Jisung inquired cheekily when Changbin pulled away to rub his hands down the sides of Jisung’s face and his thumbs across Jisung’s lips. However, it earned him a soft slap to both cheeks at the same time and Jisung groaned in dismay.

 

“Of course I missed you, brat,” Changbin hissed but there wasn’t any sort of malice or poison to his tone. Jisung grinned into the side of Changbin’s head, feathering a light kiss to his hair that Changbin couldn’t even feel but knew he had done anyway. However, the two had to pull away when they heard a cough behind them and Chan was standing there with his arms folded behind his back and a fond gleam in his rather sleepy eyes. “Right. We should head back,” Changbin flushed, but Jisung didn’t say anything more, breaking away from Changbin and approaching Chan with slightly open arms. Chan slipped a hand over the back of Jisung’s head, bringing it into his neck and placing the other on the middle of Jisung’s back, practically caging him in a safe cage as he buried the lower part of his face in Jisung’s shoulder. Changbin cooed internally and flushed when Chan glanced at him over Jisung’s shoulder, obviously smirking a bit from how his eyebrows were raised and eyes half-lidded.

 

“Did it go well?” Chan whispered into Jisung’s ear, not daring to pull back and possibly have Changbin hear anything. Jisung tapped twice on his back for yes and Chan relaxed his shoulders. “Alright, let's grab whatever is in the back and head back so I can start supper,” Chan sighed, pulling away from Jisung and prompting the younger to curl in on himself from the lack of heat and touch. Changbin must have noticed though and taken his hand into his slightly larger one and intertwined their fingers in hopes of being a substitute. Jisung could say that Changbin was better than just a substitute. He was the real thing.

 

However, the moment of peace shattered into nothing when a loud boom rang off of the walls and everything around them vibrated and cracked. Changbin’s breath caught in his throat, eyes darting over to Chan’s in fear of what was to come. Though nothing did. There was nothing in the darkness of the large corridor accept them but the only way Changbin knew this was because Chan’s grip on their shoulders wasn’t tight as if he were protecting them. It was rather amazing what you can learn from a person just from being with them for a few months. “Hyung…” Jisung trailed off in fear, but Chan just shook his head with a calm, but firm manner.

 

“It’s okay. It was above. I’ll put a few more shields around the tunnel so they don’t find it,” Chan hushed before coaxing them toward the back of the car to grab the boxes inside and back along the tunnel to the main entrance that leads into their tiny little, safe bubble. Changbin may have hated it at times but he couldn’t deny the fact that he still felt safe within its walls. “I’ll get started on supper. Changbin, go help Jisung settle back in after placing those boxes in my office,” Chan placed his box right on top of Changbin’s knowing he could handle it before escaping into the kitchen and giving the two to escape into their alone time as well.

 

Though it was unbearably quiet as they walked down the hallways to reach Chan’s office that Changbin had only been in once or twice when he couldn’t sleep and was searching for some company. “Did everything go well?” Changbin questioned quietly in hopes of getting the boy talking but Jisung only hummed in confirmation. “Were there any problems?”

 

“Nope,” Jisung popped the ‘p’ with a prideful gleam in his eyes but his lips made no quirk up to signal that he truly was proud. Changbin frowned at the younger’s shortness but didn’t push anymore, huffing quietly enough that if Jisung even heard it, it wasn’t likely to be suspicious. Jisung, being the one carrying less, opened the door with ease and let Changbin through before him. However, Changbin wasn’t even sure where to set them so waited around for Jisung to set them down in the corner and reach out to take the first box from Changbin so the elder could safely put down the last on top. Jisung could see that Changbin desperately wanted to ask what was in the boxes so cut him off before he could in the best way possible. “You’re beautiful, hyung,” Jisung rasped before connecting their lips sweetly and Changbin practically melted into the light touches prodding into his hip bones.

 

“Not as beautiful as you,” It barely even came out, hardly understandable but Jisung was so used to the elder’s mumbles that he could decipher them with ease, chuckling lowly into Changbin’s mouth when they pulled away briefly. They didn’t say anything more after that, Changbin nuzzling their noses together before tilting his head and nosing along Jisung’s cheek and jaw until he reached his neck to feather kisses against the tan skin there. Jisung hummed in content, backing them into the wall so his head could rest against something while giving Changbin better access. Changbin wasn’t complaining by any means, sending vibrations down Jisung’s nerves when Jisung curled his fingers into his hair and tugged lightly on instinct as Changbin began to apply more pressure to his neck. “I missed you,” Changbin gruffed out, hooking his hands over Jisung’s hips and holding him firmly enough to keep him in place but not tight enough in case the younger wanted to be let go.

 

“I missed you too,” Jisung breathed, pulling Changbin’s head up to press their lips together a little more sloppily by his hair and shoved their chests closer together so they could feel the other’s heartbeat, but they were so in tune with one another that they simply beat as one. Changbin let out a soft gasp when Jisung snaked his tongue inside his mouth but didn’t pull back until Jisung did. “So much, hyung,” Jisung panted out, pulling away for much-needed breath and placing a line that Changbin was not to cross by any means until Jisung gave him the go. “It was so hard to sleep without you at least there in the room,” Jisung admitted quietly, swiping his tongue across his very swollen lips and Changbin watched it in humorous fascination.

 

“You weren’t alone in that, baby,” Changbin chuckled, bumping their foreheads together before pressing a firm, caring kiss to the younger’s as if he were soothing away the nonexistent pain he caused. However, that was when Chan came barreling through the door with no warning, eyes slowly catching Changbin and Jisung’s predicament and the hands of Changbin massaging into Jisung’s tummy under the younger’s shirt. Chan groaned loudly once he realized, and shook his head with a menacing scowl.

 

“In my office? Really?”

 

“You were supposed to be making supper,” Jisung shrugged nonchalantly before burying his head into Changbin’s shoulder who was undeniably shy and flustered from being caught.

 

“ _I am_ ,” Chan snarled with no bite before taking the two by their shoulders and shoving him out of his office, “Take it into your bedroom, not my office,” Chan grunted, waving a finger in their faces before slamming the door in them leaving the two chuckling to themselves in shock. Though Jisung didn’t want to stand there any longer, really wishing for nothing but a long ass nap but knew the closest he would get until he ate was some lie-down time with Changbin. It seemed the elder knew this too as he darted right toward the bed and belly flopped on top, basking in Jisung’s quiet giggles as the younger began to change into more comfortable clothes. With this in mind, Changbin curled up under the blankets and waited patiently for the younger to get comfortable, pulling the clean smelling sheets he changed that morning up to his face and burying his nose within the cloth.

 

“Did Chan hyung get cuter in the short time I was gone?” Jisung questioned randomly, pulling the upper half of his hair up into a bun so it was out of his face and Changbin cooed internally at the slight pout to his puffy lips.

 

“I think he got hotter actually,” Changbin teased, opening up the blankets and sheets so Jisung could slip underneath him and the younger offered the elder nothing but a huff in return. “I saw the extent of his power today and honestly… I was beyond baffled of what he could do. That man can evaporate into nothing, Jisung,” Changbin gasped in shock, whispering it out as if they were kids at a sleepover sharing secrets. Jisung’s eyebrows furrowed in both confusion and concern.

 

“He _approached_ those guys?” Jisung questioned, sitting up and looking far from happy.

 

“He _killed_ them,” It was quiet for a second, Jisung’s eyes flickering down to his lap to twiddle his thumbs and stare them down in almost disbelief of what his most trustworthy hyung did today. Chan had always done what he needed to do to assure their safety, but he never resorted to _murder_.

 

“How many of them were there?”

 

“Too many for me to be comfortable with… There were so many, Jisung. I was scared they’d actually see past the bubble and call more men to come and back them up so they could somehow get it down,” Changbin explained, sitting up as well and taking Jisung’s hands into his own and rubbing gently into the symbols of Jisung’s palms as if he were layering protection after protection on top of him, “There was this one guy…” Changbin trailed off,  scared to even continue saying what he wanted to but Jisung squeezed his hand in comfort. “He was like us, Jisung. I couldn’t see his palms but there was a blizzard in his eyes. A literal blizzard!” Changbin exclaimed, but keeping his voice quiet as to not gather Chan’s concern. “And he was killed right in front of me… I saw one of my own killed right in front of me,” Changbin was no longer staring at Jisung but instead the wall behind his head and gnawing on his lips in concern.

 

Jisung knew what he was going through currently. When all of this first started and they started rounding up all those like them in the smaller towns that Jisung was popping in and out of to gather resources for him and Chan, he had seen his fair share get pinned to the ground and a bullet put in their head. He hadn’t seen much of it recently as laws were starting to be put in place and police had to keep their hands off of them in the meantime, but it was never a sight he got used to. More times than not when Jisung had nightmares, they were flashbacks to all those times he saw it and thought he could have done something to prevent it. Sometimes their faces were placed with Changbin’s and Chan’s, but it seemed every time they were, Chan interfered and switched up Jisung’s dreams before he died of a heart attack in his sleep.

 

Jisung understood, but he had no idea how to handle this situation.

 

“I’m sorry, love. I know it’s hard,” Jisung rasped, curling a hand over Changbin’s cheek and rubbing his thumb along the bags under Changbin’s eyes, “I would lie and say it gets easier but… it doesn’t. It really doesn’t,” Jisung’s voice cracked at the end, eyes squeezing shut to prevent tears and clear away the blurriness but Changbin knew better and pulled Jisung into his chest and down to the bed so they could at least be there for one another if they both couldn’t be strong in this situation. It didn’t matter who you were, killing or seeing someone be killed takes a toll on you. Changbin could only imagine what it must be like for Chan. At the thought of the elder, and what he did today, Changbin found it harder to breathe, clutching onto Jisung’s shirt collar tightly. “Why are you crying? Talk to me, please,” Jisung panicked, stroking his fingers through Changbin’s hair in hopes of soothing him.

 

Changbin didn’t say anything, too worked up to form words and Jisung just pulled Changbin’s head into his neck to provide some warmth despite the poor elder’s heart practically burning with flames. Changbin’s skin was searing hot to the touch, and if it hadn’t been for Yuna coming up with an icy cold body to press against his back and cool him down, occasionally nosing at Jisung’s hands lightly to receive a few pats as well. “You’re going to overheat soon, love. You need to breathe,” Jisung worried in Changbin’s ear and it seemed to work for the most part but there needed to be that final little push that someone else had to give him, but Chan only knocked on the door and called out that supper was ready from the hallway before very loudly shuffling away. It wasn’t Chan’s fault, he didn’t know, but Changbin deflated at the absence of the elder and his lack of attention.

 

They didn’t say anything more after that, Changbin tugging at Jisung’s shirt with a sniffle before rolling out of bed. Jisung studied him wearily, watching the elder escape into the attached bathroom to wash his face and hopefully mask that he had been crying. However, his eyes were swollen and his hot skin was gaining a pink tinge to it as if he were sunburned. “It’s okay, baby,” Changbin croaked when he met Jisung’s eyes through the mirror, swiping a cold, wet washcloth over his eyes, over his face, down his neck, across his shoulders, and down his arms in hopes of getting his body temperature to drop. Despite being leaned against the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest and looking anything but adorable with his slightly swollen eyes and messy hair, Jisung’s pout had Changbin cooing, swiveling around to slither his buffer arms around the younger’s torso.

 

“I can cry my heart out later. For now, I want you to eat so you can get some sleep,” Changbin rasped, voice still wet and thick with his tears he had just managed to push away and Jisung didn’t argue anymore after that. Changbin may have been vulnerable, but he recognized the finality in his tone. Changbin meant what he said and all Jisung could do was offer him a soft kiss and a giggle when Changbin slipped his hand down and patted his bum. “Go. I’ll join you in a second,” Changbin shoved him along and made sure Jisung had rounded the corner of the hall until he quietly closed the door and escaped back into the bathroom.

 

Changbin could barely keep himself upright at this point, nearly falling into the sink counter as he gripped the edges with a tight grip. So tight that Changbin’s hands were trembling from the pressure. The feeling swirling inside of the pit of his stomach, a flame dancing along the lines if you will because he wasn’t sad, but he wasn’t angry either. There was just this overwhelming need to do _something_. It was that need for change that Chan spoke so heavily about on a regular basis, and sure Changbin had felt it before but never to the extreme he was feeling it now. Changbin slowly dragged his head up, glancing at his reflection and catching the sight of his own eyes in the mirror underneath his sweaty, black bangs.

 

There was a fire there, the same variation of the blizzard he saw in that man’s eyes today, and Changbin took a shaky breath into the same tempo of the fires flickering around. His skin was becoming hotter and hotter the more he thought about everything, the mere images of what had happened today triggering such feeling in his heart that caused goosebumps to rise along his thighs and back alone. But thinking about the little stories he had read from the newspapers Jisung snuck into their little bubble for him and the videos he occasionally caught Chan watching on his hand-built computer in his office, he realized just how fucked the whole world is and now he’s so undeniably determined to turn _something_ around.

 

Changbin couldn’t do much from his small bubble but the fire licking at his toes and curling up his ankles like a snake made him feel like he could hold the whole world in the palms of his hands. The snakes were harmless in their own right, merely slithering up and dragging the fire up along with them as they purred and hissed along his skin as if they were simply stroking the fire out of him. It was when they began to break off into tiny baby snakes to cover more ground, Changbin staring down at his hand to see them slither and curl around his fingers, nosing at his burning knuckles and Changbin felt himself gasp when he saw the fire coating his arms but it hadn’t been out of shock. Changbin’s heart was burning with a thick need, one much stronger than the one he experienced before but he felt like he could control it now.

 

“Changbin? Changbin!” The voice was muffled, but very familiar and Changbin didn’t know why he was shocked that Chan had finally shown up. He knew the man could feel when Changbin was getting simply worked up a bit, so imagine how obvious it is for Changbin to be absolutely _on fire_ . There were tiny little dragons that were once tiny little snakes flying all around his body, creating a shield of sorts around him and when Changbin swiveled around to face Chan, the silver-eyed man studied him carefully but in an almost panicked manner as well. For the first time, Changbin saw the fear of the unknown in Chan’s eyes and it was… _overpowering_. “Changbin, I need you to breathe. You’re too weak to be draining yourself like this right now!” Chan demanded but it fell onto deaf ears. Whoever Changbin had been before was replaced by the fire in his heart and soul of the dragons around him. They clutched and breathed fire onto the layers of his own soul and locked it up tighter than a drum just so it could worm its way to the front of his nerves and control him like a puppet.

 

Though Changbin liked to believe that these were truly his intentions all along and that the urges had been hidden for far too long. “I am not weak!” Changbin hissed, voice coming out warped, gravely, and so unlike his own. Though it seemed Chan recognized the voice anyhow as his skin grew pale and he took a step back.

 

“You are not supposed to be here anymore,” Chan croaked, “You are not supposed to exist. I banished you!” Chan hissed, confusion clear in his eyes and Changbin was no longer able to clutch onto the nerves in his body. Something else was in control now and if it hadn’t been for the fear of finding Chan and Jisung dead when he gained control again, Changbin wouldn’t be fighting so hard to gain it back so quickly. It was obvious Changbin’s indecisiveness was taking a toll on whatever spirit was in his body as when he began to approach Chan, he stopped abruptly and bent at the waist with a grunt. That was as far as Changbin could get through.

 

“Do not be fooled, dirty blood, your kind cannot get rid of me so easily,” Changbin cackled, slit tongue snaking out between his lips, “You haven’t changed a bit, have you? You’ve been hidden for so long… Where are the others? Did you kill them too? Did the power get to your head, dirty blood?” Chan’s eyes began to sting, fists clenching at his sides but unable to will himself forward. He would have to be smart with this. If he were to banish it again… Changbin wouldn’t come out of this alive. Changbin would have to be the one to get out of this. Changbin’s strength was needed more than ever at this moment.

  
But now everything made sense. Changbin never sizzling and sparking his way up to his flames but instead it coming out in a forceful, uncontrolled burst. The flames had always been Changbin’s, but the control over them was not. “They are very much alive, Chanyeol. The power never got to my head because I didn’t have it, to begin with,” Chan breathed out shakily, despite the half lie. They weren’t dead, but the power nearly had Chan killed.

 

“Stop lying to me, dirty blood,” Changbin demanded, raising an arm up and scratching a fiery nail down his cheek and creating a bleeding burn mark, “It’s not good for that precious, pure soul of yours,” Changbin smirked, and then he was gone, Changbin darting out of the room and into the forest once he managed to knock some of his own control into place. Changbin had very little clue as to what was going on but all he knew was that he needed to leave and get out of there before he ended up killing them. “What are you doing? You wanted this!” The spirit in him hissed but Changbin had just enough control to choke out a few words of his own.   
  
“No! Don’t hurt them! Please!” Changbin stopped in the middle of a forest, breathing heavily but losing control over his body again. The spirit was now deciding what Changbin had control over and _when_. “Please…” Changbin whimpered, despite knowing full well that this spirit would not give in so easily.

 

“Ah. I see. You’ve fallen for both the bearer of time and the dirty blood,” Changbin could feel his eyes began to sting when the spirit gave him control for a split second. _No_. Changbin wasn’t ready to admit it to himself. Not yet. “It doesn’t matter if you’re ready or not, weakling. There will be times you’ll face that are so unfair it feels like you shouldn’t even have to compete in the first place because you know you’ll lose,” The spirit spat.

 

“What do you want from me?”

 

“This isn’t about you. It never was. We’re a perfect fit though, you and me,” The spirit’s cackle rung out from the trees. “You don’t deserve what you have, weakling. If it weren’t for me, you would have died a long, long time ago,”

 

“That’s not true,”

 

“Oh but it is, weakling. If you hadn’t died from setting yourself aflame, you would have died the moment you realized you fell for two souls because your heart would have shattered into a million tiny pieces. You are incapable of real strength, weakling. You can’t hold yourself together,”

 

“Changbin, don’t listen to him,” Jisung called out from behind him, gasping when the hurricane of flames began to swirl and become brighter around him. “Changbin, we love you. You’re strong!” Jisung boomed over the whirring wind and Chan began to fear for the trees all around them. The last thing he needed was a forest fire that could not only draw attention to them but destroy the life that kept him on his feet all the same.

 

“They’re lying to you, Changbin,” The spirit graveled in his head, no longer holding the control he once had over Changbin’s body. “They fear for their lives and they are willing to do anything to make sure they don’t die. Even if it means making you believe they may possibly love you back,” The spirit spat. “I can make you strong, Changbin. One day I will rule the universe and you can stand by my side as my trusted son,” It was as if the spirit himself was standing in front of him, holding out a clawed hand to him through the fire but Changbin could do nothing but stare at it. Just a few moments ago, this creature was treating him as if he were nothing and no one can make up their mind that quickly, not even an evil creature.

 

“You’re lying to me,” Changbin whispered, not realizing that when he was gazing at the creature in front of him, he was gazing through him and at Jisung. The younger whimpered pitifully, saying that he wasn’t but Changbin didn’t hear it. “I want you out,” Changbin hissed. Images of Chan’s slashed cheek and Jisung’s fearful eyes flashed into his mind, “I want you gone,” ones of the two smiling and laughing began to pile in as well, “You have no right to be here and using my body for your own will,” Changbin needed them. He needed to be with them, “Begone. Never come back,” Changbin whispered, but the spirit inside him cackled.

 

“I’ll leave for now, Seo Changbin, but I’ll be back, and I won’t promise an easy fight,”

 

“And I won’t be expecting one,” Changbin muttered emptily, feeling full control take over his body, the dragons and snakes bending to _his_ will. The spirit was gone, Changbin knew that much, but that hurricane did not fall for even a moment even after he gained control. The fire was a clear interpretation of his mind and as he gazed through the flames, he saw Chan and Jisung looking upon him in both horror and confusion. They knew now. There was no doubt about it. Chan knew Changbin was as infatuated with him as he was for Jisung and Changbin could feel his heart sink into his stomach. He couldn’t do this right now.

 

Changbin was always good at fleeing, so it was really no surprise when his hurricane of flames shot up and thinned out into a funnel as he soured up so far into the sky he reached the cold, cold temperatures of space above the earth before there was a flash and Changbin’s fires dimmed as he was now stood on a floating, glimmering platform made of a material he had never seen before. Changbin’s eyes locked on the Earth beneath him and tears welled up in his eyes when he saw all the bloodshed and war going on. It looked so… _lonely_. “Seo Changbin,”

 

It was a soft voice that reminded Changbin of twinkling stars and wind chimes. It was the living embodiment of comfort and grace and Changbin couldn’t help but turn to see four, tall thrones in front of him made of the same, glimmering opal-like material he was stood on. Only three of them were occupied though, the most prominent and grand one taken by a tall woman with long, shiny pale blonde hair that faded into stars and eyes that were pure white. Her skin was translucent, a little paler than the material he was stood on but still glimmered and shined. Her dress reminded Changbin of a waterfall but instead made with lace. “Who are you?” Changbin croaked, eyeing the two younger ones occupying the other thrones, all faintly resembling Chan but the girl and boy looking younger than the elder.

 

“I am Gyuri,” She murmured, offering Changbin a smile, “You are very special to my son, Seo Changbin, but not only that, you are special to the world,” Changbin gulped. _What_ ? Was this Chan’s _mother_? “Despite what Chanyeol says, you are more than what you think. You are strong, but your control is lacking,” Changbin eyes wavered, flickering down to his feet in embarrassment, “Do not be shy, my boy. Everyone was where you are now. Everyone starts from nothing and ends with everything,” The woman beamed, stepping down from her throne to take Changbin’s chin into her thin, beautiful hands. Changbin was almost mesmerized with her beauty. Did it run in the family? “I see why my son has become so infatuated with you, just as he did with the bearer of time,” She admitted. “Though I never quite understood his infatuation with the human world,”

 

“What is going on?” Changbin pulled his chin out of her hand, “What are you?”

 

“I am everything, Seo Changbin. I am the universe itself,”

 

“That… spirit demon thing said he’d rule the universe one day,” Changbin trembled, watching a dark amused look flash in the woman’s eyes.

 

“Chanyeol is a reckless fool who believes he will take my place one day. I should have gotten rid of him when I had the chance. Now my poor son is being tortured with his arrival once more,” Gyuri muttered bitterly, “but no matter. I wanted you to understand your strength, Seo Changbin, I still do. But I fear the only man you are going to learn from is my son,” Changbin’s cheeks flushed at that. “Stay true to yourself, and your mother, Seo Changbin,”

 

“My mother wanted nothing to do with me… If she saw me now, she’d kill me,”

 

“I am the mother, Changbin. You are mine now. So is Jisung and every other being like you on Earth. You have a task before you Seo Changbin, and you must use every resource you know to complete it,” Suddenly, a bracelet appeared around the human’s wrist, “Chanyeol must be banished for good,” Changbin nodded. “Go now. Stay true to me and I will stay true to you,” A firm kiss was planted to his forehead, a surge of warmth and strength surging through him.

 

“Thank you, mother,”

 

“One more thing, Changbin,” Changbin lifted his eyes up, cheeks still flushed from the affection shown to him, “Tell my son to come home,” And then Changbin was falling back to Earth, body limp and fire swirling all around him and Changbin screeched loudly when he saw himself flying back down to the yard outside the courthouse at a rapid speed. Luckily for him though, a cloud of fire appeared from beneath him and acted as a parachute so he didn’t hit the ground so roughly and possibly create a crater.

 

Changbin felt his heart drop when he snapped his eyes open and saw Chan and Jisung staring at him from the doorway of the courthouse with swollen eyes and a clinginess to each other that meant there was a conversation they would need to have sooner or later. For now, though, those were not the answers Changbin needed. “I need answers, Chan, and I need them now. _Who are you?_ ”

  
  


**END OF SECTION II**

  
  
  
  


[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1102731930200670208?s=20)]


	9. SECTION III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I'm blinded by the lights
> 
> Of October skies
> 
> These postcard memories
> 
> Evade my eyes,”

**“Good morning! Today, we have Hwang Hyunjin, a journalist studying the sudden uproar of people with supernatural abilities, to talk to us about the history of these beings. Morning, Hyunjin.”**

 

**“Good morning!”**

 

**“So… you’ve spoken to a few specialists about where all of this has come from, and I guess I’m just curious as to how long this has been going on. Surely it’s not just some sort of modern epidemic,”**

 

**“Perhaps the beauty of history is its ability to keep secrets the more time that passes. Sure, when history is looked at for over thousands of years, it’s hard for experts to miss certain events and the details that go with them, but the stories become jumbled over time and certain facts and ideas skip so many generations that it’s almost a given that they become long forgotten. It seems the last time there was even a report of people with these abilities was all the way back before the eruption of Mount Halla, and even then we’re not entirely sure if that’s the earliest any of this has been going on,”**

 

**“So, what does this mean? Did it just stop after the eruption?”**

 

**“It isn’t likely. The historians that I’ve spoken to about all of this believe strongly that there was an almost underground society for them and helped them blend in naturally,”**

 

**“Is it okay if I throw in a theory of my own?”**

 

**“Of course,”**

 

**“Maybe the eruption was deliberate? Could it be possible that the society there wanted to throw themselves back into hiding so covered everything up with the eruption?”**

 

**“Uh… a few of the historians I’ve talked to voiced this theory actually, but scientists believe there’s no true way to spring a volcanic eruption all on your own,”**

 

**“But it seems all terms of science need to be re-evaluated after all of this, no?”**

 

**“Oh of course. The way of society and what’s involved has changed dramatically over the course of a year and a half, but there’s nothing we can do to change it. We just have to learn to adapt.”**

  
  


 

 

_**Section III** _

_**“October Skies”** _

__

 

**“I'm blinded by the lights**

**Of October skies**

**These postcard memories**

**Evade my eyes,”**

 

 

**[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1135541580855726080)]**


	10. LITTLE LION MAN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Weep for yourself, my man,  
> You'll never be what is in your heart  
> Weep little lion man,  
> You're not as brave as you were at the start,"

**September 1007 A.D.**

 

 _Feeling all the elements swirling around you and simply existing amongst them is the best source of control for the power that rumbles inside you._ Those words rang in Chan’s head all throughout the day for every moment he was alive and breathing. Even as he sat on the balcony, on his knees and feet curled underneath him to provide him a stable stance as he listened to the trees whispers secrets to him and the water below twinkle little giggles into his heart, they flowed against him along with the current of the wind, and Chan cherished them endlessly. Merely existing within the world instead of forcing yourself to blend and mesh with the others does more for the soul in the long run. “Brother, there are residents of a nearby town in search of your assistance,” A familiar hand slipped onto his shoulder and Chan took in a deep breath to snap himself back into reality and melt into the touch of his trusted friend.

 

“Thank you, brother,” Chan murmured softly with that wistful tone that drug even the most stubborn of souls into relaxation. Chan got up and off of his feet and swiveled around to see his younger, most trusted brother standing there with his very cat-like grin. “Why don’t you take my place at the summit and exist for a few moments, no?” Chan suggested, brushing his knuckles along Minho’s cheekbone with a fond, almost fatherly touch and Minho hummed in denial.

 

“I can’t, brother. I have to train the prodigies in a few moments. I was simply retrieving you,” Minho explained, tugging Chan gently up by his side so they could walk together, Minho’s hand on the man’s mid back as if he were guiding an elderly man despite only a few years difference in age.

 

“Are they coming along well?” Minho hummed and nodded in confirmation, “is Seungmin doing well with his training?” Chan questioned with furrowed eyebrows and Minho shot him a look. Chan asked about individual members quite often as he was the highest man alongside Minho in the temple and liked to know who he was overseeing, but Minho took note of his constant worry for the younger Kim.

 

“He is doing quite alright. He might even overpass you soon if you don’t start training again,” Minho teased, expecting something along the lines of a joking scowl and an amused laugh but was only met with bright, knowing eyes that told Minho there was something he needed to know. “What has you giddy, brother?” Minho questioned wearily, a happy, giddy Chan being a Chan he learned to fear over time. The man tended to make rather extreme decisions when he harbored the light of Gyuri in his eyes.

 

“There is a reason he is so special, Minho. I had visions years ago of him standing alongside you and me,” Minho eyes widened in shock, staring at his brother in disbelief, “I think it’s time he met mother,” Chan hushed, and as much as the idea seemed to unsettle Minho, he had to admit that the boy made a great addition to the temple and was devoted endlessly to the control Gyuri could provide. “I want you to bring him to me today after his lessons. I’ll be waiting at the summit,” Chan ordered softly before they separated at the main prayer room where a couple whimpered and cried as a weaker, older man laid in his arms. “Good morning, what can I do for you?” Chan questioned softly to grab their attention but not startle them. The woman of the couple snapped her head up, tears welling up in her eyes as she studied Chan in confusion.

  
“Who are you, boy?” The woman sniffled, rubbing at her eyes to get the tears to halt momentarily but Chan didn’t take her bitterness to heart. He knew he looked like a trainee himself and that the residents don't entirely take him seriously until they see what he can do. Chan laughed quietly, approaching them and kneeling beside the elderly man to study him.

 

“I am the shaman. You seek my assistance, yes?” The couple’s eyes widened at the prospect of this actually being the shaman and they begin apologizing profusely for being so rude. “Do not worry. I understand I look young and more like an apprentice than anything else,” The man reassured before placing his hands gently on the elder man’s chest. “You are hurting aren’t you?” The elder sucked in a harsh breath before breaking out into another fit of coughs and cold sweat, nodding his head erratically in hopes of just someone listening to him and offering him the help he needed.

 

“Shaman, there has been this _demon_ living inside of my father for months. He only seems to take control and use him for his abilities and cause damage to him than to anyone else,” The younger man croaked, Chan flickering his eyes up in astonishment. Chan had come across his fair share of spirits, but they were never as destructive to their vessels as this demon had been. The poor man was covered from head to toe in what looked like lightning strike burns and Chan felt remorse run through him like the thick waves of the ocean crashing into the nearby shore. “Please help us... I just want my father back,” Chan didn’t hesitate to snap his fingers so the elderly man could float alongside him as he heads into the nearby healing room he used for more… _extreme_ cases.

 

The couple followed behind him in scrambled shock and awe, watching the shaman effortlessly turn corners while being careful of the floating man beside him, eyeing the way his creme robes dangled around his feet and turned with grace. “I only use this room for emergencies, so only a few souls can be in here at a time. I ask that you wait outside,” Chan ordered softly, an apologetic glint glimmering in his eyes and while the couple seemed rather unsure, they didn’t argue with him and sat down on the benches outside the door anxiously. Chan gently shut the two doors behind him the moment the elderly man was securely laying on the table in the middle of the smaller room with small fountains that all lead to two basons at the foot and head of the table. Faintly, the wind chimes sang from the wind moving throughout the room coming from the small slits at the tops of the walls where they connected with the peaked roof, and Chan took all the energy he could muster from the natural entities throughout the room to delve into the world inside this man’s soul.

 

Chan’s knees hit the ground, his feet folding underneath him as he began to let his body relax. “Mother, hear me at this time,” Chan whispered into the air, voice coming out so gentle and soft that cherry blossom petals began to drift into the air from his very soul alone, “I need the flames to smoke out this beast inside this poor, innocent man,” The unlit candles all around him lit up within a spark, “I need the water to flush him out and give this man’s body a firm cleanse,” The water began to pour out of the walls and into the fountains that lead into the basons at the head and foot of the table, “But I also need the wind to caress his skin back to health and the life of the mother earth to send her well wishes for this soul,” The wind picked up in the room, brushing along his dark curls that sat upon his head and then through the far more luscious and green plants throughout the room. Now, sparks of flame, droplets of water, and small leaves were swirling all around the room by the current of the wind and Chan snapped his eyes open.

 

“Let me in,” And then there was nothing but planes of absolute darkness ahead of him.

 

Chan stood up on the balls of his feet, every step he made echoing off of the universe around him as if he were walking on glass. “Dirty blood…” A voice hissed all around him, a graveled, warped version of a human’s, and Chan froze. “How can you call yourself pure when your godly blood is mixed with that of a human’s? How can you call yourself a master of the elements when people like you seek out to destroy everything?” The demon muttered bitterly, appearing in front of Chan in the body of the old man he was currently walking around in. “The world is becoming unbalanced because of your kind, _dirty blood_ ,” Chan’s eyes narrowed, clutching the staff in his hand with a surefire grip.

 

“I highly doubt you care about such a world, demon,”

 

“You have to care about a small portion of what you will rule over one day right?” Chan’s eyebrows furrowed in resentment, lips pulling into a scowl, “One day, I will make your mother bend to me, dirty blood, and I will rule the world to terminate dirty blood like you that disrupt the peace between gods and mortals,” Chan rolled his eyes at that, staring blankly at the man before him.

 

“I banish you demon. I use the power of the elements and the mother to rid this man of your ill intentions,”

  
“You are well aware I’ll just jump into another vessel right? Though I suppose I shouldn’t fight this. The old man’s skin feels disgusting,” Chan’s eyes flickered shut, holding both palms embedded with dark symbols out and letting the white light of his mother surge through them. “You are weak, dirty blood! You cannot claim yourself to be a master of the elements you hardly understand! Humans are not supposed to have more than one ability but yet here you are. An abomination,” The man hissed, eyes turning a deep, deep black that matched the planes spread out in front of him.

 

“Gyuri forgives you demon. Be gone,” Chan hushed, butterflies with metallic wings flying out from the light beams leaving the depths of his palms and swarming the old man until the demon was screaming in pain and he was shot up right out of the body he was dwelling in. Chan fell back down to his knees, panting shakily but as soon as his eyes opened again, he was back in the room, the old man sitting up on the table staring down at him in shock. “It is… it is nice to see you awake,” Chan breathed weakly, standing up on shaky legs and eyeing the basons soaked in black water consisting of whatever remains of the demon that was once alive. “Your family is outside,” Chan rasped before going to turn away but the old man grabbed for his hand.

 

“Shaman,” Chan stopped in his tracks, turning back to the elder with a weak, but still fond smile. “That demon… he is not dead,” The old man whispered in fear of the demon hearing. Chan frowned, stepping a bit closer to hold the hands of the poor man who no doubt when through hell and back in the last few weeks if his short time with the demon inside of him didn’t tell him enough. “When I woke up, I saw a trail of black smoke going out those windows!” The man pointed toward the windows along the upper walls with quivering lips and desperate eyes.

 

“Sir, I promise I’ll look into it but you should go home to your family,” Chan hushed, pressing a blessing kiss to the man’s forehead that sent a warm sensation all down the elder’s body, a protective shield placed over him that only Gyuri could produce. “Come on,” Chan guided the man outside through the doors and couple jumped up in anticipation when they saw the man. “All is well. I put a ward over him so there shouldn’t be any more problems. Thank you for coming to me,” Chan bowed politely, but the woman nearly burst into tears when her father in law spoke up.

 

“This man works wonders. Truly a miracle worker,” The man croaked to his family when they enveloped each other into a firm, group hug, “Thank you, Shaman,” The elderly man thanked one more time before his son and daughter in law guided him down the hallway and down the steps they climbed originally to get to the top of the mountain where the temple was located. As soon as there was no one in sight and Chan was free of people, he fell to his knees again and breathed out deeply in hopes of gathering some sort of energy so he could make his way back up to the summit and gather his energy before he speaks with Seungmin and introduces him to Gyuri officially. However, he didn’t manage to gather enough before a few of the priests came around the corner and saw him knelt on the ground.

 

“Shaman!” the youngest of the bunch shrieked, flying forward to curl his hands around Chan’s biceps and guide him back up onto his feet. “What happened? Are you hurt?” The same priest, Hyunwoo, questioned with worry, ears flushing when Chan reached up a shaky hand to envelope his cheek with nothing but warm intentions.

 

“I am quite alright, priest,” Chan tilted Hyunwoo’s head down, reaching up to place a kiss to his forehead that sent waves of warmth and protection down to Hyunwoo’s very soul. “Help me up to the summit, will you?” Chan grinned, allowing Hyunwoo to wrap an arm around his waist and offer a support system as Chan made his way back down the hallway and toward the courtyard where the path to the summit at the top of the hill starts. “How are your studies going? Has Gyuri visited you yet?” Chan questioned out of curiosity, and Hyunwoo’s eyes dropped to the ground in shame.

 

“No… I keep thinking that I’ll see her in the dream realm but it’s almost as if it’s just a trick to get my hopes up,” Hyunwoo admitted, shocked when Chan stopped in his tracks abruptly to turn toward the elder priest and hold his hands in own.

 

“Mother visits everyone at one point or another. I promise to you that she will visit you soon, Hyunwoo,” Chan promise, “Now, palms up,” Hyunwoo flipped his hands around so the back of his hands was rested in Chan’s dark marked palms, and the elder’s markings were revealed. Vibrant purple neon liquid flashed underneath his skin, illuminating the markings on his palms and branching out like lighting strikes and Chan gasped softly when he felt sparks rush down his nerves and creating a satisfying pain. “You’re becoming more powerful aren’t you? Your powers speak to you more and more with each passing day,” Chan hummed softly, and Hyunwoo let out a guttural sob.

 

“Shaman, no matter how hard I try, my body just can’t handle the light of Gyuri,” Hyunwoo whimpered, melting when Chan placed his own two warm palms on Hyunwoo’s cheeks, hooking his fingers behind his ears so Chan had more control of where Hyunwoo’s head shifted. “I was hoping that perhaps if I focused on my own powers enough… I could somehow accept the power of Gyuri into my body easier,” Hyunwoo wasn’t sure if he was supposed to admit such a thing but figured it definitely hadn’t been a bad thing when the shaman brushed one of his thumbs across Hyunwoo’s lips to shush him when he began stuttering out more excuses.

 

“Look at the willow tree, priest,” Chan ordered softly, pushing Hyunwoo’s head so the priest was staring down the willow tree. “Do you see it moving, simply existing within the other elements but not exactly harboring the ability to control all of them?” Hyunwoo nodded solemnly, flickering his head back to Chan’s face when the shaman slid his hands down Hyunwoo’s face, his neck, shoulders, and his arms until he reached Hyunwoo’s hands once more and finally gathered his attention, “it is okay if you do not hold the skill to be everything the universe has to offer,” Chan started, rubbing his thumbs along his knuckles, “it is okay to just simply exist amongst the world,”

 

“Shaman…” Hyunwoo trailed off in unsureness but Chan leaned forward slowly to press a lingering kiss to Hyunwoo’s chin, saying everything he needed to. “I am so happy to have a friend like you in my life, shaman,” Hyunwoo rasped, wrapping Chan up into a tight hug and Chan laughed softly.

 

“I suppose I’m slightly more than just a friend at this point,” Hyunwoo flushed at that, backing away in embarrassment. “Now go, I’ll see you later this evening,” Chan shooed Hyunwoo away so he could make his own way up the summit and watch the towns beneath him fall into their every day lives with ease. It was always a calming sight to see as everyone walking around like syncronized ants.

 

Chan sat in the middle of the summit with a heavy breath, letting his eyes flutter shut and falling into that plane between his mother’s realm and reality, the plane where everything coexists with one another, the plane where Chan felt the most at home. More times than not, especially nowadays with the trainees on their way to being priests, Chan found himself in the plane rather often. He found himself in that pure realm of colors and elements that swaddled him in nothing but warmth and comfort. It was addicting at this point, and a part of him wished he could throw himself in that realm for the rest of eternity. Perhaps everything would be better for everyone if he could. His trainees would be fine on their own. The council would be fine.

 

Seungmin would make a fine replacement.

 

Chan sunk further and further into the realm between while simultaneously disconnecting himself from reality in an alarming manner. Even when he was stuck in this realm, he made sure not to go so far he was no longer able to sense things but it seems as though he was so far deep he wasn’t aware time had passed, the sun was beginning to set, and another soul joined him on the summit, calling out to him but when receiving no response, decided to approach Chan. The poor shaman was snapped out of the realm when a cautious, shaky hand landed on his shoulder and a quiet, “Shaman?” left a pair of lips that were all too familiar. Chan steadied his breathing, not saying anything before patting the spot next to him at the middle of the summit. Seungmin scrambled to his knees, watching Chan out of curiosity as the shaman relaxed his tense body once more. “Shaman… can I ask you a question?” Seungmin could hinder his curiosity any more, practically squirming and Chan laughed fondly in his direction.

 

“Of course,”

 

“Why did you call me here? Master Priest said it was important, and I don’t mean to rush but my studies are very important and-” Seungmin’s panicked rambling was cut off by Chan reaching out and pulling back Seungmin’s hood so he could run his hand along the back of the boy’s head, and Seungmin stared at him in bewilderment as Chan acted as if it were the most normal thing ever.

 

“You’ve been working very hard, haven’t you?” Seungmin flushed at the question, twitching his head away as he stuttered over his words.

 

“I don’t know if I would consider it as ‘hard’ work, shaman… I could definitely be doing more,” It was a lie, Chan knew that much. More times than not, Seungmin was up into the wee hours of the morning trying to get as much practice and studying in as possible because he was determined to become more than just a priest. Seungmin had the determination Gyuri looked for, and Chan couldn’t hold the boy back anymore. He was ready.

 

“Seungmin… you are…” Chan was normally quite good with words but he found it difficult to find them at the moment. Nonetheless, Seungmin waited patiently, peering up at his shaman shyly but with almost fearful eyes, “You have so much potential. You’re heart’s determination to be the best it can be in the eyes of Gyuri is admirable, but if you wish to reach the highest of placements, studying in your room will not get you to those placements,” Chan hushed, and Seungmin’s eyes lit up in both shock in curiosity. The boy’s giddiness at Chan’s word had the shaman cooing lightly in his own head, “For now, I want you to join me at the summit in the evenings and I will teach you what it’s like for us,”

  
“Us?” Seungmin dared to croak out and Chan’s twinkling eyes of mischief met his with a grin to match.

 

“One day, you will replace me as the grand shaman and you will make your own legacy,” Seungmin nearly broke down in tears at that, the only thing keeping him from doing so being the realization that Chan was right there and Seungmin didn’t want to show weakness. “That is many years in the future though, and for now your goal is to reach a point where you can join us in the final council member chair,” Chan grinned from ear to ear, “So, join me. Have you ever been to the realm between, little lion?” Seungmin flushed, looking almost panicked as he peered down at the ground shyly.

 

“Only a few times… I couldn’t hold it for longer than a few moments,” Seungmin admitted, but Chan was still pleasantly impressed. It was hard to reach the realm without all the elements at your disposal but the fact that Seungmin was able to still achieve it especially as inexperienced as he was… it was impressive.

 

“It’s easier to reach at the summit, but the fact that you’ve been able to do it already only proves my theories,” Chan admits, “Now join me. Focus on the power of the summit and all of the equally as powerful elements here,” Chan guided, watching Seungmin’s hands fold into his lap, legs relaxing underneath his weight and eyes fluttering shut. Chan watched Seungmin’s breathing even out and after a few moments, Chan knew Seungmin was starting to slip into that realm where Gyuri could grab him and take him up into her own. At that, Chan relaxed into his own body as well, listening to the power of the elements as he called out to his mother mentally, feeling the rushing cold against his skin of the pit of the universe and that same familiar smell of heat and flowers combined. “Hello, mother,”

 

“Hello, Chan. It’s very nice to see you again,” Chan let his eyes open so he could look his mother in the eye, lifting himself up off of his knees and approaching his mother with eyes squinted and shifted into thin crescents do to the smile on his lips. “What can I do for you, boy?” The woman lifted herself from her throne so she was on the ground with Chan, peering up at him fondly as her hands came up to poke and prod at his face with a look of pure pride. Chan had aged so well and Gyuri was prideful that she had managed to create something so beautiful.

 

“There is a trainee, a devote follower to you and I strongly believe he will replace me as shaman when the time comes. I want you to meet him and I want him to finally see you as a true mother,” The woman seemed unsure of this request, furrowing her eyebrows in confusion but didn’t ask anything more but a few basic questions that realistically, any mother would ask about someone their kid is around.

 

“What is his name?”

 

“Kim Seungmin,” The woman perked up at that, recognizing that name well and even going as far as to beam.

 

“Such a sweet boy. He prays to me quite frequently and he has everything but ill intentions. If I didn’t know any better, I’d almost ask you to ask for his hand in marriage so I know you’re going to be okay,” Chan’s little brother and sister giggled at that, Chan flushing and shaking his head dismissively.

 

“I’m afraid not, mother. Even if I didn’t see him as almost a son, I’m afraid someone else has caught my eye,” The woman’s eyebrows shot up at this.

 

“Oh?”

 

“I will tell you about it another time, mother. But for now, Kim Seungmin is waiting patiently in the between plane for someone to come along and snatch him up,” Chan winked and the woman just laughed, turning back to step up into her throne before patting Chan’s empty throne in hopes of the man stepping up and taking it. Chan didn’t disappoint, even willing all of their vessels and thrones to shoot up in size so they looked 10x more intimidating. Chan may have been a shaman and his mother a god, but that didn’t mean they didn’t have some sort of sense of humor. “Ready?”

 

“Ready,”

 

And then, in the middle of the room, kneeled Kim Seungmin in the same position he was in on Earth and it took a few moments for the younger to realize what had been going on and open his eyes to the new plane around him. “Oh…” Seungmin gasped out, looking around at the multiple glazes surrounding him in wonder before his eyes laid on the four thrones before him, all at different sizes and the gasp that tumbled out of his lips when he saw Chan and then Gyuri next to him, sitting tall and proud, was both comical but endearing. “Mother!” Seungmin shrieked, bowing deeply, forehead hitting the ground, and Gyuri giggled quietly at the sight.

 

“On your feet, Kim Seungmin,” the boy scrambled up, hands folding behind his back anxiously and Chan knew he was picking lightly at his nails as some sort of coping mechanism. Chan had eyes everywhere here, “You’ve served me well, Kim Seungmin,” Gyuri started with a small smile, “You’re devotion is most present to me and I am grateful to have followers like you,” Seungmin flushed at that, “My son tells me that you are the next in line for shaman and I presume that means you will be apart of the council?” Chan nodded to her at that, ignoring the way Seungmin gaped at him when she uttered ‘son’ “I am most happy to have you there. For now, however, you will work towards that position alongside my son and he will show you the ropes of the gift,” Gyuri stepped down from her throne, approaching Seungmin with graceful steps with the long tail of her dress shirt flowing behind her gracefully.

 

Seungmin let out a sob when the woman cupped his cheeks and pressed a warm kiss to his forehead, the feeling spreading so evenly all across his body, the blood in his veins began to boil from all the heat. “W-What is happening? It hurts,” Seungmin whimpered weakly and Chan stepped down from his throne to comfort the poor boy but Gyuri held her hand out. Seungmin needed to go through this alone to truly show just how strong he was. Seungmin let out a shrill, long scream that would have burst a mortal’s eardrums at the intensity of it but Chan simply flinched back and squeezed his eyes shut. He hated this part, he hated listening to it because he couldn’t bear the thought of seeing and hearing people he cared about hurt. Suddenly, Seungmin’s screams faded out and he fell limp into Gyuri’s chest, the goddess petting his hair and singing softly.

 

“My sweet boy,” She hushed and Seungmin let out a weak, broken sob. “You are so strong. You will serve me well for the rest of your days. I just know it,” The goddess praised softly and Seungmin nodded weakly, “Take my gift and move with large strides, my sweet boy,” and the goddess passed the boy off to Chan, allowing her son to put the follower back together with soft touches and even softer words. Seungmin was panting heavily, on the verge of a panic attack at this rate but Chan tried his best to calm the poor boy down for the most part.

 

“Thank you, mother,” Seungmin choked out when he managed to pull himself together and the woman nodded, snapping her fingers and sending Seungmin back into his realm, right where he was kneeled at the summit and with a broken sob, his body slumped forward and his forehead hit the stone ground of the summit as he began whispering small prayers and thank yous under his breath. Did that really just happen? _Did he really just meet Gyuri and…_ Seungmin snapped out of his thoughts when a soft hand slipped onto his back and began rubbing soothing circles into the muscles there. Seungmin jolted up, wrapping Chan up in a tight embrace and sobbing into his neck. “Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you,” Seungmin kept whispering into his skin and Chan giggled quietly.

 

“It was time you met her, little lion. Now,” Chan pulled away from Seungmin, holding his freshly dark marked palms in his own and tracing over them lightly, “My mother has given you something so powerful that some don’t really know how to comprehend it…” Seungmin gulped, glassy eyes wavering and Chan hummed in content at the boys worry that Chan might deem him untrustworthy for his power, “So, for right now I will be training you. Meet me here after your physical training with Minho tomorrow and we’ll go from there,”

 

“Shaman… are you a god?”

 

Chan chuckled lowly at that, shaking his head, “Not fully. I am merely a half god. My father was a mortal,” Chan explained briefly as he stood them both back up on their feet, “Now, go back to your dorm and get some sleep. I better not see your light on past the raven’s song,” Chan shoved the boy along the path and guided him back toward the temple where Minho was waiting by the door out of curiosity.

 

“So… you finally met her have you?” Minho grinned quietly and Seungmin nodded shyly, rubbing the back of his neck with pink cheeks. “Good. I’m glad she approves of you,” Minho uttered softly, reaching out to drag his palm down the side of Seungmin’s head and stroke his hair fondly. Minho leaned down to whisper something in Seungmin’s ear that Chan couldn’t hear but he’s almost glad that he didn’t. He didn’t think it was his place based on how close and intimate they were with one another.

 

“Don’t forget that you’re not alone, brothers,” Chan rasped with a smirk, watching Seungmin flinch away but Minho merely spared Chan a quick glance before he trained his eyes on Seungmin once more. It was rather endearing how Minho looked at Seungmin. “Now go. Minho, do not keep him up all night,” Chan ordered seriously and Minho nodded once before placing a hand on the back of Seungmin’s back and guiding him down the hallway toward the elder’s room while Chan trailed off in the opposite direction, out through the eastern entrance and toward the small huts on the mountainside lit up by torches. Chan knocked twice on the door to Hyunwoo’s hut before the elder came rushing over, slinging open the door in confusion but eyes lighting up when he saw Chan stood there. “Hello,” Chan greeted with a small grin.

 

“Shaman,” Hyunwoo uttered, bowing slightly but Chan huffed, placing a hand on Hyunwoo’s bare chest and shoving him inside the hut before kicking the door shut behind him.

 

“That’s enough of your formalities, priest,” Chan grunted, cornering Hyunwoo on the bed and straddling his thighs as he lightly dragged his fingernails down his torso. Hyunwoo laughed lightly, slipping his own hands up so they a were rubbing up and down from Chan’s waist to his hips. “I missed you,” Chan whispered shyly, pressing a gentle kiss to Hyunwoo’s chin to make the elder, stronger man melt in his arms. It felt like it had been ages since they were allowed to be together like this due to Hyunwoo's training to be a priest and Chan’s role as a shaman.

 

“I missed you too,” Hyunwoo hushed, pressing a kiss to Chan’s nose and nuzzling them together. “You work too hard, you really worried me today,” Hyunwoo grunted, flipping them around so Chan was underneath him but the shaman was far from discontent. He always enjoyed the pressure of someone else on top of him. Chan didn’t even feel uncomfortable as Hyunwoo began to peel the hood off of Chan’s head so he could get rid of the robes it was attached to. In fact, Chan kicked off his shoes as Hyunwoo worked, a giddy feeling bubbling in his chest. It was always a wonder how Hyunwoo could manage to make Chan feel like a teenager again. When Chan was just left in his trousers, Hyunwoo lowered his body down so he could pepper kisses down Chan’s neck, shoulders, chest, and tummy, spreading shivers and goosebumps all across Chan’s nerves.

 

“Hyunwoo…” Chan trailed off with a content whisper when Hyunwoo began marking beautiful flowers between the tattoos that represent the power deep inside all up and down Chan’s body. Hyunwoo laughed quietly against his skin before trailing back upward so they could clasp their lips together. Chan may have wanted to coexist with the elements for the rest of his life, but he would be perfectly fine just existing with Hyunwoo for the rest of his days if it meant the elder was always there. Chan didn’t know if he was solely invested in Hyunwoo, but he was far from just infatuated at this current moment, “I love you,” Chan gasped out, sweat trickling down his forehead.

 

Hyunwoo stopped for a moment, arms holding himself up on either side of Chan’s head trembling lightly. “I love you too,”

  
  


“Shaman! I’m so sorry I’m late!” Chan peeped one eye open to see Seungmin running up the hill, panting heavily and looking rather out of breath but Chan just cocked his head to the side. “Apologies. I got held up at training,” Seungmin’s hands rested on his knees, hunched over and Chan couldn’t help but laugh to himself softly.

 

“It’s quite alright. It’s not as if I leave the summit until nightfall anyway, little lion” Chan shrugged as if it were nothing because truthfully, it was. Seungmin came on his own time but it seemed Seungmin didn’t quite understand that when he did nothing but furrow his eyebrow and stare Chan down in pure confusion. “You come on your own time, Seungmin. This is about you and you wanting this. So, it’s okay if you need to take a breather every now and then,” Chan further explained.

 

“Shaman… this is a breather for me,” Chan grinned at that, happy that Seungmin enjoyed these sessions as much as he did, so patted the spot next to him confidently.

 

“Then come and join me, little lion” Chan hushed and Seungmin fell to his knees beside Chan and felt himself preparing his mind and body for the plane between where he frequently explored the never-ending colors. Seungmin had merely been tracing his fingers along the dark blue bark of a tree when Chan suddenly appeared beside him, “Come on,” Seungmin was unsure as to how Chan found him so quickly in this vast plane but took his hand anyway and let Chan drag him along the deep, beautiful red grass underneath him. Except, suddenly they were floating and Seungmin couldn’t help but let out a few giggles and shrieks of happiness when he began soaring through the cotton candy clouds with Chan gracefully following him with much less vigor but instead fondness. “This is the energy we look for, you know? We look for this bright happy energy because that’s what fuels her,” Chan called out to him and that only seemed to widen Seungmin’s smile. The boy was practically a giddy mess at this point.

  
Suddeny, Chan grabbed for Seungmin’s hand and they dived back below the clouds and toward the ground where a small hut was surrounded by luscious, red and pink fields that were perfect for training. “Where are we going, Shaman?” Seungmin questioned, but Chan just grinned from ear to ear.

 

“This is where I first began practicing, and this is where I took Minho when he started practicing. So now… Now I’m going to take you as well,” Chan explained, feet hitting the soft ground underneath him and helping Seungmin stabilize himself when he landed a bit roughly. “Go stand in the middle over there,” Chan shooed him off and Seungmin practically darted over towards the middle of the field. “We’re going to start small okay?” Seungmin nodded once, “I want you to think of the heat you felt the first time the power entered you and then I want you to shift it to your palm. Internally, literally swipe it down your arm and into your palm,” Seungmin’s palms began to tingle, the markings itching harshly but Seungmin ignored them for the time being. “Think of a small ball in your hand. A small, crystalized ball much like the material you saw the thrones made out of,”

 

Seungmin concentrated, and concentrated, and concentrated but it didn’t ever go past the tingling in his palms, and Seungmin let out a deflated sigh, “Chan, it’s not working,”

 

“Than think of something that makes you happy,” Seungmin’s eyes lit up at that and in the time span of what just a tiny snap of his fingers would be, two perfect crystalized balls formed in his palms and Seungmin stared down at them in shock. “Throw them to me,” Chan caught them with ease and set them on the ground before murmuring, “Again,” and Seungmin kept summoning crystal balls and throwing them to Chan until he was producing four at a time with ease.

 

“What am I supposed to do with all of these?” Seungmin frowned at the pile of balls beside Chan’s feet but the elder just shook his head.

 

“Patience, Seungmin,” Chan scolded lightly, cooing internally at the younger’s flushed cheeks, “I’m going to throw a ball up in the air and you’re going to imagine that it shatters in the air,” Chan explained, “Ready?” Seungmin answered him by shifting his stance and straightening his back, nodding once. Chan threw a ball in the air, but as much as Seungmin concentrated, the next three balls ended up hitting the ground and shattering before they shattered at the will of Seungmin’s mind. When Chan threw up the fifth ball, Seungmin let out a groan of frustration and a branch of a nearby tree suddenly snapped off of the trunk and came flying towards the ball and through the crystal, causing it to shatter. Chan watched it with a blank stare for a moment, not expecting anything so violent, “Okay, damn. Remind me to never make you angry,” Chan chuckled softly and Seungmin flushed.

 

“Sorry…”

 

“No need to apologize. Again. And try something different this time,” The fact of the matter was that Seungmin was already well on his way to being a pro during his first lessons so Chan was beyond proud to know that the boy had broken half of the next balls with rocks, grass wrapping so tightly around it that the ball shattered, and even once, ice came out of nowhere and spiked through it like some sort of damn pencil in a balloon. There were a few balls left before the world around them began to rumble and they were forced back into their reality when shouts of Chan’s name echoed in their ears. When their eyes snapped open, Chan was met with the sight of a very angry Hyunwoo stood at the edge of the summit watching them with a bitter gleam in his eyes. Though… something felt off. Something besides the unnerving anger. “What is it, priest?”

 

It was more of a warning then it was a question, a warning for Hyunwoo not to make a fool of himself in front of a prodigy but the vein on Hyunwoo’s forehead looked ready to burst. “Can we talk, Shaman?” Hyunwoo gritted out and Chan’s guard went up just a tiny little more securely as he got up and approached Hyunwoo, even patting Seungmin’s shoulder to keep him in place. “Great,” Hyunwoo spat, grabbing for Chan’s wrist tightly and dragging him away but when the grip started to hurt, Chan pulled back roughly and ripped his wrist out of the elder’s grip.

 

“That’s enough, Hyunwoo. What did you want?” Chan huffed, massaging his aching wrist with a scowl but Hyunwoo didn’t care. “Speak!” Chan boomed when Hyunwoo was trying to get his words together. Firstly, Chan was interrupted during his lessons, secondly, Hyunwoo was being unnecessarily angry and cruel at the moment, and thirdly, a priest was treating him as if he were a doll. His sudden ferocity only seemed to strengthen Hyunwoo’s and Chan was left staring deep into the pits of Hyunwoo’s dark eyes. This wasn’t Hyunwoo. There was something different in his eyes from all the other times Chan had seen Hyunwoo furious. There was something inside Hyunwoo that had taken control but Chan kept his mouth shut for now.

 

“You took a kid to see Gyuri before me? Your _lover_ ?” Chan’s eyes softened at that, realizing how awful it was that Chan had introduced seungmin before Hyunwoo but… this was a matter of business. “You really let some kid have the light before me? You tell me all day long to wait for her but _you take him to her!_ ” Chan knew it was wrong, but the man was being irrational.

 

“This was about business, _priest_ ,” Hyunwoo flinched at the use of his title, “Seungmin is very important in this temple as one day he’ll be overseeing all of you,” Hyunwoo’s eyes nearly bulged out of his head, mouth opening and closing like a fish, “It’s nothing but business and preparation. I was actually going to take you to see my mother but now I’m not so sure,” Chan scolded going to turn away but Hyunwoo called out his name one last time with a little more anger but the shaman turned back toward him sharply, enough to cause the wind to pick up and the silver of his eyes to turn white, “ _Don’t forget who you’re talking to, priest,_ ” The sky rumbled all around them, Hyunwoo’s shoulders tense and stance slumped as he panted heavily, and Chan was dumb enough to ignore it.

 

Suddenly, within a snap of a finger, Chan’s back hit the temple wall, a hand around his throat and Hyunwoo’s face in his own, “ _Take me to her,_ ” It wasn’t Hyunwoo’s voice, but instead the weird variation of the one man’s voice he had listened to a few weeks ago. This only confirmed Chan’s suspicions, so perhaps he wouldn’t feel as bad doing what he was about to do. With a loud, gruff roar, the light within Chan’s bones began to shine and burn the demon’s hands that were clasped around him, so much so that the black mist Chan had seen before began to seep out of the demon’s pores. Once the demon’s hands were loose enough around Chan’s neck, the shaman allowed a beam of light to sprout from his chest and hit the demon so hard that he went flying back, hitting a tree and causing it to crack and fall from the sheer force of the blow.

 

“Minho!” Chan called out in desperation, rushing down the steps to reach the demon before he could go anywhere and creating a shield around him that kept him contained for the time being. It took a minute before he saw Minho rushing through one of the temple doors and over toward Chan who was kneeled on the ground, holding the forcefield with a wince taking over his facial features.

 

“What the hell happened?” Minho questioned with a gasp but Chan just waved him off.

 

“Questions later. Just get him to the main healing room,” Chan grunted, getting rid of the forcefield and helping Minho drag Hyunwoo’s body to the main healing room, one much stronger than the last one he used and he hoped that now that Minho was there to help, that the demon would finally be destroyed. “Set him on the table,” Chan rushed out, locking the doors behind him and focusing on all the elements in the room along with the power of Gyuri. Minho seemed to have gotten the memo as well as he gripped Chan’s hands over Hyunwoo’s squirming body on the table, producing crystal binds across his body so the demon couldn’t go anywhere.

 

“ _Let me go, weaklings!_ ” But Chan and Minho paid him no mind, mumbling enchantments and prayers under their breaths in unison as leaves, cherry blossom petals, water droplets, and little sparks of flames flew all around them in a rapid tornado, “ _I said let me go!_ ” They ignored the way the temple shook all around them and focused on the way the elements shifted and moved to their will. It was only when an all too familiar light trail added into the elemental mix did they deem it time.

 

“Let me in this body!” They screamed in unison, snapping open their eyes when the wind stopped and everything turned black around them. They were in the same soul chamber Chan had been in before, the two stood side by side and staffs in hand at the ready. Across from them was Hyunwoo, having the same stance he had before he pinned Chan to the wall and the shaman gulped. All the feelings he shoved away before were starting to hit him now and he realized that whatever this was… this demon was dangerous and Hyunwoo was no longer Hyunwoo, even if the demon was gone and vanished from the world. This demon left behind a bitter taste in your mouth and Chan feared for his lover’s sanity once it was rid of the demon.

 

Though he should have worried about something a little more.

 

Hyunwoo laughed evilly, the cackle bouncing off of the void walls and Minho shivered at the sound of it. “Look at you… weak, weak mortals. Well, except for you, dirty blood. Though I’m not quite sure why you would bother bringing a mortal to this fight,” The demon cackled, a snarl to his tone but Minho remained unbothered. They always heard this whenever they fought demons together. These ‘insults’ fell onto deaf ears now. “But I suppose it doesn’t bother you does it?” Chan and Minho eyes the demon wearily, “Let’s try something else… Like that mortal boy, you two have grown attached to,” Minho’s grip on his staff tightened so harshly that his knuckles became as white as his teeth, “Kim Seungmin wasn’t it?”

 

“Don’t you dare utter his name,” Minho snapped, throwing a shard of ice in the man’s general direction but it stopped mid-air when Hyunwoo’s hand reached out, the hand twisting and pushing outward so the shard went flying back toward Minho. The mortal dodged it with ease but his chest still heaved up and down at a slightly heavier rate. The demon cackled, eyes snapping toward Chan expectantly.

 

“This is why you don’t bring mortals to godly fights, dirty blood,” The demon snapped but Chan remained calm and collected, gripping his staff firmly but not tight enough to possibly hurt and restrain the energy inside.

 

“You are nothing but a petty demon. You are no god,”

 

“Ah, but neither are you,”

 

“I never claimed to be one,” It was calm but icy, and he could slowly see the demon losing his patience. He wanted Chan to snap, but he was running out of cards to play.

 

“Have you never heard of me, dirty blood? They write legends about me, you know,” Chan’s expression remained blank but his mind was sifting through all the stories he had been told over the years but none of them were matching up, “Ah but… I painfully suppose I’ve been forgotten but no longer… One day I will take what your mother has and use it to its highest potential, just as it deserves,” The demon swore, his words flying out and dissolving into black mist right before Chan’s very eyes, “One day, humans and other gods alike will learn to fear Chanyeol and I will _bask_ in it,” Chan knew that if the demon did not hold to his swears now, that the black mist will come back and kill him, but now that Chan knew his name… this became more dangerous than Chan could ever believe.

 

Chanyeol is one of the highest classed demons, once working alongside the god of hell himself to send the world into the next destructive era. Chanyeol was the reason for the great wars and some believe he was the reason for the many lost cities throughout the ages. Chan knew that if Chanyeol were to ever get his hands on the power Chan’s mother harbored… the whole world would be nothing but a playground for the demon. This idea only coursed fear through him but Chan tried his best to keep his ground and mind stable. “I’m sorry that you have been forgotten, Chanyeol, but your thirst for my mother’s power is what will get you killed,” Chan hushed, slamming his staff down on the ground and creating a light trail that moved at lightning speed toward the demon.

 

But Chanyeol was faster than the trail and suddenly appeared in front of Minho, catching him off guard and grabbing him by the throat. But Minho didn’t teach hand to hand combat on a daily basis to not be a master, and before Chanyeol could lift the man up into the air, Minho swung his foot up to hit the demon in the side of the knee, sending his hand flying and body stumbling. With swift, easy movements, Minho knocked both of his arms back and sent a kick into Chanyeol’s chest causing him to fly back at an alarming rate. Chan grabbed Minho’s fallen staff and tossed it to the waiting mortal with a huff. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Minho. He’s purposefully trying to make you snap,” Chan scolded, flinching a bit when he heard Hyunwoo’s warped cackle.

 

“Yes, mortal. Don’t get angry when I swear I’ll hurt Seungmin to the highest degree,” The words flew out, more mist filling the room, “Or when I swear I’ll make him my puppet,” It came out like a grunt, but that didn’t stop the words flying into the air and creating the same black mist the other ones had made. Chanyeol was slowly lifting himself off of the ground when Minho looked on the verge of a temper tantrum. “You’re so in love with him it's sickening,” Chan’s gaze snapped to Minho in surprise. He knew there was always a slight infatuation there but he didn’t think… “You mortals and your petty love. You know it’ll get you killed one day don’t you? You know that love will never give you what hate and power do right?” Minho growled lowly in his throat, “You’ve spent the last three years loving a boy who won’t ever love you back. A boy who wishes to reach the top of the tree and will do anything to get there, even if it means involving himself with you and then dropping you when you are no longer of use to him,”

 

Nothing of what Chanyeol was saying was necessarily true and Minho knew that but his anger got the best of him. _How dare he say something like that, right?_ However, this was Chanyeol’s game. This is what he wants. Minho let out a war cry and ran straight toward Chanyeol, staff out but suddenly, the man took all the angry energy Minho gave off and bent it to his will. Hands landed on the staff and tore it from Minho’s hands, breaking it over his knees and watching all the energy inside the staff ooze out and start whirling around in fear of where they were supposed to go, where they were supposed to escape to. But Chan and Minho watched the elements get sucked in by the black mist of the demons in horror and Chanyeol only became stronger with each passing second. “You are weak mortal,” Chanyeol hissed, taking the two broken staff pieces and stabbing them through his stomach and Chan watched in horror.

 

“Minho!”

 

Chanyeol snapped his head up at that, locking eyes with the half-blood and ripping the staff parts out of his stomach with a grunt. “You’re next, dirty blood,” The staff parts went flying in Chan’s general direction, just narrowly missing the parts and landing on the floor with a whimper, falling on his hand wrong and prompting a sharp pain to fly up through his arm from his wrist. “You couldn’t get rid of me the first time, what makes you think you can do it now? When I’m oh so much stronger and-” Suddenly, Hyunwoo’s face appeared through the mist, saddened and lovelorn, “the love of your life?” Hyunwoo’s normal, unwarped voice echoed across the room and Chan let out a sob.

 

“I’m sorry, Hyunwoo,” Chan rasped before his body began to lift up into the air and a crystalized field appeared around him, letting out beams of life that caused the dark mist to hiss and evaporate into thin air. “I command you to leave this body and never return! I banish you from this realm!” Chan’s voice boomed off of the walls, the light reaching Hyunwoo’s body and his familiar screams bouncing off the walls.

 

“This isn’t over, Bang Chan! Enjoy your dead lover,” and then Chan was snapping his eyes back open with a gasp, nearing falling into Hyunwoo’s limp, unbreathing body as Minho choked on his own blood.

 

“Minho…” Chan rasped, whirling his head around when Minho’s hands slipped out of his own and fell backward and hit the ground with a thump and a whine. “Fuck. Seungmin!” Chan faintly heard footsteps getting louder and louder as the doors to the healing door slammed open and Seungmin stood in the doorway with fear clear on his features.

 

“M-Minho-” Seungmin looked on the verge of tears, Chan scrambling over to him grabbing him by the shoulders.

 

“I need you to channel your fear and love for him and heal him. Go,” Chan shoved the boy over to the man on the ground, lip latched between his teeth. He knew that Seungmin wouldn’t be able to heal Minho fully and he would have to step in but luckily, they had enough time to see what Seungmin was truly capable of. If Chan didn’t push him then who would? Seungmin lowered himself down onto his knees, the limbs touching Minho’s sides and gathering the man’s attention so their eyes were locked.

 

“My god, Minho…” Seungmin trailed off with a croak, staring down his body unsure of what to do. With shaky hands, Minho grabbed Seungmin’s and lowered them down so Seungmin’s hands were flat on Minho’s wounds.

 

“I need you to imagine that I’m healed and in your arms, Seungmin. I need you to channel your love. That’s all Gyuri thrives off of. You can do it,” Minho rasped, removing one bloodied hand from on top of Seungmin’s and stroking the younger’s cheek lightly. “It’ll be okay,” Seungmin let out a choked sob and nodded, focusing on the heat inside his chest alongside the urgency and love he had for Minho to be okay. “That’s it,” Minho’s skin slowly began to piece itself back together but there was a moment, a tiny sliver where if it didn’t heal, Minho could very well die, and Seungmin couldn’t make it past that moment.

 

“Chan! Chan, I’m not strong enough,” Seungmin cried out, sounding strained and Chan darted forward, falling to Minho’s other side and placing his hands on the man’s stomach. And then everything stopped. Seungmin and Chan’s powers worked so well in unison that Minho only needed those few more seconds before he passed out from the pain and his body was sent into recovery. Seungmin fell back, breathing heavily and the tears in his eyes began to slip, “I wasn’t strong enough…”

 

“Little Lion… do you know why I call you that?” Seungmin simply shook his head with a frown appearing on his lips, “Because you are one. You are going to be so, so strong one day but for now, you are little and you will need to grow to reach that point. Do not blame yourself, little lion,” and Seungmin nodded, allowing the elder to cup his cheeks and feather a paternal kiss to his forehead. “Now go. Take Minho to his room and stay with him,” Seungmin nodded, getting up before bending down to carry Minho out of the room bridal style, and perhaps if he hesitated a moment to trace a finger along his features, then so be it. That was entirely his business. Chan waited, kneeled on the ground until Seungmin was out the door and it slammed shut behind him.

 

That was when he finally let the tears hit him, that was when he finally let himself drape over Hyunwoo’s unmoving body and weep until he couldn’t weep anymore. Hyunwoo wasn’t his soulmate, Chan knew that much, but that didn’t mean he was any less in love with him. This hurt, just as losing a loved one would, but Chan couldn’t help but blame himself for this. Maybe if he had been more careful then Minho wouldn’t be on the brink of losing his life and Hyunwoo wouldn’t be dead.

 

_“It is okay, my son,”_

 

“What am I to do, mother? He’s still out there.”

 

_“Perhaps it’s time to use his own methods to banish him, hm?”_

  


“So you’re trying to tell me we have to summon the eruption of Mount Hallasan and destroy everything just to banish him?” Minho was laying down on his bed, a look of pure bewilderment on his features. Chan’s eyes flickered down to the ground shyly, knowing how fucking insane it sounded but Chan had done a lot of reading over the week and realized that the only way to banish a demon was to use the same means against him that he would use on someone else. So… destruction. “I mean… It’s a good idea but that’s going to destroy the whole town, Chan. The whole temple. That will erase everything!”

 

Chan stayed quiet for a moment, “Maybe it’s for the best… Maybe we _need_ to be erased from history,” Seungmin dropped his quill, starring Chan down. “Think about it. People are starting to show up to the temple with bombs! We’re unsafe here now. We’re unsafe from the world. It’s time for a reset,” Chan hushed, voice cracking slightly and Seungmin and Minho were left staring at each other.

 

“Where will we go?”

 

“I’m not sure,”

 

It was quiet for a moment, “I think we should do it,” Minho snapped his head toward Seungmin in astonishment.

 

“Seungmin!”

 

“You haven’t been down to the city in years!” Seungmin argued, “You don’t know what it’s like anymore. If you don’t work for the temple and you have these,” Seungmin raised his palms up so they could see the markings on them, “they’ll kill you. In front of hundreds of people who won’t do _anything_ ,” Seungmin’s voice was dark, “besides, the quicker that demon is gone, the better,” Minho and Chan shared a look, not quite sure what to do with this information and sudden shift in mood from the younger.

 

“My love…” Minho hushed, placing a hand on Seungmin’s shoulder to pull him back to listen to him and Seungmin’s face softened considerably. “Where is all of this coming from?”

 

Seungmin was quiet for a moment, “Seeing you like that made me so angry, Minho. All that blood… _your_ blood,” Minho feathered a kiss to Seungmin’s cheek lightly, nuzzling his nose into the skin there with a small hum.

 

“That’s not the only thing, though, is it?” Chan questioned, seeing the hesitation in his eyes. Seungmin waited for a moment, not sure if he should answer that or not but found it best to probably just get it over and done with.

 

“I got a threat the other day from a townsperson I was guiding. They said that on October 21st, they’d set the temple aflame,” and Chan froze.

  
“Was their voice normal?” Minho questioned instantly, “Like was it warped or anything?” Minho was more frantic at this point, shifting Seungmin so the younger was fully looking at him but Minho still had a tight, protective grip over him.

 

“Only a little bit but I didn’t have a chance to ask him about it before he turned back around and ran back toward the city. I was scared, but I thought it was an empty threat so I didn’t say anything,” Seungmin admitted with a frown and wide, shy eyes and Seungmin faintly resembled a child who was too scared to get scolded at the moment. Chan felt every muscle in his body tense at that, this was only a few days from now and Chan had no doubt in his mind that that was Chanyeol. “I’m sorry,”

 

“Don’t apologize, little lion,” Chan hushed, eyes flickering back up to face them, and they were much darker than before, much more determined, “We need to prepare. I’ll be at the summit,” and then Chan left them, slamming the door behind them and heading up to the summit where he could look down into the volcano underneath with determination. “You will breathe again, Mount Hallasan,”

  
  


Loud, chiming bells rang off of the mountain range on the island and Chan snapped his eyes open, eyeing the heat waves coming off of the volcano in front of him. He’s surprised he’s lasted this long from the heat in front of him, but the anxiety of the situation began to set in and he realized that this was it. The bells meant Chanyeol was here and it was time. Chan, Minho, and Seungmin were the only ones left in the temple now, the bells having been rigged to sense when demons entered the temple yesterday and Chan was so ungodly it worked and that the other prodigies were now halfway back to the mainland where they will be so much safer.

 

“It’s time. He’s here,” Seungmin uttered from behind him and Chan nodded mutely, walking down the trail that leads to the summit and toward the entrance to the temple where Minho had Chanyeol’s current vessel cornered.

 

“Welcome back, Chanyeol,” Chan hushed so sweetly it was obvious he meant it as nothing more than something entirely bitter. “Come. We will have a fair fight at the summit,” Chan lead the demon to the summit, Minho holding his new staff against Chanyeol’s back to make sure he didn’t try anything funny.

 

“Why the summit?”

 

“Because only there can you reach, Gyuri, and you plan on taking her place once you defeat us, do you not?” Chan questioned casually, and Chanyeol kept his mouth shut after that, trying to figure out what kind of game the humans are playing. He never did quite understand their way of thinking as much as he did the way they could plummet into self-destruction after just a few words.

 

“Us?”

 

“You will be fighting all three of us because it should be fair right?”

 

“That’s three on one,”

 

“I thought you were powerful? Surely two mortals and _dirty blood_ shouldn’t be a problem,” Chan spat, turning around once he reached the middle of the summit, and Seungmin flinched slightly when the volcano behind Chan began to rumble and shoot out a few spurts of lava as a warning as to what was to come, “Come, Chanyeol, let’s finish this,”

 

It all happened so quickly that Chan could barely comprehend. Chanyeol barreled toward him, kicking at his legs and causing him to fall to his knees. “Fall to my knees, dirty blood,” Chanyeol spat, but when he was suddenly knocked to the side by a large branch of a tree, he let out a grunt and turned his head sharply to see Minho holding his staff and levitating a large boulder above his palms.

  
“Enough!” The ground rumbled beneath him, but the demon didn’t stop. Chan’s eyes widened in alarm as Minho’s charm speak _was supposed to work_. Chan cursed mentally in his head and shot Seungmin a fatal look. Within that time span, Minho was back on the ground, the boulder set atop his stomach and just barely conscious of the world. Chan managed to scramble up in time for the first blow, catching the lightning bolt in his palms and whirling it back around to hit Chanyeol, but the demon dodged it with ease.

 

This went on for what felt like ages, the two summoning any and all elements at every moment they could until they couldn’t anymore. There wasn’t any more earth to throw, no more lighting to pull from the clouds, no more water, no more anything and Chan was growing weak. “God, you really are weak, aren’t you? Maybe you should have considered becoming a full god and leaving them behind after all, hm?” Chanyeol cackled but Chan paid him no mind.

 

“Are you sure about that?” Chan groaned, shooting another ball of light his way but Chanyeol rolled onto the ground and toward Chan, summoning a dark staff consumed by the mist and striking Chan with it so harshly, Chan landed on his hands and knees.

 

“I said fall to my knees!”

 

Chan couldn’t fight anymore.

 

“Go, little lion,” Chan rasped, sending Seungmin a look, but the mortal was entirely caught off guard.

 

However, it took a singular blow to the chest to get Seungmin to snap out of it, a glow beginning to fill his eyes that reminded Chan of his mother, and obviously, it scared the demon to an extent. A staff, similar to the one Chanyeol was carrying but made of light instead was summoned into his hand and Seungmin began to back the demon to the edge of the cliff side, the volcano lava bubbling beneath them. If Seungmin simply jutted his staff forward, Chanyeol would go flying into the cavern beneath but Seungmin hesitated, tears rolling down his cheeks. _He was scared_.

 

 _“Weep Little Lion Man, you’re not as brave as you were at the start,”_ Chanyeol cackled, watching Seungmin’s tears fall at a rapid rate, the staff separating him and the vessel stood on the edge trembling. Seungmin’s eyes flickered over toward Chan and Minho who were on the ground, panting heavily and holding their wounds with whimpers and expressions of pure pain on their faces. Seungmin needed to do this.

 

“I’m so sorry,” Seungmin croaked, locking eyes with Minho, and it took the elder a split second to realize what Seungmin was apologizing for and reached out to stop him with wide eyes. But it was too late. Seungmin dropped the spear and barreled towards the vessel with open arms and only the intentions of finishing this once and for all. Seungmin’s arms wrapped around Chanyeol as their chest smashed together and they went tumbling into the open, rumbling lava below and Minho let out a loud, screeching,

 

“No!”

 

That was the last thing Seungmin heard before the intense heat engulfed him and his poor, poor body hit the lava at the bottom.

 

“Minho! No!” Chan screamed, summoning a crystal wall in front of Minho to keep him from jumping off after him in hopes of blindly saving him. Chan knew better. God, Chan knew better and it still hurt. “He’s gone, Minho,” Chan wailed, and Minho fell to the ground with sobs wracking his bones. When the ground began to rumble beneath them, Chan darted toward Minho, holding him close on the ground as a crystallized, protected bubble appeared around them, and the way the flying, molten lava ran over the edges of the bubble after multiple explosions would haunt Chan for the rest of his days.

 

_“I’m so sorry. I’m so so sorry,”_

  
[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1138084051913457665?s=20)]


	11. TIMSHEL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “But I will tell the night  
> And whisper, "Lose your sight"  
> But I can't move the mountains for you”

**May 2017**

 

Heavy, merciless rain poured down on any and all the shoulders of the poor souls who hadn’t managed to take cover. It came down so thickly that drivers could just barely see through it and no doubt the rain gave an unsafe environment for just about everyone who exposed themselves to it. And if it couldn’t get any worse, lightning flashed and thunder rolled right above the head of Han Jisung. If Jisung couldn’t afford to lose so much time, perhaps speeding it up wouldn’t be such a bad idea but Jisung needed to get to safety before the cops caught up with him.  

 

He wasn’t sure what had pulled him to this moment. Well, he had a pretty good idea what it was but he wondered what the turning point had been. What brought them to this moment? What brought Jisung to the time that he kissed Changbin before he ditched town to now, where he was in the middle of fucking nowhere with rain soaking him from head to toe and making him vulnerable to sickness. Jisung wasn’t sure. All he knew was that his heart hadn’t calmed down despite hours passing, the moon high in the sky, and not a town within a twenty-five-mile radius. Sure, there was the occasional car that passed and Jisung always ended up escaping into the forest in case it was a cop but Jisung was ultimately alone and… he hated it.

 

The loneliness affected Jisung for 12 years of his life until he met Seo Changbin, and now that the feelings they had for one another were very much out there, Jisung couldn’t handle the thought of not having him, or anyone else for that matter, around. Jisung adapted to the social life and now, ripped right out from underneath his feet, Jisung couldn’t go back.

 

But he wouldn’t have time to think about it too much, as when he heard the sound of sirens, Jisung’s brain turned off from all the emotional turmoil and switched back to the need to survive. Jisung’s feet took him right into the dark of the forest where there were most definitely animals that could eat him and he couldn’t see through the darkness that went on for miles. On an even worse note, Jisung couldn’t stop running, so his poor skin began to split and form bleeding crevices due to the branches snapping all around him but his feet never stopped kicking.

 

Jisung could no longer hear the sirens, and yet he didn’t stop running deeper and deeper into the forest until he tripped over a log and fell face first into the mud surrounding the forest floor. Jisung didn’t get up. He didn’t have the energy. So, he simply laid there, curling up in on his shivering body and praying for a miracle to come and save him. Only then did Jisung realize that there wasn’t a siren within hearing range and that served to be a relief if he couldn’t find anything else.

 

There was no hard telling how long Jisung laid there for, but eventually, he heard the sound of someone singing beautifully. It was a woman, and her voice echoed off of the trees in a rather haunting manner, but at the very least it got Jisung to lift his head up and work toward actually standing up as well. Jisung’s arms wobbled underneath his weight, but all his thoughts flew out the window when he saw a fog make its way up on the floor of the dark forest and Jisung froze. _What the fuck?_  Now, Jisung’s fear masked his curiosity and it didn’t take long for Jisung to scramble up and run through the forest, but it seemed that no matter what direction he went in, the voice only got louder and louder and Jisung felt like he was losing his mind.

 

“I don’t- What’s going on?” Jisung wailed suddenly, so loudly that the singing stopped completely and Jisung was left standing in the middle of a small clearing with rain falling onto him from the sky above. Jisung fell down to his knees, tears threatening to escape his eyes from just the overwhelming emotions he faced. It seemed the owner of the voice came out from her hiding spot, and out of the corner of Jisung’s eye, he caught a foggy river through the trees with figures dancing along with it in Victorian clothing and smiles that demonstrated just how happy and ecstatic they were to be there. “What?” Jisung croaked, and all the fear that he felt before became masked by the original curiosity Jisung felt earlier and it seemed as though a spell had taken over him and controlled every nerve in his body.

 

With unstable footsteps, Jisung approached the river and slipped through the trees unnoticed. It was only when he reached the edge of the river and began to reach out that one of the dancers noticed and shook their head. They stayed closed, a man and a woman who looked similar, as if they were siblings, but not close enough for Jisung to reach out and touch them.

 

Jisung didn’t understand why these… transparent figures refused to allow Jisung to touch them but he wondered if it would end up hurting him immensely if he did. Jisung simply sat down on the muddy ground and watched them, but when they made their way down the river, new couples would come along and Jisung felt like crying when he saw how at peace they were and how it made him feel at peace as well, even if the rain pouring down on his shoulders never let up. Suddenly, food began to get thrown and their laughs rang out through the forest in the form of faster-paced water, but then the brother and sister were back, and one of the rolls from their pockets went flying outside the river and behind Jisung.

 

It was as if the roll was the cue for Jisung to get some sleep as the transparent food item landed in a small cave that would give Jisung just enough cover for the night. So, with wobbled legs, the younger stumbled over toward the cave and flopped down underneath the rocky cover, content with the feeling of no longer suffering through the pelting of heavy water droplets. Jisung’s skin was already starting to get numb, but a warmth flashed over him suddenly, enough to have him curling in on himself and closing his eyes to finally squeeze out the last remaining of his tears.

 

Jisung wasn’t sure what was going on anymore. Everything felt so… useless at the time. Jisung didn’t know what his purpose was anymore because Eric was dead, his grandfather was dead, Changbin is gone, and now Jisung was sleeping in a cave where he would no doubt die in his sleep from hypothermia. But nothing mattered anymore. Jisung could do nothing but trace the symbols on his hands absentmindedly as tears tracked down his already wet cheeks and gave him one other thing to worry about later. Jisung had no idea what to do, but he figured he could at least find out in the morning when he wouldn’t be soaked to the absolute brim.

 

God, this mud on his face felt absolutely disgusting, and if Jisung didn’t know any better, he probably would have just flopped down in that river and flowed along back with the dancers. Even if it meant dying.

  
Jisung fell asleep crying his eyes out to the sound of dying music and the heavy pitter patter of rain.

 

He’d deal with that mess in the morning.

  
  


Except, when he opened his eyes, a loud scream rung out through the forest and Jisung flung himself back against the rock wall behind him. Jisung didn’t sleep very well, and realistically, he was a light sleeper in the long run, but he never heard the crunching of leaves and he surely didn’t feel the presence of this man hovering over him, “Who the fuck are you?!” Jisung screeched, taking a good look at the man in front of him. He had curly bleached hair and bright silver eyes, and Jisung bristled when he realized he was wearing the same clothes the strange figure Jisung had come across before but didn’t want to ask it outwardly and be mistaken for a crazed man. At that moment, Jisung stopped time completely. The animals in the trees stopped squawking and the leaves stopped moving. The only thing that was coherent in this state was Jisung and the man staring at him frozen. “It’s you…”

 

“Jisung…” The figure trailed off, reaching his hands out and Jisung flinched at how normal, and warm, and calm his voice sounded. It was as if this man was the living embodiment of comfort. Jisung eyed the markings on his hands wearily, “Come on. Let’s get you somewhere warm,” but reached out anyway. Except, his body was so weak from the miles and miles and miles he walked and ran yesterday that his body gave out as soon as his feet were flat on the ground. “Shit. Okay. I’ve got you,” The figure hushed, curling his arms around Jisung as he gently lowered him back onto the ground into a position where the man could hook his arms under Jisung’s back and his knees. Jisung didn’t like to be babied like this, but his legs ached from both the acid in his muscles and from the cold keeping it there.

 

The rain disappeared not long before the sun rose a few hours beforehand, and now the bright, flaming ball of fire allowed rays to shine through the trees and create a rather beautiful atmosphere to the once dark and unexplainable forest Jisung had to endure the night before. “Am I dreaming? What the fuck is going on?” Jisung questioned, sounding both vulnerable and so scared he became angry about it. The figure glanced down at him for a moment, swiping his thumb along Jisung’s side to comfort him but the action only made Jisung more uneasy.

 

“I’ll explain once we get you a shower and some food in you,” The figure promised, but Jisung only began to squirm more.

 

“Let me go!” Jisung screeched. This figure, whoever he was, may have done some stuff for him in the past but Jisung couldn’t trust anyone anymore. He had to be on his guard and the fact that he woke up to this man hovering over him made everything so much worse. Unfortunately, his squirming only seemed to piss the man off and the blond held Jisung with an iron-like grip as his voice boomed and echoed through the forest so loudly that everything silenced around them and Jisung fell slack in his own body.

 

“Enough, Jisung!” The poor boy gulped and nodded, glancing away from the man’s now pure white eyes and twiddling his thumbs. After that, it was silent, Jisung too scared to say anything more and the man sensed this prompting him to offer the younger a sigh. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you,” The man apologized, nibbling on his lower lip and Jisung coughed quietly while looking down at his trembling hands.

 

“It’s okay. I’m just…” Jisung trailed off, not even able to find the words he could use to describe how he felt at the moment.

  
“Overwhelmed?”

 

“Yeah.” The figure laughed lowly in acknowledgment.

 

“I get it. It’ll get better though. I promise.” The figure promised, and then Jisung was looking ahead, squinting a bit before widening his eyes in acknowledgment when he saw a large courthouse in the distance and Jisung furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. Jisung doesn’t remember seeing that last night. Though, to be fair, Jisung couldn’t really see through the rain in the first place. The yard surrounding the courtyard was filled with bushes of flowers and plants Jisung didn’t recognize and they all glowed in a way that told him these weren’t normal day to day plants that he’d see anywhere else. But if he thought that was the end of all the weird objects, he was wrong by a mile as once he entered the courthouse, he was met with a rather peculiar place.

 

The courthouse was set up as more of a community home center than what it had been in its previous use, except there were rather weird things scattered around the place. It had a naturally warm, but dark glow to it that gave off this essence of coziness, but Jisung was more intrigued by the items floating in midair or the weird spheres that hum blankly. Jisung wanted to reach out and touch things so bad but every time the man saw him reach out, he moved him away so he couldn’t. “I want to touch them!”

 

“You can look at them, but no touching. Not until I tell you what they do and what they can cause,” The man huffed before they reached a long corridor with a multitude of doors scattered throughout with tables with even more objects and an array of plants between each one. “You can pick just about any of these rooms, but I have a feeling you’ll enjoy this one,” The stranger hummed, suddenly stopping in front of a door toward the end of the hall and motioning for Jisung to open it. Jisung frowned in question but didn’t hesitate to open it, gasping when he saw a rather grand room. Light beamed through the old, antique windows on the opposite wall, and Jisung grinned from ear to ear when he saw a small garden of flowers just outside providing a pretty view that didn’t make Jisung feel as though he was living underground. Jisung dreamed of the day he’d finally live in a nice room with a door and a window. It became rather overwhelming.

 

Jisung couldn’t even stare at the mattress on the ground in disdain purely because of the size of it and the objects on top. Fuzzy, black and white blankets covered the mattress of a much larger size along with a few pillows looking just right for hugging. “I love it,” Jisung breathed, reaching out for the stranger to let him down but the elder, silver-eyed man just tutted and worked his way to the door attached, swinging it open to reveal a bathroom. “You get water all the way out here?” Jisung questioned in confusion but the stranger just grinned.

 

“I’ll explain all in due time. There are towels underneath the sink, so why don’t you take a long bath while I make food, hm? I’ll bring you some clothes as well,” With that, the stranger set Jisung down so he stood on his own two, very wobbly legs and could at the very least lean against the counter of the sink. “Do you need any help?” Jisung flushed at that, waving him off with a labored gasp.

 

“I’ll be fine,” Jisung choked out, going to grip at the brim of his shirt but the figure watched him in worry. In fact, the worrying kind of terrified Jisung to an extent so he shooed him out of the bathroom, “Go. I’ll be fine,” Jisung promised, and that seemed to do the trick of getting the stranger to leave Jisung to do his own bidding. However, when Jisung heard the bedroom door shut, Jisung’s shoulders trembled and if Jisung hadn’t cried all of his tears last night, he’d definitely be sobbing his ass off at the time. Instead, he allowed himself to tremble for a minute and a half before he stripped himself of his clothes and turned the water on to watch the bathtub slowly fill up. Jisung couldn’t stop watching the glimmering water that practically sparkled and swirled with a metallic glint that faintly smelled of lavender and now Jisung had even more questions.

 

Once the water reached the desired height, Jisung carefully turned the faucet off and climbed into the hot water, letting his sore muscles relax. There was no hard telling how long Jisung lied in that tub for until he snapped out of it began to wash all the mud and blood away from his abused body and once the water was a rather ugly brown mixed with red, Jisung climbed out with a snarl. With that, his brain jumped right back into gear and Jisung didn’t hesitate to bend down and grab a fluffy towel from under the sink and dry his body off. With hesitant, careful footsteps, Jisung opened the door and much to his relief the man wasn’t anywhere in the room and the only sign of him ever being there was the pile of clothes sitting on the bed.

 

Jisung, despite wanting to be quick, was unbearably slow as he slipped the black sweatpants and grey t-shirt on along with a pair of boxers too big for him and socks covered in blue polka dots. Jisung didn’t complain about the socks as they were rather cute and as fuzzy as the blankets on the bed in the inside. “Hyung?” Jisung called out wearily when he opened the door and walked down the hallway, already getting lost. He had a pretty good idea on where to go but he didn’t want to risk being wrong and possibly getting even more lost and breaking something on accident. Much to his relief, he heard footsteps trailing down the hallway on the other side of the courtroom and the stranger peeped his head through the now open door.

 

“Come on. I just finished making breakfast,” The stranger coaxed, taking Jisung by the shoulder and letting the younger lean into him. Jisung could walk better now, not nearly as unstable as he used to be but he felt better leaning into the figures warmth and having a stable thing to lean on then to have the cold and the unending loneliness Jisung felt the night before. Jisung worked to make his life easy, not hard.

 

Much to Jisung’s delight, he was met with a rather big breakfast filled with things that Jisung had always wanted to try but never really had the chance. Due to the little money Jisung and his grandfather were able to make, Jisung lived off of eggs and rice every morning which realistically, wasn’t god awful, but this man had made a whole meal just for him consisting of a fried egg laying on top of a singular pancake, a bowl of rice, and what looked like some sort of breakfast soup on top. “This looks and smells amazing,” Jisung groaned in infatuation, licking his lips in preparation.

 

“I’m glad. Food will never be an issue here, so now you can get full, healthy meals,” The stranger grinned, but Jisung stared at him wearily. He didn’t want this man to think his grandfather was a bad person.

 

“You know that wasn’t my granddad’s fault… right?” Jisung murmured in an insecure manner and the stranger’s eyes softened considerably and when Jisung saw that… he realized. He realized that this man wasn’t just the faceless, hooded figure that showed up frequently when Jisung was stuck in his own little realm and in Changbin’s dreams but the one Jisung saw on the beach the day of Eric’s funeral and Jisung gripped his chopsticks lightly.

 

“Yes… Yes, I know. I knew your granddad quite well… I’m sorry for your loss,” Jisung gulped, watching the elder eat slowly with shiny eyes.

 

“He sent me here. He said I needed to come and find you,” The figure stopped eating for a moment, “Why?” sighing and setting the chopsticks in his hands, the man sat back and rubbed at the back of his head.

 

“I used to train him. I guess he wants me to train you too,” Silence fell over them after that, Jisung studying the figure in pure shock. How old was this man? How long had this man been around? _How strong was he?_ Thoughts flew around Jisung’s brain at a rapid pace, not quite sure where to stick in terms of ideas except for the dark, black hole like tattoos over the tops of the elder’s hands that linked with just how powerful he had been. Jisung desperately wanted to see the rest of the elder’s body and let the markings there tell Jisung just how powerful this man was. “Eat your food. Aren’t you hungry?” The man’s tone faintly reminded Jisung of a scolding mother and that alone had Jisung flushing and stuffing the food into his mouth without any further questions.

 

Well.

 

Until Jisung finished.

 

“What is your name?” The figure hesitated for a moment, still eating as he didn’t inhale his food like Jisung did, but once he finished his bowl of rice, the man set his chopsticks down across the top and leaned back into his chair.

 

“My name is Bang Chan. You woke up in the surrounding forest after, what I assumed, letting the river dancers drag you to the safe zone,” Chan explained with a quiet, but still confident tone that almost prompted Jisung to bristle.

 

“Safe zone?” Jisung stammered, head cocking to the side and his already twitching hands seemed to shake a little more on top of the table. However, before he could slip them back where Chan couldn’t see them, the elder took them into his own and rubbed his thumbs into his knuckles soothingly.

 

“You’re safe, Jisung. No one can get to you here,” Chan hushed, “The government officials lost track of you miles back and they’re probably hundreds of miles away in search of you. You are safe. _You are home,_ ” Jisung wasn’t too sure why the last statement got to him so much, but by the end of it, Jisung ripped his hands out of Chan’s and stood up with shaking, weeping limbs.

 

“I don’t have a home,” In Jisung’s head, it came out as cold and uninviting and the end result should end with Chan holding a rather hurtful expression on his face but in reality, it came out thick and vulnerable and only made Chan more concerned and worried than he already was, to begin with.

 

Jisung stumbled out of the room and down the hallways where he thinks his room was, “Jisung…” Chan called out to him but it only fell onto deaf ears, Jisung’s far too consumed with the voices whispering all around him to truly hear Chan, or anything else for that matter. Oddly enough, the voices didn’t seem to come from inside Jisung’s head, but instead flew around it, coming from everywhere all around him. They said awful things not only about him but about the ones he cared about, about Eric, about Changbin, about his grandfather. They belittled and tore Jisung to shreds from the sharpness and punctures of their words and Jisung slammed his shoulder into a door to force it open without much thought, not even really able to sense any part of his surroundings.

 

The poor boy’s senses soon sang in relief when his body tumbled over and he hit a soft bed that reeked of nice smelling cologne and mint that cleared the thick fog in his mind. Jisung buried his nose into the pillow underneath him without so much as another thought, hugging it tightly to his chest and rolling over so the whole of his front was buried into the mattress. There, in this room that Jisung didn’t have the energy to study, allowed Jisung to properly think and all he _could_ think about was Changbin. “I wish you were here, Hyung…” Changbin knew what to do when Jisung fell into another one of his own little fits and knew how to drag Jisung back out of it too, but now Jisung was alone.

 

Well… not quite alone, but he wasn’t even sure if that was enough.

 

Jisung would have to make it enough for the time being. At least until it was safe to find Changbin again. He’d always go back to Changbin.

 

Always.

  
  


The world rattled around him, Jisung just barely noticing it in his partially unconscious and sleep induced state. However, his body reacted to the warmth swaddling him before his mind did and Jisung’s arms slithered up a firm surface before twining around something at the top of it, long and thin, and grumbling to himself. “Too much movement,” The low laughter of Chan rung out but Jisung still hadn’t completely processed it. Jisung’s sleep induced state was as dangerous as it was adorable.

 

“Well, maybe you shouldn’t have fallen asleep in my bed. Then I wouldn’t have to be carrying you,” Chan teased smartly, lips tugging into a fond grin that Jisung could practically feel through his words.

 

“Sue me,” Jisung grumbled half hazard, playing absentmindedly with the hair on the back of Chan’s neck, prompting the elder to purr. Jisung will never understand why that snapped him back into consciousness but it did and Jisung felt his body tense up before squirming away from him and trying his absolute best to get out of Chan’s arms. The elder panicked at this, holding onto Jisung tightly and glaring down at him before just throwing him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

 

“No. We’re not doing this again, Jisung,” Chan hissed, silver eyes flashing into a blank, pale white and Jisung yelped in fear.

 

“What the fuck?” Jisung held onto Chan’s collar tightly to keep himself from falling but there was no way Jisung could keep his face anywhere near Chan’s so leaned back in slight horror. “What the fuck are you?” Jisung yelped one more time, trying to squirm his way out of Chan’s grip, even going as far as to slip into his own realm for a few seconds but realized that that was a mistake as it didn’t affect the elder.

 

But it sure as hell affected Jisung. “Shit!” Chan cursed when they snapped back into reality after five seconds and Jisung slumped back against Chan’s chest, blood dripping down his nose. Everything was escalating so quickly. “God, kid, when will you learn?” Chan hushed tilting Jisung’s head up so the blood didn’t drip down his shirt anymore. Jisung didn’t answer him, knocked out cold. Jisung’s body was weaker than the poor boy’s mind, stuck in this internal loop of wanting to be strong and stand up to all those around him but Chan knew better. Jisung needed to rest before things got worse. It was only a matter of time before the shit hit the fan and Jisung needed to be prepared for it. “What am I gonna do with you?”

 

Chan slowly lowered Jisung down onto the mattress in the corner of the room Jisung chose earlier, sweeping the bangs away from the younger’s forehead and feathering a kiss there. With careful movement, Chan backed away, swiveling around on his heel and trailed into the attached bathroom in search of a first aid kit. However, when Chan’s fingers grazed over the red satchel and moved back into the bedroom, Jisung’s eyes were open, but still hooded, and his fingers twitched on top of the mattress. “I feel like I’ve been asking too many questions,” Jisung’s voice cracked, eyes flickering back up to the ceiling. Chan didn’t respond right away, sitting down on the edge of the bed with a damp cloth to wipe away the dried blood on Jisung’s face.

 

Silence draped back over them as Chan cleaned Jisung up, the younger feeling heavy physically, too heavy to move and his eyelids were starting to feel the same way. It seemed his body was finally giving out on him after the complete shit show that had been his life for the last two days. “It’s okay to ask a lot of questions… I know it’s been rough,” Chan hushed, taking one of the blankets at the edge of the bed and laying it over Jisung, even going as far as to tuck him in. “Though… Your fight or flight instinct seems to kick in every time you get an answer,” Chan teased, earning crimson cheeks from the younger, “I’m not going to hurt you. I never will. You’re safe here, Jisung.”

  
“I know…” Jisung trailed off with a pout that resembled that of a child, even going as far as to bury his body further into the mattress and turn over so he was laying on his side and facing Chan. “I have so many questions,” Jisung mused breathily, voice barely even above a whisper but yet it was obvious Jisung was pretty drained and serious about it. It was that empty amusement Chan vaguely remembers seeing when Jisung lost Eric. Chan’s palm landed on Jisung’s thigh and patted it lightly.

 

“And you can ask as many as you want,” Chan promised, grunting a bit when Jisung grabbed his head and tugged him a little for Chan to make himself comfortable. The elder climbed over Jisung and sat up against the wall, legs cross and hands in his lap as he watched Jisung roll over and take a pillow to hug it close to his chest. “Go ahead. Before you fall asleep and I have to move again.”

 

“I don’t know where to start,” Jisung frowned, wracking his brain a little bit, “What’s your power?” Chan cocked his head to the side in interest, not really expecting that to be the first question but not as surprised as he probably should have been.

 

“I can do a lot of things,” Jisung peeked up in interest at that, settling himself and peering up at Chan with wide, innocent eyes that made Chan’s knees weak. “But mainly, I can evaporate into tiny little separated particles and move on my own accord without being seen. Think of it as invisibility but a little more complicated,” Chan explained with a shrug.

 

“Can I see?” Jisung gasped when Chan suddenly disappeared from his spot on the bed, whirling around to see him in the doorway. And then he was gone with a flash again and now laid down alongside Jisung on the bed. “Woah… What else can you do?” Jisung practically vibrated with curiosity but Chan just laughed and shook his head.

 

“I’ll show you another day when we can walk around the forest. Ask me something else,” Chan nudged him a bit and Jisung groaned, staring up at the ceiling in thought.

 

“How do you get water? And why is it glittery?” It came across as a very childlike question, and it really didn’t help that Jisung began to trace small shapes on the blanket draped across him and flowing back onto the bed as he glanced down at the fuzzy fur in fascination. Chan would soon understand and learn that when Jisung was tired and vulnerable, his stone wall came crashing down and revealed the small child within that never really got to show himself, to begin with. It was endearing to see, but entirely saddening to think about.

 

“I have a water system underneath the courthouse that flows in from the river. Those who used to live here perfected the system and enchanted the water so it gave us special buffs, hence why it's glittery,” Chan explained with a sorrow grin, and it only made Jisung peek up more in interest, even shifting so his temple rested on Chan’s knee before the younger grabbed for Chan’s hand gently and placed it on his head for the elder to run his fingers through Jisung’s hair. “What if I didn’t want to run my fingers through your hair, kid?” Chan teased with his tongue slightly poking out between his lips and shaking the knee Jisung laid on a bit.

 

“You don’t have a choice in the matter, I’m afraid,” Jisung snickered, purring like a cat and nuzzling into Chan’s body a bit more when the elder finally gave in and began massaging the younger’s scalp. “You said those who used to live here… there was a town here?” Jisung didn’t really believe that there was a town anywhere nearby for at least a few decades based on the dense forest around them but Chan hummed and nodded his head anyway.

 

“There was a whole one that stretched for miles. It was filled with people like us…” Chan trailed off, scratching at his nose a bit, “but shit hit the fan and… everyone either died or left. I made the forest grow again and now I’m the only one left. Those who drive by don’t know we even exist. I have a field around us that keeps us protected from the naked eye,” Chan murmured, his fingers slowing to a halt and Jisung couldn’t help but match his solemn expression.

 

“I’m sorry everyone left,” Jisung whispered, patting the elder’s other knee gently and letting his hands rest there afterward. It was quiet for a moment, so silent you could hear a pin drop and Jisung’s ears began ringing but Chan broke it with a quiet, breathy laugh that made Jisung’s stomach churn.

 

“It’s not your fault,” Chan dismissed with a wave of his hand before he went back to raking his hands through Jisung’s hair in a much more aggressive manner than before, “Besides, I’m not alone anymore am I? At least for a few more moments,” The two stared at one another, Jisung’s eyes locked on Chan’s quivering, glassy ones and he couldn’t help but sit up and take Chan’s hands into his own, holding them with a firm, safe grip that told Chan that yes, he was no longer alone. Chan appreciated that greatly.

 

That small moment they had for a few seconds is what seemingly solidified a stable start to a long lasting relationship between them as Jisung promised himself he’d never leave Chan. There was no hard telling how long Chan had felt alone for.

 

“Why don’t you tell me about yourself, hm?” Chan coaxed, moving his body so he was laying down and Jisung shifted, curling his body into a semi-circle and resting his head on Chan’s thigh as he held the edges of the furry blanket tight in his grip.

 

“I feel like you already know everything...” Jisung trailed off in suspicion but Chan snorted and rolled his eyes.

 

“I know very little actually. I don’t have time to watch you all day, you know?”

 

“Why? ‘Cause you’re watching Changbin?” Chan groaned loudly in dismay, thumping Jisung half-assed in the middle of the forehead and earning a yelp from the younger as a reaction. “Ow! Fuck, that hurt, hyung!” Jisung whined, rubbing at his forehead as he glared up at Chan with a pout.

 

“What? Do I need to kiss it better?” Chan teased.

 

“Come anywhere near my face and you die,” Jisung growled, but it seemed that Chan only used that as some sort of challenge as he moved quickly within a single flash, pinning Jisung down to the mattress and hovering over his face so Chan’s silver eyes bored down into Jisung’s deep, dark ones.

 

“I’m not dead yet, Jisung,” Chan hummed, moving his hands up so they were on either side of Jisung’s head on the mattress and Jisung gulped at the close proximity. If Chan decided to knock his head down an inch further, their noses would bump together painfully and Jisung felt his muscles tense up as Chan’s pupils shifted from small to large, much like if a cat were studying their human.

 

“You look like a cat,” Jisung stammered out without another thought and Chan snorted loudly, shaking his head but never moving. Neither one of them were sure how much time passed between them during that moment, but it felt like Jisung had slipped back into his own little realm to make sure it went a little slower. Jisung could already feel his heart speeding up at the thought of anything they might do after this.

 

Jisung hated how quickly he would like someone. It was like a fucking curse, especially since he was still with Changbin.

 

Changbin...

 

“What are you thinking about?”

 

“Changbin,” Jisung answered with an empty tone and even emptier eyes. Chan studied Jisung for a moment, shifting his body so his thumbs brushed against the side of Jisung’s cheeks, twiddling the limb lightly in hopes of providing some comfort to the boy’s nerves.

 

“Would it make you feel better if I told you he’ll be joining us at some point within the next few years?” Chan didn’t know what he was expecting, but it surely wasn’t for Jisung to twine his arms around Chan’s middle and bring him down to the mattress so they were laying side by side and their arms were shoved together.

 

“Just a little,” Jisung croaked, squeezing the blanket a little tighter in his small fists.

 

“It’ll be okay, Jisung,”

 

“I’ll take your word for it,” Jisung hushed, burying his face into the side of his pillow and letting his eyes flutter closed. Even after Jisung fell asleep, Chan stayed right there, tracing small shapes into the side of Jisung’s hip with his pointer finger middle knuckle, not even thinking about stopping when Jisung moved in his sleep to press his forehead against Chan’s shoulder. Jisung, bless his poor heart, was oblivious to the way he made Chan feel. Jisung did wonders for Chan, more than either one of them realized, but Chan wouldn’t feel complete until much later.

 

He was okay with that though. Time was important, and he needed to be patient.

  


A month and two weeks pass before Jisung is fully recovered from the night of horrors. Physically, he was pretty okay, but his fight or flight instincts still kicked in pretty often around Chan and the elder was slowly but surely learning how to deal with it. It proved to be difficult, yes, but Chan was always up for a challenge and he just wanted Jisung to be okay and stable and happy, even if the last one was a bit of a stretch. “Good morning, Jisung,” Chan greeted when the younger came waltzing out into the yard behind the courthouse and sat down on the steps. The boy let out a loud, long yawn and waved his hand weakly toward the elder. Chan just watched him with a fond, endeared grin. “You ready to train today?” He called out, picking some tomatoes from the plants he tended to along with some peppers and squash as well.

 

“You’re asking me if I’m ready to get physical. Try again,” Jisung sassed, yawning again, but cutting himself off with a guttural whine when Chan suddenly appeared beside him, holding a basket of produce in one hand and using the other to ruffle the younger’s hair. “You’re so lucky I hadn’t brushed my hair yet!” Jisung shrieked, voice cracking the lack of use that morning. Jisung tried his best to ignore the way his heart stammered a bit when he heard Chan laugh loudly from the kitchen.

 

“What are you going to do, Jisung? Your powers don’t work on me,” Chan taunted loudly, unsurprised when Jisung got up from the steps and stomped into the kitchen to argue a bit more.

 

“Yeah, because you’re like a god or something!” Jisung retorted, “it’s unfair!” Chan had gone eerily quiet at the mention of his god-like abilities, but Jisung’s brain didn’t really connect his silence to that specific comment. Sometimes, Chan just blanked out for a moment, so Jisung just simply believed this was one of those times. “Chan…?” Jisung trailed off carefully, going to dip his hand into the basket of unwashed baby tomatoes and munch on a few, but Chan’s hand suddenly flew up and smacked at his wrist.

 

“Yah! They haven’t been washed yet. What’s wrong with you?” Chan grouched, and pointed toward the pile of freshly washed produce, “take some of those, but not too many, I have to trade these in later.” Jisung didn’t hesitate to walk around Chan and grab a handful before sitting down at the island behind them both. “You’ll learn to be strong. It’ll just take time and dedication,” Chan murmured, moving on to cutting up some peppers to put into a stirfry that would cook while they trained. “You’ll have to hone in something you’re passionate about. Most people channel their anger for those not like them and the way they treated us differently, while others just wish to be powerful.”

 

Jisung listened intently, trying to think of ways he could hone in his ability to control what he did. Sure, Jisung could control his powers pretty well but he didn’t exactly know how to use them in an effective way that didn’t fuck him up so badly. He could only go so long in his little realm before he passed out and using it continuously drained him immensely. “I’m not sure if there’s anything direct I can hone in. I feel like using anger is dangerous.”

 

Chan pondered it for a moment, “it can be, but only for those who use it as the only gateway for releasing their anger. They go on killing sprees and make it much harder for us in the long run, but some of the most powerful people I know used anger to achieve their power.” Minho, for example, but Chan also knew he couldn’t necessarily talk about Minho directly. “I worked with a man once, and he used his anger to reel in his control, but he had to be one of the calmest people I knew. Even when we saw…” _Death_. “Even when we saw hardships, he kept calm.”

 

“Is he still alive?” Jisung dared to ask, not expecting a direct response, and Chan didn’t give him one either.

 

“I hope so.”

 

Silence draped over them, but it wasn’t necessarily suffocating. Chan went back to preparing a stirfry and Jisung tried his best to think of something that could help him. Chan must have heard him thinking too because he spoke up a few moments later.

 

“Some people use love as a control mechanism too,” Chan hushed softly, back to Jisung and eyes locked on the pepper resting on the cutting board and the knife in his hand. “I’ve known many people who use the love they have for family or partners to help them control themselves.”

 

“Does it work?” Jisung questioned, flushing a bit when he realized how dumb that question sounded alone, “Like, you know... efficiently?”

 

“It varied. Using emotions to control what you know isn’t exactly stable in every scenario. Emotions can act out, you can get too caught up and lose control,” Chan explained. Jisung frowned, running his fingers through his hair and holding his cheek in thought.

 

“Is there a way I can control it without using emotions as a foundation?” Chan stopped cutting, tensing his shoulders.

 

“There is… a way… but it’ll take years for it to be effective. It’s worth it but I’m not sure you have that kind of time.” Chan admitted, shoulders slumping the more he spoke, sliding the cut vegetables into the boiling water in the pot on the stove. “But it’s entirely up to you. If you wish to be introduced to it, then I will but it’s not a strong option because you can’t just speed it up. It’s a matter of your soul, not your will.” It didn’t make sense to Jisung in the long run. He’d never fully understand when your soul and will became separated but Chan was much wiser than Jisung originally thought so he wouldn’t argue with him about it now.

 

“I want to try it… Who knows, it might be of better help than either one of us realized…” Jisung murmured, shooting Chan a bright smile when he looked back toward him in shock. Maybe Chan misread him…

  
  


The leaves crunched underneath the souls of their shoes as they walked through the forest. Jisung wasn’t sure where Chan planned on taking him as the elder didn’t exactly answer him every time Jisung asked.  The younger didn’t mind too much. Chan had long since proven that he wouldn’t ever hurt Jisung so the younger held faith in the elder to not fuck this up majorly. It only helped that the forest came off a lot more peaceful when you weren’t running through it in the dead of night to make sure you stayed alive long enough to see the sunrise the next morning.

 

Eventually, thirty minutes later Jisung presumed, Chan stopped in the middle of a flower field and let his eyes droop closed. This flower field was Chan’s version of a summit, his little safe haven where he could escape into that realm where nothing mattered except simply existing amongst the rest of the elements. Jisung just watched him, finding the sight pleasant but mildly concerning as Chan just simply stopped existing as a being for a few moments. However, after a minute and a half, Chan turned back to face Jisung with nearly white eyes and a hand outstretched. “Come here,” Chan coaxed with a soft voice and Jisung gulped, but took Chan’s hand anyway.

 

The elder tugged him forward and trailed them toward the middle of the flower field, and that’s when Chan waved his hand and a large, perhaps the largest tree Jisung has ever seen, appeared in the middle of the field and Jisung gaped in shock. There were lit lanterns hanging from the branches that stretched so far and wide that they blocked the sun completely from where the two stood, swaying a bit due to the sudden influx of wind, and holy shit there was a pond circling the tree aside from the very front where a flat, almond-shaped rock sat in front of the log. “Holy shit…” Jisung whispered, circling around to really take in the tree.

  
“Go and sit on the rock,” Chan hushed, patting Jisung gently on the back so he’d get a move on. The younger practically sprinted over, jumping up onto it like a fucking rabbit and sitting crisscrossed with his back against the trunk. Chan began to speak as he approached, “There were legends for a very long time that if one learned to live amongst the elements instead of simply trying to overpower them and control them, you’d live in so much harmony with that part of yourself that it would become completely intertwined with you willingly. There’s a religious aspect to it all but… you don’t necessarily have to learn the religion to take part in this as it’s more of a soul bond than a godly bond,” Chan tried his best to explain in a way that made sense. He knew he was being vague with some of it, but it’s hard to explain such a practice without getting into the meaning behind it all.

 

“Would you mind teaching me some aspects of the religion?” Jisung cocked his head to the side, pouting a bit as he took Chan’s hands into his own and gave them a gentle squeeze. “This has just been my entire life, you know? I’ve had these markings for so long but I don’t know what any of it means. My grandfather never talked about the religious aspect of it all…”

 

Chan swung Jisung’s hands in comfort, offering the boy a reassuring soft smile as well. “Our religious meanings have skipped a few generations as time passed and we had to go into hiding. It’s hard to be open about our mother when we are executed and used for simply existing. Perhaps I’ll take you to some of the underground cities one day so you can see where we come from. There’s an entire world out there for us and I’d hate to see you not experience it at all,” Chan promised and Jisung felt much better.

 

“Thank you, hyung…”

 

Chan just smiled, his eyes flashing pure white for a moment when a strong breeze came through and brushed back his hair. “Now, sit back and relax, okay? This requires a lot of time and focus,” Chan ordered and Jisung let his eyes fall shut. “Focus on all the elements around you, okay? There’s fire above you, the wind blowing through your hair, the trickle of water as frogs splash in the pond, and the earth herself holding you upright.” Chan always had a way with words, but never had Jisung heard him speak so _flowery_. “Let nature take you into her grasp and coddle you. She’ll make you feel right at home. Relax and let yourself exist, Jisung.”

 

And then Chan was gone. Jisung was stuck sitting on the rock next to a tree he didn’t know even existed, and he felt frustrated. Jisung could feel and hear everything when Chan guided him for those few short moments, but now Jisung felt like he was just simply being a nuisance to the world around him. Jisung tried his best to just simply allow himself to exist, but the harder he tried, the more frustrated and hyper-aware he became.

 

Jisung isn’t sure how long he sat there, but he felt like he wasted so many hours before something actually started to set in. He didn’t know what it was, but it felt like something had clamped down on his shoulders in a comforting but still very firm manner. It was as if every time Jisung tried to give up, the wind would whisper in his ear for him to try again and Jisung would stay put until the thoughts showed up again. Jisung hadn’t even realized that he was slowly falling into the mindset and livelihood Chan needed him to.

 

Jisung became so intuned with his surroundings, so unbothered by nature and what it was doing around him that he didn’t even notice a sight Chan hadn’t seen in a very, very long time.

 

Chan had come back to check on the younger, approaching the edge of the flower field, but stopping abruptly when he saw Jisung floating in mid-air, and covered from head to toe in butterflies. But they weren’t just any butterflies… they were Gyuri’s. The last time Chan saw that was with Seungmin and Chan’s breath caught in his throat. “Mother…” Chan whispered out, and Jisung’s eyes snapped open, eyes glowing and brown irises replaced with opal ones. It seems the entirety of his eyes has turned into gems. Perhaps Jisung was stronger than Chan had realized.

 

Perhaps Jisung played a bigger role in all of this than _any_ of them had realized.

 

As quickly as the opal appeared, it disappeared and Jisung went falling back to the rock as the butterflies flew away only to disappear within the clouds and Chan dashed forward in hopes of catching him. Luckily for him, He managed to catch Jisung before the boy’s back made hard contact with the rock. “I am so sorry!” Chan nearly shrieked when Jisung stared up at him, eyes wide in amazement.

 

“What… What was that, Chan? I didn’t even realize I was floating or that I was covered in butterflies! What kind of butterflies even were those? I’ve never even seen them before,” Jisung whispered in fright, stumbling over his words as Chan slowly set him back down on the rock so the boy could be stable. Jisung practically curled in on himself in fear, and Chan tried his best to comfort him with soft kisses to his hands.

 

“You… You were chosen, I presume,” Chan breathed, reaching up to swipe a hand through Jisung’s hair.

 

“Chosen?”

 

“It’s a religious matter… I didn’t tell you about it because I wasn’t sure if you’re soul was quite so passionate enough for it but I was obviously wrong,” Chan murmured with a tiny, regretful smile. “This stuff is incredibly complicated, Jisung. The butterflies simply mean that the mother has given you an additional bonus. It means you’re powerful and far more in control then you realize and she’s recognized that…”

 

“Have you ever seen it before?” Jisung questioned softly, reaching out to play with Chan’s collar, rolling the fabric between his fingers to keep himself calm. _This was too much_.

 

“I have,” Chan nodded, studying Jisung’s expressions. The boy, after seeming to be so strong, so much older than he was for so long, that Jisung had finally allowed himself to fall into his innocence and be frightened by something.

 

“When?”

 

Chan’s eyes watered a little at the memory of Seungmin, thumb tracing over the apple of Jisung’s cheek in a way that more or so soothed Chan more than Jisung. “Over a thousand years ago…”

  
  
  


Chan kept his promise about letting Jisung see the underground society that their kind built up over the years. At first, Jisung was excited, nearly bouncing off the walls as Chan lead him down into the underground tunnels that no doubt ran all over the continent. Jisung was amazed by the lights if he were honest, but he was more excited about meeting more people like him. “Now, there are many ways to reach the communities, but I find the tunnels are the easiest way to do so without growing suspicion. It’s easier for all of us to navigate as well.”

 

“How on earth do you navigate, though? The tunnels go on for miles!” Jisung argued, pouting a bit in confusion as his hands flew around. Chan laughed a bit, taking one of Jisung’s hand to keep him from wandering off and calm.

 

“You see, the tunnel knows where you wish to go. The colors lead you to where you’re heading. It gets pretty easy after a while, but if you ever get lost, it’ll help you get home,” And as if on cue, they reach a four-way, and the purple colors along the walls only went off to the right. “See?” Jisung made small noises in shock, eyes as wide as can be and Chan felt his heart stumble a bit at the sight.

 

_Stop it, Chan. You can't be with them. You know that._

 

“It shouldn’t be much longer now,” Chan suddenly uttered, quite coldly if Jisung were honest, and dropped the younger’s hand from his own. Chan wouldn’t look him in the eye after that, but that didn’t mean Jisung was just going to let his only source of comfort go away.

 

“Hey now. Who said that hand holding was just about you?” Jisung snapped a bit and took Chan’s hand back into his own. Chan didn’t look at him, knowing fully that Jisung was studying his response, but Jisung didn’t miss the way his eyes remained wide and unblinking as he stared ahead. Jisung found the sight endearing, but then Changbin popped into Jisung’s head and the boy was left feeling very unsure, and even a little guilty. Jisung shoved those thoughts aside for now, he’s come back to them later when he had a clearer head.

 

Up ahead, Jisung saw a warm, orange light illuminating a small part of one side of the tunnel, and Jisung practically lit up right with it. “Here we are…” Chan trailed off, looking a bit uneasy when they approached a brown door with a slab of mosaic red, green, orange, and yellow glass in the middle of the upper portion of the wood. Jisung studies the glass for a moment, realizing it made out the same symbol everyone single one of them had on one of their palms. “When you go in, you’ll be approached by a man with an eyebrow piercing. His name is Bobby and when he asks for your ID, show him your palms. If he asks where you come from, say the 15th district. They’ll all be a little shocked at that but if they ask about me, just answer.” Jisung only stared at Chan in confusion.

 

“Are you not coming in?” Jisung murmured, looking far more anxious than he was before and Chan smiled sadly, shaking his head.

 

“I can’t. Not yet.” Chan’s voice cracked when he spoke and Jisung softened up considerably. The younger reached out, timidly running his fingertips along Chan’s, enough to tickle but not enough to physically define a presence. “Just go with the flow of the room. They’re nice and they’ll take you in so you’ll feel welcome. Feel free to ask questions as well, they’ll tell you pretty much everything you want to know about our kind,” Chan coughed, tucking his hands away into his pockets so Jisung was forced to let his hands fall limp at his sides.

 

“Alright, Hyung. Thank you for this.”

 

Chan simply shrugged, shooing him inside so they could carry on with their daily agendas.

 

The weird thing about the tunnel doors was that they were like portal entrances. You could see through them, see the other side as clear as day, but your general surroundings were separated from the one within the door. Jisung knew the club inside hustled and bustled with noise and smelled far different from the tunnels but all Jisung could hear was the silence of the tunnel and smell the strange mildew in the air. But as soon as Jisung stepped through, he heard the clinking of glasses and the hearty, booming laughter of the people sitting at tables playing cards and drinking games, and smelt cigars, rosemary, and old books. Jisung turned back toward the open door, seeing Chan peeking around the corner with a look in his eyes Jisung didn’t recognize.

 

“Come on, kid! Shut the door!” a rough voice called out, earning a jump from the younger as he whirled around. Chan was right, a man a few inches taller with an eyebrow piercing stood a foot away from Jisung with a glass in one hand and the other buried in his other pocket. Jisung gulped, turning around to practically slamming the door and Bobby winced a little when the glass rattled from the impact. Jisung went to go apologize but Bobby just held out his spare hand and waved him off. “Don’t worry about it… folks do it all the time,” Bobby muttered and Jisung nodded. “Now… ID?”

 

Jisung quickly held out his palms, letting the elder glance at them.

 

“Ah… A time weaver, huh? Haven’t met one of you in a while,” Bobby grinned wickedly and Jisung found himself relaxing slightly. Bobby was intimidating yes, but something about him reminded Jisung of his older brother so Jisung let his guard down just a tad. “Where are you from, time weaver?” Bobby took a sip from his glass and Jisung gaped in shock. Chan had gotten all of this down to an absolute T.

 

“District 15,” Jisung murmured, not even speaking that loudly in the long run, but the whole bar went dead quiet afterward. Every single one of them stared at Jisung in shock.

 

“That… That can’t be right. Are you sure you’ve got that right, kid?” Bobby questioned wearily, and Jisung huffed, crossing his arms over his chest defensively.

 

“Pretty sure. I live in a courthouse in the middle of nowhere with Bang Chan,” Jisung snapped, not liking the fact that these people undermined him in any way. He must have said it with it too much ferocity because even the biggest guy across the room flinched. Well, all aside from a man in the far back corner shuffling a deck of cards in the air with a cigar hanging between his teeth and sitting alone. He looked a bit bored but stared at Jisung with an intrigued gaze nonetheless. Jisung could tell from a mile away he was a very important man.

 

“No need to get so defensive, kid. Why don’t you grab a drink from our demon princess, Yeji over there and come join us?” An old man with a thick gray beard and mustache, equally gray hair swept back as he dealt out some cards. It looks like they were playing poker but not dealing with actual money. It was all simply bragging rights it seemed. Jisung glanced over to the bard lit up with warm, yellow lights and saw a girl with almond-shaped eyes and long but thin lips offering him a wicked smile. She was beautiful, but Jisung knew she was powerful if the tattoos going up her arms said anything at all. “Give him one of our regulars, doll. Something tells me this kid doesn’t have a lot of hair on his chest.”

 

“You got it, old man,” Yeji called out, pouring some brown liquid into and sliding it down the bar for Jisung to catch. He just barely managed to, catching it with a tiny shriek but Yeji giggled and shook her head as she wiped down the bar where she just made it.

 

“That’s rich, coming from you, you old hag!” The man laughed, and suddenly, a transparent, purple tinted knife appeared in her hand and she pointed it threateningly toward the man.

 

“Watch your tongue before it ends up in your next drink, Hyungsoon,” the girl threatened, laughs booming out through the bar. Jisung watched them with confusion etched deep in his features. There was no way Yeji could be older than this old man. Yeji looked about Chan’s age and the man looked ready to start walking with a cane in a few years time. Hyungsoon’s attention suddenly ended up on Jisung and he must have noticed his confusion and waved him over.

 

“You look like you have a lot of questions, so sit down and ask away,” The man offered and Jisung sat down slowly in the empty chair across from the man, two more on either side of them. “You wanna play?” The man held up the cards and Jisung just shook him off.

 

“I do my fair share of my own personal gambling. I don’t want to feed into any more than I have to.” Jisung murmured, and the man on his left snorted before nodding his head in understanding.

 

“I get that, kid,” The man gruffed out, looking skinny but toned in a way. He seemed to be the eldest of the bunch.

 

“So… is she older than you or…?” Jisung inquired timidly, and the men in front of him boomed with laughter.

 

“She may look pretty and youthful but she’s got centuries on almost everyone in this godforsaken place,” The man with a thick beard snickered.

 

“How does that even work?”

 

The men leaned back in their chairs, two of them looking toward the one on Jisung’s right. “It varies from person to person. It all depends on how much you pray to Gyuri and how much control you have over your soul. That little witch over there can do just about anything with hers.” Yeji only smiled, now pulling out two daggers from behind the bar and Jisung flinched back a bit.

 

“Gyuri?”

 

“You seriously don’t know anything, do you?” Jisung just shook his head. “Gyuri is everything. She’s our mother if you will. She looks after all of us, protects us, makes us strong, allows us a way to control all this flooding inside of us,” The man let fire dance across his fingertips for an example. It reminded Jisung of Changbin. “She gives, and gives, and gives. She’s truly our mother.”

 

“Some of us don’t take the practive as seriously though. With the way society is so demanding now a days we can barely set aside time for meditation anymore,” the eldest muttered bitterly, taking a swig from the glass in sitting on the table. “But that doesn’t mean we don’t believe in her… she’s our mother.” He gestured over to the painting on the wall in the back of the room, a woman looking like she was made of stars overlooking all of her children.

 

Having a mother sounded nice.

 

“What’s your name anyway?”

 

“Han Jisung,” Jisung bowed his head respectively and the three men exchanged a look.

 

“You don’t seem to know much about our kind,” The first man pointed out timidly. “Who was your father?”

 

Jisung shrugged. “Don’t know. Never met him. My grandfather raised me and he trained me for a little bit but he was never too open about all of this,” Jisung gestured to the room around him. “Chan had to tell me about that one.”

 

“Who was your grandfather?”

 

“Woohyun,” Jisung muttered and the men all sat back in shock.

 

“Shit, boy, I haven’t seen that man in years! He used to play cards with us all the time,” the eldest practically yelled and Jisung gaped at them in shock. Really? _His_ grandfather? “How’s he doing?”

  
Jisung glanced down, “Erm… he died a few months ago. The government got to us so I had to flee. He stayed to protect me,” Jisung whispered, a tear trailing down the edge of his nose and onto his lips, Jisung snapping his head down so his eyes were focused on his lap and they couldn’t see the tear.

 

Silence followed not long after.

 

“I’m sorry to hear that. He was a good man. We could hold a service for him if you’d like.”

 

Jisung glanced up with a smile. Jisung had never been in a community that treated him well, so this felt like a breath of fresh air. Jisung felt like he belonged for the first time in his life and… he loved it. He didn’t want to give it up. “I’d like that.”

 

Jisung still had questions, he still worried about a lot of things, but this was good enough for him for now.

  
  
  
  
  
[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1141382260878381056?s=20)]  



	12. THISTLES & WEEDS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "But plant your hope with good seeds
> 
> Don't cover yourself with thistle and weeds"

**November 2018**

 

It all made sense now. 

 

Everything that Chan did, everything Chan had made so much sense to them now that Jisung and Changbin felt like slapping themselves for being so ungodly stupid when it came down to knowing who this man was. Sure, they hadn’t been expecting a shaman that worked wonders, but now that the idea was put into their heads, _it made sense_. 

 

But god, there were still so many questions, so many concerns, and Changbin wasn’t even sure where to start, “So… this demon inside me-”

 

“He’s not inside you anymore. He’s probably off looking for another vessel,” Chan corrected quickly, pouring another bucket of ice into the bath Changbin was submerged in so he could cool off. Changbin rolled his eyes, still a little irritated by the whole ordeal. Everything about this situation was overwhelming to him and he had no idea where to start really. The anxiety of what Chan had heard back in the forest still eats away at his stomach. 

 

“ _Okay, so this demon_ ,” Changbin snapped, nose scrunched and eyebrows tugged together, “is trying to practically take over the universe so he can destroy the world but the universe is run by your mother and now I have to step up and do what you couldn’t?” The last part stung. Chan flickered his eyes to the ground in guilt for not taking care of the situation properly but Changbin didn’t mean to be so cruel about it. It just… it just sounded so insane! None of it made sense as much as it _did_ make sense. It was a hard pill to swallow. 

 

“Yes,” Chan croaked, “I know it’s a lot. _I know,_ ” At the sight of seeing Chan so distressed and distraught, Changbin had the strong urge to reach out and grab his wrist so he could calm the poor man down but that day’s earlier events still ate away at Changbin’s brain and confidence, and it didn’t help when Chan was a practical god. 

 

“Your mother is a god?” 

 

“Yeah,” 

 

“And your dad was a human?”

 

“Mhm,”

 

Every reply sounded weaker and weaker. 

 

“So you’re half a god?” Chan winced at that question, and Changbin knew it was a bit more complicated than that, “Explain,” 

 

“Haven’t I done a lot of explaining tonight?” Chan tried to worm his way out of it, even going as far as to stand up but Jisung was quick to grab his shoulder and force him back down into the chair they had brought into the bathroom so they could all talk. Chan landed back in his seat with a huff. “I have a choice. I can’t be half mortal half god forever, that’s not how it works. I’ll have to choose to be fully human or fully a god sooner or later. It’s only a matter of time,” Chan hushed, rubbing at his forehead for a moment. “I’ll probably end up striking a deal with my mother…” 

 

“Like?”

 

“Finish out this life as a human and then when I die, I become a full god and stand by her side,” Chan shrugged casually, placing his chin in the palm of his hand and Changbin and Jisung can’t do anything but stare at him. They weren’t sure why they were staring at him as they knew Chan was being serious but it was as if they still expected him to tell them that he was kidding and that everything he just said was a joke. “It’ll be okay. Can I go now?” Chan pleaded but Changbin’s eyes narrowed. 

 

“Stay right where you are,” Changbin ordered with a tone as cold as the ice he soaked in, “You told me that I would be strong enough that no one could control me again.” The words sent a chill down Chan’s spine from how low and _dark_ they sounded. Chan sighed and buried his head into his hands. He knows he told Changbin that because it’s true, but Changbin hasn’t reached that level of strength yet. He still needed to train! He could barely control the flames as it was. This felt like a disaster. 

 

“I didn’t say when. You’re not ready. You’re still not ready,” Chan looked like he was ready to cry, fingers slightly trembling from how tightly they tangled themselves in his own hair. Jisung sighed, reaching out to place his hands on top of Chan’s and slowly pull them away. 

 

“Channie? Channie, you need to breathe,” Jisung whispered, loosening Chan’s fingers from his hair to intertwined their hands and bring them down so they were around Chan’s neck. The elder relaxed a little, sniffling and red in the face as he let his glassy eyes roll into the back of his head for a moment. Changbin just stared with a warm and frightening heart as Jisung rested his cheek on top of Chan’s head to calm him down. 

 

“I know I told you that, Changbin. I just…” Chan stopped, gulping a bit and relaxing further into his chair almost as if he were curling into the physical shield Jisung created for him. “I knew something like this was going to happen but I didn’t think it’d be so soon and it’d be that demon. I thought I banished him _a thousand years ago_ . I thought I’d have enough time to train you, _both of you_ , but obviously, I was wrong.” Chan internally beat himself up over all of this and Changbin saw it from a mile away. Perhaps that’s why he reached out and placed both of his hands timidly on Chan’s knee. 

 

“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have snapped at you,” Changbin apologized but Chan quickly shook his head while ripping his hands from Jisung’s to lean forward and dip his warm hands into the water where Changbin’s rested, not caring if all his nerves froze up at the intensity of the icy temperatures. Changbin felt his heart skip a beat when Chan looked at him with such sincere remorse. 

 

“No, no, no, don’t apologize, okay? You went through a lot today. I can’t blame you for being angry and confused. I can’t imagine what that must have been like for you,” Chan’s eyes wobbled as he spoke, reaching a cold, dripping wet hand up to Changbin’s cheek and gently graze the fat there with his fingertips. Changbin, still burning up in both temperature and his internalized feelings for the elder, melted into his cold touch without much thought. “I’m sorry I put both of you through that. I should have been more honest. I should have told both of you what you were getting into.” 

 

“Chan, you didn’t have any idea what you were getting us into. You didn’t know he was alive, you said so yourself,” Jisung tutted, tapping against the back of his neck to grab his attention. Chan’s hand dropped from Changbin’s cheek, his other one still holding Changbin’s under the water as he reached the dryer one out to place on top of Jisung’s resting on his shoulder. “You’re a god as well. I can’t blame you for being hesitant to admit that…” Jisung laughed quietly, leaning down to nuzzle his nose into the top of Chan’s head. “Don’t blame yourself either. It’s a shitty situation for all of us.” Chan felt his heart stammer a bit when Jisung kissed his head discreetly. 

 

“Always the peacekeeper …” Changbin trailed off with a fond lilt to his tone and Jisung grinned from ear to ear, rounding Chan’s chair to lean down and kiss Changbin lightly on the lips. Changbin hummed happily against his lips, pulling him down for a little more and Jisung’s chest vibrated with laughter. Chan tried his best not to watch them out of respect but he wished… _He wished they’d kiss him too_. Chan let out a cough and they separated slowly, Changbin melting at the hand of his lover resting against his cheek. 

 

“We need to have a discussion later,” Jisung whispered against Changbin’s lips, peeling himself away to shoot the elder a knowing but still reassuringly fond look and Changbin let out a shaky breath, nodding slightly. “You think you need to stay in here any longer or are you ready to get out and changed?” Jisung questioned, and Chan choking on his spit when Jisung lowered himself down into his lap. Jisung did this a lot in the first few months of him being there, but he didn’t think Jisung would do it with Changbin there…

 

Changbin sighed and sunk down to completely submerge himself underneath the water. Jisung laughed a bit at the sight, sitting up from Chan’s lap after smacking his knees a bit. 

 

“Well then… I guess that means we should let him be alone for a bit,” Jisung murmured, taking Chan’s hand into his own and helping the elder up. They took the chair on their way out, leaving behind a towel and a fresh pair of clothes for the younger so he didn’t drip everywhere when he finally decided to get up. “Come on. You need to get some rest too,” Jisung coaxed and Chan sighed, slipping his hand into Jisung’s outstretched one and allowing the elder to lead him down to Chan’s bedroom. 

 

Chan’s room was actually quite large. He had a big bed that he rarely ever used as far as Jisung was aware, and bookshelves upon bookshelves of books in all different languages and little artifacts that were a little more precious to Chan. Plants covered most corners and the window sills littered through the room, and the warm light the fireballs hanging from the ceiling created a beautiful over glow for the red velvet blankets across Chan’s incredibly soft bed. Jisung’s pretty sure he’s slept more in that bed then Chan has in the last century if he were honest. But that didn’t matter. His bed was comfortable and Jisung would be damned if he didn’t use it when he could. 

 

“You mind if I stay here for a while?” Jisung murmured, lowering himself on the bed. 

 

“You know I don’t, Jisung,” Chan hushed, and Jisung grinned, falling backward and bouncing a bit from the plush underneath him. Chan dug through his drawers for a pair of comfortable clothes, pulling out a pair of sweatpants and a long sleeved shirt. “Close your eyes.” and Jisung did. He’s seen Chan’s tattoo’s once, and it was entirely on accident. The man absolutely hated showing them and was incredibly self-conscious about them for a reason Jisung didn’t know but didn’t question either. He didn’t want to make Chan uncomfortable, so he didn’t. “Alright, you can open your eyes,” Chan murmured, sitting on the foot of the bed to rest his feet on the wooden frame so he could rest his elbows on his knees and bury his face into his arms. 

 

“You okay?” Jisung questioned, trying his best not to corner Chan and startle him, but he just wanted Chan to open up to him and tell Jisung what’s on his mind. “You know you can talk to me right?” 

 

“Not about this…” Chan whispered quietly, head hanging low when Jisung slithered his arms around Chan’s neck from behind, holding him the same way he had earlier in the bathroom with his cheek squished against the top of his head. Chan breathed out deeply at the younger’s touch, leaning back into his chest when the sides of Jisung’s knees pressed against the corners of Chan’s hips. 

 

“Because you feel like you can’t or because it’s me and I wouldn’t understand?” Jisung wasn’t trying to guilt trip, not by a long shot, but he realized he worded the last choice wrong when Chan quickly got up and off of the bed to look at Jisung. 

 

“I don’t think you’re stupid, Jisung,” Chan tutted defensively and Jisung laughed lowly, swinging his legs out from underneath him so he sat crisscrossed on the edge of the bed, popping his fingers in his lap nervously. 

 

“I never said you thought that,” Jisung murmured lowly, patting the spot on the bed next to him wordlessly. Chan sighed and lowered himself back down on the bed after a few moments of hesitation, slumping with both guilt and relief when Jisung wrapped his arms around Chan’s bicep and rested his temple on the elder’s temple. “You’re too secretive. You need to open up some, Chan.” 

 

“I’m trying to be better.” 

 

“And you have. You’ve gotten so much better since we first met, but you’re still hiding a lot and I can tell it’s starting to mess with you,” Jisung reassured, but his eyes gleamed with disappointment and concern. Chan hated it, and just to avoid it, he craned his head back to nuzzle his nose into the side of Jisung’s head and let his eyes flutter shut. Chan believed he couldn’t be with the two, but he could at least imagine that he was for the sake of his sanity. 

 

“There are just some things I can’t do that with,” Chan mouthed against Jisung’s hair and the younger slumped. Before Jisung could grill him anymore then he had already, knocks came at the door before it squeaked open and Changbin’s dripping wet head peeped through the door to look inside. Chan felt his heart flutter when Changbin’s eyes only lit up when they locked with Chan’s _after_ he saw Jisung. But he didn’t let it last, slapping himself internally for seeing things that probably didn’t actually occur. “Hey, Bin,” Chan croaked, opening up the arm not occupied by Jisung and Changbin quickly hobbled over in his large sweater and black cotton shorts, sitting on the bed only to curl into Chan’s side like a cat. 

 

“You feeling better, love?” Jisung questioned quietly, looking at him over Chan’s chest and Changbin nodded his head wordlessly. Chan eyed the younger in concern, rubbing his hand up Changbin’s spine and neck before it reached Changbin’s head and swiped his fingers through Changbin’s hair in a comforting gesture. 

 

“I think both of you should head off to bed. It’s been a long day and both of you need to rest,” Chan murmured, shooing them off a bit, and the boys followed. They began to pad out of the room after murmuring quiet goodnights but then when Jisung was halfway out the door, Changbin tugged him back into the room, dropped his hand, and headed back toward Chan. The elder gaped in shock when the younger stepped between his legs and placed his hands on the back of Chan’s neck. “What’s wrong, Binnie?” Chan studied him in concern, instinctively placing his own hands on Changbin’s hips. 

 

Changbin seemed rather unsure about actually telling Chan what occupied his mind, but once Chan realized and began to rub soft circles into Changbin’s hipbones with his thumbs… Changbin became puddy in Chan’s hands. The younger let out a groan and leaned down to hide his face in the side of Chan’s head to make it a bit easier. “Can we stay with you tonight?” Chan tensed up in shock, prompting Changbin to tense up as well. “I-I just don’t want to be alone, and i-it would really help if you were t-there, ya know?” Changbin stammered and Chan sighed, shushing him a bit as he circled his arms around Changbin’s torso to rub small circles into his back when Changbin began to tremble lightly. 

 

“I probably won’t sleep tonight, Bin. I have a lot of thinking to do… but you two are very welcome to stay in my bed if that makes you feel better,” Chan murmured, flickering his eyes over to Jisung as the youngest of the trio flushed when he realized what Changbin asked. The raven-haired man nodded softly, separating himself from Chan with an abundance of reluctance before he rounded the corner and climbed under the covers. Chan stared back at the younger curled up with the covers tugged up to his chin before turning his head back to Jisung. “Come on, Ji. Don’t resist it. You know what Changbin says is law,” Chan snickered a bit, not surprised when he heard a grunt and the aggressive shifting of sheets behind him as Changbin tried to kick him in the back. 

 

Jisung rolled his eyes and approached the other side of the bed. “Don’t stay up too long, Chan. You need rest too,” Jisung ordered when Chan lifted himself from the end of the bed. The elder just rolled his eyes and clapped his hands on his way out, all the fires going out on command and leaving the room smelling like smokey lavender and the door shut tight. Changbin practically purred when he pulled Jisung into his chest and buried his nose into Chan’s pillow and all he could smell was the mixed scents of his lover and hopefully soon to be one. “I think we need to talk about Chan…” Jisung hushed quietly and Changbin froze up, heart beating a mile a minute. “Calm down, love. We both know both of us want that man,” Jisung giggled and Changbin had never been so thankful for Jisung’s bluntness. 

 

“So you like him too?” Changbin leveled his voice, not trusting it to go any higher without cracking. Jisung hummed and nodded. “Then… Then what do we do?” Changbin questioned quietly and Jisung just smirked, pulling his head away to look at his boyfriend for a moment, pulling him for a small kiss when he saw the pout. Changbin’s pout only deepened at the delay of Jisung’s answer. “There isn’t any time for kissing! We need to think about how we’re going to tell Chan!” Changbin scolded but Jisung just kissed him again. 

 

Again, and again, and again before it clicked in Changbin’s head.

 

“Oh…” 

 

Jisung chuckled warmly. “Of course we will all need to sit down and talk about it, but Chan doubts words in a lot of ways. He prefers actions, and trust me, I see the way he looks at us. There’s no way that man doesn’t have the slightest feelings for us…” Jisung laughed quietly and Changbin grinned from ear to ear shyly, casting his eyes downward as he traced a finger along the middle of Jisung’s chest. “We’ll have to be extra physical until he catches the hint alright? We’ll need to be patient because this is an incredibly sensitive situation…” 

 

“I didn’t even know you could date multiple people… but god he just fits so perfectly you know?” Changbin smiled like a love sick puppy and it made Jisung’s heart skip a beat. 

 

“Yeah… I know. I’ve been thinking about it for so long and I couldn’t wait for you two to meet so I could see how you acted around one another. I knew you’d like him… I just wanted to make sure.” Jisung murmured, swiping his thumb along Changbin’s cheek. The elder’s eyes began to droop from sleepiness and Jisung’s light touches. 

 

“Make sure he comes to bed tonight, baby,” Changbin slurred sleepily, letting his whole body relax and fall into sleep. All Jisung could think was that he was completely in love with a huge dork. 

  
  


Chan always preferred the atmosphere of the forest in the early morning with the sun just barely risen. When the sky became a deep mixture of light pink and orange, and the birds began to come out and sing. That’s how he always enjoyed the forest, it was one of the highlights of his day. 

 

But he couldn’t say the same for the forest at night. The thing about their kind and their world, it resembled the human world in a lot of cases as well. Not everything sung, pleasantness didn’t linger around all the time, and there was always a dark side to everything light. It was a sense of balance, and Chan knew this. That’s why he tried to keep away from the forest at night. Bad things, nightmarish things came out at night because their prey were in their post vulnerable state. 

 

The dancing ladies became monsters with gnawing teeth and black eyes, the once beautiful flowers that twinkle in the sun now rot and wrinkle once the moon hovers above them, and his mothers tree becomes one of out of a horror book with it’s dark purple leaves, bleeding black trunk, and the pond taken over by gruesome fungus and fish and frogs with three eyes. What was once beautiful under the run, became grey and nightmare invoking underneath the moon. 

 

Yet, Chan still wandered into the skeleton trees anyway, listening to the shrieking of the birds above with a wince but only one destination in mind. Chan loved his mother, and he loved the mother tree as well, so even when it was showing its worst face, Chan would still go visit it to just to see his mother. He fought off the bugs and the animals to the best of his ability, but by the time he reached the rotting flower fields, Chan stumbled through them as if he just went through war. He hated the forest at night. 

 

Chan climbed up onto the rock at the base of the tree, focusing on all the elements in the world around him, even the bad ones, and Chan felt himself relaxing back into that loop he hadn’t allowed himself to go in for a long, long time. He didn’t think he deserved it anymore, that he hadn’t earned the right to after the loss of the city around him, the loss of everyone around him. Chan thought he was better off alone. 

 

And then Jisung and Changbin came along and Chan felt conflicted to the highest degree. The last time he felt such feelings for someone was a girl a 100 years back, one that could grow flowers with a few whispers. She was kind, pure of heart, and so open to learning if it meant helping people. Chan tried his best to protect her, but the problem being associated with the shaman who caused a whole city to burn to the ground was that you were ridiculed by mere association. Chan woke up one morning and she was gone, and he didn’t see her again until a few days later, her body rotting as it hung from a tree and dried blood all around her gouged out eyes. 

 

On Chan’s worst days, every time he closed his eyes he could see her lifeless body hanging from a tree by her feet in front of his home. 

 

From that day forward, Chan swore off love in every manner except the one between a mother and a son. 

 

Chan hadn’t even realized tears were gushing down his cheeks until he felt warm, familiar hands wiping them away and Chan peeled his eyes open to lock gazes with his mother’s opal irises. “Mother…” Chan whimpered, arms instinctively coming up to wrap his arms tightly around her middle, much like he did when he was 6 and not letting her go. The woman gasped a little, pressing a hand to Chan’s head and bringing him into her chest to hold her a little more closely. 

 

“What’s wrong, Channie?” She whispered into his ear. She hasn’t seen her sons in 90 years and he’s crying his absolute eyes out in her arms. Chan simply cried harder in her arms, clutching her glittering robes a bit tighter as his younger siblings stared from their thrones in concern. “Chan, I need you to talk to me,” Gyuri hushed into his ear when he began to calm down, and Chan sniffled once, twice, and then three times before he began to croak out a small explanation. 

 

“Momma… I think I’ve fallen in love again, but it’s with two men as if one of them wasn’t bad enough,” Chan whined lowly in his throat, “I can’t be with either one of them either…” 

 

Gyuri giggled softly, twirling her fingers through Chan’s hair. “You can’t or you won’t?” 

 

Chan glanced down, squishing his cheek against her chest and staying silent for a few moments. “I can’t watch someone I love get hurt again…” Chan whispered, nuzzling his nose into her arm and the goddess continued to stroke his hair in comfort. 

 

“The thing about being a god, Channie, is that we will always watch the people we love get hurt because _everyone gets hurt_ . That doesn’t mean we have to live the rest of our days in fear. We’re going to be around for a long, long time and even from above we will watch war, we will watch blood shed, we will watch emotional and physical trauma. But we will also watch love, we will also watch happiness, and we will also watch serenity. You know that there’s a balance,” She explained thoughtfully, educating him on the ways even though she knew he knew the way this worked. He knew the balance of _his_ world. 

 

“I need advice, momma…” 

 

“Be patient, Channie. They’ll bring you into their fold when they’re ready.” Chan nodded mutely, pulling away to look at her and wipe away the snot dripping down his face. Just simply being in the universe made his skin begin to glitter with the pale yellow his mother’s did. “I’m so happy to see you again, my son…” She whispered evenly, stroking his cheek as she studied him. “Come home more often will you? You worry me when you go so long without coming to visit.” She scolded and Chan nodded. He missed her too. Missed his mother’s touch more than anything. “Have you thought about your… _state_ anymore since last time?” 

 

Chan looked down, scratching his forehead. “I have an idea of a deal we could make, but I need to defeat Chanyeol before I make any decisions,” Chan looked her right in the eye as he spoke, showing his firmness for the situation. She couldn’t argue with him on that one, and she wouldn’t try to either. She completely understood. 

 

“You have a year and a half to get them ready before he comes back and ready to fight for round 1. Be ready, Chan.” 

 

And then he heard the croaking of mutated frogs and the bristle of crisp leaves, and Chan realized he was back in the forest, back in the real world, where he wasn’t ready to face his problems quite yet. 

 

Chan took slow steps back to the court house, snakes hissing at him the whole way there but Chan didn’t care. If they snapped at him, he ripped them in half. If birds came flying at his head, he tore feathers. It may have been considered cruel, but these animals would eat him alive if he didn’t fight back, and Chan wasn’t ready to be eaten alive either. The court house was dead quiet when Chan finally reached the back door, hating the silence. He knew Jisung and Changbin were there, but when the house became silent at night, Chan felt as lonely as he did all those years ago when there was no one within a 10 mile radius. 

 

But then he started hearing their voices. He started hearing Changbin and Jisung call out for him softly, begging him to come back, and Chan’s feet hit the ground running. He practically sprinted down the hallway toward the sounds of the voices, making a b-line for his bedroom when the screams got louder. 

 

But when Chan slammed open the door, the two were fast asleep, curled up together off towards the right of the bed and leaving just enough space for Chan to worm his way into bed behind Jisung and still have a significant amount of space between him and the edge of the bed. Chan let out a deep, shaky breath at the sight of them perfectly fine, leaning against the doorway to give both his body and brain a moment to relax. However, that seemed to be his downfall because Changbin sat up sleepily, hair falling in his face and lips pouted. “Chan? You alright?” Chan stared at him from the side for a moment, gulping that lead to his Adam’s apple bobbing. Chan nodded his head shakily after letting out a breath. “Come to bed.” 

 

Chan didn’t try and argue it, figuring it was best to just give in and allow his needs a moment to breathe. His body wouldn’t stop trembling, and it certainly helped that it was definitely worth it when he approached the bed and Changbin’s eyes lit up. 

 

“Jisung! Jisung, move over. I want Chan in the middle,” Changbin shook Jisung awake, but the boy just groaned and rolled over far enough for Chan’s body to fit and Changbin slipped out of bed, whining a bit at the cold floors against his feet. 

 

“You didn’t have to do that. I could have just climbed over,” Chan whispered softly when they were face to face, a finger coming up to trace Changbin’s cupid bow. When Chan became sleepy, his self control ceased to exist. Changbin just shook his head. 

 

“And fight to get under the covers? No thanks. Now get in bed,” Changbin slapped his lower back and Chan laughed softly, climbing under the covers and relaxing into the mattress when Changbin climbed in after him. However, Chan froze up when Changbin placed his head on Chan’s chest and curled an arm around his stomach, and Jisung rolled back over with the blankets tugged back up to his chin but nose buried in Chan’s neck. Chan loved this feeling more than anything in the world, but that didn’t mean he was ready to face this all quite yet. 

 

Not like Chan had much of a choice though it looked like. 

 

“Get some sleep, Channie. Please? For me?” Changbin whispered quietly, half asleep and a little delirious if he were honest, but Chan grinned down at him lovingly anyway. 

 

“You can’t just say ‘for me’ and expect me to do what you want, Changbin,” Chan tutted as this hasn’t been the first time Changbin’s tried this. The younger smirked evilly, shifting his body up so they were chest to chest and Changbin’s breath fanned over Chan’s lips. 

 

“Please, hyung? For me?” Changbin tried again, nosing at Chan’s cheek when he leaned in to practically mouth the words against Chan’s lips and the elder’s breath caught in his throat. Changbin’s eyes flickered up to Chan’s, smirk falling into something a little more soft as he traced his pointer finger over Chan’s chest. 

 

“You’re evil,” Chan muttered, letting a hand slip onto Changbin’s waist and stroke gently into his back with the side of Chan’s thumb. Changbin laughed quietly, trying not to wake Jisung with his questionable antics and lowered himself back down onto Chan’s torso and relaxed. Chan began to run his fingers through Changbin’s hair, eyes trained on the ceiling in thought. Maybe they liked him back. Maybe this wasn’t as unrequited as he believed. 

 

Chan fell asleep with a smile on his face at the thought that maybe everything would end up being okay.

  
  


When Changbin woke up that following morning, he expected to roll over and find Chan and Jisung behind him, maybe even awake, but instead he woke up with neither one of them in bed and he pouted and groaned. He’d like to wake up to the others, it’d make him feel a little better and allow him to stay in bed for longer, but if both of them were up and running, then that mean’t Changbin needed to get out of bed before they _made_ him get out of bed. 

 

Changbin slipped on some socks before he left the room, deciding that Chan probably wouldn’t care and then headed toward the kitchen where he could hear them talking in hushed whispers. “Oh, hey, love,” Jisung greeted Changbin with a smile from the kitchen table when he noticed the elder enter, Chan sat across from him and offering him a timid one as well. Changbin nodded toward them both, but made a b-line for the fridge to grab a small banana milk carton before sitting down between the two with sleepy eyes. 

 

“You need to eat something,” Chan tutted when he saw that Changbin just planned on drinking the milk for the morning, and cut him a slice of the fresh bread he made earlier that morning and slathered some butter on it before handing it to the younger. Changbin didn’t even think twice before he stuffed part of it in his mouth, humming happily before resting his head on the table, hands occupied with holding the food up in the air. “Changbin, sit up,” Chan hushed softly, but kicked him under the table to really strike some fear into him but Changbin just scowled at him and kept his head lowered. “Changbin.”

 

The second eldest huffed and sat back in his chair, setting the milk down and crossing one arm over his chest while he ate from the other hand holding the bread., glaring Chan right in the eyes. Changbin was the first to look away.

 

“We need to talk about your training,” Chan muttered, slathering some butter on another slice of bread aggressively and Jisung’s eyes flickered between the two in confusion. _Why were they so fucking tense?_ “There are multiple ways of training, but you need to hone in one something when you go to control your abilities. Some people use hatred, some people use love, others use their need for power.” Chan explained to the best of his ability avoiding Jisung’s pointed look. 

 

“There’s another way, though. One I know you’ll like a lot better than all of that,” Jisung turned to Changbin before Chan could stop him, and the eldest of the three glared holes into his body. 

 

“It takes a long time, and there’s not enough of that right now. Jisung might be ready by that point but he has an entire year on you. There won’t be enough time so it’s not an option,” Chan argued, turning his attention toward the younger who now sat up in curiosity. Changbin wanted to know more about the thing Chan didn’t want him to know about all because Jisung opened his mouth. 

 

“Hyung…” Changbin murmured, reaching out to take Chan’s wrist that held the knife, shooting him glistening puppy dog eyes Changbin knew Chan was a sucker for. Chan’s eyes squeezed shut, jaw locking, and trying his absolute best to not give in but then Jisung got up from his chair to drop down to knees at Chan’s side and look up at him with the same fucking eyes, even going as far as to reach up and tilt Chan’s head down so the elder was forced to look at him if Chan opened his eyes. 

 

“Nope. Not opening them,” Chan swore and both younger boys grinned from ear to ear at the obvious lie. Jisung rose up from his kneeled position and boldly sat in Chan’s lap, Chan dropping the knife in shock, but keeping his eyes squeezed shut. “Nope,” Chan’s voice cracked as he spoke. Jisung didn’t give up though, twining his arms around Chan’s neck and pressing their foreheads together to nuzzle their noses a little bit. “No…” Chan breathed out shakily, eyes still snapped shut but fluttering a little bit. Chan was about to break. Jisung slid his head down, keeping his forehead flush against Chan’s face as he pressed his lips beneath Chan’s ear, and the elder gasped, eyes snapping open and before he could close them again when Jisung moved away, he took a hand from Chan’s neck and clamped it around Chan’s jaw instead. 

 

“You know he deserves better. He deserves to control the foundation his ability thrives on. You know that.” And Chan submitted. The man relaxed into his chair, moving his head away from Jisung’s to look at Changbin, to look at his reaction, but Changbin looked relaxed, pleased even, and Chan felt a lot less guilty for letting Jisung in his lap and kiss him as if they were lovers. “Are you going to tell him? Or should I?” Jisung inquired, and Chan sighed. 

 

“Why don’t you teach him? Take him to the tree and show him what I showed you, hm?” Chan hummed, cocking his head to the side and resting his hands on the tops of Jisung’s thighs. But Jisung just shook his head. 

 

“You’re a good teacher, Chan. I’d just want to guide him the whole time. You’ll let him figure it out on his own and only butting in when needed,” Jisung retorted and Chan groaned loudly. 

 

“Fine. Alright,” Chan muttered, nudging Jisung off of his lap so he could stand up and take Changbin’s hand to guide him out of the kitchen and into the yard. “Come on, I’ll explain on the way. And Jisung,” Chan stopped halfway out the door, turning back to the boy still sitting at the table. Jisung looked up with cheeks stuffed full of bread and wide, innocent eyes, “since you so graciously handed training off to me, you’re in charge of the dishes and lunch today,” Chan grinned and Jisung let out a loud groan Changbin could hear from the bottom of the steps. 

 

Their boy was a mess in his own right. 

  
  


Training went about as well as one would expect with a situation as complex and sensitive as Changbin’s and Chan’s. Changbin was a good student, Chan could give him that, but it was hard to teach a man that wouldn’t stop touching you at every waking moment, Chan thought he learned that well enough with Jisung, but it seemed Changbin was on an entirely new level of touchiness. Changbin always wanted to hold hands when they walked into the forest every morning, and he wouldn’t let go until Chan had to leave once Changbin sat on the rock. Changbin always back hugged Chan every moment he got, and more times than not, Chan woke up to Changbin in his bed and laying on his chest. The man was a leech, and Chan didn’t know how to treat the situation. 

 

If time hadn’t been so fragile during the moments they were together, Chan wouldn’t have found it as an issue and let the boy do as he wished, but they were on a time crunch so Chan became a lot more strict, and distanced himself in a way that even made Jisung uneasy. Chan didn’t mean to, and he wished he was allowed to go back to the way it used to be, but there were things they needed to get done before time was no longer within their grasps. 

 

But then Changbin became defiant. He became snappy, unwilling to do training anymore and took meditation anything but seriously. It became tiresome, and Chan thought it might have been a one day thing but after three days of none stop sass from the younger, Chan had enough. “Would you please sit down and focus on the elements? Please?” Chan sighed, rubbing at his temples in irritation. Changbin just smirked and crossed his arms over his chest and jutting one hip out. That pose was kind of sexy at first, but now Chan would _kill_ for Changbin to never make it again. 

 

“No. I want to go back home and read,” Changbin stomped his foot like a child. “You’ve been so rude and strict lately and to be honest… I’ve had enough of it…” Changbin trailed off with a weird lilt to his tone, approaching Chan, and the elder began to step backward, stopping abruptly when his back hit the tree and Changbin’s palms landed on his chest. Chan’s eyes narrowed, and then he disappeared right out from underneath Changbin’s hands and the boy whirled around wildly in search of the elder. 

 

Chan stood a foot behind him, a snarl on his features as he shot forward and pinned Changbin to the tree, hands on the truck beside both sides of Changbin’s head. “Yeah well, I’ve had enough of you. What the fuck is your problem huh? What the actual hell has you all bent out shape? Will you please for the love of god tell me so we can continue training and you won’t die in a little over a year?” Chan snapped. 

 

Silence draped over them after that, Changbin and Chan never breaking eye contact as Chan inched his head forward a little bit. 

 

“Show me if you have to.” 

 

Things happen quickly around here, and neither one of them should have suspected that things would go the pace they needed them to, but when it comes to their kind and love, you have to act on it quickly, because none of them ever know if they’ll wake up the next morning. It was dangerous for them, so they treated the situation as if it were life or death. 

 

Changbin shot forward, hands coming up to Chan’s face and cupping his cheeks as their mouths moved feverishly against one another’s. It took Chan a moment to register what happened, but his hands wrapped around Changbin’s waist instinctively and tug his body that much closer to his own, until they were flush in every way possible. The smacking of their lips sounded rather obscure against the background noises of the forest, but they didn’t pay attention to that. They focused on the other’s heartbeat and the way their touches burned against their skin. 

 

Chan pulled away when their tongues began to mingle, head spinning from the lack of oxygen, and pupils wide and nearly taking over the pale blue of his irises. Chan knew they needed to talk about this, talk about the consequences, but when he saw Changbin’s kiss-swollen lips and dazed features, he dived in for more with the same amount of intensity from before. 

 

After a while though, Changbin needed to slow down, scared he might go into cardiac arrest. “Chan-Channie, slow down, my lips hurt,” Changbin gasped against his mouth when Chan began to nibble on his lower lip and swipe his tongue over the abused skin. Chan complied, slowing the movement of his lips and being much more gentle then he had before and Changbin hummed in gratitude. Changbin grabbed the back of Chan’s hair though, tangling the curls in his hair and tugging on them to drag Chan’s head down to his neck. 

 

Chan got the message, latching his lips onto the tendon on Changbin’s neck and sucking lightly, not enough to mark but enough to cause Changbin’s breath to hitch. “No marks, love,” Chan whispered against his skin and Changbin snapped his eyes open. _Fuck_.  

 

“Don’t worry about it,” Changbin gasped out when Chan began to nibble along his jaw. Chan stopped, frozen, and took his head out of Changbin’s neck. Changbin took Chan’s face into his hands gently, rubbing his thumbs along the dark circles under Chan’s eyes. “Hyung… don’t worry about it,” Changbin emphasized, hoping to Gyuri that Chan would catch on. Luckily, he did. 

 

“Oh…”

 

“Yeah, ‘Oh’, you big idiot,” Changbin giggled, leaning forward to peck his lips. “We’ll have to talk about it later, but for now can you just…,” Changbin trailed off shyly, tugging at Chan’s collar with a cough. 

 

“Sure, love,” Chan grinned, heart beating a mile a minute as he dove back in with the pure intention of making Changbin’s heart do the same. 

  
  


They went back to the courthouse separately. Chan had gone in first, letting Changbin make up for all the meditation he’s ignored over the last few days and so Chan could clear his head. The guilt of kissing Changbin without Jisung being there began to set in and he couldn’t even look Jisung in the eye when he walked into the lounge area and saw Jisung curled up in one of the chairs with a book. “Hey, hyung,” Jisung called out timidly, eyes still locked on the book in hand. When Chan didn’t respond, Jisung glanced up, glasses and fluffy hair and all and Chan’s heart skipped a beat. “Hyung…?” Jisung trailed off cautiously.

 

Chan made a break for it, shaking his head and darting down the hallway to make it to his room. He heard Jisung call out to him, even get up from his chair, but Chan made sure his door slammed shut so Jisung got the message and Chan slid down the slab of wood to bury his head into his knees. 

 

He was so fucked. 

 

Changbin came home a bit later, all smiles and giggles and practically radiating giddiness the moment he stepped through the door. Jisung was in the kitchen now, hovering over a pot of soup and humming and dancing along to the music playing. “Evening, baby,” Changbin acted as if he were tipping his hat and bowed playfully and Jisung’s eyes practically lit up at the sound of his lover’s voice. Jisung twirled around, wooden spoon in hand and licking at the sides. 

 

“Hey, love,” Jisung murmured, letting Changbin pull him in by his hips and feather kisses to his jaw. “How’d training go today?” Jisung whispered, curling his arms around Changbin’s neck and nuzzling their noses together. Changbin somehow grinned even wider. “Did you make good progress? Chan wasn’t really up for speaking when he got home. He just kind of ran off to his room.” 

 

Changbin didn’t answer him as he leaned in to kiss Jisung’s lips gingerly, gripping tightly at the back of his shirt. “Guess who you just second handedly kissed,” Changbin whispered once they parted and Jisung reeled his head back in shock. Jisung gasped when he saw the forming hickies on Changbin’s neck. 

 

“Oh hell no, guess who's about to get their first-hand kiss!” Jisung shrieked, pulling away from Changbin and only laughing and turning back to him with “Watch dinner for me, will you babe?” When Changbin tried calling out to him. 

 

Jisung stormed down the hallway, one objective in mind, and didn’t stop for one second once he slammed open the door and startled Chan away from the book in his lap. “Jisung!” Chan yelled, holding his chest in fright and peeling his round glasses off to set them on the bed. “I thought you knew manners! Knock next time!” Chan scolded, teeth bared but Jisung glared at him, faking his anger just to give the elder a bit of a fright. 

 

“Kissing my boyfriend now, are we?” Jisung hissed low, amusement swirling in his chest when all the color drained from Chan’s face and he looked at Jisung with horror. 

 

“L-Listen, Jisung, I didn’t mean-“ They moved at the same time, Jisung marching over to the side of the bed Chan was attempting to slide off of so he could stand up, and they met in the middle. The moment Chan sat on the edge of the bed, Jisung reached him and grabbed him by his shoulders to shove him back down on the bed, cutting Chan off as he climbed on top of him. “Jisung…” Chan breathed out, resisting the urge to place his hands on the back of Jisung’s thighs when the younger’s knees caged Chan’s hips on the mattress. 

 

Jisung didn’t say anything at first, moving his hands up to cup Chan’s cheeks and lean down far enough where they weren’t kissing, but Chan could still feel Jisung’s lips graze against his when he spoke. “We come as a package deal. You take one, you also take the other,” Jisung purred, hearing Chan swallow a bit. “Understood?” 

 

“Yes…” Chan whispered, and Jisung smiled as he leaned in to capture Chan’s lips slowly but with purpose. Chan kissed back with the same intensity, backing up on the bed a bit so Jisung wouldn’t fall off, and Jisung followed, kissing a little more vigorously until Chan completely pulled away, hand coming up to rest on one of Jisung’s cheeks as the other arm worked to prop himself up on his elbow. “But you also need to understand something…” Chan murmured, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “I’ve been waiting for both of you for a long, long time… and now that I have you, it’s very unlikely I’m going to let you go so easily…” 

 

“We’ll talk about this in a little bit. In the meantime… Changbin got hickies, and I want some fucking hickies too,” Jisung sassily interfered and Chan rolled his eyes, gripping Jisung’s hips to roll them both over so he could have Jisung at his mercy. 

 

“So demanding…” Chan purred into Jisung’s neck, feathering light kisses into Jisung’s neck and the younger groaned, twining his legs around Chan’s thighs and tugging him in closer so Chan fell to his elbows. 

 

“Yeah, I’ve waited a year and a half to have you, so get to it,” Jisung griped and who was Chan to say no? He tried to be more gentle with Jisung, realizing the sudden intensity in the situation as they seemed to start at 1 and jump to about 1000 within the day, but they’ve been pining for so long… desires are bound to want to be met. 

 

Chan kissed all around Jisung’s neck, waiting and listening for that hitch of a breath that told Chan where Jisung’s sweet spot resided and when he found it, he treated Jisung’s skin with kindness he didn’t with Changbin. Chan would be sure to be more gentle next time. _Next time…_ “Channie…” Jisung breathed when Chan came to a halt, mind busy with the thought of the future instead of the present and Chan quickly got back to work. 

 

“Sorry, baby,” Chan whispered against his skin, leaning up to kiss his ear lobe slightly before focusing on the flower he attempted to create on Jisung’s neck. When he became satisfied enough with it, Chan trailed his lips back up to Jisung and kissed him so softly, so sweetly, it felt like Jisung was on a sugar high. “There, you got your hickies,” Chan teased, getting up and off of Jisung to straighten himself up. Jisung groaned, stretching on the bed so far until his muscles were on the verge of cramping. Jisung relaxed back on the bed with a breath, letting his eyelids flutter shut. 

 

The youngest was so content in that moment that the feet hanging off the bed began to dance slightly, twirling his ankles to the beat in his own head and Chan watched with a goofy smile. 

 

“You’re a mess,” Chan hushed, slipping a hoodie on over his head and Jisung began to move his entire body at the comment. He wiggled like a baby on their back, and Chan found it rather painful to watch if he were honest. So, he grabbed Jisung’s ankles, tugged him down until he was slipping off the bed and shrieking for Chan to stop, and then next thing Jisung knew, he was thrown over Chan’s shoulder like a sack of potatoes. 

 

“This is so unnecessary!” Jisung shrieked, beating against Chan’s back in an effort to get Chan to put him down, but Chan didn’t give in until they reached the kitchen where Changbin waited patiently making dinner. “Love, please save me,” Jisung whined when they entered the kitchen, but Changbin just laughed fondly. 

 

“Hyung, put him down, dinner’s almost ready,” Changbin uttered softly and Chan listened, lowering Jisung into a chair but Jisung kept his arms hooked around Chan’s neck when he bent down so Jisung could steal another kiss. 

 

“Don’t be greedy, Ji,” Chan tutted, sitting down in the chair opposite him so Jisung couldn’t do anything he wasn’t supposed to do, even if they all had a mutual understanding at the moment. Changbin came around with the pot of soup, spooning ladles into their bowls as he hummed and twirled around. “This looks good,” Chan hummed to the two, placing a hand on Changbin’s lower back as he came over to his side. 

 

“Thanks. I hope it _is_ good. The meat took a while to cook so it might be a bit-“ Jisung stuck his tongue out and gagged for reference when he couldn’t find the right words. Chan only looked him dead in the eye as he blew on a spoonful before placing it in his mouth, and surprisingly enough, it tasted wonderful. 

 

“No need to fret. It’s really good,” Chan complimented and Jisung relaxed in his seat with a breath. 

 

“Oh be quiet, Jisung. Everything you make tastes good,” Changbin snapped playfully and Jisung waved his spoon threateningly in his direction. 

  


Surprisingly enough, dinner wasn’t awkward. They were quiet of course, but it wasn’t an awkward silence. They actually ate quickly, eager to get to the conversation at hand, but over time Chan went for another few spoonfuls because his hunger  was insatiable, the other two shared a look. “I think we’re just going to have this conversation now. Keep eating, hyung,” Changbin snickered when Chan froze, mouth open and spoon hovering above his teeth. Chan snapped his mouth shut so quickly his teeth scraped against the metal. 

 

“Sorry…” Chan whispered, slowly putting the soon back in the bowl and sitting back with his arms loosely crossed over his stomach. “I want to talk first,” Chan stated and Jisung and Changbin gestured for him to talk. “I’m not sure how this is going to go. I’ve never done this before and I’ve been around for _eras_ but I want you to know that no matter how this ends… I thank you both for at least giving me hope that there’s a chance for us to be together.” 

 

Changbin and Jisung stared at him with solemn eyes. “I haven’t done anything like this either. I could barely accept the fact that I was gay a few years ago so this is… new and scary and we’re just going to have to be open with one another. Communication is key here,” Changbin looked between them both and they both nodded. “I really, _really_ like you both and I want to call you both mine,” Changbin whispered. 

 

“We’re yours, love,” Chan reached across the table to take Changbin’s hand into his own, “All yours.” Changbin kind of felt like crying in that moment. This was his family. 

 

Jisung got up from his chair to approach Changbin’s side. “Love, look at me,” Jisung tilted Changbin’s chin up with his fingers hooked around it. Changbin glanced up at him with glossy eyes and Jisung softly rubbed his thumb underneath them with a fond smile. “I know you’ve been waiting for this kind of love for a long time, and you have it, but remember… nice and slow,” Jisung murmured, feathering a kiss to Changbin’s cheek. “So… you two are my boyfriends now, huh?” Jisung smirked, and the two rolled their eyes. 

 

“Yes, Jisung.” 

 

“Just checking,” Jisung raised his hands up in surrender. Changbin reached for him and pulled him into his lap, slathering kisses to his neck and cheek as Chan watched and ate the rest of his soup. 

 

“We need to place some ground rules though,” Chan muttered and the two stopped goofing around. “Just because we are dating does not mean you two can shirk your duties. Time is sensitive and we have very little of it. No more games, no more plans. We have to take this seriously,” Chan insisted, crossing his arms over his stomach and looking away. “I know better than anyone that Chanyeol must die.”

 

“We’re going to take care of it, Chan. We’ll give him everything we’ve got,” Changbin promised, and Chan nodded his head gratefully. “I wanted to talk to you about something though… About a vision I had when I meditated earlier,” Changbin murmured and Chan perked up in interest. “I saw butterflies. Little metallic butterflies that looked like opals.” 

 

Chan and Jisung jumped up. “Are you sure it was a vision? Not something that actually happened?” Changbin nodded his head with a pout.

 

“They swarmed this little cherry blossom tree on top of this mountain. I think they _became_ the leaves,” Changbin explained. “I’ve never seen those type of butterflies before…” Changbin admitted shyly with a pout and Chan stared at him in shock. 

 

“Their Gyuri’s butterflies. That’s her human world form. Chan, what does that mean?” Jisung turned toward the elder, and Chan rested his elbows on the table, sinking his head down so he looked at his lap and could run his fingers through his hair. 

 

“It means we still have time,” Chan’s voice cracked, looking up at them with glossy eyes. “We still have hope.” 

 

**END OF SECTION III**

  
  
  
[[MOODBOARD]](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1143300171721261056?s=20)  
  



	13. SECTION IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If this is our last hope
> 
> We would see a sign, oh
> 
> We would see a sign

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last stretch everyone ;)

“Hello?”

 

_“We need to talk”_

 

“Ah… Didn’t know you were still alive and kicking.” 

 

_“Painfully so… We have a problem.”_

 

“What kind of problem?”

 

_“He’s back.”_

  
  


_**SECTION IV** _

_**“42”** _

 

_**If this is our last hope** _

_**We would see a sign, oh** _

_**We would see a sign** _

 

 ****[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1145756759178584065?s=20)]


	14. AWAKE MY SOUL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “In these bodies we will live, in these bodies we will die  
> Where you invest your love, you invest your life”

 

** March 2020 **

  


Time…

 

Time is precious. 

 

Growing up, people tend to forget that time is the only thing that never stops. One day, everything will stop, but time will continue to pass, unharmed, and fully ready to keep on with its task. Not even bearers of time could simply stop it altogether. Even in their realms, time went so slow it seemed as if it stopped but it didn’t. 

 

Time never stops, and we realize that when it’s far too late. 

 

People grow up wishing for time to move faster, they wish for time to skip forward until they’re adults and can live their life as they want to without parental control. However, as soon as their lives begin to show an older age, where they don’t get to do everything they love anymore, they wish for time to move backward. If humans could help it, they’d stick with one time where they were at their happiest, unaging and living happily until the world ends or their bodies give out. 

 

But time doesn’t work that way, and even if humans would do just about anything to go back to a time where their lives were simpler and they didn't have anything to worry about, time will still move and they will still have to move with it. 

 

It always messed with Chan a bit. He’s been around since practically the creation of the Earth, and he’s seen war, creation and falls of empires, the birth of society’s geniuses, the rise of America, the fall of Japan, the world wars, the largest eruptions the world has seen, the whole lot. Yet, he still stares up at the ceiling in the middle of the night wondering when the world will no longer require him to physically hang around. 

 

When Chan dies and finally joins his mother’s side amongst the stars, he’ll be put in charge of the earth. In short, he will replace Gyuri as the god of their people and she will focus more on the entirety of the universe. It’s intimidating yes, and Chan isn’t sure he’s ready for that kind of job, but it’s not as if he has much of a choice in the long run. 

 

But with time moving and the due date of Chanyeol in just a few months, Chan wondered if his death was a lot quicker than he thought. 

 

“Chan! Watch out!” Chan just barely snapped out of his thoughts before he went head first into a tree trunk, falling onto the ground on his back and clutching his nose while groaning. He felt two figures hovering above him, blocking the sun from his closed eyes and Chan opened them to see Changbin hovering over him with a shit eating grin and Yuna cocked her head to the side to study him in confusion. “Did you break it?” Changbin questioned, hand draping over Chan’s to pull it away from his nose. It was bleeding profusely, the blood beginning to drip down into his mouth. “You idiot…” 

 

Chan just batted Changbin’s hands away, hovering his palm over his nose again and letting his markings glow with the opal translucency of his mother. Chan relaxed into the ground with a pleased sigh as the bone cracked back in place and all the blood began to dry up and Chan’s hand dropped away from his nose. 

 

“You’ve been in your head so much lately… What’s wrong?” Changbin murmured, still squatted down at Chan’s side and the elder sighed, sitting up so his knees were bent and he could rest his elbows on the tops of them. 

 

“I’m just stressed. We only have a few months left before Chanyeol is at full strength again,” Chan explained, tapping his tattooed fingers against his face in thought. Changbin didn’t say anything, taking Chan’s hands and placing them on Changbin’s arms where the markings were beginning to make their way up Changbin’s limbs because of his growing strength. “I know… You’re a lot stronger than you used to be…” Chan took Changbin’s hands into his own before looking up at him. “I’m just scared it might not be enough and you’ll get hurt.” 

 

Changbin laughed a bit, helping Chan back up on his feet in the process. They both panted, having run for a few miles in the woods that morning much like they did every morning since Changbin began training (Jisung always skipped out on exercising because he said it was pointless and he’d much rather sleep and come back to them looking all sweaty and flushed when they were done. Chan and Changbin would have argued with it if the comment didn’t make them even more flustered and Jisung wasn’t being useful by hacking into businesses to help prepare for missions) “Someone will get hurt, it’s inevitable. Let’s just focus on taking down Chanyeol, hm?” 

 

“Right… We should probably head back soon. Jisung is probably awake by now and you need to shower and get changed so you two can get on the road.” Chan slapped at Changbin’s stomach, feet kicking against the ground and heading back toward the courthouse. Changbin didn’t hesitate to follow, catching up so they could jog side by side through the trees. 

 

Running with Chan was like therapy for Changbin because while you could talk to Chan, the elder’s presence while doing something that relieved stress was enough in its own right. Much like Chan had thought, Jisung sat on the steps with messy hair, tired eyes, and a cup of coffee cupped in his hands. Changbin and Chan cooed at the sight. “Morning, Ji,” Changbin called out, stopping at the bottom of the steps, hands on his hips and panting heavily. 

 

Jisung was so tired that he couldn’t even properly appreciate the sight of his boyfriends. Changbin always wore muscle tees and shorts when he worked out, showing his growing biceps and chest perfectly, but now that Chan was beginning to grow more comfortable sharing his tattoos and markings with the two, he wore tank tops that exposed his sides and arms and part of his chest as well and it made Jisung’s heart and mind race. 

 

But since he stayed up all night last night hacking into a businesses cameras and system so they wouldn’t work at all the next day and wouldn’t work until a few days later so Jisung could come and go as he pleased digitally. They didn’t like stealing money and supplies from people, but they deemed it necessary when the people were downright assholes. Jisung’s favorite hobby was judging people’s moral compasses. “Morning, hyungs.” 

 

“Sleep well?” Chan grunted, sitting down on the step a few down from Jisung so he could rest his sweaty temple against the side of Jisung’s knee. 

 

“What do you think?” Jisung grumbled, tangling his fingers in Chan’s sweaty curls and tugging on them playfully to earn a wince from the elder. 

 

Changbin’s eyebrows furrowed. “Were you up all night again?” Changbin worried, going to join Jisung’s side and twine an arm around Jisung’s waist. Jisung glanced away. 

 

“Yeah…” the truth was that Jisung wouldn’t be this exhausted if he had just stayed up all night. Instead, he stayed in his realm long enough to be awake for two days straight, and his body was beginning to give out from the lack of energy. Jisung was much stronger than he was before, meaning he could hold it for a long time and block Chan out of the realm too. It took a lot out of him, and he knows he shouldn’t push it the way he had but Jisung… Jisung felt like he was losing it. 

 

Jisung had been strong for so long, dodging not only bullies and teachers that had it out for him because of his class since day one, but the government as well because Jisung has had to hide everything about himself all his life and even now, when he was with the loves of his life, he still felt like he needed to hide for the sake of the world at hand. 

 

Jisung hated it. “Hey, hey, hey, come back down to earth, baby. Stop crying,” Chan suddenly pivoted his body in the most uncomfortable position, knee on the step between Jisung’s legs and hands coming up to wipe away Jisung’s tears. Jisung hadn’t even realized he was crying, but once he did, it only became more intense, tears gushing down flushed, chubby cheeks, his lips wobbled as incoherent words left his mouth and just like that, the dam holding everything Jisung has felt over the years broke open and Jisung was unable to try and stop it. 

 

Chan and Changbin held Jisung tightly, wiping away his tears to the best of their ability and whispering reassurances into his ear. Poor little Yuna was the only one who could get Jisung to really calm down though with her nose nuzzles into the back of his head. Chan and Changbin both knew this was bound to happen eventually, but they hadn’t expected it to be so intense and not know the last straw had been before it all came crashing down. “I-I c-can’t do this a-anymore,” Jisung blubbered into Chan’s neck, clutching his collar so tightly in his hands they fear the fabric might rip or Jisung’s fingertips will start bleeding. Whichever comes first. 

 

“What do you mean, baby?” Changbin whispered in Jisung’s ear, feathering a few comforting kisses underneath it in hopes of getting the younger to calm down. Jisung came up to clutch the arm of the raven-haired man that rested across his chest. Changbin began to rub his hand up and down his bicep afterward. 

 

“I can’t be strong anymore. I can’t hold it all again. I can’t act like I’m ready for any of this. I’m scared shitless. I’m tired of hiding.” Jisung wailed, half of it barely understandable but the three knew each other better than anyone else could. They knew exactly what Jisung was saying, even if he didn’t exactly say it. 

 

“You don’t need to hide anything about yourself with us, Jisung… You know that. We get you’re scared, I’d be a little concerned if you _weren’t_.” Chan laughed a bit, rubbing his thumb into the apple of Jisung’s cheek and staring at him with such a lovesick gaze it overwhelmed Jisung. “Tell us the truth. Why are you so tired?” Chan even knew that Jisung wasn’t exhausted for no reason at all. 

 

“Last night… I slipped into my realm. I squeezed in two days,” Jisung whispered, squeezing his eyes shut in fear of their reactions. However, when nothing came, Jisung peeked an eye open to see Chan gazing at him in both horror and amazement. 

 

“How did I not know? Your realm doesn’t affect me!” Chan whispered, eyes twinkling with curiosity. 

 

“I can block you out now… It takes a lot more out of me but I can do it.” 

 

Chan burst out into giddy laughter, arm coming around Jisung’s back while he shoved him down onto the concrete step to soften the blow when he tackled Jisung into a hug. The younger was too shocked to register it, so his arms flying up was more instinctive than anything. “Do you know what this means?” Chan beamed, lifting his head up to look at Jisung. 

 

“What?” 

 

“It means you’re strong enough to knock a Demi god out of your world, Jisung. _You’re ready_.“ Chan murmured and Jisung’s eyes watered a bit. “Now, that doesn’t mean you get a free pass. What you did was incredibly stupid and because of this, you’re staying home and resting today,” Chan pointed his finger in the younger’s face and Jisung gulped, flickering his eyes over to the second oldest. 

 

“What about Changbin? Who’s going to go into town with him today?” Jisung murmured with a frown and Chan took a deep breath, getting up and off of Jisung to look at them both. 

 

“I’ll go…” 

 

Chan and Changbin glanced at Chan in shock, not expecting that at all. “Chan… Are you sure? I can go alone…” Changbin trailed off carefully but Chan just shook his head and waved him off. 

 

“I need… I need to show my face again. I can finally put that leather jacket to use,” Chan winked in Jisung’s direction and the younger flushed. For Christmas, Jisung had gotten them personalized leather jackets for shits and giggles really, but they quickly turned into something they took rather seriously and always wore them out, sealing the deal when they finally got some motorcycles as well. Chan didn’t really like them at first as he always emphasized that they shouldn’t draw attention to themselves, but after a while, (especially when Changbin gained some muscle and Jisung started wearing the punk style a bit more) he warmed up to the idea. 

 

His jacket was pretty sick too, ‘Shaman’ was written across the shoulders in bold white letters and a distorted mixture of the two symbols on his hands in the middle, designed by Jisung as well, so it wasn’t really tacky. Theirs were similar, except they distorted their own symbols and Changbin’s had Dragon written across the shoulders and Jisung’s was Cronus. 

 

“Alright well… both of you go shower and get ready. I’ll make some breakfast and then crawl up in bed,” Jisung shooed them off and they both kissed him on the lips before they raced off into the bathroom to shower. Jisung’s pretty sure he heard Changbin pull Chan into the same bathroom but Jisung chose to ignore it for the sake of his sanity and heated up a pan as he prepared the eggs to go in. 

 

Mundane tasks in this kind of life felt like a time of pure peace for Jisung, and he looked forward to these peaceful moments of the most boring shit ever because _he felt safe_. But even as he poured the eggs into the pan and watch them sizzle and cook around the edges, he couldn’t stop staring. He barely registered the fuck that they were burning in front of his very eyes. 

 

It was only when the oil from the pan popped and hit Jisung in the face that he realized what was happened and cursed. Jisung wiped the burning spot on his cheekbone and threw the eggs out to try again. The problem was that Jisung was so out of it that he kept burning them, and by the time Chan and Changbin came back in dressed and ready to eat, Jisung was trembling above the stove, hands dangerously close to burning themselves on the eyes as the eggs burned to a crisp right in front of his eyes. “Ah, Jesus, Jisung,” Changbin groaned, pinching his nose to block out the smell. Jisung sniffled once, tensing when Chan came up behind him and twined his arms around his middle. 

 

“Come on, back away from the stove. Let’s get some sleep, hm?” Chan murmured into Jisung’s ear, kissing it lightly knowing fully well that his weak spot was that exactly. “That’s good, baby. Good boy,” Chan praised when Jisung pushed himself away from the stove. Anytime before Chan tried this with Jisung, the boy would get irritable, but Jisung needed to be taken care of as well, and it seems he finally realized this because he gave in instantly. 

 

Changbin watched them with a grin playing on his face. “Good baby…” Changbin’s eyes rolled into the back of his head at the needy, whiny blubber from Jisung when Chan lifted him up bridal style. _Big baby…_ “Ah yes, my beautiful biker boyfriend carrying me to bed in the leather jacket I got him and looking like an entire badass… Is this a dream?” Jisung teased, mouthing a kiss to Chan’s jaw that was far from sexy and just more sloppy and gross. So Chan just laughed. 

 

“Love, mind opening the door for me? I shut it on my way out,” Chan turned to his other boyfriend and Changbin slowly jogged forward to open the door and lift back the covers so Chan could slide Jisung into bed once they got there. Yuna jumped up at the foot of the bed, even curled up, she took up a good portion of the bed due to her size. Jisung didn’t mind. “Alright, baby, get some sleep okay? If you wake up before we get home, please don’t do anything strenuous,” Chan ordered, tucking Jisung in and kissing him on the lips softly. Jisung giggled like a giddy little kid, wrapping his arms around Chan’s neck for one more kiss before he looked toward Changbin and made grabby hands for him. 

 

Changbin nudged Chan aside so he could bend down and press his lips to Jisung’s, moving slowly and softly and slowly parting his lips when Jisung swiped his tongue across his bottom lip. “We’ve gotta go, baby,” Changbin whispered against his lips, pulling away slightly. Jisung groaned, sinking back into the bed and throwing his arms under the blankets to warm himself up. 

 

“Good luck, today. I’m proud of you, Chan.” 

 

And then Jisung was out like a light, eyes dropping closed, eyebrows relaxing, and already fluffy cheeks somehow puffing out even more. “His cheeks are so cute,” Changbin pouted as soon as they left the bedroom and Chan turned to Changbin with a grin, lifting his hand up and pinching Changbin’s cheeks softly. 

 

“So are yours, my love,” Chan complimented with a quiet tone, moving his hand down to take Changbin’s jaw in his fingers and lean forward to kiss his lips. “My beautiful, pretty love of my life.” Changbin’s eyes glossed over, punching Chan in the chest. 

 

“Now is not the time to be cheesy,” Changbin scolded as Chan laughed loudly while he followed Changbin back through the courthouse, into the kitchen, down into the yard, into the shed, and down in the tunnels where their bikes waited for them. “Alright, Jisung and I put this plan together so let me run you through it.” 

 

“Alright.” 

 

“We’re going back to my hometown…” Chan glanced at Changbin in shock. “Jisung and I have found a place there that might sell us wanted and valuable items, or maybe even information,” Changbin yelled over the roaring of the motorcycles. “Jisung and I did some research the other day on what could be of use to us when we take on Chanyeol, and his legends speak of a skull. A rabbits skull oddly enough that holds the eyes made of the universe. Apparently, he’s been after it so long it’s become his Achilles heel,” Changbin called out. Chan knew of this legend, but he didn’t think it existed. These were stories that Chan grew up being told. 

 

“I don’t even know if it exists, Changbin!” Chan called out, but Changbin just shook his head. 

 

“It’s worth a shot! The legend says that if we destroy it while he’s there, he’ll perish! No one will ever see him again.” And Changbin was right. It’s so worth a shot. 

 

“Just promise me we won’t break our backs to find it. I don’t want to find something and expect it to work but it only turns out as a false legend. We need to focus on being prepared to fight him ourselves,” Chan yelled as they rounded a corner and Changbin nodded in understanding. They didn’t talk much after that, but when they reached the entrance, coming to a stop. However, before Changbin could press the button for the entrance to open and let them up, Chan couldn’t help but be concerned. “Changbin… are you sure this is a good idea? What if someone recognizes you?” 

 

Changbin stared at Chan for a moment, unblinking. “My future is more important than my past,” Changbin muttered before slamming the red button on the wall with the side of his fist. The ramp to the warehouse above lowered down with a whirring sound, and when it finally hit the ground, the two rode up into the surface and saw a few of the mechanics. “Morning, boys,” Changbin saluted them on their way out, Chan doing the same, and then they rode off and into the city. 

 

Changbin knew they were receiving looks, and he felt like he was ready to hyperventilate when he saw so many familiar faces on the street. But having Chan by his side was enough to keep himself calm. “So, where is this place?” 

 

Changbin didn’t answer right away, seeing it pop up in the distance and speed up. Chan huffed, not liking Changbin’s unwillingness to share secrets, but soon turned into a whimpering puppy when Changbin pulled into a parking lot, hopped off his bike, and took off his helmet only to rip Chan’s off when the elder stopped. The last thing Chan expected was for Changbin to grip his chin and then press their lips together roughly. 

 

“Love-“ Chan grunted against Changbin’s lips, curling a hand around Changbin’s hip but the younger pulled away with this gleaming look in his eyes. 

 

“Stay here and keep watch. People here are assholes so I know they’ll try something with the bikes,” Changbin ordered with a purr, pulling away with a wink and Chan just stared after him. 

 

The shop resembled that of a witchcraft one, but a little more science influenced if he were honest. He saw birds fly all around the ceiling, the cats hanging around on shelves entirely unbothered by their stereotypical prey, and Changbin grazed a few of them on their bellies on his way to the front counter. A middle-aged woman stood behind it, beads and stones in her hair, on her fingers, and around her neck. “Morning, stranger. What can I do for you?” 

 

Changbin simply showed her his palm and a look of realization flashed across her features. “I’m looking for something.” 

 

“What you’re looking for isn’t in here. Come with me,” And then she pressed a button underneath the desk and the wall behind her sunk in and then slid off to the right. “Our stuff is through here,” She explained and Changbin followed her through the hole in the wall and into a massive room that Changbin knew was masked by their magic. It was filled to the brim in books and little knick-knack. Her collection didn’t have anything on Chan’s, but her book collection did. 

 

“Damn…” Changbin cursed whirling around the large room to look at all the books. 

 

“Now… What are you looking for?” The woman inquired, rounding the corner of her large circular desk and placing her hands on the shiny light wood as Changbin looked around. The younger snapped his head toward her, digging his hands around in his pocket until he pulled out a folded piece of paper that he took out from one of Chan’s older books and sliding it toward her. 

 

“I need the skull of the hare, can you help?” Changbin questioned out of curiosity but the woman looked at him as if he were insane. 

 

“Boy, even if I did have it, I wouldn’t let anyone even _look_ at it. We don’t even know if it actually exists either,” The woman waved a bony finger around in his face, Changbin following it with crossed eyes. “You’re out of luck here, boy.” 

 

“I know it’s a long shot but…” Changbin suddenly pulled out a gleaming sapphire about as big as his palm. “I’ll pay you handsomely for you to tell me everything you might know.” 

 

The woman eyed the sapphire with greed evident in her eyes, snatching it from his hand and turning around to lead the way to a bookshelf off to the corner. She pulled out a thin journal, tattered and torn. “I don’t know if it’ll be much use to you, but there was a man a few decades ago who was attempting to track the skull down. Perhaps you can pick up where he left off?” Changbin’s eyes practically lit up at that. 

 

“Thank you! Thank you so much,” Changbin smiled, turning to leave with the journal in hand, but was stopped by the woman fiercely grabbing his wrist, Changbin turning back to meet her wide, glimmering green eyes masked by large glasses. 

 

“Is he back?” Changbin didn’t answer, eyes flickering down to the journal. That seemed to be enough for her. “My library is open to you. I want to help to the best of my ability.” 

 

“Thank you, Ma’am,” Changbin bowed, and she bowed her head back. Changbin practically sprinted up the steps and through the store, holding the journal close to his chest. Chan was still sat on the motorcycle, arms crossed over the handles as he studied the city around him, a snarl on his face. Changbin found it endearing but approached with bouncing footsteps nonetheless. 

 

“Well don’t you look happy,” Chan grinned fondly when they locked eyes, but Changbin simply shoved the journal into his hands wearing a beaming smile. “What is this?” Chan questioned, opening it to flip through the pages. 

 

“There was a man who was tracking the location of the skull. He died a few decades ago but she figured we could pick up where he left off. She also said the library was open to us if we needed anything else,” Changbin explained, tucking his hands into his pockets and rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet anxiously. Changbin could feel someone staring at him, and his gaze flickered up to see an all too familiar figure stood across the street looking at him with both curiosity and fear. 

 

_Dahyun…_

 

“Shit.” 

 

Chan snapped his head up at that, looking at Changbin and then looking where the younger’s gaze locked and he felt anger swirl around in his stomach. Chan grabbed Changbin by the collar and dragged him down, roughly locking their lips together so that Changbin let out a gasp. Chan pulled away after a moment, nudging their noses together as he spoke, “She is nothing now. She left you in the dust. Show her how well you’re doing without her now,” Chan rasped, looking up toward Changbin and the younger sighed, pulling away with a small smile. 

 

“You’re a mess. You don’t need to worry about her. I know where my blessings lie and they’re with you. I don’t need to prove anything to her,” Changbin pecked Chan’s lips once, and Chan relaxed a little bit. “I love you, and that’s all I need, right?” 

 

“And Jisung,” Chan sassed and Changbin’s eyes rolled into the back of his head. 

 

“And Jisung, our little vulnerable baby,” Changbin snickered, and Chan nodded. “Now put that away. We’re going to go get breakfast and start looking through that journal to find the skull,” Changbin ordered, winking back at Chan when the elder smacked at his ass. When Changbin glanced back to wear Dahyun stood before, she was still there, but a pleased smile stretched across her lips and Changbin saluted her. She shook her head and walked away with a fond smile, and Changbin felt better than he had before. 

 

Changbin jumped on his bike, straightened his gloves, and pulled on his helmet.

 

Maybe Changbin would get to talk to Dahyun again in the future, but that was enough for him for now. 

 

They reached a diner not too far along the street, parking their bikes again outside. “This is the best place in town. It’s quiet and they’ve got good food. We can talk in here,” Changbin uttered, and Chan nodded, both of them hyping off their bikes to walk inside. “Gentleman…” Changbin giggled when Chan held the door open for him and Chan patted his ass with a laugh. 

 

Changbin was entirely oblivious to his surroundings when he walked in, oblivious to who was in the diner as his attention was focused far too much on the man beside him and the journal in hand. “Two please,” Chan murmured to the woman who glanced at them in curiosity and she nodded, grabbing two menus and placing them in the corner booth where they had the most privacy. “Stop it, pick something to eat, love,” Chan laughed, taking the journal from his hands and placing the menu there instead. Changbin groaned, leaning his head onto Chan’s shoulder. 

 

“Can’t you just pick for me? Or we split something? I don’t like making these kinds of decisions! You should know this by now!” It was true. Chan and Jisung stopped letting Changbin decide what they were having for dinner unless the man knew exactly what he wanted. 

 

“Love, just be cooperative. It’s my first time out in years and I’m still acting more mature than you are,” Chan snickered and Changbin beat his chest with his hand, scowling. 

 

“Alright, you big asshole.” 

 

Changbin decided on some pancakes and eggs and bacon, grinning from ear to ear when he told Chan, and the elder placed a small kiss to his temple in gratitude. They ordered not long after, and soon, they had their food and Changbin could freely look through the journal. 

 

“So… it looks like the last place he tracked was a small town just outside of Busan. He planned on speaking with a Yang Joohee. I think we might need to call Jisung,” Changbin explained and Chan pulled out his phone, dialing Jisung’s phone without hesitation, placing the phone on the table on speaker. 

 

“What happened to letting me get some rest?” Jisung croaked through the phone after four rings, sounding completely and utterly pissed off. 

 

“Sorry, baby, but this is important. I need you to go and find everything you know about a Yang Joohee,” Chan apologized, tapping his fingers against the table as he stuffed a bit of pancake in his mouth. They heard Jisung groan on the other end and a rustling of fabric. It took Jisung a few minutes but he came back with vital information.

 

“Yang Joohee died ten years ago in a fire. But her son is still alive. I can send you his address if you think you can get anything out of him.” Chan and Changbin shared a look. 

 

“Send the address. We’re going on a road trip.” 

 

“Be careful though, okay? He’s known for his frequent drug uses, and he’s always in and out of jail. His two kids are in the system right now it looks like too.” 

 

“Okay, Thanks baby,” Changbin grinned and Jisung hummed. 

 

“Would you two mind coming home first? I want to tag along and I have a feeling this is the first stop of a very long road trip.” 

 

“Sure, Ji, see you soon.” 

 

“See you soon.” 

 

Changbin and Chan felt a lot more at ease at that moment, a flicker of hope sparking in their hearts but they kept their composure. “Finish your food before I finish it for you,” Chan muttered, pointing over to the younger’s plate of food threateningly and Changbin glared at him in response. 

 

“You wouldn’t-“ 

 

Chan’s hand flew over to Changbin’s plate but Chan smacked him so hard Chan’s skin began to turn red. “Damn, babe, that hurt!” Chan pouted and Changbin laughed breathily, shrugging his shoulders without a care in the world. 

 

But then he looked up, and his entire world came crashing down around him. 

 

Across the diner, in perfect view, was Changbin’s father drinking a cup of coffee, his mother in front of him and the both of them turning to look at Changbin with this unreadable gleam in their eyes. Changbin’s face lost all the color when he saw his father pull the phone up into his ear, speaking frantically into it. “Channie-“ Changbin choked out and Chan snapped his head up, seeing the familiar man sat at the table and glaring so harshly into him, his pale blue eyes turned pure white and the priest jumped back with a gasp. 

 

“We need to go. He’s called the police. They’ll be here any minute now,” Chan uttered and within a blink of an eye, they were gone and on their bikes. Quite literally too, because the priest blinked over in their direction and suddenly they were gone, the only thing left behind in their wake is a pile of plates with little food and money on the table to pay for it all.  Perhaps he was just seeing things? 

 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,-“ Changbin cursed and yelled over the roaring of his back, freezing when he heard sirens in the distance. “ _Fuck!_ ” Chan was growing concerned for the man’s wellbeing the closer they got to the tunnel entrance as Changbin became increasingly more reckless in driving.  When they reached the tunnels and the ramp closed behind him, Chan forced him to stop. 

 

“Changbin!” Chan yelled so loudly the walls around them shook and Changbin slowed to a stop, breathing heavily and staring off into the distance, not even reacting when Chan hopped off his bike and approached Changbin to turn off the younger’s bike as well and take Changbin’s face into his hands. “Look at me, love. Will you look at me?” Chan hushed softly, shifting his head so Changbin was forced to look him in the eyes every time the younger attempted to dodge them. Eventually, Changbin met his eyes and Chan smiled gently. “There we go…” Changbin practically purred when Chan ran the pad of his thumb along Changbin’s jaw after moving a hand down and away from Changbin’s face. 

 

“I-I…” Changbin stuttered out but Chan just shushed him, bringing his head down and into the elder’s neck in hopes of the younger latching onto him for comfort. Changbin did. 

 

The raven-haired boy wrapped his arms tightly around Chan’s waist and let his tears splash on the skin of Chan’s neck as the elder held him at the base of his neck and swept his hands through Changbin’s hair on the back of his head. Chan rocked them from side to side, relaxing a bit in relief when Changbin’s ugly sobs turned into loud sniffles and his grip on the back of Chan’s leather jacket loosened considerably. Chan continued to whisper reassurances into Changbin’s ears and Changbin continued to tremble in his hold. “It’s okay, Binnie. He can’t touch you. You know that. You’re safe.” 

 

“It-It doesn’t fee-feel like i-it,” Changbin blubbered, tightening his hold around Chan when the elder did the same to him. The fact of the matter was that the trauma Changbin’s father caused him over the years couldn’t be soothed by a romantic partner. Sure, once Changbin managed to gather enough strength to let the panic subside he craved the touch of his lovers, but Changbin had to get over this himself. He had to push through it himself if he could even do that. He would never get over that trauma, but he’d learn how to handle it better, but Changbin needed to do it himself. Chan and Jisung knew that, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt any less to see their lover in pain. 

 

“I know, love. I know,” Chan whispered, never letting Changbin go. 

 

After a while, Changbin squirmed out from Chan’s grasp, calmer than he was before, much, much calmer. _Almost empty_. “We should go. We have no idea how long it’s going to take to track down this artifact,” Changbin started up his bike again, staring at Chan with a blank look as the elder just stood there, staring at him in shock and concern. “Hyung, please,” Changbin breathed out of exasperation causing Chan to snap out of it and hop on his own bike. Just like that, the two were off toward the courthouse again, a tense silence between them and neither one felt like they could breathe. 

 

When they reached the courthouse, it was eerily quiet, and the two presumed that Jisung had fallen back asleep so tried to be as quiet as possible. “Why don’t you go lay down with Jisung. We’ll leave in the morning,” Chan suggested, not expecting Changbin to whirl around with a fiery gaze. 

 

“I’m not a porcelain doll, Chan,” Changbin snapped, “Just because I had a freak out doesn’t mean I need to be babied. We have a job to do.” Chan waited until Changbin stopped ranting before speaking up, a fond but sad look in his eyes. Sure, it was a bit shocking, but Chan stayed calm. Changbin deserved calm. 

 

“I never said you were, Changbin,” Chan cocked his head to the side, not speaking that much louder than a whisper, and that alone made Changbin relax just the slightest. “We’re all tired, okay? Jisung needs to rest and I can see it in your eyes that you need to let your heart and mind rest as well. Go snuggle with the baby. I need to talk to mother,” Chan giggled quietly, taking Changbin’s cheek into his tattooed palm softly and rubbing the softest of circles there with his thumb. “You hear me?” 

 

Changbin nodded, but before Chan could step away, Changbin trapped the elder’s hand against his cheek and moved his face to press a kiss into the elder’s palm. “Come join us afterward will you?” Changbin questioned quietly and Chan nodded. 

 

“Sure thing, hot stuff.”   
  
Changbin groaned loudly, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I change my mind. Don’t even look at me until you promise to never say that again,” Changbin waved him off, walking away and grinning softly which was more or so the quirk of his lips when Chan burst out into his contagious laughter behind him. 

 

Changbin traveled to Chan’s bedroom, not expecting to find Jisung awake and stood at the edge of the bed placing clothes gently into a duffle bag in one of Chan’s large sweaters and Changbin’s sweats. He looked cute with his messy hair, but seeing him made Changbin anxious. He didn’t want to explain what happened, didn’t want to remember it, but due to him frozen in his steps for far too long, Jisung eventually caught him hovering by the doorway and frowned at him. “Binnie?” 

 

Changbin just shook his head and waltzed over to the side of the bed to sit down and peel off his boots. Jisung didn’t say anything, just watching Changbin cautiously as the elder slowly slid his jacket off of his shoulders. When it hit the bed and Changbin slid it off towards the edge, he slumped over and played with his fingers in his lap, deciding if he wanted to tell Jisung or not. He decided he did. “I saw my dad.” 

 

Jisung slowly put down the stack of clothes he was holding, obviously a bit distressed but trying his best to process the information while staying calm. _A lot of things made sense now_. Changbin barely even registered it when Jisung approached him, stepping between his legs and cupping Changbin’s jaw so the elder was forced to look at him. “Is that why…?” Jisung trailed off, not wanting to possibly upset him. Changbin nodded, curling his arms around Jisung’s waist and burying his head into the top of Jisung’s stomach. “I’m sorry, love,” Jisung consoled, pressing his cheek to the top of Changbin’s head and running soft circles into the back of Changbin’s neck. 

 

“Don’t apologize. We needed to go, and I knew that was a risk going in.” 

 

“That doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt to see them, love. You don’t have to act strong around me, you know that” Jisung tutted, tugging Changbin’s head up so he could lean down and press a kiss to his lips. 

 

“Acting like I’m strong is the only thing keeping me together right now,” Changbin laughed weakly, sounding empty and vulnerable all in one go, possibly the state Jisung hated to see him in the most. 

 

“Let go, hyung. I’ve got you,” Jisung whispered, smothering kisses down the side of his face. “You’re safe here. He can’t touch you here _. Just let go_.” And Changbin did. He wept for the second time that day, harsher then he had before and Jisung held him, slowly lowering Changbin down on the bed, moving and shifting the elder with gentle touches and soft whispers and soon Changbin was under the covers in more comfortable clothing and clutching a pillow close to his chest as he sobbed into the top of it. Jisung slowly slid into bed beside Changbin, holding him from behind despite being much smaller in the long run, and curling a leg around Changbin’s waist. 

 

Any other time, Changbin would have squealed and whined about how ticklish he was when Jisung would pepper kisses to the back of his neck, but this time, Changbin melted into it, just as he did when Jisung began to sing to him quietly. This was something they did often together, a tactic that worked relatively well because they both shared a favorite song, and when Jisung began singing, Changbin couldn’t help but sing along.  “Nothing comes even close to half of you,” Jisung sung sweetly into Changbin’s ear, “It doesn't fill me up, yeah. Just half.” Changbin sniffled, making a croaky noise in his throat when he attempted to sing along. “If only I had just half of you… Then I wouldn't feel like this.” 

 

“...Wouldn’t feel like this.” Changbin joined right at the end, stuttering on his words, and Jisung grinned into his neck. “Love…” Changbin trailed off with a croak, his scratchy voice echoing over the walls before Jisung joined in for the rest. “Love the stars,” Changbin choked up, lips trembling, heart stammering, and words stuttering. Changbin felt like he couldn’t breathe before, but it felt much easier now. 

 

“Love… Love the moon,” Jisung mouthed into Changbin’s ear, the smallest of smiles on his lips as he reached out and placed his hand on top of Changbin’s to interlock their fingers. 

 

“Nothing comes even close to half of you.” they now sung at the same time, Changbin still a bit choked up but his voice came out much smoother than it had before once he took in a shaky breath. “If only I had just half of you… If only,” they ended quietly, Changbin much calmer than he had before, but his heart still beat noticeably in his chest. Jisung eased his hand out of Changbin’s to stroke along Changbin’s chest and down his stomach, knowing it soothed him as he spoke quietly into Changbin’s ear. 

 

“Channie’s here,” Jisung warned, and Changbin slowly shifted his head to see Chan leaning in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest. Changbin made a small noise in the pit of his throat and patted the bed weakly for Chan to join them. Chan laughed softly and nodded, taking a pair of clothes into the bathroom to change into something more comfortable and coming out a few minutes later, Changbin just on the brink of sleep when the bed dipped and Chan slid under the cover. 

 

“You two have very beautiful voices, my loves,” Chan hushed to the two, slinging an arm around the both of them so Chan’s fingers grazed the youngest’s side and back. Changbin flushed and laughed nervously when Chan pressed their foreheads together and nuzzled his nose against the other. Chan must have been sleepy too because he wasn’t ever this lovey unless he was sleepy. 

 

“Thanks, hyung,” Changbin murmured, burying his head into Chan’s chest once the elder removed the pillow from the position it was in before. “Can we sleep now?” 

 

“Go ahead, love,” Jisung hushed, still rubbing small circles into Changbin’s stomach and chest, and Changbin nuzzled into the pillow underneath him, eyes falling shut and breaths evening out when he finally fell asleep ten minutes later. Chan and Jisung stayed awake, looking to each other once he was sure Changbin had finally fallen asleep. “What happened today?” Jisung questioned lowly, propping himself up on his elbow so he could see over Changbin and stare at his eldest lover. 

 

“It was after we got off the phone with you…” Chan breathed deeply, doing the same as Jisung so they were eye level. “His mom and dad were sitting at a table not too far away from ours. His dad called the police and we left. They didn’t speak to one another, but Changbin looked as if the man had slapped him in the face two seconds before,” Chan spoke, flickering his eyes down to Changbin and tracing small shapes into his shoulder. Jisung stayed quiet for a moment. 

 

“Did you… Did you see him? After he came out to his parents? Not his state when he got here but the night it actually happened?” Jisung questioned quietly and Chan shook his head. Jisung took in a shaky breath. “They beat him to a pulp. He could barely even walk and see out of his eyes. I don’t… I really don’t know how he came out of that night alive.” Chan’s chest felt heavy hearing that. “I had to take care of him the day after, patch him up both physically and emotionally. He was so broken, but I could see a fire had sparked in his eyes. They _broke_ him, Channie, and I wasn’t sure if he’d ever come back from that.” Despite what everyone might think, despite that Jisung is both the youngest and shortest of the three, he was always the one that took care of them, the one who tried to be calm and collected even when Chan couldn’t. Jisung was still their baby, but he took care of them when they couldn’t take care of themselves. It was a give and take, that’s what made them work so well. 

 

But never had Chan seen Jisung look so broken, even this morning when Jisung broke down in their arms. For Jisung, seeing his loved ones hurt and on the brink of death was more traumatizing than it was to see himself in the same state. 

 

“But look at him now… even after today I can feel that fire trembling and growing in his stomach,” Chan chimed softly, turning his attention back to the raven-haired sleeping male. “You’ve done well, my love,” Chan whispered, lowering himself back down on the mattress and succumbing to sleep, Jisung not too far behind. (sometime later, Yuna joined their little snuggle pile and buried her feather into Chan’s mouth, but they didn’t mind too much. They were used to her very large presence.)

  
  
  
  


They all woke up a few hours later, trained, ate dinner, packed, and then fell back asleep ready for their trip they knew they needed to take the following morning. They were relatively giddy about the trip the day before, but now that they were about to leave the morning of, anxiety flowed through them. They didn’t like the idea of leaving their home alone for who knows how long. “Channie, what about Yuna?” Changbin questioned when he walked into the kitchen to see Chan packing away a large, glowing knife into a bag he opened on the kitchen table. Chan paused for a moment. 

 

“She’ll be fine. I’ll place a charm on the back door so she can come and go. She knows how to take care of herself,” Chan murmured, turning toward the doors in the kitchen that lead out toward the back courtyard and whispering words, palms glowing, and a soft purple light swirling out only to coat the door. When his hands dropped, Chan called out to the fromika. “Yuna!” She came running through the door, all bright-eyed and relaxed feathers as she stared at them in interest. “Go outside, baby!” Chan ordered cutely and Yuna went barreling toward the door, Changbin wincing when he expected her to smash into it, but she only went right through it, Jisung’s terrified screeching following not long after. 

 

“What the fuck, hyungs?!” Jisung burst through the door, looking breathless, messy and downright irritated. All the other two could do was laugh. Jisung huffed, smacking at their chests over and over again until they tugged him right into their chests and trapped him between them. “No! No, let me go!” Jisung screeched, fighting against Chan and Changbin’s grip but laughing loudly when Chan began to tickle his sides and Changbin mouthed slobbery kisses to his neck only to blow on them. “You two are the worst!” Jisung wailed, curling his knees into his chest when Chan picked him up from behind and began to carry him into the other room. Jisung wasn’t all that surprised when Chan threw him down on the couch and Changbin climbed on top of him. 

 

“Be respectful toward your hyungs, brat!” Changbin screeched in that high pitched voice of his that he used only when he was teasing Jisung or speaking to small children. “Why are you so mean to us, huh?” Changbin yelled, pretending as if he were going to choke Jisung, and the youngest shrieked, wiggling in distress but he never stopped laughing, especially when Chan grabbed his cheeks and bent over the arm of the couch to hover his face above Jisung’s and grin down at him softly. 

 

“Stop looking at me like that! You two are contradicting yourselves! What do you gain here?!” Jisung whined when Chan began smothering his face with kisses. 

 

“We know it bothers you so…” Chan trailed off, shrugging before pressing a kiss to his nose and Jisung whined once more. Changbin chuckled softly, letting the playfulness drain away and let his internal desires flood in by nudging Chan’s head away to lean down and press a kiss to Jisung’s lips. It was soft, _gentle_ , but Jisung felt like getting back at the elder so pulled him back down by the collar when he pulled away, riling Changbin up until he was fidgeting for something a bit more by the tiny noises Jisung let out when Changbin began to pay more attention to his neck. 

 

Chan must have realized what Jisung was trying to do so stopped before it got too far. 

 

“As much as I’d love to let this go on…” Chan trailed off with a purr, grabbing Changbin’s attention and hooking his finger under his chin to lean down and press a kiss to his now swollen and spit slicked lips. “We have an artifact to find.” Changbin groaned loudly, but climbed off of Jisung, readjusting a bit before swiftly walking out of the living room with flushed cheeks. Jisung sat up, panting a bit and had equally as red cheeks, but it was obvious he was a bit smug. Chan decided he had enough of that too. “Don’t get too smug here now, baby. You knew what you were doing,” Chan hummed, doing the same as he had done to Changbin a few moments ago and when he pulled away, Jisung stared up at him shyly. “Save it for later. Don’t be a brat.” and then Chan patted his ass and motioned for him to follow after their boyfriend.

 

After that, Chan turned off all the lights, blew out all the flames, made sure they were still protected, and then followed Jisung and Changbin to their motorcycles in the tunnel where they strapped their bags to the back of their bikes. “How long are we in the tunnels for? Where are we even going?” Changbin questioned when they all climbed onto their bikes but before they could start them up. 

 

“We should be in Busan by lunch if we don’t make any stops, you two think you can manage that?” Jisung and Changbin just shrugged at the eldest. “Alright well, let me know if you can’t, okay? I don’t mind stopping and giving your hands a break,” Chan nodded toward them both, starting up his bike and starting forward down the tunnels. 

 

The only thing Jisung and Changbin didn’t really like about the tunnels was that they were unnecessarily dark outside of the cities. Underneath Seoul, the doors that lead into their little underground shops and bars were incredibly common, but once they were going between cities, they became less common, and sometimes they’d go nearly thirty minutes without seeing a door in sight. The darkness was beginning to hurt their eyes too. When they stopped for a breather and the two voiced their opinions, Chan hummed and summoned a warm yellow orb that moved a good few feet in front of them and lit up the tunnel beautifully. It was significantly better. 

 

They drove for what felt like days but was only for a few hours before they came upon another ramp, this one in an abandoned parking garage so they wouldn’t be seen. Changbin sighed in content when the sun finally hit his cool, wind-chafed skin. “Jesus that feels so nice,” Changbin whispered when they reached a spotlight, Jisung and Chan giggling at him cutely. 

 

“Are you a cat, hyung? Our little kitten?” Jisung snickered and Changbin turned to him and despite Jisung not able to see his face due to his helmet, he knew Changbin was scowling at him. “I’m just teasing! Stop looking at me like that!” Jisung kicked his leg out threateningly toward the elder but screeched and reeled back when Changbin reached out for it and attempted to wrap his fingers around his ankles. The two were snapped out of it though by an aggressive honk behind them and the two snapped their head up to see the light was green. They raced off, waving to the people behind them politely. 

 

From there, Jisung took the lead, navigating to the seaside where some of the poorer apartments wasted away in their own filth. Changbin eyed the complex with caution. “This looks incredibly sketchy…” Changbin uttered when they came to a stop and peeled off their helmets to study the place in front of him. 

  
“I told you guys that he wasn’t exactly the most… _respectable_ man in the world,” Jisung leveled, earning a shaky breath from the elder. “Listen, he can’t do anything. Worst case scenario is that he calls the police and we’ll have to leave.” 

 

“No… worst case scenario we don’t find the artifact and the world ends,” Changbin grumbled, but Chan just smacked him upside the head, suddenly appearing beside him. Changbin yelped loudly at both the sudden hit and the sudden presence beside him. 

 

“No thinking like that! We don’t need some artifact to take him down. _There is always another option,_ ”  Chan tapped his chin and then stepped back so Changbin could climb off of his bike and the three could head up to floor three, apartment number 3L. Chan was the one to knock, placing his hands on his hips as he waited and listened for any sort of life inside. It took three more knocks before the door peeled open and a man with deep eye bags and skin so sickly he looked as if he belonged in quarantine. “Yang Jingeong?” Chan questioned timidly, the man flinching the slightest bit. 

  
“Who's asking?” The man gruffed out, exposing his face a bit more and his rather unfortunate looking teeth. Chan eyed his hands, seeing his palm and the very old and faded markings engraved there. 

 

“We’re with the order…” Chan trailed off, showing his palms to the man and letting him study the symbols. Chan stumbled back in shock when the man gasped, slammed the door, unlocked the chain keeping it shut, and then swung it back open only to fall to his knees and burying his face into the ground to show a full bow. Changbin and Jisung sucked in a huge breath at the sight. They had only seen someone do a full-fledged bow once in their lives. 

 

“Shaman! Please forgive me for my rudeness. I did not mean-”   
  
“Stand up,” Chan ordered firmly, but still kept his tone gentle. The man stumbled up, looking as if he were on the verge of tears. “I was hoping we could come inside and speak with you. We have a few questions.” The man’s gaze fell upon Changbin and Jisung stood behind him, dressed the exact same as the shaman. 

 

“Yes… Yes, come inside. Please mind the mess.” Jisung almost gagged when they stepped inside to see the absolute filth this man lived in. Week old food rested on plates in the living room, mice in the corners ran at the first sign of human life they didn’t already know, and the needles and drugs just laying about made Changbin sick to his stomach. “Please, sit, sit!” The man urged when he saw them standing around but Chan waved him off. 

 

“We won’t be in your hair for very long-” 

 

“I never mind the presence of a shaman!” The man insisted, and Chan’s lips fell into a tight purse. “None of us were really sure if you were alive any more… we thought you might have joined Gyuri again… But it’s nice to know you’re alive.” The man beamed, and while it sounded quite normal, the man was obviously a bit delirious at the time if his pupils and fidgeting muscles said anything at all. 

 

“I appreciate that child,” Chan hushed, and the man snapped his lips shut. He obviously caught onto Chan’s assertive and rather passive-aggressive manner. “We are looking for an artifact, and the journal we’re following says that your mother was the last person the writer was going to speak to. Did your mother collect things? Or know anything about the skull of the hare?” Chan questioned, crossing his arms over his chest. 

 

The man cocked his head to the side, a clouded gleam in his eyes until realization dawned on him. “Right… my mother…” Jingeong muttered to himself, scratching at the back of his head. “I think I might have some of her old stuff. Give me a moment.” And then he ran off. Chan, Changbin, and Jisung all shared a look. 

 

“I’m scared to touch like… _anything_ ,” Changbin whisper hissed, earning a kick from the youngest of the three. “I’m just saying! This place could be putting mold in my lungs this very moment,” Changbin waved his arms around in the air but still kept his voice quiet. 

 

“Don’t be rude, Binnie,” Chan uttered, folding his hands in front of his thighs and looking around. “He’s obviously a bit off his rockers. The most we can do is show him kindness,” Chan hushed, and Changbin glanced down like a scolded child. He only pivoted his head up shyly when Chan reached up to nudge his finger underneath Changbin’s chin. Neither one of them got to say anything more though because the man came back in with a box of items and set it on the table. 

 

“Here is everything I kept. I have no idea if anything is of use to you and you can take it with you if you’d like. Whichever is easier for you, Shaman,” The man bowed once more, a 90 degree one this time and Chan felt a bit better about that one. 

 

“I think we’ll take it with us. Do you have a lid?” 

 

After they finally managed to escape that filthy hell, Chan leads them to a small farm in the countryside of Busan, seemingly big enough for a full family and Changbin and Jisung felt much, much better about this one. “Is this where we’re staying?” Jisung questioned when they pulled into the gravel driveway, but Chan didn’t answer. He simply hoped off his bike, kicked out the little metal stand to keep it in place, and walked up onto the porch. Changbin and Jisung shared a look before they too scrambled off their bikes and approached the porch to stand behind Chan as the elder knocked loudly. 

 

Soon enough, an old woman with clay on her hands and across her cheek answered the door with a scowl, but it soon developed into a wide, beaming smile. “Shaman!” The woman cried out, bringing him into a long, bone-crushing hug. Chan laughed softly, patting the woman on the back gently before she separated from him to grab his biceps and study him. “I never thought I’d get to see you again, Chan,” The woman hushed, but Chan just spared him a smile. 

 

“I apologize for showing up on such short notice Yoomi, especially after all these years. But I need a favor…” Chan trailed off shyly, rubbing at the back of his neck, and the woman just nodded her head vigorously. 

  
“Anything, Shaman,” The woman insisted. 

 

Chan turned back to his lovers with a fond smile before turning back to the old woman. “I need to borrow a room for a night. Do you mind hosting us for a bit? I know it’s incredibly rude to show up like this but-”

 

“No need for buts, get inside, all three of you-” her eyes fell onto the two other boys, causing them to flinch a bit at the intensity. “Supper is about to be finished and you lot look starving.” 

 

Something about all of this felt much larger than Changbin and Jisung had ever realized as they stepped into her home. 

 

They’d just have to wait and see. 

  
  


[[MOODBOAR](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1148320750937485313)D]


	15. DUST BOWL DANCE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Well you are my accuser, now look in my face  
> Your oppression reeks of your greed and disgrace”

**March 2020**

 

Growing up, Changbin and Jisung didn’t exactly know what hospitality or a close family _was_. 

 

Growing up, Jisung’s mom died before he could even remember her smile for himself, and his dad walked out on him and his elder brother before he could get to middle school. This left Jisung in the hands of his grandfather, and while he loved him, their relationship didn’t grow from loving roots. Woohyun resisted the idea of having to take care of Jisung and Younghyun until Younghyun had enough and left, leaving a soul shattered Woohyun and Jisung behind along with a few broken bottles. After that, Woohyun warmed up to Jisung and Jisung warmed up to Woohyun. They were family, but they were also broken. 

 

Growing up, Changbin feared his parents, and the only thing they really taught him was how to back down at the first sign of conflict and hide anything that might cause a negative reaction. His parents manipulated him so much that it took a kick to the head to knock some sense into him. His parents beat him, treated him as if he were a slave to them, and made sure he knew he wasn’t anything to them for simply existing. It may not sound like much to the naked eye, but even after he left and settled in the courthouse with Jisung and Chan, his parents still haunted his dreams and habits. It took months for Chan to finally break him of constantly asking him for permission to do _anything_. They were a family, but they weren’t much of one. 

 

Huh. 

 

Growing up…

 

As odd as it might sound, it feels like there wasn’t really a direct change from childhood into adulthood. It feels as if they were born into that adulthood. Or maybe not at all. Perhaps Jisung was born into adulthood, but Changbin had yet to grow up. It’s hard for them to wrap their heads around, and as desperately as they wanted to understand, they couldn’t. 

 

So, that’s why they sat on the floor with six other people with a weird giddy feeling in their chest because this family that oh so kindly allowed them into their home were smiling, laughing, and being kind to one another. An odd feeling settled in the pits of the three’s chest as Chan hadn’t quite experienced anything like this in so long as well, but that didn’t stop them from enjoying the feeling of a family dinner, even if the family wasn’t quite their’s. “So, Shaman, what brings you to Busan?” A boy not much shorter than Changbin but seemingly older and wiser than both Jisung and Changbin, Jihoon they think his name was, questioned with a mouthful of food when the family reached a moment of silence. 

 

This earned him a kick to the calf from a middle-aged woman though. “Boy, we don’t ask the shaman those kinds of questions!” She hissed, stuffing a ball of rice into her mouth and chewing irritably. The boy flushed, bowing his head respectively and shooting Chan a small, shy, but unapologetic smile. It made the three lovers snicker. 

 

“Sorry, aunty,” Jihoon apologized sincerely to her, and Jisung and Changbin cocked their head to the side in interest. 

 

“It’s quite alright,” Chan hummed, waving the family off and locking eyes with Jihoon. “Jihoon right?” The boy nodded, “We’re looking for an artifact. A very, very important one,” Chan’s gaze slowly leveled his gaze to the woman sat at the head of the table, the same one that greeted them at the door and spared them all such kind and paternal smiles Changbin and Jisung almost burst into tears, Sangmi. “I was hoping you might be able to help.” 

 

“I’ll see what I can do. But let’s just enjoy dinner for now.” Sangmi tutted, and the rest of them fell into silence. Not for too long though. 

 

“Sorry, I’m just a little interested is all, but did I hear you say aunty?” Changbin suddenly blurted, blushing profusely when all their wide eyes landed on him. “I apologize for being nosy,” Changbin hushed, relaxing a bit when Chan slipped his hand into Changbin’s lap and patted his thigh a few times reassuringly. 

 

“My parents were killed by government officials a few years back,” Jihoon answered bitterly before anyone else could answer, and a tense silence fell over them. Chan sat up in alarm. 

 

“I thought this area was protected?” Chan questioned frantically, and the eldest man there, Jihoon’s uncle they reckoned, sighed deeply. 

 

“There was a mole. They spread a disease that specifically targeted our genes. We managed to catch it before it affected a great deal of us but my brother and his wife… they weren’t so lucky.” A devasting silence settled over them and Changbin bowed his head. 

 

“I am so deeply sorry for your loss,” Changbin whispered hoarsely, and  Jihoon thanked him quietly. 

 

“I thought they might leave my family alone… that after they took my second eldest grandson they’d back off but they didn’t. They keep coming back, and now that the public knows we exist… I doubt they’re finished with us just yet,” Sangmi hushed, placing her chopsticks down quietly. 

 

“What happened to your second eldest grandson?” Chan questioned cautiously, scared of the answer. 

 

“We don’t know,” The younger woman croaked, “It was the day after he turned 11, and when he went out to the fields to pick some peppers for me… he just didn’t come back. Felix just evaporated into thin air.” After that, they ate in silence, and soon, Jihoon and his twin cousins were sent off to their rooms while Sangmi’s son and his wife cleaned up. This left the three of them sat at the table and Chan getting up to grab the box from their room. 

 

“So, who are you two, hm? I know your names but not _who_ you are,” The woman questioned once it was just Jisung and Changbin at the table, no Chan to guard them against any pressing questions they may not be able to answer. Very much like this one. “Well… I presume a better question would be _who are you to the shaman?_ Not just anyone works alongside the shaman.” 

 

This… this kind of pissed off Jisung. “The shaman just isn’t the shaman. We don’t have to be anyone for Chan to want to work with us. Perhaps we are just of use to him. Perhaps he likes having us around,” Jisung explained passive aggressively. He didn’t want to be rude to the woman who let them stay in her home and be fed for the night, but Jisung didn’t enjoy Chan being seen as something more than he was. He was still human. He wasn’t just the shaman. 

 

Sangmi studied the two for a moment, Changbin staring at Jisung wide-eyed while the blue-haired boy stared at the wall in front of him with a scowl and his arms crossed over his chest. “I did not mean to offend you or the shaman. I hope you can forgive me, Mr. Han,” The woman bowed her head shallowly and Jisung slumped. 

 

“Do not apologize, there isn’t any need to. _I’m_ sorry for getting snappy when I shouldn’t have. Thank you for allowing us to stay for the night and feeding us as well,” Jisung was quick to show his manners, earning a quiet laugh from the elder woman. She waved him off. 

 

“Let’s just both apologize and call it even,” She winked. “Considering you’re his lovers and all.” Changbin nearly choked on his tea at that, coughing erratically as all the color drained from Jisung’s face. _Where the fuck was Chan? What was taking him so fucking long?_  

 

“H-How-” Changbin stammered, eyes wide in fear and clutching the cup of tea in his hand so tightly he was sure it would break underneath his iron grip.

 

“It’s rather obvious. He looks at you in a way he hasn’t looked at anyone else as far as I’m aware,” The woman cut Changbin off before he could ask, but that was when Chan came back into the room with the box they had gotten from the filthy apartment they were at previously. 

 

“That’s not entirely true. She can see strings between people and each string represents a relationship,” Chan sighed in exasperation, setting the box on the table and began to slowly take out all the items once he sat down between Changbin and Jisung. The two immediately gripped his thighs in fear. Chan just looked to them in confusion. “It’s alright, loves. She doesn’t care. If she did she wouldn’t have even let us inside,” Chan snorted, and their grips loosened but they never lifted their hands from his thighs.

 

“Oh… Well, thank you, Ma’am,” Changbin bowed his head politely in her direction. She simply bowed back and took another sip of her tea before addressing the elephant in the room. 

 

“What is this artifact you’re looking for?” Sangmi questioned, slowly lowering her tea on the table and taking the weird, sentimental items from the table where Chan had laid them out previously. “Oh… Mrs. Yang…” She whispered. “You’re looking for the skull.” Chan nodded his head in confirmation, setting the box aside and huffing when he looked at all the contents on the table. Nothing here seemed to be of use to them. They were nothing but pictures, useless ceramic items representing animals and symbols related to their kind. However, there was a metal thing, a moon dial of sorts, and Sangmi picked it up in interest. “Yang Joohee, you genius,” She whispered, a fond smile on her face. The three men just eyed her in confusion. 

 

“What is that?” Jisung cocked his head to the side like a curious puppy, and Sangmi internally cooed at the sight. The boy reminded her of Felix. 

 

“This, my dear boy, is a key. The clan here used to have special vaults, but we moved to better, more secure ones. This is a key to the old one,” She explained, grinning from ear to ear. Chan eyed her, his question rather clear on his features. “I can’t just take you there though. There is a set of four numbers she personalized herself we have to know before we can even get to the lock.” The three men shared a look. “She would have written it down. So my guess is that it’s somewhere here,” Sangmi uttered, beginning to search. 

 

Changbin thought for a moment, “Check the back of the pictures,” Changbin fired, grabbing for one of the four picture frames and opening up the backs. The other three did the same thing, and yet, all of the pictures had numbers on the back. “I have 4. What do you guys have?” 

 

“9.” 

 

“6.”

 

“1.” 

 

“Does it have to be in a specific order?” Jisung asked anxiously, nibbling on his lower lip as he wrote down the four numbers on the top of a piece of paper. Sangmi nodded. “Shit…” Jisung dropped the pencil, rubbing at his face. “There could be hundreds of different combinations!” Jisung groaned in frustration, sinking into Chan’s side when the elder reached his arm around and began to rub up and down his side softly. 

 

“You guys will figure it out. Let me get Jihoon to show you where you’ll be staying,” Sangmi insisted, standing up with shaky legs but batting away Changbin’s hands he held out for her to help. She called out for the eldest grandson, the boy barreling into the kitchen with a wild, alarmed look in his eyes but relaxed when he saw everyone was okay. Sangmi quickly snapped him out of it when his attention landed on the items Chan, Changbin, and Jisung were packing away currently. “Show these boys to the room above the barn.” She ordered and Jihoon nodded, heading toward the door where he slid on a pair of sliders and opened the door for the three when they followed him over, Chan’s arms full with the box. “Have a good night, boys. Feel free to stay for as long as you need to.”

 

The three bowed to her in gratitude and then followed Jihoon out, grabbing their bags from the back of their bikes as well. They approached the dark pine green barn to the side of the house, three cars parked in where cattle or hay would stay, and Jihoon leads them up to the door at the top of the steep staircase off to the right. “We haven’t used this room in a while so excuse the dust, but other than that, it’s pretty nice,” Jihoon explained, sticking a key into the lock of the door and pushing it open before walking inside with the three boys in tow. “The bathroom is right over there and yes, it does work, you just won’t have excessive amounts of hot water so be lenient. Let us know if you need anything,” Jihoon bowed and left right after, not even giving the boys a chance to say a word, but stopped right at the door. “One more thing, lights work,” Jihoon murmured, bringing his palm up to his lips and pressing a kiss into them before blowing it toward the empty light fixtures. Soon, the room was lit up by the glow of peach stones. 

 

Jisung gasped in shock, approaching the stones once the door shut, and grazing his fingers over the smooth texture. “I’ve never seen these before. What are they?” Chan eyed his lover fondly, a light smile influencing the corners of his lips. 

 

“It’s called tremhorite. Only those like us can see it and use it,” Chan explained softly, setting their bags by the dresser and moving the box so it was off the large bed. Looking around, Chan came to the conclusion that this room was perfect for them. The bed seemed to be slightly larger than a king, nightstands on either side and windows right above their head allowing the moonlight to shine through and illuminate the room. There was a desk off to the right of the bedroom door and a dresser to the left of the bathroom. Bookshelves and boxes were scattered throughout the room as well giving it a nice cozy feeling. 

 

Chan’s attention drifted elsewhere however when the mattress creaked from Changbin sitting down on the edge. The raven-haired fire wielder looked tired, maybe even a little empty as he let his shoulders droop and all the muscles in his jaw and fingers go slack. Chan approached him, stepping between his legs and swiping his fingers through Changbin’s curls. “I’m okay,” Changbin whispered, leaning forward to lean his cheek against Chan’s stomach and curling his fingers around the back of Chan’s knees. 

 

“You sure, love?” Chan whispered, still running his fingers through Changbin’s hair to make the younger purr. Changbin nodded. 

 

“I just kind of want to sleep for a few days if that’s okay,” Changbin croaked, voice cracking between words and Jisung laughed softly from behind Chan, reaching a hand out to stroke Changbin’s cheek. 

 

“I don’t know about a few days, but you can go ahead and get some sleep if you want, bub,” Jisung insisted, Chan nodding along as well. Changbin nodded in content, squirming out of his jacket, shirt, shoes, and pants like a child would while Chan dug around in his own duffle for some soft and comfy clothes for the younger to borrow in the meantime. Without hesitation, he handed over the fuzzy black sweats and dark red t-shirt two sizes too big to the younger, and Changbin immediately stuffed his nose into the fabric. Changbin loved the way Chan smelled and would take all the criticism for it if he had to. 

 

“Stop being weird and put the clothes on,” Chan snorted, ruffling Changbin’s hair and breathing out through his nose in amusement when Changbin whined lowly and slipped the clothes on roughly and with very dramatic movements. Changbin climbed under the covers sloppily due to the mush replacing his bones and brain currently, and Chan guided him, tucking in the man’s curled figure and placing a tiny kiss to his temple. “Night, love,” Chan whispered and moved away from the bed to approach where Jisung now sat at the desk writing stuff down furiously in a journal. “Whatcha doin’?” Chan chimed from above, resting his hands on the back of Jisung’s chair and stretching himself upward so he could hook his chin over Jisung’s head. 

 

“Writing down all the possible combinations from those numbers we got today,” Jisung muttered. He sounded irritable, but that didn’t mean he was necessarily irritable toward Chan, just more or so the situation they were in. If someone were to tell Jisung or Changbin when they met one another that any of this would happen… the two would have laughed in their faces. All of this was just so fucking surreal. “There’s so many, hyung. I don’t think we’re going to be able to crack it anytime soon.” Jisung worried, trying his best to relax underneath Chan’s hands massaging at his shoulders, but it was incredibly difficult to not be stressed about everything. 

 

But then Chan was leaning over Jisung, letting his nose run down the side of Jisung’s face until it reached his cheek and Chan could mouth kisses against his jawline. Jisung let out a shuddering breath, Chan’s curls tickling the sides of his face and the breath from the elder’s nose fanning across his skin. It only got a little bit worse when Chan’s hands began to slide from Jisung’s shoulders and down his arms until Chan’s palms blanketed the back of Jisung’s hands to move them so Jisung was forced to look at the markings etched into his own skin. _Right…_ “I think you forget you have nearly all the time in the world, my love,” Chan whispered into his jaw quietly, moving his head to look at Jisung with a cheeky smile and Jisung flushed before elbowing him back. 

 

“Get out of here. Go to sleep,” Jisung murmured with nervous, panicked laughter, and as much as Chan wanted to stand there and tease him for it, he simply leaned back in so he could feather a kiss to Jisung’s lips. 

 

“As long as you promise you’ll actually come to bed tonight,” Chan pouted and Jisung scoffed up at him. 

 

“You’re no better than me, Bang Chan, don’t even try that shit,” Jisung tutted, waving a finger around in Chan’s face, but reeled back with a yelp when Chan snapped his teeth as if he were going to bite the limb. Jisung winced when Chan’s teeth met with a loud ‘clack’ “Go! Christ, I’ll be there in a few moments. I might even be there before you get there!” Jisung grinned cheekily, and Chan gulped. 

 

And then suddenly Jisung was slipping into his realm, and Chan was frozen behind him mid-step. 

 

Jisung did, in fact, get into bed before Chan did and cuddled right up to Changbin afterward who welcomed him gratefully in his sleep ridden embrace. 

  


The next morning, Changbin, Chan, and Jisung made their way down into the main house with their bags packed and ready to go on the bed in the top of the barn. Jisung clutched the journal with 5,040 different possible combinations tightly, as if it would slip right from beneath his fingers and disappear forever if he didn’t. “Morning, everyone,” Chan bowed when he walked into the kitchen to see the twins, their father, and grandmother all preparing breakfast. The four turned their attention to them immediately causing Jisung and Changbin to flinch back a bit, especially when the two twins came running up to Chan to show him a picture they drew. 

 

“Shaman! We drew you a picture!” They cheered, prompting Chan to kneel down so he was eye level with them and he could study the picture with a fond smile. It was their best representation of the very familiar and popular image of the shaman that’s been passed down for centuries. In fact, this painting used to be hung at the temple alongside each and every other council member’s painting. Chan wished they could have added Seungmin’s to it as well… 

 

“This looks great, I’ll keep it nice and safe. Thank you,” Chan beamed, bringing them both into warm hugs with each of his arms and Jisung and Changbin gulped at the sight. “Come on, let’s not bother your seniors anymore,” Chan coaxed, and suddenly he had both twins thrown over each shoulder and carried them out as if they weighed nothing and… _oh no._  

 

“Changbin,” Jisung whispered, staring at the ground as if he had seen a ghost and Changbin gulped, eyes fixed on the ground in the same manner. 

 

“Yeah…” 

 

“We are so screwed.” 

 

“I know…” 

 

They knew Chan was kind at heart, but they didn’t think… they were not ready to see that man with kids, especially with the situation they were in at the moment. Nonetheless, they were knocked out of their lovesick… _baby feverish ways_ when Sangmi called to them, “Morning boys, any progress on the numbers?” She questioned, a knowing look in her eyes. Changbin and Jisung flushed, coughing and handing her the journal before shoving their hands into their back pockets. 

 

“There are 5,040 different combinations. Does the lock have a try limit?” The question hung in thin air for a moment as Jisung and Changbin lowered themselves down into the chairs at the dining table and stared at the two adults making breakfast. Sangmi turned toward them with a mischevious glint in her eyes. 

 

“There’s not a try limit, just a little electric shock every time you get it wrong,” Sangmi winked and Jisung gulped, groaned, and then let his head fall against the table. “Why are you whining so much, boy?” She snickered, stirring the eggs in the pan lightly so they would begin to cook. 

 

“Because I’m the one that’s going to have to try all of the combinations,” Jisung grumbled, showing the woman his time weaver symbol on the sole of his palm when she looked over at him curiously. 

 

“Ah. Don’t worry too much, hun. It doesn’t hurt that bad. Now off you go. Join your third out in the field and relax on the porch,” she shooed them out of the kitchen and back out through the front door, stuffing the journal into Jisung’s internal jacket pocket on their way out. After that, Jisung and Changbin sat down on the porch, watching Chan run through the golden yellow fields with the twins right in front of him. They didn’t even think about it, their hands just naturally gravitated toward one another and before they knew it, they were slumped back in their chairs, arms hanging off, and pointer fingers interlocked as their chests hummed with an unbearable giddy feeling. 

 

They were snapped out of their daze when two pairs of feet came stumbling onto the porch, each man receiving a twin in their lap and a loud cry of  “save us!” Changbin and Jisung giggled, twining their arms around the twins like an octopus and pulling them into their chests when Chan came barreling up the stairs, panting heavily and looking like a sweaty mess. The two wolf-whistled when Chan ripped off his jacket to expose his marked arms through a muscle tee. The twins just stared in amazement, mouths agape. 

 

“You two are demons!” Chan wheezed, pointing a finger at them before standing up fully and slumping backward while placing his hands on his hips. The other four laughed quietly, Jisung and Changbin paying attention to the twins now by running their fingers through the twin’s soft, curly hair. It didn’t take long for the twins to melt into Changbin’s and Jisung’s body, Chan to settle down in the swing across from them, and the family dog, a large, furry mutt by the name of Bear, to join the eldest’s side on the bench. A peaceful silence fell over them, and the twins fell into a deep sleep simultaneously and yeah. That giddy feeling rose in the three lovers’ chests once more. 

 

“This is what I’ve always wanted,” Jisung murmured with a find smile, peering down at one of the twin’s head against his chest, lips pouted and cheek squashed where it was pressed against Jisung’s heart. “I wanted a family, wanted kids. I felt like maybe… maybe I could raise a few kids of my own and make up for my lack of a childhood. Give them everything I didn’t have…” Jisung whispered, glancing up toward Changbin and Chan with a solemn gleam in his eyes. “I wanted a house in the countryside away from the city, a few dogs too… I just wanted a normal life…” Jisung began to tremble lightly, clutching the twin in his lap a little tighter and Chan was quick to slip from the bench and down into a kneeling position in front of Jisung. 

 

“Hey, hey, hey, baby, it’s okay,” Chan whispered, gently taking one of Jisung’s hands resting on the twin’s back and gently clasping it with his two large ones. “There’s no need to get so upset, okay? We’ll have that. I’ll give it to you- _We’ll_ give it to you,” Chan paused, motioning toward Changbin watching Jisung in worry. “I promise.” Jisung nodded, sniffling a few times as Chan took Jisung’s hand up to Chan’s lips so he could press a kiss against the younger’s knuckles that lasted a few seconds. 

 

“Okay,” Jisung frantically nodded, taking his hand away from Chan’s slowly to place back on the twin’s body and pulling the small form into his chest a bit more tightly. Jisung felt like crying when the tiny arms around his neck proceeded to tighten, securing themselves, trusting. 

 

A tense silence fell back over them when Chan slipped back onto the swinging bench. 

 

“When is all of this going to end?” Changbin whispered solemnly, looking like the epitome of defeated, he looked exhausted, as if he had faced a lifetime of this when it’s only been a few years. 

 

“I don’t know… I really don’t,” Chan hushed, burying his head into his hands. Changbin and Jisung slumped back into their chairs, and before anyone could say anything else, the front door opened and Sangmi peeped her head out. 

 

“Come on. Breakfast is ready.” 

  
  
  


“So… what exactly _is_ this place?” Chan questioned, rubbing his palms up and down his arms as they walked along the river where vaults were built into the hills beside them. Obviously, they couldn’t be seen from a human eye, but they were still remarkable nonetheless. 

 

“Back when we were more hidden, we decided to create vaults that would keep everything of value to us. They were almost like bunkers at the time but they weren’t very secure. We eventually replaced them when we got raided the first time. I thought Joohee had transferred like the rest of us, but I can’t bring myself to be that surprised after finding out she didn’t either.” Soon, they came upon a hill with a bright red door adorned with painted black rings and handles and hinges that glistened a beautiful gold. “Each Yang member had tattooed rings around their fingers. They were a very important family so the black rings were personalized.” 

  
Chan walked up to the door and traced his fingers over the rings, studying them. He could feel his mother’s energy flowing through the rings in the door. _Protection_. “Very important, indeed,” Chan breathed. “My mother blessed them herself. I can feel it.” 

 

“The Yang’s were a good family… too bad they practically died out,” Sangmi murmured sadly, but before she could reach out to open the door, Changbin spoke up. 

 

“What happened to them?” Sangmi paused midstep, letting her arm fall to her side. 

 

“There’s only one true Yang left, one whose blood hasn’t been tainted by human guilty pleasures, but he’s in the system now. No one’s seen him since he was about 6.” Jisung’s shoulders slumped, flinching a bit when Sangmi suddenly opened the door and shoved the three males inside. The room just beyond the door was almost a little… science lab-like. There was a large blue light above them that illuminated the white room. “Now, get to work, little boy,” Sangmi patted Jisung on the back roughly before pointing at a keypad by the large metal door in front of them and Jisung sighed. 

 

Jisung began to slip into his own little realm as he pulled out the journal and opened it to the first page, a pencil between his teeth. Jisung began to type in the first combination, and when the room flashed a bright red and an electric jolt zapped Jisung, the boy winced, holding his body with a pout. This would be a long night. 

 

Jisung stood there for ages, and by the time he got through 1000 of them, Jisung was backed up against the wall, hair spiked and singed as his chest heaved up and down. Jisung couldn’t help but slide down against it burying his knees into his chest and placing his hands against his face in defeat. He had over 4000 more of those to go and there was no hard telling that he would even make it that far. His nerves would probably fry before he could even get to 2000. “I can’t do it.” 

 

It’s… it’s hard to explain what happened to Jisung next. He felt like he was at his weakest at that moment, more exhausted than he had been when he went two whole days in his realm. 

 

In fact… that seemed to be the issue. Jisung has spent way too much time in his realm as of late, and all his energy was drained. Jisung couldn’t spend much more time in this realm anymore. If he did… he might completely burn out. But before Jisung could back out, before he could slip out of his own realm and tell Chan that he couldn’t do it with such shame, a weird hum settled over Jisung’s body, bones feeling lightweight as his body began to move on its own. 

 

Before he could even think about it, Jisung was stood up again, and stumbling toward the keypad. Jisung tried his best to will himself to stop, will his hand to stop moving toward the keypad because he couldn’t take another zap. But he wasn’t even thinking about the numbers as he pressed each number, 6…  9… 1… 4… 

 

And then the room turned green, and Jisung’s head pivoted off to face the corner of the room where a blurry, fuzzy transparent shadow of a male wearing robes existed in the corner until it just… disappeared and Jisung went tumbling into the next room due to the door opening suddenly. “Jisung!” Arms curled around Jisung’s arms from behind, but Jisung’s head couldn’t stop ringing. Blood gushed down his nose and onto his shirt when a firm, but panicked grip suddenly lifted Jisung up and around so he was face to face with Changbin, the elder cupping his cheeks. “Jisung? Jisung can you hear me?” Changbin questioned, keeping his voice soft because he knew coming out of Jisung’s realm was like a hangover for him. 

 

Jisung nodded his head twice, freezing when large hands enclosed around his scalp and lips began to mouth at the back of his neck. Jisung knew it was Chan, Jisung knew it was Chan healing him, bringing energy back into his body, but the more energy he received, the more Jisung trembled. “You’ve been spending too much time in your realm. I shouldn’t have made you do this.” Chan looked beyond guilty, and yet, Jisung didn’t care in the slightest bit. At least not at that moment. 

 

“Shut up! Please god everybody shut up!” Jisung yelled so loudly that his head began to pound, everyone else went flying back, and the walls trembled. All except Sangmi. Sangmin stood strong, proud, and very much mischevious. “I’m sorry,” Jisung cracked after a while, slumping back a bit when Chan and Changbin’s arms slithered around him. 

 

“It’s okay, my boy, get some rest.” And then Jisung was out like a light, and Changbin began to drag him back toward the hallway.

 

“Figure out the rest, I’ll stay with Jisung,” Changbin called out, plopping down next to the passed out boy against the wall and pulling his head down into his lap. Jisung was so out of it that he didn’t even purr his sleep like he normally did when either one of them started running their fingers through his hair. Changbin wondered if Jisung would wake up at all within the next twenty-four hours. “Seriously, go,” Changbin grunted when he saw Chan stood in the doorway, watching Changbin and Jisung with worry evident in his features. Changbin wasn’t sure he liked the idea of Chan seeing them as more of a priority than saving the world. 

 

Chan gulped, nodded, and turned back toward the main room where Sangmi waited for him patiently. The attached room behind the previously locked door differed greatly from the entrance. While the entrance vaguely resembled a science lab or a hospital with the shiny flooring and white walls, the attached room looked straight out of a cave. The general shape of the room resembled a dome, the grey stone on both the floor, walls, and ceiling carved into despite the surface being rather smooth. The floor held grooves tracing a large swirl that lead to the middle of the room where a tall stone podium stood tall and proud and missing a piece. 

 

“Do we need that gold thing she had?” Chan questioned, turning to face Sangmi when he realized that there was something missing here. Sangmi didn’t say anything, only pulled out the gold ring and then flicked it open so all the internal rings spread out and revealed a ball with two needle points. She handed it to him, and Chan took it gingerly, taking the larger needlepoint edge and guiding it into the hole in the top of the pole, letting it rest there with a click. The two stood there, watching, waiting for something to happen, but the room didn’t so much as make a sound. 

 

And then Sangmi hissed and smacked her head lightly. “Shit, I forgot…” Chan froze. 

 

“Forgot what?” Chan questioned cautiously, flickering his eyes back to where Changbin and Jisung sat in the hallway looking rather exhausted. Chan didn’t want all of this to happen for nothing. Chan didn’t want to feel like Jisung had completely drained himself in vain. He didn’t want any of them to feel that way. 

 

“When the first vaults were built, the keys had to be sealed in by family blood… we need a Yang member to stab their hands on this little spike and let their blood soak down into the pillar.” Sangmi let her finger slide along the needlepoint, looking rather lost in her own head. Chan approached her cautiously, scared of what she might do or react when she seemed so lost in thought. 

 

“Oddly culty,” Changbin called out, earning a tiny laugh from both Chan and Sangmi. “So that’s not an issue right? We have her son,” Changbin questioned, Chan and Sangmi now hovering in the doorway connecting the two rooms. Sangmi just sighed and shook her head. 

 

“That boy has done so many drugs I’m not entirely sure this thing would be able to recognize his blood. We’ll need someone else.” Chan furrowed his eyebrows. 

 

“But we don’t have… _oh_ .” Realization dawned on his features, and then Chan ran his fingers through his hair, looking back at Jisung and Changbin with distress evident in his eyes. They didn’t have _time_ for another wild goose chase. By the time they even found Yang Jeongin.. There’s no hard telling how much farther they have to go until they find this artifact. Chan couldn’t help but feel a bit sick to his stomach thinking about it. 

 

“Channie… come here,” Changbin murmured, waving him down so Chan would kneel and get eye level with them. Chan’s tense shoulders relaxed greatly when Changbin kissed him softly and rubbed at his knuckles in reassurance. “We don’t have to do this right now. Let’s just go back to the house, let Jisung rest, and really think and talk about what we’re doing here, hm?” _Since when was Changbin the level headed one?_ Chan nodded solemnly, sinking into the warmth of Changbin’s hand on his cheek, even nuzzling it with his nose the slightest bit before Changbin pulled away. “Alright. Now help me up so we can get Jisung back and in bed,” Changbin giggled, lifting himself up as Chan held Jisung upright so the younger didn’t slump back into the floor. After that, Changbin bent down and picked Jisung up bridal style and the four adults left the small vault with slumped shoulders and not very high hopes. 

  
  


If it hadn’t been for the fact that Jisung was out cold at the time, the three of them would have headed back to the courthouse the moment they got back to Sangmi’s house. However, Jisung didn’t start showing signs of consciousness until the sun had set two days later and the rain above poured down with absolutely no mercy. They were was no way they were going to be able to go anywhere anytime soon, that much was clear, so they stayed put. Chan and Changbin took shifts watching Jisung during the day until they could go to sleep, making sure nothing happened while Jisung was out cold, and it was Changbin’s turn the night some hope began to show up again. The raven-haired man sat in the chair in the corner of the room reading a book, sleepy beyond degree while he waited for Chan to come back from doing research in Sangmi’s personal library in hopes of finding another lead on their artifact. Changbin wanted nothing more than to just curl up around Jisung and fall asleep but he promised Chan he’d stay awake. 

 

Changbin’s head bobbed up and down and rolled around and around as he tried his best to stay awake, and he was just on the verge of snoring when Jisung _finally_ began to shift and grumble. Changbin made a noise in the back of his throat, rubbing at both his eyes and his nose before perking up and watching Jisung. The younger’s body finally moved for the first time in hours, Jisung arching his back off of the bed before rolling onto his side where he now faced Changin and curled his arm underneath his head, lips smacking lightly. Changbin watched him for a few more moments, unsure if Jisung would finally begin to fully wake up. But when Jisung slumped back down into the bed, Changbin did as well, a pout on his lips as he focused his attention back on the book in his hands. 

 

Little did Changbin know, Jisung was very much awake, and if not, just simply a little groggy, and laid there studying Changbin with an endeared feeling in his chest. Jisung would have spoken up to grab Changbin’s attention, but when Jisung became too exhausted, he couldn’t speak. He couldn’t explain it, so Jisung had to get his attention another way. Jisung threw his arm out from underneath his head and off of the bed, allowing his face to sink down a bit more into the pillow and a smile spread over his lips when Changbin glanced up and yelped. “Jesus, Jisung! You scared me!” Changbin groaned, dog-earring the page he was on and closing the book to set it aside so his attention was on Jisung and Jisung alone. “How are you feeling, baby?” 

 

Jisung offered Changbin a dopey smile, weakly curling his fingers around Changbin’s when the elder scooted his chair closer to the bedside and slipped his hand into Jisung’s. Jisung didn’t say anything at all, and Changbin nodded in understanding. 

 

“Do you want anything to eat?” Jisung nodded, “Light?” Jisung nodded again. “How about something to drink?” Jisung nodded once more but pulled both of his arms out and hung them in the air as his hands made grabby motions when Changbin stood up to grab the things he wanted. “God, you really are like a baby,” Changbin grunted, guiding Jisung to sit up, taking his legs out from underneath the blankets and stepping between them so Jisung could twine the limbs around Changbin’s hips. Jisung hummed in content when Changbin picked him up and allowed the younger to sink into his warmth, lips instinctively pressing kisses into Changbin’s neck as the elder draped a raincoat over them. “Alright, it’s pouring outside so we’re gonna have to be quick,” Changbin explained as they stumbled down the stairs. Jisung nodded into Changbin’s neck and the two stood at the edge of the garage, just far away enough to look out but the rain did not affect them too greatly. 

 

When it lightened up just the slightest bit, Changbin rushed over to the main house, Jisung giggling cutely at Changbin quiet cries of dismay. The younger pulled his head back so he could look at Changbin and press a kiss to his lips the moment they were on the porch. Changbin groaned into his mouth, but kissed back anyway, ultimately pulling away after a few moments. 

 

“Stop it. We need to get some substance into your system,” Changbin tutted, and then turned back toward the door and opened it to walk them both inside. Sangmi and Jihoon were in the kitchen doing the dishes, both gasping when Changbin came in with Jisung attached to him. “Any leftovers from dinner?” Changbin barely got the words out before Jihoon and Sangmi crowded the two of them and brought Jisung out of Changbin’s arms and into the dining room table where they began to pamper him like a damn puppy. Jisung just smiled and purred in content as hot, steaming food along with ice cold water and tea lowered on the table in front of him. Changbin escaped out of the kitchen and made his way to the library where Chan drowned in books. 

 

Chan jumped a bit in shock when timid knocks came at the wood of the door, whirling around to see Changbin and eyes both softening and widening in realization. “Where’s Jisung?” Chan questioned, stepping down from the ladder that slid along the bookshelves and approaching the younger. Chnangbin stretched and took in a deep breath when Chan twined his arms around Changbin’s waist and slipped his hands under Changbin’s shirt to rub at the skin of his back. 

 

“Awake and in the kitchen being pampered by Sangmi and Jihoon,” Changbin murmured, watching Chan’s eyes light up at the news of the younger being awake. 

 

“How’s he doing?” Chan questioned again, pressing his thumbs into the dimples in Changbin’s lower back and swiping his tongue across his bottom lip. Changbin rocked his head from side to side with a wince. 

 

“He’s not speaking, so he’s pretty exhausted. No more powers for him for a while, Chan. If he does anything so soon… there’s no hard telling what kind of permanent damage it’ll cause,” Changbin murmured, Chan nodding his head in agreement. 

 

“Let’s make sure he knows that though, love,” Chan smirked cheekily, and maneuvered them so Chan could walk to the kitchen with Changbin tucked into his side. The moment they stepped inside and Jisung noticed them, Jisung’s eyes lit up like Christmas tree lights and his lips formed that heart-shaped smile that the two had fallen so hopelessly in love with. The three barely even noticed when Sangmi guided Jihoon out after muttering something about privacy before Chan barreled over, picked Jisung up and out of his chair and then sat down with Jisung clambering into Chan’s lap. “It’s good to see you up and about, my pretty baby… you really worried us,” Chan hushed, reaching up to brush away Jisung’s bangs from his eyes and trail his fingers down to his lips, tracing over the pink skin with a sigh through his nose. 

 

Jisung leaned in and pressed a kiss to Chan’s forehead, his hands coming up to cup the sides of his face and head. Chan knew what it meant. 

 

“It’s alright, I promise. But Jisung, you know you didn’t have to do all of that right? You could have pulled out of your realm. It wasn’t a requirement of you to figure it out. You’ve been using your powers too much lately,” Chan looked far too worried for Jisung’s liking and he wished he could muster any sort of words to reassure Chan that it was okay at that moment, but he couldn’t. Nothing was coming out no matter how wide he opened his mouth and tensed his throat. Nothing. “Baby you don’t have to say anything if you can’t. It’s okay. You know that.” Jisung nodded furiously and tucked his head away into Chan’s neck, peppering a kiss underneath Chan’s ear as a quiet form of _thank you_. 

 

However, Jisung very suddenly got up from his spot in Chan’s lap and looked around the kitchen to the best of his ability. He was still a bit weak and wobbly on his feet, but that was the least of his worries at that moment. He dug around in drawers, arms crying every time he lifted them up, and because of this, Jisung became a little too frantic for Chan’s and Changbin’s liking so Changbin twined his arms around Jisung’s waist and dragged him into his chest. “Alright, alright, breathe yeah? What are you looking for? Is it something to write stuff down with?” Changbin questioned, already a little bit inside Jisung’s head. The younger nodded his head and Changbin nodded, rubbing soothing circles into his tummy while Chan looked for a pen and paper. 

 

Soon, they were all sat down at the dinner table, and Jisung wrote weakly against the paper with sloppy movements. _Fill me in. What happened, and what do we know?_ Chan and Changbin shared a look. “The key didn’t work. The vaults require the family blood to open them and as of right now, we have to search for the Yang son.” Chan hated the way Jisung’s expression dropped the news. “I’m sorry, baby. I know you tried very hard to get us where we are, and I’m thankful for that. Promise,” Chan reassured, taking Jisung’s hand into his own and bringing his knuckles up to his lips. 

 

Jisung nodded and picked up the pencil again, scribbling on the page once more. _Have we tried any new leads?_  

 

“Channie and I have been scouring Sangmi’s personal library for anything we might be able to use, but neither of us has found anything. We figured you might want to take a look considering you have the eye and brain for that sort of thing.” Changbin clicked his tongue, shooting the younger a wink causing Jisung to flush and nod with a tiny giggle. Jisung slowly lifted himself up from the table and allowed Changbin to lead him to the library by the hand. Chan watched them go with a fond smile and his finger resting in the crevice of his lips. Chan just… sat there and thought for a while. 

 

He thought about the situation they’ve found themselves in, and his stomach rolled in anxiety. He had no idea how all of this was going to end, but Chan didn’t think it was going to be good. It was a gut feeling he couldn’t get rid of, and he just prayed and prayed and prayed that his loves wouldn’t get hurt. 

 

He hopes his mother listens. 

 

Chan was snapped out of his thoughts by a knock at the door, and when Sangmi didn’t yell out that she was getting it, Chan got up and approached the door. He opened the slab with hesitance, ready for a fight that may or may not be coming, but gaped in confusion when he saw nothing but a dark, black hooded figure that loomed over him by a few inches. Chan couldn’t see the person’s face but could see that he was skinny and soaked to the absolute bone. “Hello-” Chan didn’t even get to finish his statement before the figure shoved something into Chan’s personal space. 

  
Chan jumped back the slightest bit, eyeing the object in the figure’s hands. Chan sucked in a harsh breath when he saw the thin, black ring tattoos circled around the figure’s long, pale, bony figures holding a tattered old journal. The figure didn’t say anything, only urged it back toward Chan in a more urgent manner than before and Chan took it from the figure. 

  
“What-” And then the figure turned around and stormed off the porch and escaped into the pouring down rain. Chan nearly jumped out of his own shoes when Sangmi whistled behind him. 

 

“Yang Jeongin… forever and always surprising everyone…” She murmured, and Chan choked on his own spit, turning back to the night and attempting to run out and stop the figure from going any further but Sangmi held him by the back of his shirt. “Stop. He gave us what we wanted. That’s her journal. So, let’s go back inside and deal with it now.” And they did. 

 

Chan gathered Changbin and Jisung from the library and now, all four of them sat anxiously at the dinner table ready to look through the journal. But they were only met with disappointment when they opened it and found that everything was written in an entirely different language. Ancient Greek it looks like. Jisung quickly grabbed it as Changbin began to speak with pained words. “Shit… another language? Seriously? How protective can someone get?” Changbin whined loudly. Any other day, any other situation, that would have earned some teasing, but Jisung was too focused on the journal while Chan… Chan looked lost. 

 

“We’ve lost our only lead haven’t we?” Chan murmured, not even looking above table level as his thumbs and fingers prodded harshly into his own thighs. But then Jisung made a noise, a tiny noise of distress and shoved the open page of the journal into Chan’s face from across the table. The entry was still written in ancient Greek, but there was a drawing off to the side, a replica of the skull of the hare. “This is the artifact?” Chan questioned, just to make sure and both Changbin and Jisung nodded their heads furiously. “So what do we do now? Do any of you know ancient Greek?” 

 

Changbin clicked his tongue in thought. “No… but I think I know someone who might.” 

  


The next morning at the crack of dawn, Chan got out of bed with the intention of heading out and back toward Changbin’s and Jisung’s hometown to investigate the library they ran into there for more information. Changbin insisted that he go instead but Chan reasoned that there were too many risks if Changbin were to show his face there so soon. They were probably high alert for him and Chan could get out of a sticky situation a lot quicker then Changbin could. 

 

So, Jisung and Changbin woke up to the eldest of the three bent over the side of the bed, tying his shoes and ready to show when the sun had just barely risen. “Hyung~ why didn’t you wake us up?” Jisung grumbled, scooting out of Changbin’s grip to circle around Chan’s back, still laying down on his side and head buried in Chan’s pillow. The elder laughed quietly, twisting around to place his hand on Jisung’s cheek and stroke it lightly. 

 

“Nice to know you have enough energy for words again,” Chan teased, eyes folding into crescents and lips quirking up to expose his cute dimples that Jisung poked every time they made an appearance early in the morning. Jisung grumbled lightly under his breath but didn’t push Chan away. “You two need rest. I figured I could just kiss you goodbye and go.” 

 

“Well, that just isn’t fair now is it?” Changbin grumbled from behind Jisung, eyes still closed, lips barely moving and facing the ceiling with the covers pulled up to his chin. Chan would have just assumed he was hallucinating the entire thing if Changbin didn’t speak more, “There will definitly be consequences for that if you pulled that shit.” Chan just laughed.

 

“Well it’s not as if you two are entirely coherent this early in the morning anyway.” Chan pointed out with a smile, finishing tying his shoes before standing up to face the bed and tuck the journal into his jacket. “Listen, you two need to rest today, okay? I’ll be back before sundown, okay? _I promise._ ” Chan whispered, leaning down to press a kiss to Jisung’s waiting lips before rounding the bed and doing the same to Changbin. However, the younger dragged a hand out from underneath the blankets and cupped the back of Chan’s head to keep him in place, leaning their foreheads together once they pulled away from their kiss. 

 

“Stay safe, okay?” 

 

“I will.” and then Chan was gone with the gentle closing of the door, and all the lights going out to give Changbin and Jisung their ideal sleeping environment back. 

 

Changbin let out a deep sigh, and Jisung rolled back over to slot himself underneath Changbin’s arm and rest his head on the elder’s chest. “I have a bad feeling about this,” Jisung whispered, sounding beyond vulnerable in that moment, and trembling slightly despite Changbin curling his fingers through Jisung’s hair to calm him down. “Something is going to happen, and I don’t know what.” 

 

Changbin shushed him, grazing his lips across Jisung’s forehead. “It’s okay. It’s okay. Just go back to sleep. We can talk about it once you get more sleep,” Changbin promised, relaxing when Jisung nodded and slumped into his body. Chan’s spot in the bed felt cold, unnatural, and they couldn’t figure out why it bothered them so much. 

  


A few hours later, Jisung found himself in the library with Changbin helping Sangmi cook breakfast in the kitchen. The elder never really learned how to cook, just more or so followed the directions Jisung or Chan gave him before leaving him alone in the kitchen. Sangmi saw this as a perfect opportunity to teach him out to take care of himself and the ones he loved properly. Jisung found it endearing and fully would have sat there at the dining table to watch the fix breakfast but Sangmi ran him out when she saw that his presence made Changbin nervous and a little foggy headed. So, Jisung escaped to the library and began to thumb through all of the books and read up on all the new information that he didn’t get to do at home. 

 

The thing about their world was that it was entirely _new._ There was a history they didn’t teach in schools, there were powers and different types of people that varied from every breathing person. There were places and towns and tunnels that no one but them knew about. There were materials and inventions that catered to their kind only. There was a whole new world out there for them, and Jisung felt like he had to learn everything over again. 

  
It was as exhausting as it was exciting. 

 

“Hey, I brought breakfast,” Changbin suddenly waltzed through the door with a tray full of food and drinks, approaching Jisung’s place on the couch in the middle of the room and setting the tray on the coffee table so he didn’t spill anything. Jisung eyed everything in excitement, all the fresh fruit and vegetables looked so beyond appealing and the smell of the freshly baked bread made him practically foam at the mouth. “I hope it’s good,” Changbin shyly murmured as he lowered himself down on the couch beside Jisung and watched the younger begin to stuff his already chubby cheeks full. “Cute,” Changbin cooed, pinching Jisung’s chin jokingly only to earn a slap to the hands. 

 

“Don’t tease! I like your food you animal,” Jisung pouted with puffy lips and full cheeks and Changbin couldn’t help but feel like he was falling in love all over again. “Okay, so, what progress have you made in your training?” Jisung clapped his hands, grunting a bit at the delicious food in his mouth before he turned and faced Changbin. The elder slumped just the slightest bit. 

 

“I know you find interest in all of this stuff but… I would die to not talk about it for at least two seconds,” Changbin whispered nervously, twiddling his thumbs and to make him feel as comfortable as he can, Jisung acted as if it were nothing. As if his worries were simply casual and quickly changed the subject. 

 

“How’s your drawing going then?” Jisung questioned, and he too felt like he was falling in love all over again when Changbin’s eyes lit up before rushing out to grab his notebook from their room and rushing back in looking like an excited child ready to show their parent the thing they built at school that day. Jisung gaped and gave detailed reactions to every single drawing Changbin showed him, sometimes adding a cheek kiss when he could tell that a drawing was inspired by him or Chan. “Do you… remember when we first met?” 

 

Changbin laughed softly. “I think about it a lot actually. You’ve changed so much since then… since you left town,” Changbin murmured, looking at Jisung with a reminiscent gleam in his eyes. “You’ve matured so much. You’re not nearly that big of an asshole anymore,” Changbin winked, earning a laugh from the younger. 

 

“I was so jealous of you then. I thought you had a perfect life with a perfect family and perfect grades and a best friend and… you were so innocent and naive,” Jisung spoke into his hand, keeping his eyes away from Changbin. “But then I realized that it was so far from the truth. Some fucked up part of my brain thought that maybe I could bother you enough to get you to snap back, to finally retaliate and show your true colors… but I got something a lot better than that.” it hurt a little bit to know that Jisung had purposefully picked on him for that reason, but their lives and themselves were a lot different now. 

 

“I pitied you, if that makes you feel better.” Jisung hated pity. “I learned of your economic status and I pitied you so much. It was… being friends with you felt like something I had to do at first.” And that hurt too, but they could handle it. They were adults now. They were in love, and they knew it wasn’t like that anymore. They had a rough start, but they weren’t perfect, and that was okay. 

 

“You know what… it does,” Jisung grinned. “So we’re even now, right?” Jisung held out his hand to the elder, and Changbin took it with a smile. However, a yelp bounced off the walls when Jisung dragged him down so they were both laying on the couch cuddled up together. It didn’t take them too long to fall back asleep. “I feel like I’ve been sleeping a lot lately.” 

 

“You need it.” 

 

That feeling in Jisung’s stomach somehow got worse. 

  


The next time Jisung woke up, it wasn't because he wanted to, but because he _had_ to. It felt like his body temperature had risen a great deal, and smoke filled his lungs. Jisung’s eyes snapped open in panic when a cough ripped from his throat and bounced off the nearly silent walls. There was a harsh ringing in his ears as he tried his best to study his surroundings, choking on his own spit when he saw the red glow to the room and fire licking away at the walls and bookshelves all around him. Changbin was nowhere to be seen. 

 

Jisung slid off of the couch and onto the hot floor, crying out when the hot wood touched his bare skin. Jisung scrambled up, but the slick surface wasn’t any better on his bare feet as well. Jisung limped away, ripping open the door in an effort to escape and ignoring the way the skin on his palms seered and burned when he touched the metal of the knob.

 

But the door didn’t open. The door remained sealed shut and in one last war cry for help, one last effort to survive before the flames all around him consumed the life from his very bones, Jisung yelled out Changbin’s name using every ounce of energy he had left that shook the very walls before everything went black. “CHANGBIN!”

 

And shook the walls it did. Changbin heard it from the other side of the farm where he had safely escorted the twins and Jihoon to safety. Everything… Everything had happened so quickly. One minute the house was quiet and the next it had practically burst into flames. “Jisung…” Changbin whispered before he took off, ripping his grip out of the twins’ tiny hands and running back toward the house, ignoring their cries for him to come back… that it was too dangerous. 

 

But Changbin didn’t care. The flames… the flames didn’t affect him. If anything, they protected him, clung to him like a damn cloak. Changbin kept screaming out Jisung’s name in hopes of getting a response, and he did. He kept hearing what he thought was Jisung calling out to him, but when he followed the screams and was lead into the kitchen to find no one but Sangmi in the middle with pure black eyes and calling out his name in Jisung’s voice, he froze. “And the cattle come running back to the farm…” Sangmi cackled, voice warped in the same familiar way they knew all too well. 

 

“Chanyeol…” Changbin whispered, realization dawning on his face. Sangmi grinned from ear to ear, mischevious and evil. Changbin tensed up, ready to fight a battle he wasn’t prepared to win. “You son of a bitch, where the hell is Jisung?” 

 

“Probably burning alive currently-” Changbin hissed, moving to run throughout the house but suddenly Chanyeol was in front of him, clutching him by the throat. “Ah, ah, don’t get too ahead of yourself. Get your priorities in check, you stupid boy.” Changbin choked and gurgled and clawed at Sangmi’s hands, trying to get the gruesome grip around his throat to loosen, and in one last effort, Changbin became the very thing he could control. 

 

Changbin became a flame, and consumed Sangmi’s vessel until he saw Chanyeol’s smokey essence leave her body and escape out through the shattered window. Sangmi cried and wailed when she finally got control over her own body, but by the time Changbin could will himself back into his human form, it was too late. Sangmi was nothing but melted skin and wide eyes, just barely alive. “-Bin… library.” that was the last thing Lee Sangmi would ever say and Changbin couldn’t help but feel like it was entirely fitting. Lee Sangmi… forever and always helping. 

 

Changbin approached the library, not sure what he should be looking for but it all made sense when he kicked open the door and saw Jisung laying on the ground, knocked out cold and forming blisters all over his body. “Shit, shit, shit,” Changbin whispered, picking up Jisung and trying to make his way down the stairs. He studied Jisung wordlessly, feeling his heart drop into his stomach at the state of Jisung’s skin. Everything changed that night, that much was apparent. 

 

Because from the flames in the midst of the night, came a dragon carrying everything important to him. 

 

A dragon ready for war. 

 

[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1150793601129037824?s=20)]


	16. AFTER THE STORM

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Get over your hill and see what you find there,  
> With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.”

March 2020

 

All Chan could hear at that moment was the roar of his motorcycle and his thoughts desperately grasping onto any sort of hope they could find from this. Chan’s been driving for hours in the tunnels, watching people come out of their rooms when he neared the city and eyeing him wearily, unsure of who he was until they saw the name on the back of his jacket. It had been a very long time since Chan had shown himself to their people, but he couldn’t bring himself to care so much when he had much more important things to worry about. Chan’s top priority was getting to the master library and translating this god damn hell journal so they could find the artifact and move on with their lives.

 

But that wasn’t the only thing on Chan’s mind. Going back to Changbin’s hometown isn’t… isn’t exactly _pleasurable_. Chan found anger bubbling in his chest the closer he got, and the more people he saw that he knew were an important part of Changbin’s life but only fucked him over in the end. “Excuse me?” Chan whirled around on the sidewalk, cars honking all around him and people huffing and scoffing when he just stopped moving in the middle of the pathway. Behind him was a black haired girl, and Chan tried his best to keep his expression neutral. Dahyun was a fantastic example of this. 

 

“Yes?” Chan breathed, tapping his feet against the ground impatiently. He didn’t have time for this right now. 

 

“You’re with Changbin right?” Dahyun cocked her head to the side, a natural pout to her lips and despite how angry she made Chan just by existing in the same space as him, he respected the brave stubbornness Dahyun held in her eyes. But Chan remained quiet, fearful that he might say something he _really_ shouldn’t. Dahyun caught on pretty quickly. “It’s okay, you don’t have to answer…” And then it was quiet and Chan grew more and more irritable the longer she held him there. 

 

“Was there something you needed?” Dahyun flinched at his ice-cold tone. 

 

She took in a heavy breath before she spoke. “Can you tell him that I’m sorry?” Chan simply nodded and attempted to walk away, but the last thing he expected was for this woman to reach out and grab his wrist to keep Chan from going any further. Chan had to hold himself back, had to hold his anger back. “Am I ever going to see him again?” 

 

Chan wanted to tell her no, spit in her face and tell her that she didn’t deserve to ever see that precious man again, but that wouldn’t be fair to any of them. Chan did not control Changbin, no one controlled Changbin. Additionally, Chan knew Changbin, and he knew that Changbin wasn’t actually angry at Dahyun. Just disappointed. Not that that was any better. “It’s not my place to decide that. If he wants to see you again, he will,” Chan uttered, her grip slipping away from his wrist and allowing him to walk away. That seemed to be just enough for her to let it go and let Chan carry on with his business. 

 

Chan just hoped that he wouldn’t have to see anyone else that he didn’t want to as he pulled his mask upon his face and pulled his hood up so it covered a good portion of his head. 

 

Reaching the library wasn’t the issue, but convincing the lady he was with Changbin was a different story. “Listen, I know you have no idea who I am, but last week there was a guy that came in with a jacket exactly like mine, with black hair, the fire markings on his hand, and he was looking for the skull of the hare,” Chan huffed, hands buried in his hair and looking beyond frustrated. The woman remained stubborn, arms crossed over her chest and a doubtful scowl on her face. 

 

“How do I know you’re not after him? How do I know you’re trying to get the artifact for yourself? What if you’re possessed by that little demon, huh?” Chan’s jaw locked, finding great offense in the mere idea of Chanyeol being strong enough to control _him_. So irritable, that his eyes flashed that great opal that no one else had and she gasped, knocking herself back in shock. “Sh-Shaman?” Chan let out a low growl, offering up his hand when she grabbed for it. When she saw the symbol on his left palm, the only one in its existence, she gasped before falling to her knees and giving him a full bow. Chan felt embarrassed just seeing it. 

 

“Stand up, please. I need your help. You are not inferior to me so there is no need to bow in such a manner,” Chan uttered softly, his irritation washing away and filled with exhaustion and embarrassment as a replacement. The librarian stood up on shaky legs, eyeing Chan in wonder. 

 

“No one has seen you in so long, Shaman... “ The librarian whispered, fidgeting slightly. Chan sighed and nodded, pulling his hand out of his pocket and holding it out to her. 

 

“Please, call me Chan.” The woman gulped and nodded, shaking his hand with a timid smile before they got down to business. “We found this journal written in ancient Greek, but none of us know Greek and this journal has very important information in it,” Chan began to explain as he dug out the journal from his jacket pocket, pulling out the rough leather-bound pages and nudging it in her direction. “Do you think you can help?” The woman looked from him to the journal and back to him, before smirking and nodding. 

 

“I’ll see what I can find. I’m sure there’s a Greek translation book somewhere in this mess,” She hummed, plucking the journal from Chan’s fingers, whirling around on her heels, and walking toward her vast array of books. 

 

“Shouldn’t you know if you have a greek translation book?” Chan questioned. Not to be rude, not to be mean, just out of pure and utter curiosity. 

 

“You know… there was a time where I kept up with it, but so many people come in and out that it’s hard to keep inventory, especially with an inventory as large as this one,” she laughed, motioning to all the books around them and Chan nodded in understanding. No other words were exchanged after that. Chan simply followed the librarian around as she looked for a Greek translation book and soon enough? They found one and got to work on translating the page. 

 

It took them two hours to decipher the first three paragraphs, three more to decipher the rest of the pages they needed, and much to Chan’s disappointment, nothing was useful here. It was simply facts about the artifact and what it did, nothing about where it was and who could possibly have it. Chan felt like he was going to tear his hair out. “Shit…” Chan groaned, rubbing his hands down his face with a whimper. The librarian didn’t lose hope though. She cocked her head to the side in thought, racking her brain for any and all possibilities until she gasped and snapped her fingers, eyes bright with hope. 

 

“I think I knew what can help you.” Chan felt a light grip on his wrist before he was suddenly being dragged off toward the back of the room where a fountain against the wall breathed a thick, purple liquid that glimmered and swirled with knowledge. The fountain didn’t feel evil, but it didn’t feel good either. It was simply a work of neutral. “This fountain was made by one of the younger, newer gods, Daejung.” Ah yes, Daejung, Chan’s godly cousin with a thirst for knowledge. “They say that as long as the items or person you’re looking for still exists and you’re holding a picture of this person or item, the liquid will show you where the person or item was last time it was seen if you submerge your head into the bowl.” 

 

Chan and the librarian shared a look before the woman nudged the journal toward him, the picture of the artifact in the lower corner of the page and Chan sighed. “Let’s hope this works,” Chan sighed, taking the journal, and without any sort of hesitation, plunged his head right into the purple liquid and into a whole other realm. 

 

 _Out of all the realms Chan’s been in, Daejung’s was by far one of the most…_ impactful _realm. Their realm more or so felt like you were encased in dark purple jelly but could swim and see freely as if you were in the ocean or a pool. Daejung didn’t believe in walking because that was far too easy. No, you had to work for what you wanted. Daejung made you swim to them, not the other way around. So, Chan made his way to the large tree in the distance, vaguely resembling the mother tree, but bigger and the base was made out of books and scrolls. It wasn’t long before Chan caught the attention of his cousin._

 

_Daejung had always been a bit weird, a bit out there, but they weren’t inherently evil or good. They strongly believed in the balance and collection of knowledge. Daejung wished to know every living secret in the universe, and Chan couldn’t blame them for that. In fact, it was Daejung’s fault Chan held such an intense collection of books and items in the first place. “Ah, Cousin, I wasn’t sure when I’d see you again.” Daejung’s voice echoed out, rumbling the world around them as the very large snake wrapped around the tree slithered until Daejung’s snakehead that was three times the size of Chan’s body came just a few yards away from where he stood up right, floating in the purple substance._

 

_The thing about gods was that they took on any form they felt most comfortable with. Some took on the human form in their realms so the humans felt more at peace like Chan’s mother. Others took on animal life forms like Daejung, and a rare few took on entire landscapes. Hwan, the god of the water throughout the universe was an entire ocean. “Hello, Daejung. I apologize for not speaking to you more often,” Chan murmured with a tiny smile, inching forward and up so he could press his lips against Daejung’s scaley forehead._

 

_“Don’t worry about it, Chan. Now… I know you’re not here for my company. Why are you here? What is it that you wish to know?” And then Chan took in a deep breath and backed away from his cousin to really look at them._

 

_“I need to know where the skull of the hare is.”_

 

_“Very well.”_

 

_And then Chan was falling, falling, and falling until he landed on a bed in a warm lit hut and couldn’t move. He was in another body, someone else’s body witnessing a memory. The hut looked familiar, but Chan couldn’t figure out why._

 

 _But then everything clicked into place. “Seungmin, love, can I come in?” A familiar voice rung out after a few timid knocks._ Minho _. Was Chan in Seungmin’s body? Chan felt like crying hysterically at that moment. Seungmin jolted up like an excited puppy, rushing over to the door and creaking it open teasingly. Minho’s face was in the doorway, a smile tugging at his lips that Chan’s not sure he’s ever seen on him before. “Hello there,” Minho hummed, letting out a yelp when Seungmin suddenly grabbed him by the collar and tugged him both into the room and into a kiss. Chan felt a bit awkward during this moment, especially when the two fell backward on the bed but… he missed them. He hadn’t seen Seungmin in so_ long _._

 

_Chan almost cried when Seungmin turned his head to look into the mirror when Minho began mouthing kisses into the side of his neck. His little lion… God, Chan missed him. “Hyung, that’s enough,” Seungmin giggled when Minho moved to the other side of his neck and pressed his hands into Minho’s chest for good measure. Minho laughed softly and rolled off of him and onto the bed, turning them both on their sides and holding Seungmin from behind as they looked at one another in the mirror. “How was training?”_

 

_“Boring,” Minho murmured, feathering another kiss to Seungmin’s shoulder before hooking his chin around the bone. Minho’s hands began to wonder as they laid there in silence, Seungmin purring in content until Minho’s fingers hooked around something hanging around Seungmin’s neck. Minho shoved his hand down Seungmin’s shirt and didn’t bring it back out until the object hanging onto the end of some corse string was safely in his grasp. “What’s this, my love?” Minho hushed, raising the skull up into the light so they could both study it and the gemstone eyes it held. Chan gasped at the sight of it._

 

_“I’m not sure… my mother gave it to me when I was little before she disappeared,” Seungmin murmured, eyes locked on Minho's entranced gaze before letting it flicker back to the skull. “It’s pretty, isn’t it? It’s kind of like… my good luck charm I guess,” Seungmin grinned._

 

_“We need to give it an intriguing name. As if it’s some sort of artifact, you know?” Minho insisted, bringing it closer to his face. “How about ‘the skull of the hare’?”_

 

_Seungmin just grinned up at him. “Sounds perfect.”_

  


Chan reeled back with a large, deep gasp, panting heavily as he frantically wiped the purple liquid away from his face. The only thing Chan and the librarian could hear for a few moments was Chan’s loud breathing and frantic muttering of “shit, shit, shit, this whole time- this whole time-” 

 

“Hey, hey, hey, Chan, you need to breathe,” The librarian hushed, placing her hands on Chan’s shoulders and gripping them firmly to ground him. A few seconds later, Chan met her eyes and when they flashed a beautiful, pale pink, his muscles immediately relaxed and his breathing stabilized as if she had forced him to do. “Good… Good… what did you see?” The librarian questioned, curiously evident but Chan could still tell she was worried for his well being. 

 

“I-I need to get back, thank you for all your help!” Chan exclaimed, grabbing his helmet from the front counter and dashing up the stairs and out the front shop door with nothing short of hysteria. Chan grew closer and closer to his bike until someone grabbed him so suddenly by the arm, he nearly fell back on his ass. “What-“ and then he looked up, and never in his life had he felt so angry. 

 

Hovering a few feet away from him was the town’s priest, Changbin’s father to be more exact, and a natural snarl consumed both of their faces. “You… you’re the one I saw with Changbin the other day-“ The priest started, sound undeniably angry, but then in a matter of two seconds, Chan disappeared and reappeared with the priest pinned against the wall of an alley by the throat. 

 

“Don’t you _dare_ say his name, you abusive bastard,” Chan hissed low Enough so no one else could hear them but sounded like he was on the verge of hysteria. Probably because he was. “You don’t deserve to even think about that blessing of a son you had. He is smart, he is kind, he is loving, and he is everything anyone could have wanted in a son, but you couldn’t see past your petty fucking views.” The vein in Chan’s forehead bulged when he spoke, cheeks turning red from how angry he was. “You traumatized the love of my life because you, someone who claims to be all knowing and holy, are by far one of the worst people I've ever met. _But are you all knowing now, priest?”_ Chan roared, eyes going white and voice warping for that last line. 

 

Whatever this man had to say originally, whatever he wanted to spit in Chan’s face was so far shoved down Chan’s pretty sure he shit his pants. 

 

After a few seconds, Chan moved his hand from the man’s throat, the priest trembling as Chan stepped away. “Please, for the love of the god that you ‘worship’ _leave my family alone._ ” 

 

That’s all Chan could hear the whole ride back to Busan, and no matter… no matter how fast he went, no matter how many miles he went, Busan couldn’t come fast enough and his heart wouldn’t stop. 

 

Seungmin had the artifact. Seungmin had the artifact. Seungmin had the artifact. Seungmin had the artifact. 

Seungmin had the artifact. Seungmin had the artifact. 

Seungmin had the artifact. Seungmin had the arti-

 

But then all thoughts were cut off. Chan went numb at the sight before him. 

 

The moon above twinkled and hovered and stared down at Chan tauntingly as its light illuminated the burnt down Lee Family home in front of him. Chan choked on his own spit, turning off his bike and stumbling off of it as he took quick steps toward the house drained of every bit of life. Where was…? “JISUNG! CHANGBIN! WHERE ARE YOU?” Chan’s screams shook the earth itself, stumbling his path as he darted toward the front door and slammed it open with his shoulder to get inside. 

 

Nothing. It had been a long, long time since Chan had been met with an empty house and such intense silence that he could hear his blood running through his veins. He hated it. He hasn’t heard this silence since Jisung got to the courthouse. Chan didn’t want it back now. 

 

“Jisung? Changbin?” Chan called out again, slightly more vulnerable now, maybe even a little more panicked, but when he was met with a crash in the kitchen as a response, Chan’s legs went kicking. Chan expected to find Jisung or Changbin in there But was only met with the sight of a very familiar body in the middle of the room crushed by the flooring of the room above. The house was already beginning to cave in. Chan gasped at Sangmi’s burnt body, so burnt the only reason he recognized her was that there was still a tiny bit of her cherry blossom apron left behind and the sight of it… the sight of it made Chan’s stomach churn. Sangmi was a dear friend to Chan, and while Chan had lost many friends in his time it never got any easier. 

 

Chan bent down on his knees, shaking reaching his palms out to touch her burnt arms and let the skin there glow brightly as Chan pulled the soul from her body so it could be free. “May the mother guide her to her realm, friend,” Chan hushed, a heavy feeling in his chest as he watched the skin melt away from her bones only for those to disintegrate as well into a pile of dust that was swept off the ground and blown away throughout the room. 

 

Chan swears he saw her spirit, young, free, and bright smiles wave at him on the way out. 

 

The house turned up empty, and quite literally as well. It was rather obvious the place had burned and burned for a while if the heat said anything at all, but there was nothing there. The furniture was just… _gone_. This how was cluttered to the brim, but even the library ceased to exist. The house was nothing but empty rooms, and that alone made Chan begin to panic more. Changbin And Jisung were nowhere to be seen. 

 

Chan drifted back outside, stopping in the middle of the gravel pathway and letting his body just… evaporate for a moment. He couldn’t find Changbin and Jisung like this, in such an intense state of panic and hysteria. Chan felt like he was losing his mind, but he didn’t have time to break down. He needed to find Changbin and Jisung. 

 

Words, whispered chants more specifically rung out all around him, Chan allowing his eyes to flutter shut as he spoke out into the cool air around him, something fluttering in his stomach only to run up his throat and slip out of his mouth with a cough. When Chan opened his eyes, a metallic butterfly hovered in mid-air only for it to land on his nose and evaporate into thin air. Chan could suddenly hear two heart beats faintly in his ears, the heartbeats of his lovers and Chan nearly cried when he realized they weren’t too far away and very much alive. 

 

So, Chan followed it. The heart beats got louder the closer he got, and when he went the wrong direction, they faded. It worked very much like a metal detector and soon enough, they were the only thing Chan could hear in a regularly very loud and wild forest. Chan rounded a corner, the heart beats going flat once he looked inside a cave and set eyes on two figures. Chan darted forward, ducking and falling to his knees in front of where Changbin was leaning up against the cavewall with Jisung’s head in his lap. “Oh, my love, what happened?” Chan frantically hushed, taking Changbin’s head into his hands and rubbing his fingers along the younger’s cheekbones to grab his attention. Changbin looked at him with glossed over eyes. 

 

“Jisung isn’t waking up,” Changbin croaked, voice hoarse and worn. Chan’s body ran cold, sinking down so he was sat criss crossed on the ground by Jisung’s body and leaning down so their foreheads were touching. 

 

“My precious pretty baby, everything is going to be okay,” Chan murmured, pressing a kiss to Jisung’s nose, lingering there for a moment. Well… more like for a few minutes but it felt justified. “My love… what happened? Tell me,” Chan whimpered when he lifted his head up to look at Changbin once more. 

 

“Chantelle showed up… possessed Sangmi and lit the house on fire. The twins got out along with Jihoon but I’m not… I’m not sure where they went. Sangmi is dead.” 

 

Chan didn’t say anything at first, just stroking his thumb across the apple of Changbin’s cheek. “I know… I saw and helped her pass over. Mother is with her now.” Changbin gulped and nodded, turning his attention back to Jisung. Changbin couldn’t stop tracing the burns all along the boy’s body. 

 

“The flames got to him before I could. I think… I think he used his powers as well. He was out cold when I found him.” Chan clicked his tongue, looking and sounding defeated. They… they needed to go home. “We can’t stay here, Chan. He needs to go back,” Changbin uttered, on the same page as Chan. 

 

“We… we need to go back and regroup anyway. Let’s go home,” Chan whispered, standing up and lifting Jisung up in his arms. Changbin stood up after him, clinging to Chan’s bicep and burying his face into his shoulder. Chan nibbled on his lower lip when he felt Changbin begin to tremble. “It’s okay, love, it’s okay. Let’s just go home,” Chan hushed, nuzzling his nose into the side of Changbin’s nodding head. 

 

And home they went. 

 

They had to leave 

  
  


Everything felt so foggy. So… _dramatic_ in a way. Everything around Chan and everything that had happened to him that day was equally profound as they were unclear. It seemed his emotions flickered so quickly between their different variations that Chan could barely even keep up and he was a _god_. It’s all… it’s all he could think about really. Even when Jisung was draped over his back as the three of them drove back home, everything passed by in such a haze that Chan spent more time processing everything rather than making sure Jisung was okay. 

 

Chan liked to say that the courthouse had a soul of its own. It breathed, it bled, and it lived just as a human would and its emotions resided on those who lived there. So, when they got there and the large house looked and felt far more gloomy than before, it only sealed in everything that had happened that day for Chan. “Get him to the bedroom,” Chan hushed when they stopped, a dreary tense silence draping over them for a few very long moments before Changbin climbed off his bike and lifted Jisung up bridal style. Chan trembled the slightest bit when Changbin hovered for just a few seconds before leaning down to press a kiss to Chan’s head. 

 

“Breathe.” Chan listened, listened to the sound of Changbin walking away and to the order given to him. Chan sat there, breathing deeply to calm himself down, but the anxiety in his heart wouldn’t go away so Chan presumed he needed to face the problem head-on if he wanted to fix it. So, Chan climbed off of his bike and approached the house with careful and slow footsteps, running his hands along the walls as a greeting. It felt like the house brightened just the slightest bit after doing so and that was enough to keep Chan going. 

  
He reached the door to their shared bedroom to see Changbin undressing Jisung and getting him into more comfortable clothes that exposed the burns all over his body. The skin of his arms, the bottom of his feet, the palm of his hands and the side of his neck were blistered, melted, and charred from the burns, and Chan felt like crying when Changbin begin to wrap all the burns with a cream and bandages once he got the melted pieces of clothing out of Jisung’s skin. Changbin noticed Chan standing there in the doorway, hands fallen at his sides and shoulders slumped. Chan looked empty but hysterical at the same time. It was rather hard to imagine, but that was the only way Changbin could really describe it.

 

Changbin shot him a smile and the small part of Chan saying everything would end up okay somehow got bigger. But seeing Jisung lying there knocked out cold and seriously injured made Chan feel guilty. All of this… All of this was his fault. If he hadn’t brought Jisung and Changbin into this mess- “Things wouldn’t be any better,” Changbin spoke up suddenly, breaking his gaze away from Jisung to look at the man who jumped at his sudden interjection in the tense silence. How did he…? “I can confidently say that if you hadn’t pulled us out of that  godforsaken town and gave us a home, we’d be dead.” Changbin chuckled emptily, breathing out through his nose as he swiped his fingers through Jisung’s hair. “Don’t blame yourself, okay? Deep down we both knew what we were getting ourselves into. We could have left all those years ago,” Changbin let his eyes drift back to Chan. “but we didn’t. Because we love you and that hasn’t changed.” 

 

Love shouldn’t have been the reason they stayed. In Chan’s mind, they should have saved themselves and got out when they did, but he bit his tongue. He knew that would start something they didn’t have the energy for and Yuna, bless her heart, must have sensed this too because she came up behind him, nudged his lower back with her nose, and guided him back outside. 

 

Chan didn’t hesitate to lay on her the moment they got outside and in the grass, not caring if he was dirtying his clothes by laying on the dewy grass or getting feathers in his hair where he laid his head on Yuna’s tummy. Yuna tried her best to calm him down, provide comfort to her human, but Chan trembled and cried in her light hold. It only got worse when she whimpered and nuzzled her nose into Chan’s head. Everything… Everything just came crashing down in one go. 

 

Seungmin had the artifact last, meaning it’s long gone and they lost their ticket to defeating Chanyeol easily. Chan had to face the enemies of the love of his life and put them in their place only to reveal himself. Chan lost one of his very good friends to a demon he should have taken care of long ago. And Jisung… Jisung was so far deep in his own subconscious due to the energy drain he’s faced over the last few days that he probably sent himself into a coma. 

 

It seemed as though all hope would be lost, and even when Changbin came out to hold him, to hold Chan so tightly against his chest there was no way he could just escape even if he could evaporate into a gas, Chan still cried. Chan didn’t cry often, the last time he had was when he saw his mother, which seemed entirely valid considering everything, so a lot of this was built up. Everyone crumbles, everyone breaks at some point or another, even a god. “Channie, you need to breathe okay? Changbin whispered into Chan’s neck, letting his lips graze over the skin as the elder trembled in his arms. Chan took in quick, fast breaths that more or so resembled the panting of a dog, but Changbin laughed quietly and rubbed soft circles into Chan’s tummy. “You’ve been taking care of us for too long… now let me take care of you. Breathe, Chan.” 

 

This time and it took a few minutes but Chan eventually got there, Chan took deep even breaths to control his tears and it worked for the most part. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so, sorry,” Chan sobbed, clutching at the back of Changbin’s shirt collar as he pulled the younger down on top of him. Changbin curled around him instinctively, knowing that Chan needed to be weighed down by human pressure to really calm down, and began to slather kisses along his face just for good measure. 

 

It felt like the world was burning around them, crumbling and giving away at the evil consuming it, and Chan wasn’t sure if he’d make it through the year. 

 

But yet, the sun still rose in the distance, creating a pink and orange sky that gave off a morbid sense of hope _because time does not stop for anyone_. 

  


It took them three months to communicate with Jisung effectively considering he had fallen into a coma that night at the Lee family home. It took some playing around and many, many test runs, but eventually, Chan managed to get Jisung to slip into the same realm Chan could so they could actually talk to one another. Of course, Chan and Changbin were beyond nervous because they weren’t sure if this was going to work or not, but they needed to try. “Are you sure you want to do this, love? I know it can be difficult for you,” Chan questioned as he helped Changbin climb up onto the rock underneath the large mother tree in the middle of the field. Changbin nodded his head with a grunt. 

 

“I need to see him, Chan. I need to touch him again.” Chan couldn't help but agree. He needed the same as well. So, he climbed up on the rock as well, crossing his legs underneath him and hooking their fingers together. “Let’s do this.” _Chan fell into the natural realm pretty easily, but he didn’t move an inch until Changbin got there twenty minutes later, curled around a cherry blossom flower up above him. Chan giggled cutely and shot himself up so he could hook his arms and chin over the edge of the blossom where Changbin sat gobsmacked. “What the hell?” Changbin breathed, flinching a bit when Chan’s fingers slipped into his own._

 

_“Come on, love. We still have to get to his,” Chan hushed, bringing Changbin off of the cherry blossom flower and into his chest. Changbin yelped when he felt like he was falling, but only hovered in the air a few inches underneath Chan. “Just swim as if you’re in the water,” Chan coaxed, and soon enough, Changbin got the hang of it and they were on their way._

 

_It took quite a bit of time to find Jisung’s realm, but once they did, Chan shoved Changbin into the portal without warning and they both went falling large piles of snow with loud, ear piercing screams that had Jisung coming out of the little cabin not too far away in excitement. Chan felt like crying yet again when he popped his head out of the glittering snow and saw Jisung standing on the porch of a cabin with bright eyes and that damn heart shaped smile. “Jisung!” Changbin exclaimed, rolling out of the snow pile and stumbling toward where Jisung was stood at the top of the steps in Changbin’s sweatshirt and Chan’s sweatpants. The two fell to their knees, clutching each other tightly and crying into the other’s shoulders. Chan just watched from the glittery snow pile._

 

_Chan felt like he couldn’t even look at Jisung, but approached them nonetheless to push away any worry they might have for him if he were to just sit there in the snow, playing with it and pouting like a child. Not that that worked. “Channie?” Jisung questioned once Chan stepped up on the first step, pulling his head away from Changbin’s shoulder to look at Chan, study the elder, and decipher what was going on inside his head. Chan internally cursed Jisung for being able to read him so well._

 

_Jisung stood up shakily and then tackled Chan in a hug that Chan didn’t resist. “God, I missed you so much, pretty baby,” Chan whimpered, burying his face into Jisung’s hair forcefully in hopes of hindering his tears. Jisung shuddered at the pet name, clutching Chan’s shirt so much tighter than before, and then they were kissing because they needed it. They kissed so desperately that they could barely even contain themselves. In fact, Changbin had to step in before it got too much for a porch in the middle of winter._

 

_“Hey, hey, hey, not on the porch you two. Get inside, it’s cold and I-” Jisung cut Changbin’s whines off with a kiss of his own, shoving Changbin past the door behind him while tugging Chan along by the collar. The door kicked shut behind them, and the two elders sandwiched Jisung between them with every intention of making sure he knew how much they missed him. “Stop crying, Jisung,” Changbin murmured against Jisung’s lips, the salty tears mixing through but Jisung just whimpered in response._

 

_“Missed you so much,” Jisung breathed, tilting his head back with a gasp when Chan moved his lips from the back of Jisung’s neck to the vein on the side and began to nibble and suck lightly. “So, so, so much,” Jisung kept murmuring, sounding smaller and so much more vulnerable than before. Chan laughed softly against Jisung’s neck, rubbing his hands up and down Jisung’s bare sides underneath his shirt._

 

_“We know you did, baby, but there’s no need to be so frantic. We’re not going anywhere,” Chan promised, pressing a kiss to Jisung’s lobe before diverting his attention back to Jisung’s neck. “Breathe, baby. Deep breaths.” Jisung tried his best to follow, but it was incredibly difficult when your two lovers kept hitting all the right spots on just your skin alone. But eventually, they managed to guide Jisung over to the bed, the youngest climbing on top of Changbin with his knees on either side of Changbin’s hips before they locked lips once more. Jisung’s lips were starting to grow sore, and when it became a lot less pleasurable, Jisung pulled away to look at the elder underneath him, nuzzling their noses together in an effort to express the bliss he felt at that moment._

 

_It only heightened when Chan grabbed him by the hips and rolled him around so Jisung was lying on his back on the mattress beside Changbin. “Hyung!” Jisung giggled, yelping a bit when Chan dragged him forward by the back of the thighs and pressed their bodies flush together. Jisung kept giggling and whining when Chan leaned down after pushing his shirt up and began to place kisses against Jisung’s tummy. The action made his body tense and jolt with a whimper._

 

_“Just relax, baby. We missed you so much and we just want to show you that,” Changbin murmured into Jisung’s ear, and Jisung’s only response was a kiss to the lips and a soft vulnerable-_

 

_“Okay.”_

  
  


_“There’s something you need to know.” The Fire crackled And burned not too far away from them, Jisung finding refuge on the ground in a fresh pair of clothes and freshly showered with Chan on the couch behind him and Changbin poking at the fire he lit just a few moments ago. The two eldest turned their attention toward the younger with worried gazes. Jisung didn’t even look at them. “I know… I know you think finding the artifact is kind of a lost cause but I don’t think… I don’t think it is.” Chan and Changbin shared a look, not sure where this was going. Jisung let our a deep sigh when Chan suddenly curled his fingers into Jisung’s hair and began to play with it gently._

 

_“What do you mean, Ji?” Chan questioned, waiting patiently for Jisung to gather the words. The boy stood up and padded over to the window, looking out into the snowy environment around him and locking eyes with a boy wearing robes and the skull of the hare hanging around his neck. “Jisung?”_

 

_“I’ve not been alone for the last three months,” Jisung uttered, sounding empty and serious but never letting his eyes Looking away from the boy standing in the snow yards and yards away. Chan and Changbin approached Jisung’s stature by the window, glancing over his shoulders to look at what he was seeing and before any of them could even register it, Chan was running out into the snow, bare feet and all._

 

_Chan came to an abrupt stop when he rounded the corner of the house and saw Seungmin staring at him with a tiny smile. “Seungmin?” Chan’s voice cracked, hands clenching at his sides as if that was supposed to somehow contain him and the emotions swirling all throughout his body. Seungmin just cocked his head to the side with a smirk. Chan had so many questions, spewing out all at once as he rushed forward but as soon as Seungmin was there, he was gone, flying up toward the sky and disappearing into the sky._

 

_“What does it mean, Chan?” Changbin questioned from behind them, shivering and crossing his arms over his chest to preserve some warmth. Chan didn’t say anything for awhile, trying his best to consume and process this information._

 

_“He’s alive.”_

 

_“How is that possible? Are you sure?” Jisung looked beyond confused as he guided Chan and Changbin back into the warmth of the cabin so they wouldn’t be so cold. “Channie?”_

 

_“When you die, you’ll have a realm of your own that you can alter however you like but you can’t leave. You’re there until your memory is forgotten. Not even the most powerful of us can switch realms after we die. That’s just the way it is. So… Seungmin is alive.” Chan sounded as if he didn’t even believe it himself._

 

_“Go back. Find him.” Jisung told them both, no room for argument. Changbin and Chan Just gaped at him._

 

_“Jisung But we just got here-“_

 

 _“I’m not going anywhere. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be with you soon._ **_Find Seungmin_ ** _.”_

  
  


Chan didn’t even know where to start. It's been two days since they found out Seungmin was still alive and Chan hasn’t slept at all since then. He’s been held up in his study, going through all his journals, all his books, everything he collected from the rubble of the temple, and he couldn’t find anything. Chan even had Seungmin’s _journal_ , and there was nothing Chan could use to find him. Deep down, Chan knew he had to go back to the temple, but he hasn’t been back since… since everything happened. Minho and Chan left the night it happened once the lava cleared and they could safely leave, and as far as Chan was aware, neither one of them had been back since. 

 

After so many hours of being hunched over, Changbin eventually came and bothered Chan to pull him away from the books and get him to relax. “We haven’t been on a run in a while…” Changbin murmured after twining his arms around the elder’s neck. Not even greeting the poor man as his biceps bracketed Chan’s neck. Chan hummed in displeasure, not even looking at Changbin until the younger began sucking lightly against the elder’s jaw, earning a groan and Chan reaching back to bury his fingers in Changbin’s hair to bring him closer. 

 

“Bin…” Chan breathed out, sinking back in his chair with a shaky sigh. Changbin smirked against his jaw, pulling away slowly with a few more pecks against the slightly red skin. 

 

“Get dressed. We’re going for a run.” Chan groaned loudly in dismay, not liking the sudden end of their little session but he knew he needed to get up and move around so followed orders. 

 

The run was actually very very nice for Chan. It got his mind off of what was going on and onto the burning in his legs and the cold ache in his lungs. Sure, it didn’t exactly sound pleasurable and it wasn’t, but Chan felt good afterward, happy and clear headed and like he could go back and start reading again, that maybe he’d read something that was actually a clue he hadn’t caught onto before. However, before he could escape into his study after taking a shower, Changbin grabbed him by the back of the collar and dragged him back. 

 

“Where do you think you’re going?” 

 

“Back to work?” Chan replied innocently with furrowed eyebrows and a pout on his lips. Changbin rolled his eyes and dragged Chan into the living room, throwing him down on the couch, and covering him up with a blanket before turning on the tv. 

 

“Relax will you? I’m going to go make some tea,” Changbin murmured, leaning down to press a kiss to Chan’s forehead before walking out of the living room and into the kitchen. Chan sighed and sunk into the couch, not really having the energy to fight this so watched the show on the TV. _Shin Atashinchi_ If Chan was correct. 

 

But then the channel changed abruptly, the remote on the table so It couldn’t have been on accident. Chan felt his breath catch in his throat when he saw an interview with Minho playing on the tv. “Mom…” Chan trailed off with a sigh. He knew what this meant. Chan needed Minho, but he wasn’t he wasn’t sure if he could face him or not. 

 

The only response Chan got was the TV volume raising. 

 

“Fuck. _Fine_.” Chan needed Minho. 

  


He waited until the next month to meet with him. Minho and Chan used to meet up once a month in that bar Chan took Jisung to when he was first introduced to all of this and Chan really hoped Minho still went despite the fact that Chan hasn’t been in decades, nearly two centuries of Chan’s math was correct. 

 

The only reason he approached the door so calmly and confidently was because Jisung had woken up that same morning and gave them hope that maybe, just maybe, they still had a chance. 

 

But now that he’s at the door, staring at the stained glass with his hand on the door knob, he became scared. Chan had been running from his problems since the eruption at the temple. Chan’s been dodging everything that made him human and shut himself away in his protective little shell for literal eras… but Chan couldn’t stop dodging his problems anymore. It was time to face them head on so he shoved open the door, and allowed his eyes to connect with a familiar pair in the back of the room, stained red from the smoke of his cigarette and hollow from the trauma they’ve faced over the year. Chan needed to do this. 

 

Chan started all of this, so now he had to end it. 

 

**END OF BOOK 1**

 

**[[MOODBOARD](https://twitter.com/atumun15/status/1153325666810630145?s=20)]**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been working on this story since November, and I've been thinking and planning it since June of last year. 
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> It's become my baby in a way, and it really doesn't feel real that I've finally finished the first book, but just know that it's not the end quite yet. 
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> I apologize profusely for the long hiatuses and breaks between chapters as well, but I'm glad I finished anyway and thank you to every single one of you that have stuck around and allowed me to share my story with you. 
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> Ill see you September 9th ;)
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> -Vesper


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